So, this one shot came about one day when I was thinking that James probably one day got so sick of Sirius taking the piss out of his hair that he just shaved it off, they'd have been drunk and he'd have died at their reactions, because although Sirius takes the piss, James knows Sirius would never touch a hair on his own head. This is Lily's response to the new hair cut.
As soon as Lily had closed the car door, it had pulled away from the curb, no goodbye, no hug, nothing. She felt her heart sting in her chest. This was the first and only time she'd be dropped off for the Hogwarts express without her mother by her side, the thought brought the sting of tears that she had so hoped would stop forming. She'd done nothing but cry for the past two weeks. Her mother had been ill, she'd known that but her passing had still come as a shock and as such had sent Lily's life into a mass of disarray.
But she was here, ready for her seventh year of Hogwarts. She'd only had one moment of hesitation when deciding whether to return but had quickly dismissed it, she had nothing left tying her to the muggle world, not really. Only Petunia and she hated her anyway, pretended she didn't exist now that their mother was no longer there desperately trying to have them make amends.
So here she was, dragging her trunk through the busy station, through the wall between Platforms 9 and 10 until she found the scarlet engine before her.
This platform was busier than the others she had passed to get here. There were children and parents everywhere, talking loudly, laughing, crying, creatures squawking only adding to the raucous that was 'goodbyes' between families and 'hellos' between friends.
Although it was manic and loud and wholly overwhelming, Lily felt at peace for the first time in two weeks, her heart lifted some in the warmth that flowed so freely about the platform.
"Lily!" It was Dorcas running through the mass of bodies, no bags or anything just herself and as she reached Lily she flung her arms about her, causing Lily to drop her own bags to the ground. "Oh Lily! You look wonderful as per usual. You know we've been waiting for an age for you to turn up. I thought that maybe you'd finally murdered that sister of yours and were on your way to some muggle prison. Don't worry we'd have broken you out in no time. I mean even the marauder's were beginning to make plans on how they'd get you out I mean it would-."
"Dorcas! Shut up." Lily told her, pulling back and holding her at arms length. "I'm. Fine." She told her seriously, making sure each syllable rang clear.
Dorcas grinned guiltily and shrugged her shoulders. "I was worried. Sorry." She told her and then took up Lily's elbow, grabbed one of the bags from the floor and began pulling Lily along the platform.
"We've already got a compartment sorted so you can dump your bags, get changed, go to the heads meeting and come back and catch up." Dorcas spieled off as they walked before helping haul Lily's trunk up onto the train.
"Organised as ever Dor." Lily said, genuinely pleased that somebody was, because Lily had never felt more disorganised for the start of term, though she did have a terrific excuse. She hadn't read any of her books, done no preparations for lessons as had been advised, didn't even know who her counterpart was to be for Head boy.
"Have you heard who head boy is?" She asked, hoping that perhaps someone knew.
"No, Sorry Lils. I guess you'll just have to find out when you get to the meeting." Dorcas told her as she guided Lily into a compartment. Within the small, cosy compartment was Mary and Marlene who were sat in varying degrees of lethargy, copies of Witch Weekly lay open in laps as they chatted.
They greeted Lily on entry and began discussing the end of their summers and their final year ahead.
"I should go get changed and to the Heads compartment." Lily told the girls, standing from her seat and grabbing her robes and pulling them over the uniform she was already wearing.
The carriages were as bustling as ever, filled to the brim, laughter poured around her with each step she took, making her way to the front carriage. The whole way down the train she was met with friendly faces that congratulated her on her headship, gave their condolences for her loss but in general it only still uplifted her mood. The sense of home, of family, grew the further down the train she went, the closer that the train got to Hogwarts.
The heads compartment itself was larger than the other, with a brass sign on the sliding door that announced it for what it was. Stepping inside the compartment Lily took a deep breath, it was empty for the moment and she couldn't help but ponder who the head boy would be. Remus? But he'd have written her to tell her. And he was the only viable option from Gryffindor. Diggory or Mathews could have made the cut from Hufflepuff but she really couldn't imagine Amos mucking up his carefully crafted image and Mathews was quite dim. Any off the four Ravenclaw boys would be ok, but she didn't believe that Dumbledore would force any of them on her, she'd often found herself in heated arguments with any one of them. Snape was the only candidate that would be considered and she prayed that it wouldn't be him she'd have to face now. They hadn't spoken since the end of fifth year.
There was a rattle behind her and the door slid open, Lily turned to find a tall figure before her, one she honestly didn't recognise for all of ten seconds. He was taller than she remembered, his dark skin the only real hint of what she remembered from the summer. His eyes were behind a new pair of glasses, bigger and thicker framed, but it was the clear absence of his once overwhelming mass of hair that had caused Lily's amnesia.
James Potter stood before her with…a buzz cut and shiny badge attached to his robes.
"Lily! Wait…you're head girl?" He asked in confusion, his face scrunching up and his hand falling to his buzzed head as though there was still hair to run it through, it fell uselessly to his side.
There was a beat of silence as they stared at one another in the doorway of the compartment. Lily didn't feel the burning embarrassment that she had thought she would feel after kissing him not once, but four times over the summer holidays and not replying to any of his owls after their fourth. Instead she felt nothing, if you could count butterflies roiling around your stomach nothing.
