Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever own Trigun or anything affiliated with said show.

"Speaking"

'Thoughts'

Don't Bite Off More Than You Can Chew

"VASH, GET YOUR DOUGHNUT LUVIN ASS BACK HERE!!" Meryl screamed, as she chased the man known as the Humanoid Typhoon around the mansion they were currently staying at. "I KNOW YOU STOLE MY LUNCH!" She yelled when she spotted a flash of red heading around a corner.

"I didn't eat it, I swear!" Vash said frightened, as he found a space to crawl into.

Unfortunately, he'd been dropping crumbs and had ended up leaving a trail right to his hiding place, a trail which Meryl had been thrilled to find. Seeing his spiked hair sticking out of a box, she smirked evilly. Quietly, so as not to alert her prey, Meryl slowly stalked up to his hiding place. When she was finally within range, she pounced. Grabbing Vash by his collar, she pulled him out of the box he was cowering in and started walking down the hall, dragging him behind her while he protested his innocence.

"Honest." He whined. "I didn't touch your food. 'But if I did, I'd tell you never to buy the ham and cheese again. Nasty.'" Vash said the last part under his breath.

Luck was not on his side today though, because Meryl heard it. Her eyes flashed with anger and she clenched her fist. "I knew it!" She said shaking her head. "Why do you always steal my food?" She asked exasperated.

Vash smiled up at her innocently. "Because your food always taste's so much better than mine."

Sighing, Meryl dropped the infuriating man to the floor. "I don't know why I put up with you Vash the Stampede." Looking at him straight in the eyes, she glared menacingly. "But if you ever touch my food again I guarantee you'll be sorry." She said, shaking her fist at him.

Gulping, Vash watched as she walked away. 'I think she was truly mad at me this time.' He thought. 'Better be sneakier about it next time.' Grinning stupidly, he walked off planning his next meal heist.

ooooo

The next day Vash was at it again. He was waiting patiently, well at least as patiently as he could, for Meryl to leave her food unprotected. Seeing her leave to go to the kitchen, he grinned. 'Now's my chance.' He thought happily, as he quickly ran in and swiped the sandwich from her plate. 'I'd better find a place to hide before she comes back.' He thought, as he absentmindedly took a bite. Suddenly his eyes widened and began to water. Swallowing the bite quickly, he opened his mouth and began chanting. "Water! Water! Water! I need water now!" He said as he dropped the food and started fanning his mouth with his hands. Running around the room like a chicken with its head cut off, he finally found some water and promptly guzzled the whole glass. "KYAAAAAAAAH!!" He screamed, as his tongue just seemed to get even hotter. Seeing Meryl walk in with a smirk on her face, Vash got worried. "Wha's goig on, haw ome iths ot orking?" He asked, holding his tongue out of his mouth.

"Because, hot sauce gets even hotter when you add water to it." Meryl replied haughtily, as she crossed her arms.

"Ot hauce?" He asked, still holding onto his tongue.

Meryl just shook her head and began to laugh. "Hahaaahhaaa! I told you you'd be sorry if you ever touched my food. Now look at you."

He did look rather funny with one hand holding his tongue out of his mouth while the other fanned it, all the while running back and forth around the room. Nodding her head at a job well done, Meryl left Vash to deal with his dilemma. 'Maybe now he'll think twice before he eats anything of mine again.' She thought smiling. Leaving him on his own, Meryl headed back into the kitchen so she could get her actual lunch. She had worked up quite an appetite with all that laughing.