Here's To The Night

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. I don't own any of the characters in this story. It is for entertainment purposes only.

Summary: One Shot RLHG. They have one night together, but will it be enough? Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry.

Cleaned up for Grammar Errors on November 12, 2005

Total Word Count: 1,961

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Here's To The Night

So denied, so I lied,

Are you the now or never kind?

In a day and a day love,

I'm gonna be gone for good again.

Are you willing to be had?

Are you cool with just tonight?

Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well

Here's to the nights we felt alive
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry
Here's to goodbye
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon

Put your name on the line.

Along with place and time.

Wanna stay, not to go,

I wanna ditch the logical.

Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well

Here's to the nights we felt alive
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry
Here's to goodbye
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon

All my time is froze in motion

Can't I stay an hour or two or more
Don't let me let you go

Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well

Here's to the nights we felt alive
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry
Here's to goodbye
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon

Performed by Eve 6

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Hermione felt eyes on her as she glanced out over the starry skies. Her skin prickled with a sensual feeling. She knew who was watching her even before she turned from the window. She had felt him watching her for days. "Remus." she said gently.

He stepped up beside her when she spoke. The turned his gaze out over the stars as well. "What are you doing up so late Hermione?" he asked gently.

"I couldn't sleep. I am worried." she replied, the fear clear in her voice.

Remus turned to look at her. "Don't be." his voice sounded calmer.

"Harry hasn't seemed himself since Ron died. He's lost so many people. I don't know how to help him anymore." she paused for only a moment. "It will be worse when you leave."

"You've lost Ron as well, you need to worry about how you're doing." Remus said gently. "Harry is like his father, very strong, he'll be okay."

"Do you know what it is like to be only eighteen and have never known your parents, lost the only father figure you had ever had, and then your best friend?" Hermione snapped, turning back to the window.

After a moment of silence, she sighed. "I'm sorry. I just feel frustrated. Things are so difficult right now, and I feel so alone."

"Don't be sorry. You are fine, I understand how you feel." Remus reassured her.

They stood together for a few moments in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Hermione bit her lip before turning to him once more.

"Are you really going to France?" she asked.

"Yes." he said.

"It won't be the same without you here Remus." Hermione said, her voice soft.

"I won't feel the same not being here, but I have to go. This is my only chance at finding a cure." he said.

"But they don't even know if it will work or if you are endangering your life by going. You heard Dumbledore, if it doesn't cure you, the treatment will kill you." she cried out.

"It's worth finding out though Hermione. I have to find out. I can't live my life like this anymore. The risk is worth it to me." he explained.

"We will miss you." she said, keeping her eyes out the window. She could feel Remus turn to her, his gaze burning her.

"I know." he said.

"I'll miss you." she whispered.

"I know." he replied again.

She turned then, wondering how they got to be standing so close together. His eyes met hers, and an unspoken realization went through them both.

"We can't do this." he protested, even as his head dropped lower to hers.

"I know." she said, a small grin on her face.

"You are too young" he said, his breath warm on her face.

"I'm eighteen." she replied, putting her hand around his neck.

"We can't." he said, and then he pressed his lips to hers. Their bodies pressed close together, their lips tasting and caressing.

He ran his tongue along her lips, opening her mouth to taste her. Dipping in and out, feeling her tongue against his.

After what seemed like minutes, he pulled away, breathing heavy. She was breathing heavy as well; her nightgown was clinging to her where the sweat had started to form on her body. "I've wanted to do that for days." he finally said.

"Me too." she replied, leaning up to him once more. Their lips met again, and Remus lifted her gently, pressing her against the cool glass window. She wrapped her legs around his waist for balance, as his hands reached up to tangle in her hair. "Let's go upstairs." she whispered in his ear.

He nodded and turned from the room, carrying her up to his bedroom. Once the door was locked, he turned back to her. She turned her face up, ready for his kiss. "Hermione…" he started.

She opened her eyes. "Yes?" she said gently.

"You know that even if we do this, I still have to leave. I still have to go to France and try this cure." he said.

The hurt flashed through her eyes briefly before she smiled at him. "I understand that Remus. It's okay. I'll be here when you get back." she said.

"What if I don't come back Hermione?" he said.

"Remus, everyone cares about you even if you are a werewolf, none of us feel that you need to go through with this. I love you for who you are, not what you could be." she said, before blushing. Had she just said love?

