Hey everyone. I wanted to write a serious story to how I do. Please tell me if it's alright! I didn't proof read...So I'm sorry if it's messed up.
Song: Always Be My Baby - David Cook.
I advise you to play this song repeatedly--over and over again as you read the entire story. It makes it better, I think. )
Anyway, enjoy! and Review!
EPOV
I was surrounded by people hustling and bustling around frantically; trying to get everything organized. I could hear orders being barked from person to person. It was obvious that everyone was stressed out just wanting everything to go as smoothly as possible.
I was the complete opposite of my environment. I sat at a corner on one of the larger amplifiers they had backstage. No one was beside me, I was just staring out into space, and that's just how I liked it. I didn't want people around me. I didn't want them to ask me what was wrong or how I was doing. I didn't want any of their pity. It would just remind me of everything I lost.
My acoustic guitar was the only thing keeping me company. Its wooden shell stayed silent; never saying a word. This was perfect for me, just blending in the background of life.
I wore an expression that can only be described as blank. It held no emotion; no happiness, no anger, no sadness and especially no pain. But on the inside, I felt the most excruciating pain I have ever imagined; so much to the point where the only expression ever evident on my face was that same catatonic state. I was defective and unresponsive. I was numb.
Reminding myself that I had chosen on my own free will to be here right now, I closed my eyes; calming the fierce fire in my chest that threatened to take over my whole body.
Today was the day Forks had their annual Music Festival. People all around, some not even from Forks, would come to this event to sing, to dance or to perform. Students from schools, professors, families, basically everyone would attend. It was the only time you could see all of Forks in one area.
It was usually such a happy event. Where people would entertain to please the audience or to perform for the sake of doing what they love to do. But for me, right now, it was different.
It was a way for me to say goodbye. I'm not doing this for the audience or even for me. I'm doing this for her.
She had always wanted me to play to a live audience, saying that everyone would be mesmerized by the emotions that spilled out of me as I strummed my guitar. I didn't understand why she didn't just accept the fact that I only played for her. Music was something special to me and I only wanted to share it with her and nobody else.
"Why not, Edward? Everyone will love you! And who knows, you might get discovered and move to Hollywood!" she a dreamy look in her eyes and they started to sparkle. She was so beautiful.
"Because Bella, normal people don't understand me the way you do. They might think I was playing another ordinary song. They won't appreciate it and therefore, there's no reason I should play for such an unappreciative bunch." As I explained to her my perspective, her pout grew more prominent. She looked adorable whenever she did that; so innocent and naïve.
I just shook my head at her.
"Ok fine, Edward. But one day! Some kind of force in this world is going to make you get up on that stage and dazzle the public!" with that she gave me a quick kiss before leaving my room to head for the kitchen.
I could only stare at her retreating form. Even if we didn't agree on a certain thing, she still managed to make me love her even more.
She was always so stubborn. She would never let anything go if she knew it would help or benefit the other person in any way. Her heart was kind and pure and that was the first thing that made me fall so madly in love with her.
Thinking of her would just make my heart ache, I knew that. But I couldn't stop myself. Everyday I spent with her always meant something to me. She made me feel complete and alive. Never had I smiled so much when I wasn't with her. Just her presence could make my heart leap and melt at the same time.
We watched the first snowfall of November through the large glass windows.
I wrapped my arms around her while she stared outside in amazement. She always got lost in her thoughts; thinking about anything and everything. I silently prayed that I had the power to read her mind.
"What are you thinking about, love?" I asked her as I rested my chin on her shoulder.
"Just how lucky I am to have the one thing I've always dreamed of having." She smiled.
"And what would that be?" I gave her a slight peck on the cheek.
She turned to face me now. Looking completely serious yet relaxed.
"You."
I stared at her for a moment, totally taken aback by how much I meant to her. I said the only thing that deemed worthy of the moment.
"I love you, Bella."
"I love you too, Edward. More than you could ever imagine." We celebrated the first proclamation of our love with a passionate kiss.
The band on stage right now, played the last note to their last song. I heard applause and whistling coming from the crowd. As soon as the reaction from the audience would die down; the host would return to stage and compliment the previous band. After, he would announce the next performer.
Me.
I wasn't nervous; I didn't have a problem performing in front of the public. The only reason I never did before was because I had her. She was my everything. I didn't need to hear compliments or appreciation from anyone else when I had her by my side; smiling lovingly at me after every song I played for her.
"Thank you Sonic Blast! That was a mind blowing performance! And now, for the last performer for this evening, with his first time on stage, I'm pleased to present; Edward Cullen!"
I stood up, picked up my guitar and walked through the cramped backstage.
