Chapter 1:
We were just kids then, playing around not caring for what the world had in store for us. We thought we could get away with anything, we were invincible. We didn't know that our actions could spur on a whole whirl pool of troubles at the beginning. If I had of known then what I know now I still wouldn't have been able to stop it. As children we ran around on the cobble streets together using a stick to hit a pebble around, occasionally hitting the unknowing bystander who would yell at us but we kept running, finding another pebble along the way. In the evenings we would steal some left over pastries or loaves of bread before making our way to a giant field of green on the outskirts of the town. We would lay amongst the blooming flowers or grass after we feasted until the last rays of sun disappeared. Then I'd stand up and stretch out my hand for her to take it, she'd never take it. She would shake her head and close her eyes before showing a cheeky grin and saying "I'll see you tomorrow," then jumping up to sprint off. I always wondered if she expected me to chase after her and every time after too much thinking I would shove my hands in my pockets and skulk back home.
As we got older our activities would change, I found a bike on the side of the road one day and decided to borrow it indefinitely. I taught her how to ride it during the summer on the field that was bare, however eventually we grew frustrated with each other after she fell off for the tenth time. She called me a terrible teacher and if she had a better one she would've been able to ride it by now. Of course it infuriated me and being just as stubborn as her I called her a bad student. Other words were thrown around and that day we decided to skip the afternoon feast and with our heads turned away from each other and held up high we went our separate ways. I boasted how I could ride the bike and raced home. It wasn't until a few days later that I decided to swallow my pride and went to the field hoping to apologise. I waited all day for her to come. I sat out in the sun playing with the dried grass, I could feel the heat on my face by time I saw her walking towards me. She sat down closely next to me without a word. I looked her in the face that was slightly hidden by her long black hair and I was about to open my mouth to say the words that I needed to say but her hand shot out and grabbed mine. My heart was racing at that point because that was the first affectionate touch that we shared. I stared gobsmacked at our hands that were now laced together I still don't remember that happening. I had looked back up meeting her intense brown eyes that were apologetic but I could see something else underlying in them. If I wasn't so oblivious at the time I might have been able to understand what her eyes were trying to tell me. However I wasn't blessed with the knowledge I now have at that time. So we just stared at each other, her cheeks gone red from which I thought was from the sun. This being the moment that stirred hidden emotions, I had to ruin it by my impulse to say something, "I'm hungry," was all I could come up with she gave me an incredulous look and stood up quickly "I'll see you tomorrow," she had said with a hint of that familiar cheeky smile. Now however I have a dozen things swimming through my head that I wished I had said instead. When I went home that night the look she gave me didn't leave my mind. I even dreamt of it and woke up confused, the intensity of which she had looked at me I couldn't think of what it could mean.
It seemed from that day on I thought of her more when I wasn't around her and when I was around her I found myself looking at her. Not just looking though I studied her, how she walked and carried herself as well as how her hair was always braided and it hung down her back. I watched her when she spoke, the facial expressions that she made as she explained things or her smile that kept my eyes transfixed every time she showed it off. How I've missed it. Back then I started to touch her more, not being afraid as if her skin was acid. She accepted these and in a way she encouraged them. I remember on that fateful evening on my 14th birthday. We were sitting in the field after a long day of listening to relatives who apparently met me when I was newly born but still asked if I remembered them. She suggested we stay longer and star gaze for a while, so that's exactly what we did. We laid together our shoulders rubbing against each other as we breathed in and out. I put my hand to my side purposely making it brush lightly against hers. She propped herself up on her elbow and faced me. Our eyes connecting for a short moment until my eyes quickly shifted to her lips. I noticed a glimmer of a smile play across her lips. A strand of hair had fell from behind her ear so naturally I reached up to put it back but I hesitated, I realised the type of affection I'd be displaying if I continued the action. However I made my hand move and after finishing the action I rested my hand on her cheek. Stroking it with my thumb I lifted my head up not losing eye contact with her. Moving onto my elbow, I was level with her. Holding her cheek still, I leaned towards her face. Seeing her eyes close I did the same. I missed her lips. By closing my eyes too soon I couldn't see the target so I had kissed her nose. I drop my hand and my head in shame, she only giggled at me and lifted my face up to meet hers.