Disclaimer: I own nothing recognisable from the Harry Potter series, what's more, I am bloody infatuated with Sirius Black. o'v'o xxx It looks as if the fic is about Sirius' girlfriend but if you stay patient and read on, you'll see that she's just a complement through whom characterisation of Sirius is made.
Sirius Black the Boyfriend - Chapter 1
"Sirius!"
Sirius was walking towards the Entrance Hall with his friends when someone called nearby. Skeptical of being discovered, he turned sharply. To his relief, instead of any night-strolling Professor, standing a few feet away was only Star. He stared at her expectantly as if prompting her to say aloud whatever she desired to talk to him about. But Star didn't move an inch, nor did she utter a single word, it didn't take him long to realise that she wanted to speak to him in private.
James growled beside him impatiently when Sirius signalled his friends to wait for him.
"What's it?" said Sirius once he reached her, a bit too coolly.
"Sirius, you asked me to wait for you at nine tonight, remember?" Star whispered, clutching her robes inside the pockets to smooth her nerve. Sirius stared at her blankly for a moment and then the memory of promising Star a prolonged date hit him hard. But instead of feeling apologetic, annoyance was all he felt at the moment.
"Look," Sirius said, stroking a strand of her honey-brown hair tenderly, "I've got to go out with James and Peter, to meet Remus at Hogsmeade."
"Can I go with you?" she asked hopefully.
"No!" he rejected sharply, the look on his face almost scared her and he probably sensed it, for his expression then softened. "Another night, alright?"
"Another night…" Star echoed accusingly, but she looked away as if casually as the disappointment began to show, "…again. There's always another night."
Sirius watched as she bit her lips. And it suddenly struck him to perceive that Star had especially put on a light shade of make-up and her hair, which was usually straight, was now stylishly curly. It was obvious that she had put in effort to look best for their date.
"I promise I won't forget it this time, ok?" Sirius reached out to stroke her cheek briefly, and wrapped her in a loose embrace. Despite the indignation she had towards him just a moment ago, Star couldn't help melting to the stare, her heart skipped a beat as he leaned in. Their lips were only a few millimeters apart when James interrupted.
"Remus' waiting, Padfoot! Postpone the snogging session for a bit, can you?" He was tapping his foot urgently on the stone floor besides Peter. Star tried her best not to glare at him; as she knew perfectly that Sirius wouldn't approve of anything directed against his best friend.
Sirius pulled away and yelled back at James, with more signs of amusement than irritation, much to Star's distaste, "Sorry mate, one more moment." He turned back to Star, running his hand into his dark hair.
"I really gotta go," muttered Sirius, as he pecked her cheek instead. An awkward silence ensued. "I'll see you around," he said nonchalantly, before gesturing to his friends. When he opened the oak door to the complete darkness outside, he had almost instantaneously forgotten the existence of his girlfriend.
Star remained motionless when Sirius practically run to his friends and disappeared into the darkness beyond the Entrance Hall. He didn't even look back once or wave at her as she had hoped. She remained staring unseeingly at the space where Sirius had occupied for quite a few moments before closing her eyes. She couldn't deny she had felt a bit angry with him, for forgetting and abandoning her yet again for his friends, but the sense of longing soon took over that she couldn't stay mad.
She sighed heavily, before jogging back to the Ravenclaw common room. Walking through the open portrait, she progressed to her best friend directly. Toby was sitting alone at a far corner, doing her homework. She glanced up in surprise as Star bumped into the armchair besides hers moodily.
"Did Sirius fail to show up for your date again?" Toby asked carefully, to which Star waved her hand dismissively. "Gosh!"
"He couldn't help it. He just forgot," Star gave a pause, twirling her friend's idle sugar quill in her fingers dully, before she added with fake cheerfulness; "Anyway, he promised he will go out with me later."
Toby squinted at her in silence for a moment. "Star, has it ever occurred to you that he has been patronising you all along?"
"What do you mean?" said Star cautiously, she had a strange suspicion that she knew what's coming.
"I mean I know Sirius Black is good-looking and charming and brilliant and blah blah blah, but he doesn't treat you with the respect you deserve."
"Toby, we have had this conversation before, and you know this is not true," Star reminded her quickly, rushing to vindicate. "And he's not that kind of guys who makes a relationship high-profile."
Sensing Star's agitation, Toby knew she should have left the topic at that. And she considered keeping her thoughts to herself, but the sense of righteousness had soon got the better of her, and she so wanted to knock some sense into her friend. "Star, I really don't think Black is your Mr. Right."
