Television Battle
By: Sachiko Suigin Dedicated to: CyberCat and SnowIllusion- thanx for always being there! ^^ (3-2-02 And to TommysGirl...thanx for helpin' me post my first fic!)
Author's Note: Okay, this is a huge crossover between Sailor Moon (Sailor Moon belongs to Naoko Takeuchi, DiC, and Toei Animation, I believe), Dragon Ball Z (DBZ belongs to Akira Toriyama, and I'm not sure who else...), Gundam Wing (I'm really not sure, but I think Gundam Wing belongs to Sunrise Interactive and Sato Noriko...but if I'm wrong, whoever created Gundam Wing is a genius ^^), The Powerpuff Girls (I think they belong to Cartoon Network...sorry if I forgot anyone...), and Toonami on Cartoon Network is incorporated into this fic...I am not making any money off of this (or at least not to my knowledge) and I do understand that the people who dub cartoons probably do the best they can...So, to sum it up, I dont' mean to offend anyone, and none of the characters belong to me. This is the first fanfic I've ever really written in my life! ^^ Well, enjoy!
This story starts out with you turning on the television . The screen on your tv shows a chimpanzee in a considerably dark room with a buch of junk and storage in it.
Mojo Jojo: Hello. I am Mojo Jojo. Since Townsville is starting to get annoying, I have taken over Toonami. I have tied up the producers and executives of the dubbing companies. Mwahahahahaha! Anyhoo, since I am fair, I will let you hear their plea. **Mojo Jojo pushes a button on a remote. On the screen appears the producers and dubbing executives tied together in a white padded room.**
The mass: Help! Damn you, Mojo Jojo! We'll-- **Mojo Jojo cuts the communication**
Mojo Jojo: So, since I rule Toonami, I am cutting all of the regular programming! Mwahahahaha!
Meanwhile, Minako is watching Toonami with Usagi...
Minako: What the flying -bleep- is he doing?
Usagi: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Minako: Who does he think he is? **Suddenly, out of thin air, Blossom appears**
Blossom: He's Mojo Jojo, our sworn enemy!
Minako: Aaaah! A bug! A big flying bug!
Usagi: **suddenly stops crying** Aah! A bug! Where!?!
Minako: **points to Blossom** There! Usagi: Eeeek! Die icky bug! **Grabs a pillow from her bed and hurls it at Blossom. Blossom doesn't see it coming and gets smacked hard against a wall. Minako turns to Usagi.**
Minako: Common'! We've got to get to Mojo Jojo and stop him!
Usagi: Right! I'll call the others! Minako: There's no time! kids are being exposed to...Him! **Blossom suddenly gains consciousness**
Blossom: Him! Where is he?!
Usagi: Aaah! She's alive! **She smacks Blossom again**
Blossom: Oof! Ouch! Oh, the hell with them!
Minako and Usagi rush out of the house. On the way to the television studio, Usagi tries to call the rest of the scouts.
Usagi: Ami, come in!
Ami: What is it Serena?
Usagi: Ahem. Don't call me SERENA. I'm USAGI in this one. USAGI!
Ami: Oh, sorry. But, anyways, what's the problem? Usagi: We've got a major problem! A crazed chimp has taken over Toonami!
Ami: So? It's just tv programming.
Usagi: But, but! What if he goes further?
Ami: Usagi, he's a chimp! As if! Bye! Minako: Don't even try Rei or Makoto. Rei hates tv and Makoto is probably too busy scamming guys.
Usagi: Ugh! Fine! They reach the tv studio. They search every room until they find where Mojo Jojo is.
Minako: Venus Star Power! Make-up!
Usagi: Moon Cosmic Power! Make-up!
Mojo: Who the hell are you?
Usagi: I am the champion of love and justice! I am Sailor Moon!
Minako: And I am Sailor Venus!
Usagi: And in the name of the Moon, we'll punish you!
Mojo: Who? Sailor Goon and Sailor Penus? Makoto: No, you nitwit! Sailor Moon and Sailor Venus!
Usagi: Jupiter! You're here!
Mojo: Oh. Sorry, my hearing's off.
Makoto: Put our show back on!
Mojo: Never! **pulls out a ray gun**
Makoto: Jupiter Thunder Dragon!
Mojo: Monkey Banana Beam! **The two attacks collide in between Makoto and Mojo in mid-air. Eventually they both die off. Minako and Makoto exchange knowing glances.**
Minako: Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?
Makoto: Oh, yeah. **Makato quickly grabs Mojo Jojo, choking him.**
Minako: Venus Love Chain Harness! **Venus' attack takes hold of the ray gun. She pulls it out of Mojo's grip. Swiftly, Makoto lets go of Mojo and...**
Makoto: Jupiter Thunder Crash! **The gun was destroyed. Sailor Moon puts her foot on Mojo's back, pasting him to the floor.**
Usagi: Now, put our show back on! **Suddenly, the door is broken down and knocks over Usagi. Mojo gets up and brushes himself off.**
Mojo: Little blond twit! **Everyone squints to see who had knocked down the door**
Usagi: Muffin?
