Vet Visit

Any waiting room is long suffering for any human being. This was the thought that was currently in Hachiman's head as he flipped through a magazine with his cat sitting peacefully on his lap. They were waiting at the vet's office because lately his cat been throwing up a lot and his sister was worried he might have eaten something he shouldn't have. Hachiman considers himself and his sister responsible pet owners and did their best in avoid bringing in or leaving anything that could be harmful to the beloved cat but sometimes these things happen. For now, all he could do is wait for the vet to see them and it wasn't all bad since so far he was the only one in the waiting room and it was quiet.

However that didn't last long when the front door opened and another pet owner came in. Hachiman's eyes widen, immediately recognizing the blonde hair and happy-go-luck smile. Hayato came in with a leash and was followed by a cute brownish puppy bouncing along his feet. His cat tensed up on his lap and Hachiman knew the feeling was mutual. Hayato was surprised to see him there too and flashed his usual friendly smile, which Hachiman returned with a small, forced one. He and his cat watched observantly as Hayato and his puppy went to sign in. The secretary at the desk blushed and smiled at the young teen as he explained about getting his new puppy it's shots. Hachiman huffed to himself.

'A dog, huh? How fitting for a crowd pleaser idiot to chose a crowd pleasing mutt.' He thought. His cat made an annoyed sound and he patted his head to soothe both of them. Hayato returned and sat across from him, his puppy sniffing the ground and chairs, taking in the new environment it was in. Hachiman quickly tried to return to his magazine, preferring to avoid any small talk Hayato will try to start up.

"I didn't take you as an animal person, Hikitani." The blonde said towards him. Hachiman's left eyebrow twitched at the annoying nickname chosen for him. He nodded and kept reading along; giving the impression that he was in no mood to try and act nice. His cat made another noise only this time he sounded sick again. Hachiman petted he's back trying to soothe whatever pain the poor thing was suffering. Hayato looked sympathetic at his cat, "Aw, it sounds sick." Hachiman nodded again, "Y-yeah. I think he ate something weird at home." Hayato smiled softly, "What's it name?" he asked. Hachiman glanced at him, "Kamakura," he answered. He than glanced down at the puppy who had trolled over to him and sniffed at his shoes.

Hayato chuckled, "Isn't she cute? I just found her last week abandon in a cardboard box near my house. My parents said it was fine to keep her. I'm just here to get her checked out and get all her shots." He explained even though Hachiman didn't ask and looked uninterested.

"How very noble of you," Hachiman said sarcastically. Hayato ignored that and just kept smiling politely. Suddenly his puppy started barking excitedly which made both Hachiman and his cat jump up in their sits. The puppy jumped on her back hind legs and tried to get on Hachiman's lap, which freaked out his cat who quickly crawled on Hachiman's shoulders that lead to scratching him by fright.

Hayato quickly got up and scooped up his puppy and apologized as she kept barking at Hachiman's cat. "Sorry, sorry! I think this is her first time seeing a cat!" he apologized again. Hachiman frowned and tried to pull his cat off his shoulders but the poor thing was still spooked and it didn't help that the puppy was still barking at him. Hayato tried his best hush her up but the puppy wouldn't stop and kept trying to wiggle out of his arms to play with the strange creature across the room.

Finally the vet came out of the back room to call Hachiman and his cat. The teen gladly leaped out of his seat and rushed out the room so the vet can help pry his cat off his neck! After getting his cat to calm down, the vet checked him out and explained he must have gotten into some plants from outside. He advised Hachiman to inspect his yard for any weeds or plants that can get his cat sick. Hachiman nodded and the vet gave him some medicine to give to his cat every night until he starts acting like his normal self. Hachiman thanked him for all his help and cradled his pet out the office. After paying the bill he sighed and hoped Hayato and his puppy wasn't still there. He carefully exit back to the waiting room and was relieved to find that they weren't.

"Hikitani!" Hachiman cringed, 'Should have known. ' He thought bitterly. Both him and his cat looked behind them to see Hayato and his puppy. Hayato was holding her in one arm and in the other a big bag of puppy food. "How did everything go? Is you're cat gonna be alright?"