"Thanks very much," said Star heatedly, "But whether he is or not is my own business, not yours."
"He just isn't," Toby reiterated firmly, "He is not even a decent guy. You know it! Everyone knows he is conceited and arrogant…Everybody knows he is brutal and not one to mess with unless they expect damages…If you ask me, he is hardly better than the worst of Slytherins…"
"Excuse me, he hates the Slytherins! That's an established fact. Could you please stop comparing him with the Slytherins!" Star interrupted in anger, her cheek rising in colour, "And don't you dare speak of Sirius like that! It's not as if you know him."
But Toby continued, as though there had been no interruption. "You have seen how he tortured the Slytherins just for his amusements! He lives in his own world with his friends, walking around knowing he's irresistible and-"
"What's wrong with you?" Star demanded hotly, launching out of the armchair and looking dangerous. They glared at each other with daggers, the other Ravenclaws looked over curiously but neither of them cared much. "He hasn't done anything to you! Why do you have to keep black-mouthing him?"
"It is you who has got a problem!" Toby sighed, she couldn't remember how many times they had argued about the topic but Star had continuously refused to accept the reality that Sirius wasn't genuine in dating her. "You are living in your own fantasy! When will you be ready to realise that Sirius Black doesn't like you?"
"SHUT UP!" Star yelled at her friend with every sign of contempt. She shot Toby one last dead glare before she stormed up the staircase to her dormitory. Slamming the door shut, she strode to her bed and fumbled over the opening of the curtain. Then all of a sudden she ripped the curtain off feverishly. She collapsed on the fluffy bed, hugging her legs and breathing hard, and gazed out from the window at the sparkling stars, her throat feeling tight and her orbits warm. She could remember everything from the very beginning.
Sirius Black had been one of the most popular, charming guys in Hogwarts. He was tall and overwhelmingly handsome, as the female population stated it simply. He had dark hair and fathomless blue eyes, and his rebellious aura that engulfed him had made him even more admirable, making every girl went weak at the knees. To put it simply, he was like the widely admired prince in the fairy tales.
Star must be just another girl to him, for he could have any girl he liked by just making a flirtatious wink. Undeniably, she was pretty, but not outstandingly so. There were probably some more gorgeous girls fancying Sirius. But nobody could have fancied Sirius for a longer time than Star had. She had fancied him from her first year and the crush remained for the years to come.
It was at the Quidditch pitch where he first noticed her. The Gryffindor team was practicing there when she sat at a far corner of the stadium peeking alone. Her eyes were glued to Sirius, they followed his every move. He flew very well and he was really adorable on the broomstick. Both being chasers, James Potter and he co-operated with each other astonishingly well, it was as if they shared some kindred spirits. And Sirius in particular could do all sorts of manoeuvres to save the trickiest passes of the Quaffle.
Star was simply too dazed to notice when a Bludger was flung in her way, speeding at roughly a thousand miles per second.
"Duck!" Someone yelled. She swivelled around, and before she knew it she was yanked out of harm's way drastically. In a flabbergasted shock, she watched as the Bludger hit the seat besides her instead and exploded before it zoomed off somewhere in the stadium.
"You okay?" A male's voice inquired.
Still haven't recovered from the initial shock, Star had completely ignored her saviour. When she turned to him, she was struck again harder than ever. It was Sirius Black kneeling besides her and looking at her. And she couldn't help noticing his face was extremely close, it was at a touchable distance.
On an impulse, she pushed him aside. Lucky for Sirius, with his Quidditch reflex he didn't fall over on the stand. Sirius just faltered slightly, stabled himself before observing her with raised brows at her in amusement.
For a few seconds, she couldn't breathe, let alone find her voice. The appearance of Sirius being so close was casting a kind of dazzling white light in front of her eyes. "I am sorry," she stuttered at last, growing hot in the cheek.
Sirius further scrutinised her for a moment when she turned all bashful, looking away because she couldn't meet his too-velvety eyes. He must have known she was fancying him right from the beginning. She could tell and she was embarrassed, but somehow his not-too-surprised manner told her he was very much used to this kind of admiration.
"I am really sorry," Star muttered incoherently, "I didn't mean to push you away."
"It's okay," said Sirius easily, getting up. Then he shot up in the air again.
Star peered in stunned motionlessness as the Gryffindor Team gathered around him. It seemed that Sirius was giving them a strategic lecture before calling it a day. She remained in her seat, angry at herself for not grasping the invaluable opportunity to get to know him in profiles. She waited until they were all gone before she decided to leave.
