Disclaimer: Don't own it.

Author's Note: Yay, another Rod x Nicky ficcy :). Well, I hope you all enjoy.

Nicky was sitting on the couch, heart aching. The television was off. The house was unusually quiet. He ran his hand threw his thick hair, sighing gently. His mind raced with confusion. Lately, all he could think of was his roommate, Rod. Rod, The man who had been his best friend since they met in high school, when they were both stupid little freshmen. The two were almost inseparable; you couldn't say, "Rod," without Nicky attached. That was how they were. Rod and Nicky. Closer than most people could even dream of getting with someone else.

The man stood up and started walking towards the door. Hesitating on the light switch, he swallowed, and then turned the lights off. It was summer, but the skies were gray. Oddly, the past few days, the sky never showed it's blue, welcoming color. No, lately, it had been a dull gray, almost as if the world was depressed. He pulled his hood over his head, and walked slowly to the flower shop down the street.

He remembered, once, Rod said he liked roses. This was, of course, after he had come out of the closet. Nicky always remembered that whenever he saw a rose, whether it was red, blue, or yellow, he always thought of Rod. He sniffled; although the weather was warm, Nicky felt a little sick. His stomach had been hurting, and he had no appetite. When he tried to go to sleep his head was pounding in his ears. The man shivered before entering the brightly colored shop.

Flowers laced the ceiling and the walls, in an artistic way, which formed the illusion of a huge daisy. Nicky went straight to the rose section, and picked out one bright, red rose. It was freshly picked; the thorns were still on it. He went up to the cashier, and placed the flower on the counter.

"You sure you want this one, sir? We have lots of others with the thorns off," she said politely. The girl didn't look older than sixteen, with her long hair she almost looked like a twelve year old.

"No, this one's fine, thank you," Nicky reassured her, "how much will that be?"

"Well, since it's just for once, and it has the thorns still on it, I'll give it to you for three dollars."

"Oh no, you don't have to, really, it's fine." Nicky objected. He'd feel bad if he didn't pay the full price.

"It's no problem at all, sir. Three dollars," she smiled, taking the money he handed her, "please come again!"

"I will." He promised, hearing the little bell as he walked out the door. He held the rose close to his heart, eager to give Rod the present. The two had gotten in an argument a week ago, in fact, a week ago today. Nicky felt terrible and wanted to make it up to him.

It was a stupid argument, Nicky thought, as he walked past his house on Avenue Q, I mean, why didn't I just tell him right then and there the truth? Why didn't I just tell him that I loved him? Why did I have to make such a big fuckin' deal about it?

Rod had come home from work a little off that day. When Nicky had asked him what was wrong, his best friend looked at him, eyes watering, and said he loved him. Before Nicky got a chance to even react, Rod was in tears, begging for forgiveness. Nicky told him to get up, and sounded angrier than he really was; in fact, he wasn't angry at all, but it was to late- Rod got defensive. The republican started yelling at Nicky for being so oblivious, claiming all the signs were there. But Nicky, being himself, got defensive, too. He argued that Rod never let Nicky say anything that he felt, and Rod never let him talk.

The argument had ended with Rod slamming the door to the apartment and walking out. Nicky hadn't talked to him since then. But truthfully, he wanted nothing more than to chase Rod and tell him he loved him, too. But Nicky was stubborn. He wouldn't admit defeat to anyone in the spur of the moment. It just wasn't who he was.

But Nicky regretted it so much. He loved Rod. He wanted him to know it more than anything in the world. Today, he was going to tell Rod the truth. Today, he was going to tell his best friend that he loved him more than life itself.

"Ow, shit." Nicky mumbled, realizing the rose had pricked his finger. Blood started slowly seeping out of his fingertip, and Nicky winced. He pulled his sleeve over his hand and let the blood go onto his hoodie. How could it be, that something so pretty could be so painful?

Nicky finally reached where he wanted to be; where he knew Rod was. He walked down a path and turned onto a grassy patch. He saw Rod in the distance, and felt his heart jump. He started walking towards his best friend, and swallowed.

"Hey, Rod…look, I think you should actually let me talk for once," Nicky pleaded, looking toward the sky. "It'd give me a chance to explain myself."

Silence. Nicky felt as though he could continue. "Listen, buddy, I'm sorry for our argument the other day. I guess I just got scared and anger was the only thing I could think of. I know things must've been rough for you, ya know, since you and Ricky broke up. And then you told me you've always loved me…and I guess that just hit me like a brick wall. When you said all the signs were there, I only realized them just then. It was a funny feeling."

Nicky gulped, looking down at the rose he bought. "I remember, once, you said that roses were your favorite flower in the world. 'Cuz they were so pretty, and symbolized love or something. You were always so deep, Rod…I really admired it.

"But I thought it was funny, when I bought this for you. 'Cuz one of the thorns pricked me…" Nicky looked at his finger, which had stopped bleeding, "and I couldn't help but wonder, how could something so pretty and admirable hurt someone? It's kinda like life, ya know? It can give you something so beautiful, but then hurt you at the same time. Or in the next moment…"

Nicky felt his eyes start to fill with tears. "In the next moment, the beauty in something can disappear. Like, the day you told me you loved me, it seemed like life had taken a turn. I thought I was actually going to be happy. But then we argued. And I had to go and be a dumb ass and let you leave. I'm sorry I didn't come see you sooner, I guess I was still angry or something. You know me." Nicky chuckled, letting a tear roll down his face.

Nicky placed the rose on the ground. Tears rolled down his face and stung like boiling water. "See, Rod, maybe if I wasn't such a fucking stubborn kid, it wouldn't have ended like this. I bet, 'cuz I'm so immature, it's going to be the death of me. God, I fucking hope it is!" Nicky screamed, tears pouring down his face. "Just like it was the death of you…"

………………..

"Rod, just fucking leave! You won't even fuckin' let me talk!" Nicky screamed, the anger growing more inside of him. "You don't know what I was gonna say, and yeah, maybe I am a little unaware of things, but that doesn't mean you should point it out like I'm a dumbass or some shit!"

"Fine, Nicky. I don't want to see you, anyway. To think, that when I actually get the nerve to say I-I love you, you just shoot me down like we never had a friendship at all." Rod was choking with tears when he slammed the door to the apartment.

Twenty minutes later, Nicky finally wondered where he had gone. Getting up, he walked out his door and was greeted by ambulances and fire trucks.

"…Poor guy walked right out in front of the drunk driver….No, both are dead…No, we don't know the pedestrian's name…"

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