Hachiman nodded, "He'll be fine after taking some medicine. Your dog…?" he trailed off and Hayato smiled and nodded, "Yeah she's fine. She cried a little during the shots but was so brave, wasn't she? Yes she was!" he cooed at the animal and the dog barked happily as if she understood him. Hachiman smirked a little. "She is a little cute." He admitted and walked away. However Hayato trailed after him and started talking about what to name her and asking if there were any good pet stores around.

"I'm kind of a new pet owner since my parents never had any animals around when I was younger. I did all my research when I first got her but I guess there still some things I'm naïve to." Hayato smiled sheepishly.

'That's not the only thing you're naïve to,' Hachiman thought but decided not to say that. Instead he said, "The only pet store I know about is the one at the nearby mall. But cats are the only animals I have knowledge about. You should ask Yuigahama for advice since she has a dog too."

Hayato nodded before looking at the cat that was half asleep in Hachiman's arms. He than looked at Hachiman again and chuckled. Hachiman raised an eyebrow, "What?" Hayato chuckled again, "It's kind of stupid to say…but I think you're cat looks a little like you."

Hachiman paused and looked away, "That is stupid. He's too fat,"

Hayato laughed even more.

Coffee shop AU

"Dude, 5 bucks says that guy got stood up. He's been sitting there for 20 minutes so far." Kakeru said in a not so quiet voice to his best friend/co-worker, Hayato. The other male elbowed him for being so rude but looked over at the individual all his co-workers were gossiping about. The young man was a new customer and had come in here earlier and asked if a young lady wearing a blue rose in her hair came in yet. He himself was average height, skinny, short blackish green hair with a cowlick, but what very set him apart were those dead set and tired eyes and sullen expression. Hayato heard one of his female co-works saying he had "dead fish eyes".

Hayato couldn't help but feel sorry for the poor guy and a bit disgusted at all the workers for just assuming things. Maybe it wasn't a date and he was just waiting for a friend and that they were running late. The guy certainly didn't look worried since he was reading a book he had brought along and minding his own business. Still, he hasn't ordered anything yet and probably trying to wait for who ever is suppose to show up.

'I hope they show up soon though.' Hayato thought as he watched the guy check his phone again for the fifth time. About an hour later the guy got tired and packed up to leave and Kakeru won 5 bucks. The guy checked his phone and looked around once again, Hayato frowned at the snickering behind him by the other workers. The guy sighed once again and got up to leave, which was Hayato's cue to grab the cup of coffee he had on standby, and quickly made his way over to the other guy. The guy looked up as Hayato approached him and held out the coffee at him with a bright smile, "It's on the house, sir." He said cheerfully.

The guy narrowed his eyes and studied him, Hayato suddenly felt nervous. The guy was staring at him like he was looking right through his intentions and reading all his thoughts and movements as if he was an open book. Hayato cleared his throat and nudge the coffee towards him again, trying to keep up the polite smile. Finally, the guy opened his mouth and stated, "I don't like hot drinks."

Hayato felt his smile drop for a second before pulling it back and apologized, "Ah sorry. What about an ice coffee or ice tea?" he offered and quickly added, "Don't worry, I'll tell my boss to take it out of my pay."

The guy didn't look grateful but instead crossed his arms and looked at Hayato as if he was scum on the ground. "What do you take me for, some charity case?" he scowled, "Don't think I haven't heard a word you're co-workers have been saying about me being stood up."

Hayato winced, so he have been listening. Before he could apologize for his co-workers the guy spoke again, "You're worst out of all of them." The blonde felt his entire body freeze at that comment. The worst? No one has ever called him that before? What did he do? All he was trying to do was to make the guy feel better!

"You probably think offering me free coffee will heal whatever bad feelings I must be having right now. Truth is, I been stood up so many times that the feeling is numbed and boring." He stated this out loud as if it was something to be proud of. Hayato was lost with this guy. "You probably think of you're self as some big shot who never been through any hardships and been offered everything on a silver plate. I bet the only reason you're working here at this crappy shop is to build you're resume letter to whatever big company you plan on applying and all you're friends just followed like the flocks of sheep that they are. You're the guy every woman wants and every guy wants to be and to keep up this role model image you created for yourself you decide to jump in and rescue anyone you see as inferior to you just for the sake of making you're self look good. Sure, you may think you're doing out of pure good will but really, it's just an impulse drive to make you look and feel better about your own self. Again, the biggest fakes are the worst."