She wanted me to do this, she pleaded with me so many time to consider. But I always refused. She never gave up though, and now, this time was different, I would not deny her. I could never deny her again.
When I emerged from the curtains, I was immediately met with hundreds of eyes staring at me. Judging every move I made. It didn't falter me; I was here for only one reason. And I would complete that reason, flawlessly. For her.
I sat down on a stool that was placed in the middle-front of the stage. Two mic stands were placed in front of me, one right if front of my face and another one right by my guitar. I was about to start when again, I looked out to the audience.
I quickly scanned around the area and it didn't take me long to find my family. My parents, Carlisle and Esme, sat next to each other, holding hands and looking at me with tears in their eyes. Next to them sat Alice and Jasper; Alice smiled brightly and Jasper just gave me a small nod of encouragement. I nodded back. Beside them sat Rosalie and Emmett; he gave me two big thumbs up and even Rosalie gave me a small smile.
As I took in all their emotions, I felt something.
I was scared.
Scared to feel everything again, to feel the pain that I tried so hard to repress in the last year. I didn't want to go back to feeling like I had nothing, that I was nothing. There was no more meaning in my life without her. I didn't want to continue to live for no meaning, I wanted to end it but I knew she wouldn't want me to. She wanted me to move on and live life again, to feel again. But I couldn't. No matter what I did, I still felt as empty as the day it all happened.
I waited outside school for Bella to be dismissed from her class. Our senior year in college was extremely hectic but we always had each other to keep us sane; we hardly any classes together since I was taking up medicine and she was taking up literature. We tried to spend as much time with each other as possible and for now, it was enough. The year was finally coming close to an end and right after graduation next week; I would ask Bella to marry me.
We were young—yes, but we were also in love. Nothing made me happier than being with her, than having her in my life. Till this day, I was amazed she had chosen me out of her many admirers. She said guys never liked her or noticed since she was so ordinary—I scoffed every time that subject was brought up. She clearly did not see all the guys in our school who would gawk whenever she passed them; the way her long brown hair would be swayed by the wind and her deep brown eyes that always held so much passion in them.
Her beauty reflected her soul. She was kind, caring, understanding, supportive—all the good adjectives you could ever think of. And she was mine. A week from now, I'd make it official.
I tried my best to push back the memories, now was not the time to remember. I didn't want my emotions to cloud over everything and I'd lose focus on the task at hand.
So I started to play. Hoping that starting the song would suppress the pain.
The sound and vibration from my acoustic guitar filled the area. It was gentle and soft but also precise. It sounded perfect.
I parted my lips to sing the song that held so much of what I wanted to express.
We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine
I smiled at the words. Every single word that left me was true. They would always be true.
She finally appeared through the large double door entrance of the school. She was looking around worriedly until she spotted what she desired.
Our eyes locked for a moment and she smiled at me. There was so much love that one smile. I had to remind myself that I wasn't imagining how lucky I was to have her.
I stood across the street from the school. I didn't bother moving or taking a step forward because she had always mentioned how she loved to run into my arms and hug me as tight as she possibly could.
Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die
No!
And as if on cue, she started to run down the steps and make her way through the crowd of students that started to assemble around the area. I waited as patiently as I could to feel her pressed against my chest and my arms around her body. She always felt so right in my arms, like we were a puzzle that just fit together perfectly.
My fingers itched to touch her, the need was almost unbearable. She always had this effect on me; to have me do anything to make her happy, anything to see that gorgeous smile of hers.
You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
I saw her stumble out of the sea of students and she was panting with a silly grin on her face. Even with her obvious exhaustion, she still ran towards me with everything she had.
As she finally step foot on the pavement of the road, our gazes found each other and I held hers as she held mine. As she made two more steps on the ground, I saw something in her eyes that made panic.
She was crying.
Silent tears were making their way down her face and they didn't stop. Why was she crying? Did something happen? Was she hurt?
But all negative thoughts left my mind when I inspected the rest of her face, she was still smiling. The rays of the sun made her eyes glitter against her face; I've never seen her so happy before.
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
"BELLA!" A voice shrieked; breaking the moment we had shared. I looked to the side to see that it was one of Bella's friends; Angela. She looked horrified panicked.
I snapped my head back to find Bella now standing in the middle of the road; the same look on her face as Angela.
She was no longer looking at me, but to her side.
"EDWARD!!"
Once I heard Bella scream my name, I finally realized what was happening.
A blue van was skidding across the street, trying to stop itself but something was wrong. It was slowing down.
My body responded before my mind even processed through. I ran towards Bella; already half way till I could reach her. I was so close; I forced my legs to move faster. But it was no use.