Figure #1: Who's Muffin?
Usagi: Oops! So it's not him! **The two figures step into the light**
Mojo: Who are you?
Figure #1: I'm known as Quatre Raberba-Winner. And he's Hiro Yuy.
Hiro: **raises a gun toward Mojo Jojo** One, tell us who the hell you are. Two, put our show back on the air.
Mojo: **striking a mega evil pose** I am Mojo Jojo, the bringer of your doom. Mwahahahahahahaha! And I'll never put your show back on the air!
Hiro: Then say good bye. -chink, chink, clink- Huh? What's wrong with this thing?
Quatre: I think you wasted all your bulltets on those Oz characters.
Hiro: Damn. Mojo: Ha! Now I've got you where I want you! Mwahahahaha! **Professor Utonium appears out of nowhere**
Professor: Jojo! You have absolutely no respect! I've put up with that horrible laugh long enough! My god, if you're gonna laugh evily, at least do it right! It's like this, Mwahahahahahahahahahahahaha-Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Got it? Good. **Professor Utonium disappears.**
Mojo: Oh.
Suddenly on a television screen, everyone in the room is able to see a barren desert. In the desert, Buttercup and Vegeta are starting to duke it out. Everyone stops to see the battle.
Buttercup: I want my drawing back!
Vegeta: No, you can't have it! It will inspire me to find a way to get eternal life!
Buttercup: Haven't you ever heard of Dragon Balls?
Vegeta: Plus, it's cute.
Buttercup: Oh, brother!
Back at the television studio...............Goku, Gohan, and Krillin walk through the door. Goku's carring a large popcorn, Gohan's carring a box of Good 'N' Plenty, and Krillin's carrying a medium coke with a hot dog.
Goku: Whoah! So Vegeta can get inspired! It's scarry. **Goku sits down next to Mojo Jojo.**
Goku: Popcorn?
Mojo: No thanks. I'm trying to lay off extra snacks.
Goku: Oh, too bad. Hi! I'm Goku.
Mojo: Hello, I'm Mojo Jojo.
Goku: Nice to meet you.
Mojo: Dido.
Back to the screen....................
Buttercup: I'm saying this for the last time! give me back my drawing!
Vegeta: No! You're not my mom! I don't have to listen to you!
Buttercup: Fine! Then I'll use force! **She punches Vegeta as hard as she can in the cheek**
Vegeta: I'm keepin' the drawing! **He builds a wicked big ball of energy. He blasts it at her.**
Buttercup: You're going down! **She neutralizes the energy ball with her "laser vision." She then flies at him so hard that she knocks him down to the ground. Three pieces of paper fly out of his pocket.**
Buttercup: Thanks for my drawing back! **She looks at the three sheets of paper that flew out of Vegeta's pocket** Hey, these are pretty good. Didi you draw these yourself?
Vegeta: Yah. A guy can't always be fighting. Even a Saiyan needs a hobby, ya know.
Buttercup: I know what you mean. You have a gift, Vegeta, you do. You see people.
Vegeta: I see you.
Buttercup: And...what kind of people do you see?
Vegeta: Dead people.
Buttercup: Oh............I guess that could be cool.
Vegeta: It gets old.
Buttercup: Hey, do you wanna come over to my house to draw, work out a bit, and get a snack?
Vegeta: Sure! I'm starved, thanks!
As they float off toward Townsville, the audience sees Vegeta put hi arm around Buttercup's shoulder...... Meanwhile, the small audience is dazed out in amazement......
Quatre: Whoah.
Krillin: It's scarring me! **He curls up in a ball and starts shaking.**
Usagi: That....Was....Weird.
Minako: No shit Sherlock.
Hiro: **with one eyebrow raised** Ahamunahamunahamuna.....
Goku: Well, ya see somethin' new everyday!
Gohan: What the hell got into him?
Mojo: **Shrugs and blinks a few times**
Makoto: What the...
Goku: Well, common! We're late for dinner you two!
Minako: What! Don't you want to stay and fight Mojo Jojo to get the regular Toonami programmingback on the air?
Goku: Nah...He's a pretty nice guy. Plus, Frieza got pretty beat up in the last episode we filmed. He still needs a rest. Otherwise, I'll have no fun fightin' him! **The three, Goku, Gohan, and Krillin, walk out the door.**
Quatre: **takes out a small voice recorder from his pocket** Note to self. Never really count on a DBZ character in a cirtical situation, unless they actually cause the critical situation.
Makoto: Okay, let's get back down to business!
Hiro: Yah.
Mojo: **takes out a whip and quickly wraps it around Quatre's neck.**
Quatre: Aaah! It...hurts.
High pitched voice: I'll get you free!
Everyone turns to look. They see a girl floating in the air with pigtails a notch weirder than Usagi's. The freaky figure punches Mojo Jojo to free Quatre.