With all that said, the guy plucked the coffee cup out of Hayato's bewildered hand and left the store smoothly and quietly. The store was quiet for a moment, both customers and workers looking at Hayato who stood still looking stunned. Kakeru carefully walked over to him and patted on his back, "Dude, don't listen to that jerk. He's just pissed about being stood up. Just forget about him, ok?" Other co-workers and customers nodded and tossed Hayato compliments and encouragements. Hayato nodded slowly and than went back to work and smiling brightly.

Still, those dead fish eyes that looked into his soul with disgust and spoke at him with a sharp tongue. No one has ever spoke to him like that before and hit about every nail about him with out even knowing him! It was creepy and insulting for Hayato but at the same time intriguing and inspiring. It was like as if the guy was telling him, through all the insults, to better himself first before trying to help others. What good will come out of helping a broken heart if your own heart was rotten? Hayato stayed up all night thinking over his life and the words dead fish eyes guy said.

'I should have asked for his name first.' Hayato thought tiredly as he dragged himself out of bed the next morning. The walk towards the coffee shop felt heavy and empty to Hayato when he realized he would never see that guy again. It should be a good thing since the guy was so rude but the blonde didn't think he did it out of spite. The rest of the morning was dragged on and more than ever did Hayato wish the day would hurry by so he can go back home.

"Oh my god, I can't believe that guy is back here again!" Hayato heard a co-worker hiss to another and pointed to a booth in the far corner. Hayato quickly looked over and sure enough, the same guy that chewed him out was back, reading again. Hayato felt his heart jump for joy and before he heard another nasty comment about the mystery guy, he hopped over the counter and rushed over to the guy and sat down across from him. The guy looked up at him surprised for a couple of seconds but than looked back down, "I'm not apologizing."

"I don't need one." Hayato stated with frown and a determine look. The guy glanced back up, "Oh?" Hayato swallowed and continued, "I don't agree with everything you said yesterday but I am interested by it. You're right, I'm always trying to keep up an image and do whatever is possible to keep a peaceful life. I don't think anything is harmful about it but pretending to be something is wrong too. So…am sorry for being so insensitive."

The guy stared at him again and Hayato felt like he was being studied again. Suddenly the guy smirked a little at him, "Can I get an ice coffee and a piece of coffee cake?" he asked. Hayato smiled and stood up to get it but than paused and looked back, "Uh, can you tell me you're name?" he asked sheepishly. The guy looked hesitant at first but than pulled a notepad and pen out of his pocket and wrote on it before handing it to Hayato. Hayato looked at it and read out loud, "Hachiman Hikigaya." He smiled warmly at it and than asked,

"Can I get a phone number too?"

Thanks for the bruised nose

"Hey, Hikky, can you hand back Hayama-kun this book I borrowed from him. I would do it but the teacher wants me to run some errands right now." Yuigahama pleaded in front of Hachiman's desk. Said boy sighed and took the book out of her hands. She gave him a quick smile and zipped back to the front. He looked down at the book he was handed and recognized the title and cover. This was something he had already read a month ago. He looked over at the popular group in the class, Hayato was in the center telling what seemed to be a very interesting story as he kept making wild gestures and everyone laughing or wowing.

Hachiman himself wasn't all that interested in it and thought of just waiting till Hayato was finished. However, the gloomy teen wanted to get back to his own reading and decided to just hand it over, not caring if he was interrupting a really good part in the conversation or not.

He silently strolled over to the group and stood behind the star student. Before he uttered a word, Hayato yanked his arm back violently and hit Hachiman square in the face and flat on his back. Everyone gasped and Hayato zipped around and gasped over what he done, "Oh my god, Hikitani I am so sorry!" he shouted and crouched down where the other teen laid, out cold. Kakeru whistled out loud, "Damn, he is knocked out!"

