Hidden Talent
Rated: PG
Category: Humor, Mal/Jayne Friendship, Mal POV.
Spoilers: Small Reference to 'Out of Gas'.
Summary: Mal Discovers Jayne Has A Skill He Doesn't Advertise.
---
I hate this.
I always manage to mess it up real good.
It's unnatural. Man wasn't meant to do this to himself.
There's only so much you can see, for one thing.
I slip, and I pay the price.
A loud banging on my door makes me flinch even as I curse my bad luck.
Jayne's harsh voice does nothing to lighten my mood.
"Mal! You comin' or what? Chow's on!"
"Yeah, yeah, in a minute," I answer, although I have no intention of going to dinner until I figure out some way to fix what I've done.
"We ain't got a minute, Mal! That food ain't gonna last two seconds with this crew!"
"Yeah, yeah…"
"You okay, Cap'n?"
Jayne's large form fills my doorway and his eyes grow wide. I quickly hide the evidence of my activities, but it's too late. He sees the tools in my hands and he's on to me. It's quiet for a second, then his loud voice booms through my quarters like thunder.
"Gorram it, Mal! Look what you done! We'll be late to chow!"
Jayne invites himself into my room and his actions leave me speechless. He takes the instruments out of my hands and roughly shoves me into a sitting position on the small bench in front of my bunk.
Then he steps behind me and smacks me in the head.
Jayne.
Actually smacks me in the head.
Hard.
I'm about to stand and smack him a good one back when I hear the shears that have so recently left my hands slip open and closed. I realize he's armed, and I can't help but wonder if this is how it's all going to end.
Then the world as I know it shatters.
Or at least it feels like it, because never in a million years would I have expected Jayne's next move.
"The trick is to do it a little at a time, dumbass."
I look up at him and there's just enough time for me to realize that while his is not the most complicated style in the 'verse, it's certainly neatly done (and I can't think of when it hasn't been) before he roughly pushes my head back to its original position.
"Gorram it, Mal, sit still."
"Sorry. Just wonderin' what you're doing back there."
"It'll turn out alright. Trust me."
I snort a little, and I know that Jayne knows why. He and I aren't exactly long on trust.
"Oh, shut up," he growls. "I know I got my faults, but this… this I can do."
He's done before I know it, and we're only a little late for chow. And gorram it if he isn't right. I can't even see my foul-up. He's hidden it with the rest, and I have to admit that I look pretty damn good.
Who knew that when I talked Jayne onto my crew I'd get this as a sorely-needed bonus.
I still wouldn't trust Jayne near money or cargo as far as I can throw him, but he sure can cut hair with the best of 'em. Long as I stay reasonably sure he won't stick me in the neck with the shears, he can be my barber any day.