However, despite the self-rebuke, she was still in hysteria when she got up and walked to the entrance of the stadium. And much to her shock and agitation, Sirius was at the other side of the entrance doors when she walked through them. He was leaning besides the doorframe, his hands in the pockets, staring up thoughtfully at the sky before he turned and stared at her, a smile forming on his handsome face. "Hey," he said casually, making his way towards her.
Star could feel her face growing hot; she must have been as red as an apple as she answered in a barely-audible whisper, "Oh, hi!"
"Sirius Black." he extended a hand charismatically, which she shook hesitantly. "Star. Star Lyttelton."
"So you're the Ravenclaw," said Sirius carelessly as he loosened the collar strings of his Quidditch robes as if they bothered him. Star gasped surreptitiously; she had once intentionally bumped into him in the corridor, as dared by Toby and her other friends. It delighted her that he seemed to remember that encounter. But she couldn't find an appropriate response.
"So Star," Sirius said obliviously, disintegrating the excruciating silence. "What do you think of our practice?" Star could see him sweating a bit, but he appeared somehow even more adorable to her.
"It's excellent," Star complimented, forgetting about loyalty to her own house and quickly recalling from her memory shattered bits of Quidditch Through The Ages, which she had read for like a thousand times as she thought it might come in handy one day. She made some professional comments on the performance of his team while they chatted all the way back to the castle and he looked quite bewildered by her knowledge.
"Star?" Sirius grasped her wrist, stopping her from entering the bluish chamber. He had accompanied her back to the Ravenclaw Common Room and they had already wished each other goodnight. Staring at his hand with bewilderment, she managed to say, "Yes?"
"I was thinking since there'll be a Hogsmeade visit on next Saturday, why don't we go together?" Sirius was saying nonchalantly. She couldn't quite believe her ears; for a moment she just gawked at her luck, and she suspected that she was having a very nice dream.
But she didn't need any advice to grasp any chance being alone with him, be it in dreams or in reality. And so she nodded passionately, "That'd be nice."
"So, see you then," Sirius waved her goodbye with a little lop-sided seducing smile playing on his lips, his broomstick on his shoulder.
They had started dating a month after their first rendezvous. Being asked out by Sirius must be the luckiest thing that had ever happened to her. But actually dating him was not as felicitous as she had imagined. Of course Star still liked to be with Sirius, but at the same time, one could say he had led her a melancholy life.
When she later thought about it again, she must admit that she had made the biggest mistake at the very beginning; she had demonstrated her crazy affection for him and that she'd go without limits to please and satisfy him. And that very mistake had planted seeds for the unbalanced relationship.
Star was very afraid of him. Sirius was cold and distant in his behaviour, self-confident and commanding. And he didn't seem to be at all enthusiastic about the relationship at times. As Star concluded, he couldn't afford to spare much time for her, as his real interest lay on pranks and Quidditch. To him, she was nothing more than an easy date, who's always reserved and might be called upon whenever he liked. Star had kept reminding herself that it's not the truth, that he in fact wasn't treating her merely as an easy date, but it had shown its grounds the previous year when Sirius got into a quarrel with his friends.
Due to some incident that Sirius had never explained to her in detail, he had landed in a month of detentions and in addition to that, made his friends indignant of him. In the month to ensue, Sirius had spent basically every hour with her, she sneaked into serving detentions with him and they stayed together in the Room of Requirement. It was the most jubilant peak in their relationship, but it didn't last long. Sirius reconciled with James, Remus and Peter shortly afterwards, Star was grateful for that but she couldn't help feeling frustrated as she was degraded as a second choice again. Nevertheless, however little attention he paid her, she still loved him as fiercely as a wild fire.
A curious influence Sirius had over Star, and curious were the relations between them. He took hardly any interest in her condition, but he never hurt her feelings, not intentionally at least; he respected her freedom, he treated her - if she may so express it - with courtesy...only he never let her be really close to him. Star loved him, she admired him, Sirius was her ideal of a person - and how passionately devoted she should've been to him, if she hadn't been continually conscious of his holding her off!
When he liked, Sirius could almost instantaneously, by a single word, a single gesture, call forth an unbounded confidence in him. Her soul expanded... then he as suddenly got rid of her, and again he was keeping her off, gently and affectionately, but still he kept her off.
Tonight was just another night that Sirius kept her off and spent with his friends. Just another night, so what's there to be blubbered about?
Star wiped her eyes with the sleeves and leaned back on her bed. She lay awake in the private of the curtains throughout the entire night, secretly wishing that Sirius might drop in after his adventure with his friends. But of course, except in her musing, Sirius hadn't made any appearance.
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