"Someone should take him to the infirmary!" Yamato piped in. Hayato was already way ahead of the gesture and scooped Hachiman in his arms bride style since he learned it was the most effect way to carry an unconscious person. Hina squealed and took out a camera and started snapping pictures before Yumiko smacked her head with a slipper.

Hayato quickly made his way out of the room; the only people that followed him were Hina and Saika. He ignored all of Hina's suggestions to wake him up with a true love kiss and Saika's offers to help carry Hachiman. When they finally arrived, Hayato felt worn out, not from carrying Hachiman but by the worrywart trap and the yaoi obsessed fangirl.

The nurse instructed him to lay Hachiman across on one of the beds and than was explained on what had happened. She exam Hachiman and declared he'll be fine with just a bruised nose and than gave Hayato a light scowling and lecture on being careful next time. Soon though, Hachiman stirred and let out a groan before opening his eyes. Saika nearly jumped on top of him with joy but restrain himself as Hachiman sat up slowly with a headache.

"What the hell happened?" he moaned and suddenly felt pain shooting in his nose and he quickly held it and groan in agony. Hayato winced and bowed apologetic, "I'm sorry. I accidently hit you in the face and knocked you out!"

Hina jumped in with a devilish grin, "Than he cradled you in his arms bride style and rushed you here while shouting to the world that he will never lay a hand on you ever unless its consent!"

Hachiman looked at him with utter disgust while leaning back. "Of course none of that is true!" Hayato yelled. Saika pouted, "Not the bride style part." He mumbled out loud, clearly jealous over god knows what and Hayato didn't want to know. Hachiman stared at him harder and Hayato blushed a little and turned around with his hands on his hips, "Well coach taught me that was the most efficient way to carry an unconscious person!"

"You're gross," Hachiman hissed and lay back down with his back facing the other. Hayato turned back around looking extremely insulted on being called that by him of all people.

"Now, now, what matters is you helped your friend, young man. Now the three of you can go back to class while I patch your friend up." The nurse said and gestured for Hachiman to sit back up.

"He's not my friend." The two boys said in union. Hina giggled and piped in, "No but lov—" Hayato covered her mouth with his hand and pushed her out the infirmary with Saika waving Hachiman a quick good bye and following after them.

A little later, Hachiman came back to the classroom with a patch covering his entire nose and looking more miserable than he usually did. Kakeru leaned back on his seat and whispered to Hayato, "He looks so pissed." Hayato smiled a little, "He always do." He joked.

When the last class finished Hina tapped on Hayato's shoulders and whispered, "Kiss and make up." with a serious look. Hayato shot her a cold stare before Ooka piped in and translated, "I think she means you should apologize."

Yumiko scowled, "He already did, didn't he? Besides, that weirdo had it coming anyways. His always glaring at us and pulling despicable stunts and claiming they're, like, for the greater good." Kakeru folded his arms; "I hate to agree but maybe its just karma using Hayato's as payback for all of us."

Yuigahama shifted uneasy, "This all wouldn't happen if I just returned your book to you myself." She said sounding very guilty. "But than you'd be the one that got hit and that would be worst!" Kakeru exclaimed and than got punched in the gut by Yumiko.

During the groups little squabble, Hachiman finished packing up and headed straight to the door. Without skipping a beat, Hayato trailed after him, ignoring his friends calling his name or any other student trying to get his attention. He picked up his pace and grabbed Hachiman by the shoulder to slow him down. The gloomy teen glanced at him before Hayato said anything, "Uh, are you going to the service club?" he asked. Hachiman pushed his hand off his shoulder and continued his stroll, "No, sensei said I can skip today because of what happened. I guess I should thank you." His tone was uncaring as always. Hayato sighed and rubbed the back of his neck but kept following him all the way out the school.

"Are you sure you're fine. You're not woozy or pushing yourself too hard?" Hayato said out of concern. Hachiman assured him he was fine but Hayato still followed just to make sure. They arrived at the bike rakes and Hachiman turned to him, "Well, you stalked me all the way out here. What else ya want?" Hayato chuckled a little and shrugged, "It really was an accident." He said and the other nodded, "I know. Can't say I didn't see it coming sooner or later. Considering all the shit I talk towards you and everyone."