I was too late.
I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave girl
I will not stand in your way
"BELLLAAA!!"
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no
At this point, the tears started to fall. I couldn't help it. Everything was coming back; the pain, the guilt—everything.
I knelt beside her, cradling her limp body against me. I gently turned her head to face mine.
"Bella? Bella? Please, oh god…please be alright! Bella!" I called out to her, hoping she'd open her eyes to look at me. One look—to tell me she was ok.
"Please Bella, I'm begging…don't leave me…" I rested my forehead against hers; softly pleading.
"Edward…" her eyes slowly opened.
"Bella! Thank God!!" tears still kept running down my cheeks but I attempted to smile. It looked bittersweet. "Someone get an ambulance!!" I yelled to the crowd that started to form around us. I didn't care about the attention, all I wanted was for Bella to be alright, I needed her to be alright.
"Edward…it hurts…" she cringed and cried out in pain.
"I know, Bella. It's ok…you'll be better soon, ok? Just hang on…please, love." Her eyes started to close again. "NO! Bella, open your eyes! You can't do this to me….you will be fine. You'll be better….and we can go back home….to Alice…Emmett…to everyone." Nothing stopped me from sobbing in front of her.
Her eyes were completely closed now. But a small smile made it to her face.
You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
"Edward…it's ok." She slowly said. She was trying to comfort me. Why?! She was the one in pain!
"No it's not—we'll be at the hospital soon, Carlisle can—"
"No, Edward. I can't…but it's ok." She tried to look at me again. "I have…something to tell you."
"What is it, Bella..?" Talking would keep her willing to fight the pain. She had to get through this, she just had to.
"I'm…I'm…" she looked like she wanted to finish what she was saying but stopped herself. She was crying now. She looked incredibly hurt.
"You're what, Bella?" I was worried now. What was so important that she had to tell me now?
Her hand reached up to touch my face. Trying to wipe the tears away; neglecting the ones that ran down from hers.
"I…I love you." Her hand fell from my face at the time her eyes fell closed.
"No! Bella, wait, please!...Bella? Wake up! WAKE UP!" I was practically yelling at her now. I didn't care, she had to hear me, she had to open her eyes. "This isn't funny! Ha-ha…ok, jokes on me…now wake up, love. Please...Bella…" I forced a smile through my tears.
When she didn't respond or move at all, I screamed; out of sadness, out of despair, out of pain and out of love.
I looked up, pouring everything out to the sky. I sang out the words to her. I was calling out to her. She would hear me.
I know that you'll be back girl
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhh
I know that, you'll be right back, babe
Ooooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time
"Edward, can I speak with you?" I was at the hospital now, Carlisle was there to handle it all, the tests, the paperwork—everything.
I was just sitting on one of the chairs. I haven't spoken a single word to anyone since I got here. How could I?...she was gone. How would I be able to do anything anymore?
I stood to let him know he had my attention, or at least whatever it was that made me still physically function. I was dead inside.
"Edward…I know you're having a really hard time right now… And I don't want to make matters any worse but I think you should know something…" Carlisle looked close to crying himself. Never have I seem my father look so dejected in all my life.
And what did he mean by "make matters any worse"?
You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
"How can this situation get ANY worse?! Bella just DIED. Nothing can possibly be worse!" I was angry now. I was upset at everything and everyone. How could this happen to Bella, of all people? She was perfect…she didn't deserve any of this.
"Edward, calm down!" his voice was firm. He wanted to remind me that we were still in a hospital.
"The hell I will! I don't want to listen to anything anyone has to say! Bella's gone and nothing will make that fact go away! I'm leaving!" I started to head towards the doors of the hospital until Carlisle stopped me.
"Edward!" he was angry as well now.
"WHAT?!" I looked back. I was sure my eyes portrayed what I was feeling.
His eyes softened as he spoke his next words. "…she was pregnant, Edward."
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my my baby...
She was pregnant, with my child. That's why she was crying that day as ran towards me. That's what she wanted to tell me. I've always dreamed of having children of my own. To be exactly like the parents Carlisle and Esme were to me; to care and love something unconditionally with all your heart.
After proposing to her, we would've gotten married, and would've had a family. I could have had everything I wanted—with her.
You'll always be a part of me (you will always be)
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on (we will linger on...)
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
As I sang to the cold night sky, I could feel her next to me; laying her head on my shoulder like she always had. I felt her love for me.
Always be my baby
I will see her again; someday. I was sure of it.
...? How was it? Hopefully you felt something while reading this. Tell me if you liked it!
Reviews only encourage me to write more! D
LOve you guys!--BudhaBeads