Quatre: Okay, this story is getting pretty old. Okay, what's your name?
The High Pitched Voice: I am Bubbles! Heehee! And I'm part of the Power Puff Girls!
Minako: Aaaauuhh! It's another one of those funky bugs!
Usagi: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Quatre: Aauugghh!........Hey, wait, what am I screaming for? It's not a bug. It's a little flying girl!
Bubbles: A Power Puff Girl to be exact! ^_^
Usagi: I don't give a damn if she's the new principal. It's still a bug in my category!
Makoto: Usagi-san! Such language!
Usagi: Oh, Makoto, save it for later! We've got to get rid of this little......female bug mutant.
Bubbles: Hey! That was mean! Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! **At the sound of Bubbles' crying, Blossom, Buttercup, and Vegeta appear in the doorway.**
Blossom: What's wrong Bubbles?
Bubbes: They, **she points over to Usagi and Minako** were being mean to me! They called me some type of bug mutant!
Buttercup: No one, repeat, no one, calls our sister a mutant!
Blossom: And to add insult to injury, a mutant BUG, no less!
Buttercup: for that, we'll kick your little tushies!
Usagi: Um, I believe the better word would be ass.
Buttercup: I know, but I'll get grounded if I cuss.
Usagi: I really pity you.
Buttercup: Yah, well I'm gonna really pity you once I'm through with you! I'll take the meatball head! Blossom and Bubbles, take the one with the red bow. Vegeta, if you don't mind, could you just back any of us up?
Vegeta: Sure thing.
And so the mini battle begins. Quatre, Hiro, Makoto, and Mojo Jojo slink away into a corner. Duo appears from an unknown source, and recaps the battle.
Duo: And Buttercup takes a wipe at Moon, but she ducks. Blossom tries to freeze Venus, but Venus attacks back with Crescent Beem Smash. Buttercup takes hold of Moon's right pigtail. Oh! She's swinging her around the room. Ya know that's gotta hurt! What! What's this? It looks like Bubbles is straying from the fight! I guess she really doesn't want to fight anymore!
Bubbles: Mr. Announcer Guy...
Duo: Yes?
Bubbles: Could you not do that anymore?
Duo: Okay, I guess. But my job's really fun....Do you think you'd like to do it instead?
Bubbles: uhh, okey-dokey!
Duo: **mumbling to himself** Thank god I got away from that awful job! ~.~
Bubbles: Ouch! Sailor Moon kicks Buttercup! Oh no, this doesn't look good for the scouts........Or us! Aaaahh! I can't watch!
Soon everyone creates a big cloud of dust. Makoto sees that this battle is doing no good, and getting nowhere. (Although it's a good source of entertainment for Mojo Jojo.) Makoto quietly walks up to Bubbles.
Makoto: Um, Bubbles?
Bubbles: W-w-w-what do you want?
Makoto: I just think that you should know something.
Bubbles: What?
Makoto: Mojo Jojo is the real bad guy.
Bubbles: Well, duh!
Makoto: So how about we all gang up on him so we can all get the regular Toonami programming back on the air?
Bubbles: Well, ya know, I'd love to.
Makoto: Really?
Bubbles: But, they were being mean to me so they have to pay! **Hiro sees what Makoto is trying to do. He also sees that she's getting absolutely nowhere.**
Hiro: Hey Power Puff. Mojo Jojo made them say that.
Bubbles: Oh no. I've got to stop the battle. **she takes a deep breath** SSTTOPPPPP!!!!
**Everyone stops**
Bubbles: Huddle! **The three Power Puffs huddle in a small circle to let Bubbles explain what Hiro had told her.**
Makoto: **turning to Hiro** Smooth thinkin'
Hiro: **Just smiles a little**
The three girls break the huddle. Buttercup whispers some orders into Vegeta's ear.
Vegeta: Will do! **Vegeta flies through the air up to Mojo Jojo**
Vegeta: You will be terminated
. Mojo: A-are you sure you want to do this?
Vegeta: Oh, yeah. No sooner than a blink, there was another big cloud of dust.
Makoto: Ow...
Blossom: Serves him right!
Buttercup: Yeah. Give him a right, then a left...
Usagi and Minako: Go get him!
Quatre and Hiro were silent, along with Bubbles who really didn't want to watch...Duo had disappeared somewhere with help from that unknown source. Well, I guess you could say that they rest is history. Toonami got its regular programming back on the air, and it never got any interruptions like that again. And, you may be asking what happened to Mojo Jojo. Well, from what I hear, he's still in the hospital recovering.
You suddenly see the scene change to the hospital room that Mojo Jojo is in. Currently, he's still in a body cast.
Mojo: I'll get that blasted Vegeta...and those Sailor Scouts... Dun, dun, dun, dah......Dun, dun, dun, dah........
Author's note: Well, I hope you enjoyed that...If you have any comments, please e-mail me at sachiko_suigin@sailormoon.com. Thank you. Ja ne! ^^
~Sachiko Suigin~