Hayato winced at that, "It doesn't mean you deserved it." Hachiman hummed to himself, "No, I did. To tell the truth, I rather it been from you than anyone else." As he unlocked his bike Hayato made a proposal, "I still want to make it up to you. How about coming to karaoke with the gang and me? I'll show you a really good time!" It was Hachiman's turn to winced, "Eww, I'm glad Ebina isn't here to hear that little slip up." It took another second for Hayato to realize how that sounded and blushed,

"Y-yeah, oh god I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that." He sounded a bit nervous now.

Hachiman studied him for a moment before mounting on his bike, "I'll think about it." Hayato perked back up, "About karaoke?" Hachiman smirked, "No. About what you didn't mean." He bumped against his shoulder as he rode past him.

Hayato stood there staring after him while trying to figure out what he meant by that. When he did, his entire face turned red.

Yaoi God

Hina Ebina had a good feeling about today. This morning she woke up feeling refresh and cheerful, she made her favorite breakfast, and made her way to meet up with her best friend Yumiko, Kakeru, and Hayato. Today they were on their way to a Con she been dying to go to and managed to convinced some people to come along. While she instructed everyone on how these things work, at the corner of her eye she spotted another familiar group.

"Ah, isn't that the service club?" she asked and everyone looked where she was pointing and sure enough, Yukino and her crew were there dressed up like characters from a fantasy quest genre. Yumiko grimaced, "What the hell are they up to this time? And what are they wearing?" Ebina straighten up her glasses to get a better look, "Looks like they're heading to same destination." Yumiko looked horrified at that statement, "You don't mean-oh god can I get one day with out that Yukino bitch!" Hayato patted her shoulder to calm her down. Before she was stopped, Ebina waved and called out to all of them. Yui and Saika were the only ones that waved back while everyone walked up to them.

"Are you guys going to this Con thing too?" Kakeru was the first to ask. Yoshiteru smirked and shook his head, "How foolish to think me and my comrades are just "going" to the realm of fantasy and magic like an norm looking for a joyance ride. No, commoner, we shall conquer with my strategic leadership and write our names into the history books!" the large teen bellowed causing the entire station to stare at him.

Yukino stepped in and translated, "We're simply going there to fill out a request made by Zaimokuza-kun. He has written a novel he thinks will sale at this convention. We are merely helping him reach his sales goal as well as help attract potential customers." She explained it ever so coolly and professional-like. Yui smiled sheepishly, "Yeah, now you know why I couldn't come with you guys in particular. Didn't think we bump into each other this early on since I heard this is a huge event."

Ebina nodded and grinned, "Yeah, it hold ranks as third for best Cons in the area! All the high raking doujinshi artist and writers come there and I been saving almost an entire year to grab copies from my favorites!" she giggled hysterically. Hachiman smirked looked up at Yoshiteru, "Wow, and all the best will be there you say? You think you even have a chance of people even looking at you're table?" he poked him on the side with the fake sword he built. Yoshiteru started sweating bullets but tried to keep up his confident front, "M-minor threats will not damper my shogun spirit. Do not be frighten by rumors of the greats but look ahead and dive into your fate and-"

"We're all gonna leave you here if you don't hurry on this damn train." Hachiman called behind him as everyone had already gathered in the co-train while Yoshiteru was rambling.

The co-train was packed but that was to be expected since many events were going on this weekend. The service club had a bit more room since everyone else seemed to want to stand or sit as far away from the oddly dressed teenagers. Yui and Saika seemed the most embarrassed and Yumiko was embarrassed for them. Everyone else in the group was relaxed and off in their own little worlds.

Suddenly the co-train shook a little, causing everyone to stumble a little and look around bewildered. A voice over the inner come came out, "We apologize to all our passengers and to expect a few more tiny shakes due to strong wind resistance."

Everyone seemed to calm down a little and went back to what they were doing. Another shake came and Hachiman nearly stumbled over on the floor but he caught himself in time. He was relieved for a moment until another shake came and he fell over and landed on someone's lap. He looked up and discovered it was Hayato's lap and Ebina had a recorded camera out. Quickly he tried to get up but something on his costume was snagged on Hayato's person and the two couldn't separate.

It was awkward to say the least.