He felt his heart double beat. Did she mean that? He sighed. This was something he had to do though.

He pulled her close to him, his hand on either side of her face. "I have to go Hermione. For me. I care about you so much. I would go as far as to say I have fallen in love with you. You need to understand that I am still going to France, and I may not come back. Are you willing to do this knowing that? Are you willing to stay with me tonight, knowing I will leave possibly for good tomorrow?"

She looked at him, tears in her eyes. Instead of answering him, she reached up and lifted her nightgown over her head, tossing it to the corner.

He gazed at her, feeling the heat rise in his body, as he pulled her tight against him, running his hands down her smooth back.

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Remus pulled her naked body closer to his own as they snuggled together. He nuzzled her ear. "Do you regret it?" he asked.

"Never." she said.

He kissed her forehead gently, listening to her breath mellow out as she slept. He lay there for a long time, knowing this might be the only time he could hold her. Her words rang in his ear. 'I love you for who you are, not what you could be.' Did he really have to go to France? He knew he had to, or he would never be happy with himself.

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She woke up first the next morning, the sunlight burning her eyes. She sighed as she snuggled into his embrace, feeling the hair on his chest tickle her back, his warm breath on her neck.

She rolled over to face him, kissing his nose lightly. "Remus.." she whispered.

He slowly opened his eyes, smiling when he saw she was still in his arms. "Hi.." he said.

"Hi…" she replied, blushing.

He kissed her lips softly. "It's almost noon." she said.

He looked over at the clock. "Yes it is."

"Your supposed to be there at noon." she said, tears beginning to well up as she let go of him.

"Oh Hermione, don't let me go. Please…" he said, tears beginning were in his own eyes.

"Stay then. Please?" she pleaded." I don't care that you are a werewolf Remus. I don't want you to go to France. I want you to stay with me."

"Don't you understand Hermione? I'll never be happy with myself unless I try this. I know it's risking my life, but I am not happy with my life the way it is. I don't want to stay here with you and worry that once a month I am going to try and rip you to shreds. If this works, I can be happy with myself, and happy with us." he tried to explain.

"I don't understand it. Isn't my love enough?" she asked, childish innocence shinning in her brown eyes.

"No, it's not. I have to love myself before I can let you love me." he said, quickly standing up and reaching a hand down to her. She stood and they got dressed in the quiet of morning.

"I'll come back. I promise. We'll be together, and I won't have to be locked in a cage once a month." he said

"You have to come back. I can't lose you. I already lost Sirius and Ron. I won't be able to handle losing you." she said.

"I need to go. I said goodbye last night to everyone else. I hate goodbyes. There will be no goodbyes between us." he said.

She clung to him as the tears leaked out of both their eyes. He kissed her softly before reaching in his pocket and pulling out a locket. "This was my mothers. I want you to keep it." he raised his wand and waved it over the locket. Words formed, engraved in the back.

She gently took it, reading what he had just engraved. "Here's to the night?" she read, looking up at him.

He kissed her. "Here's to the night we shared. I promise, I'll be back and we will share many more."

She nodded, putting the locket around her neck. "I love you. Goo…" she said.

"I love you too Hermione. Remember there are no goodbyes, I'll be back. I promise." he interrupted her, kissing her once more before disappearing from her arms.

She threw herself down on the bed, tears pouring down her cheeks. She tried to tell herself he would be back before she knew it.

She looked down at his locket, and was surprised to see the words he had engraved changed. "An enchanted engraving, very clever" she murmured, before reading what it said. "Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry." She smiled.

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3 Months Later

Hermione felt Tonks holding her. She felt the older woman's arm around her shoulder, but her mind couldn't comprehend it. Her eyes couldn't see it.

All her eyes could see was his casket lying above the fresh dug ground. All her mind could comprehend was his promise to come back to her. 'Why did he go!' she silently screamed. Why did he have to risk it? Tears poured down her face. She never said goodbye. She had believed him when he said he would come back.

He hadn't said goodbye, she hadn't said goodbye.

The tears fell from her pale cheeks to land on her neck and chest. She felt the cool gold of the locket burn against her skin for a moment, and she reached down to lift it up, surprised to see the words changed again.

She sobbed as she read his last message. "Here's to goodbye.."

FIN