"The real question here is where is your hair?!" Lily's voice came out higher than usual. She took a step forward and reached her hand up to run it through the short bristles on the side of his head, it was soft, softer than it looked.
"Oh-well it was…stupid." He said bashfully, his dark cheeks colouring in a way that Lily couldn't get used to.
"Who did it?" Lily asked dropping her hand from his head, the feeling of the soft hair still tingling against her fingers.
"Me." James replied a stupid grin on his face as he looked down at Lily.
"Why?" She exclaimed crossing her arms across her chest in an attempt to stop her fingers reaching out to his buzz cut once more.
"Long story." He muttered stuffing his hands into the pockets of his trousers.
"We've got a long journey ahead of us." She told him raising her eyebrows.
"We've got to prepare for the meeting." He told her seriously and moved past her and into the large compartment again rubbing his hand along his head out of habit.
"Yes! Right, um…I really didn't even think about this." She told him honestly watching as he took a seat and began pulling out pieces of parchment with scrawling handwriting across it.
"And you've been to these every year for the past two years!" He said with a laugh before he gestured her to join him at the table.
Lily made her way over, guilt washing over her.
"I'm joking." He told her with a roll of his eyes. "You-you've got nothing to worry about. What you've been through…well you needn't worry. I'm pretty sure I've got everything covered. I asked Remus and he seemed to think so." He was talking fast, his eyes avoiding hers as she watched him closely.
"Sorry I never wrote you back." Lily told him after a moment of silence.
James waved his hand about as though shooing her apology away from him.
"Don't apologise."
"Why? It was rude of me." Her heart constricted some as she recalled the countless letters he'd sent her asking about the kiss, about them, what it all meant, and then it was condolences and apologies. And she hadn't replied to a single one.
"No. I can't begin to imagine…what you went through." He shook his head, forehead creasing in pain.
Lily couldn't speak, he was right in front of her apologising for writing her condolences for the death of her mother. It had been two weeks. It was still raw and she could feel the burning of tears and the honeyed gaze of James Potter.
"Why did you cut your hair?" She choked out compulsively, her hands gripping the other tightly in an attempt to hold herself together.
"What?" James sounded completely dumbfounded at her random question.
"Just tell me." She told him quietly looking down at the worn wooden table they were sat at.
"Well…Padfoot dared me to cut it. Not this short I don't think but it seemed funny at the time. I was drunk and the thought of going back into the room without all my hair had in stitches so…I did it." He chuckled and lifted a hand again to his head rubbing his palm roughly along the bristles.
Lily laughed too, the burning sensation of tears had disappeared and she looked up to meet James' gaze.
"You look so different." She told him, her eyes wandering all over his face.
"In a bad way? Mum almost cried when she saw me."
"No, you look…good. Now you look like the bad boy you used to act like." She told him smiling.
He grinned back at her and reached out to run his fingers over a strand of hair that had fallen from her ponytail.
"Ask me." Lily murmured feeling his knuckles graze along her cheek.
"What?" James asked watching her carefully.
"Ask me what you asked in your letters." She whispered, shuffling herself closer to him on the bench, her thigh pressing against his own.
"Lily…go out with me." He said in a hushed tone.
"That wasn't what you asked in the letter." She told him, smiling gently as he rolled is eyes at her.
"I want to kiss you. Can I kiss you again?" He asked her leaning further forward, his neck bending so that his face was level with hers.
"Yes." She whispered placing a hand on his thigh as she leant forward to meet his lips.
He was warm and gentle as he kissed her, soft pecks that deepened only when Lily opened her mouth and placed her other hand on the side of his face. The sorrow was there but somehow it seemed to be less agonising when she kissed James. He helped to fill the hole in her heart. It constricted tightly as she felt James' tongue against her own, his hand grasping the back of her neck and holding her against him. Lily allowed her hand to move up James' face until it was on his scalp, her nails gently scraping the buzz cut causing James to groan gently into her mouth. He pulled away, placing his forehead against hers and breathing deeply, his eyes were closed as he mumbled happily.
"Lils you have no idea-I-I…" His words trailed away and Lily couldn't help the grin that filled her face.
She initiated the kiss again, the hand on his thigh moving further up his leg as she pressed herself closer to him, causing James to groan louder this time, so loud that it almost drowned out the rattling of the sliding door.
"Oh god." Remus muttered turning away and laughing loudly. "Padfoot will not believe this!" He shouted and disappeared from view, obviously running down the train to find Sirius.
"Shit." James said quickly, attempting to pull himself away from Lily.
"Where are you going?" Lily asked grabbing hold of his hand as he stood.
"To tell that knob to shut the fuck up."
"Don't." Lily mumbled tugging on his hand until he sat down again.
"You sure? You have no idea the shit we're going to have to endure." James warned cupping her cheek in his palm.
"I don't care." Lily said quickly with a shrug of her shoulders and was caught completely off guard this time by James kissing her.
"Merlin's scrotum it finally happened." Sirius shouted and Lily didn't even pull her lips from James as she lifted her hand and flipped Sirius off.
"And where the hell is your other hand at Miss Head Girl?"At that Lily felt James' hand leave her face and she knew without looking that he too was giving Sirius the middle finger.