No, matter how much they struggled it looked like Hachiman was grinding himself on top of Hayato's lap who was pushing forward. Everyone in the cart looked mortified, mothers covering their children's eyes, elders shaking their heads in disgust, and to top it all off their friends weren't making it seem like a misunderstanding!

Yumiko was screaming for Hachiman to get off of Hayato while hitting him with her purse. Yui was frozen with shock and Saika was pulling on Hayato's arm while looking on the verge of tears. Ebina was having a ball recording; Kakeru and Yoshiteru were shouting nonsense; and poor Yukino just covered her forehead feeling a headache coming along.

By the time they arrived to their destination, the workers kicked out all the teenagers. Hayato and Hachiman finally managed to separate but the emotional trauma was already done. Both boys looked red in the face and mortified by the entire incident. Yumiko clung to Hayato's arm, trying to comfort him while Kakeru kept laughing until his sides hurt.

Yui tried to hold Hachiman's arm too but the other teen was already walking back to the train stop announcing very loudly he didn't feel like doing this (or ever) anymore. Yoshiteru ran behind him and stopped him, "Wait my most loyal comrade! Do not let accidental penetration to the anal discourage your fate-"

WHAM

The sound of Hachiman hitting Yoshiteru across the head with his hard cardboard sword can be heard echoing through the station.

"I'm leaving!" he said once again but before he could turn around Yukino tapped his shoulders and held out Ebina's record camera she had skillfully swiped and pressed play. It replayed the entire incident and Hachiman's entire face turned pale. He tried to snatch the camera but Yukino was too quick and he missed every time. Finally he grimaced, feeling tired and defeated he hung his head in shame, "Fine." Triumphed Yukino walked back to the group with Hachiman dragging himself behind her.

Ebina was handed back her record camera and watched all her friends walk out of the station either dejected or excited. She especially watched Hayato and Hachiman stealing glances at each other before blushing and looking away.

Ebina thanked the Yaoi God for another blessing from heaven.

Sticky note flirting

Hachiman has a stalker. As crazy and utterly impossible as it may seem he couldn't prove it for anything else. The stalker was clever and knew he would ignore any average love letter in his locker, dismissing them as pranks or mistaken locker identity. No, the stalker had come up with a unique way of letting Hachiman know of their utter sick affections for him: sticky notes.

It started at the library when Hachiman was studying peacefully. He had got up to look for another reference book and when he came back he noticed a small yellow sticky note placed on the middle of his notebook paper, something he hadn't put on himself. He peeled it off and read it thinking it was a forgotten reminder.

You look cute today.

Dead fish eyes widen and he looked around for the idiot trying to prank him. No one was around, it was just him in this part of the school library, and he also didn't recall seeing anyone on his way to the shelves or back. Hachiman was utterly confused and crumbled up the note and tossing it before gathering up his things and left.

It was the first of many that kept popping up on everything he owned. All of them had flirty compliments written on them, saying how cute he looked, his hair looked nice, he had an adorable sleeping face, and so fourth.

It's been made very clear that he had himself a stalker.

The utter thought of constantly being watched made the boy break out in a cold sweat. Having a stalker never turned out good and more than less ends with being raped and killed. He first turned to a responsible adult about his suspicions, Ms. Hiratsuka. She was the first of three other teachers that laughed hysterically.

Ok, on to plan B, get the police. Once again he was let down by adults as an officer explained to him that receiving random sticky notes with nice compliments written on them wasn't enough proof that he was being stalk. The middle age officer even made a foolish suggestion that Hachiman had a secret admirer.

Yeah right. The day Hachiman Hikigaya had a secret admirer was the day hell gets frozen over.

Hachiman chastised himself for seeking help in the first place. He should have already learned to never rely on others. He chalked this up on letting the stalker frighten him this badly. It was settled that Hachiman had to catch this sicko himself, so the next day he acted like he usually did and when free period came around, he got up and walked out of the class room like he always did. However, he was only pretending and was actually peeking outside the door, waiting for anyone to leave a sticky note since the stalker only did it when he was away. Students that walked in and out of the classroom cast him a strange look and just chalked it up to Hachiman being weird again.

Hachiman stayed in his crouching position while peeping into the classroom for about five minutes until he was tapped on his shoulders. He grunted a response but didn't tear his eyes away from his desk. He already knew who was behind him by their usual perfume and shampoo scent.

"Hikky, what in God's name are you doing? You look like a total stalker!" Yui chastised him but was crouching down behind him. He shushed her, "Keep your voice down. I'm trying to catch a real stalker." He whispered. Yui cocked her head to the side and tried to look over his shoulders, "Who's the stalker?" she asked innocently. Hachiman frowned, "If I knew I wouldn't be here trying to find out." He whispered harshly.

"Find out what?" Another person asked and Hachiman, without tearing his eyes away, knew who it was by the small sweet voice and shampoo scent. Yui turned to Saika who was crouching down with them, "Hachiman says there's a stalker in our classroom." She informed. Saika looked shocked, "Oh no that's terrible. Who's being stalked?" he asked innocently.

"Me." Hachiman answered and watched a girl pass by his desk in suspicion. He heard a loud snort followed by muffled laughter and didn't have to look away to know it was Yui about to lose her self.

Hachiman huffed, "I knew no one would believe me so that's why I'm trying to solve this mystery myself."

"I believe you, Hikigaya-kun." Saika piped in and Hachiman felt like crying for joy over the adorable boy's endless support. Yui finally regained herself and wiped her eyes, "I-it's not that I…I don't believe you, Hikky. Heehee, it's just sound so ridiculous."

"So you don't believe me." Hachiman confirmed. Yui shook her head but was still giggling, "Come on, what makes you think you have a stalker?" she asked. Hachiman sighed; seeing that the stalker wouldn't strike now since it had been made obvious three students were watching out for them. Hachiman stood up and walked back into the classroom with the other two following. They stopped in front of his desk and he pulled out a plastic bag full of wrinkled sticky notes. Yui and Saika looked at each other and than at Hachiman was he poured out the sticky notes to be read. Yui and Saika picked them up and read them, one after another.

Hachiman expected that to be enough evidence for Yui to believe him. She looked back at him and instead of looking surprised she looked utterly mad and annoyed. Saika too didn't have the reaction Hachiman was expecting but instead looked dejected and pouting. He looked at both of them confused, "What? You see the evidence in front of you, right? You read all of them! Doesn't that sound like stuff a sick stalker would say?"

"Hikky, you're an idiot!" Yui shouted and stomped back to her desk. Hachiman stared after her and than turned back at Saika, "Forget about her. Totsuka, you said you believe me, right?" he asked in high hopes sweet Saika wouldn't betray him. The smaller boy looked at the pile of sticky notes than back up at Hachiman, "Well, to tell the truth, Hikigaya-kun, theses sticky notes seem like a form of a secret admirer. I thought stalkers sent alarming things like hair or you're cat's paw, like on the news." Hachiman's shoulders slumped and he shook his head, "Totsuka, it would be a cold day in hell if someone genuinely wanted to date me." He chuckled at his own self-loafing as he stuffed the sticky notes back in the plastic bag.

Saika fiddled with his fingers and started to blush a little before mustering up the courage to ask Hachiman, "Hikigaya-kun…is there anyone you would like to date?" he asked shyly.

"Yo—" Hachiman stopped himself before he uttered the word, you, to Saika. 'No, no, no, that was too close. I almost missed stepped into a strange and wonderful new world.' Hachiman thought to himself. Saika cocked his head to the said, "Yo? You mean Yuigahama?" he tried guessing but Hachiman quickly shook his head, "No." he answered. Saika thought again, "Yukinoshita?" he tried guessing again. Hachiman felt a shiver go down his spine that made him grimace and shake his head.

Saika folded his arms, "Well, for now I don't think it's anything that would put your life on the line." He glanced at the bag of sticky notes and smiled, "It's certainly an inspiring way of getting you're attention." He giggled and walked away. Hachiman didn't catch Saika's hidden meaning and went back to conjuring up a new plan on catching his sicko of a stalker.

Another week went by and Hachiman wasn't anywhere closer to finding out who his first stalker is. Yes, first stalker since it seems like Hachiman some how attracted more stalkers that were using the same sticky note tactic. He knew this because he noticed some of the sticky notes had two completely different handwritings on them. This was getting more and more aggravating.

Hachiman started taking his sticky note studies into the clubroom. Yukino didn't say anything against it or was just ignoring it and chalked it up to Hachiman acting gross again. Yui refused to help too but would giggle and blush at Hachiman angry and puzzled expression as he read all the sticky notes he received today.

"What did your admirer say to you today, Hikigaya-kun?" Saika had asked in class the next day. He's been asking that everyday. Hachiman sighed and read over some of the sticky notes on his desk, "'You look super today', 'You are so smart', and 'I want to pet your hair'. Ugh, I can't take all these gushy compliments anymore!" he groan and slumped over his desk not caring he knocked over a few sticky notes on the ground. Saika picked the ones that were dropped and placed them back on his desk while smiling.

"I think they're really sweet." He said and blushed. Hachiman grunted and Saika giggled and patted his head before walking, no, skipping away.

The identity of one of the copycat culprits has been revealed.

Yui came up to him next, "Any leads yet?" she said sounding sarcastic. Hachiman grunted again and she giggled, "These "stalkers" must be very clever. I'd say they're the cleverest "stalkers" in history if they managed to stump you. Especially this one that wrote, 'You always look cool.' I think she's the most genuine."

Hachiman lifted up his head and narrowed his eyes at her, a sticky note was hanging on his forehead, "Did you write that one?" he almost growled. Yui jumped back and blushed madly while denying wildly before running out the classroom almost screaming.

The identity of the second copycat culprits has been revealed.

Hachiman sighed and slumped his head back on is desk. He decided to ignore them since they weren't the one he was trying to capture. The real sticky note stalker was still out there, unknown and free to continue plaguing him with the sticky notes.

"I give up. You win Mr. or Mrs. Stalker. Take me and end it quickly." He said out loud to which everyone ignored.

"Who are you calling a stalker?" Hachiman looked up at the new voice and saw Hayato standing in front of his desk looking at him a bit offended. Hachiman scowled and looked away, "I wasn't talking to you, idiot." He said. Hayato smiled and peeled a sticky note that got stuck on his forehead.

"'Please go out with me.'" He read out loud with an arched eyebrow. "Sounds like someone has a secret admirer." He teased and Hachiman frowned at the wall refusing to look at him. "More like a stalker. The sicko had been torturing me with these annoying sticky notes for almost a month now. I can't even figure out who it is much less know a way on stopping them. They also inspired two more copycats to taunt me. I swear, by this rate all three of them are planning on suffocating me to death with these damn sticky notes!"

Hayato smiled sympathetic as always and patted his shoulder, "Maybe you need to start going out. You sound stressed." Hachiman grunted a response. Hayato clapped his hands together, "How about I treat you to some crepes tomorrow since it's Saturday?" he suggested. The offer of free food made him perked up and side way glance up at the blonde, "Don't you already have plans with you're friends?" he sounded suspicious but Hayato shook his head, "No. Besides, you need this, right? A break?"

Hayato pondered over it for a full minute. He looked away and rested his head on his hand, "Just this once since you said you'll treat me." He grumbled. Hayato grinned ear-to-ear, "Awesome. Hey how about we catch a movie first and than have the crepes?" he cheerfully suggested. Hachiman slammed his hand on his desk and glared at him, "Hey don't get carried away. Don't start acting like we're friends or something." He growled. Hayato pouted and leaned closer, "Aw come on, it's just the movies. One little day socializing won't kill you." He pleaded a bit. Hachiman leaned back feeling his face heat up a little at those blue eyes staring at him like a puppy. He looked away and begrudgingly agreed, "Fine, but you're paying for the movies too. Or any other activities you plan on dragging me to."

Hayato stood back up and nodded while smiling, "Deal. I'll pick you up at your place by 10'." With that he left and Hachiman noticed a little pep to his steps. He was utterly confused on every thing now and wondered when the hell his going to be let off this merry go round of madness.

The sticky note culprit was never caught and was chalked up to one of life's weirdest mysteries in Hachiman's book.

Author's note: Jesus Christ, it's been too long. Anyway here's another terrible dabble shorts of a random pairing I became obsessed with.