Title: As Her Bow Glided over the Strings

Author: Evelien Michaels

Rating: PG

Summary: After working on an especially rough case, Olivia, Elliot and his children are invited to a music festival in the heart of New York City. They watch mesmerized as the young violinist dazzles them. One frightful day two months later makes Olivia reflect on everything that happened. "She never looked more beautiful," she realized, "than the day her bow glided over the strings."

Disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order: SVU or its character, however; Kristin Benson and all of her stories are mine… so you may not take them.

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW! I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER!

AS HER BOW GLIDED OVER THE STRINGS

That day two months ago was one I could never forget. I remember waking up and walking into work with a smile spread wide across my lips. The day before Elliot and I had been in court to give our statements about a case that left thirteen women raped and four dead.

Defense did a great job of bringing my past abuse and my mother's rap into the case, trying to prove my opinion of their client was biased. Jury sentenced him to life in prison; we were happy to get another freak off the streets. The precinct was alive and jubilant after winning yesterday's nail biting case. I remember the look of victory on Cragen's face when he told us we could have the day off (as long as we took paperwork home of course.)

My partner and I spent the day in our joint apartment waiting for the kids to come home. We sat in front of the TV laughing at the reruns of some cop show that made the job look like a soap opera.

Lizzie and Dickie came home around three arguing over something that happened at school. Dickie had been teasing her about some boy she had a crush on, and Lizzie was getting him back with remarks about her beating him in the middle school's annul two and a half mile run around the building.

Ten minutes later, Kathleen and Kristin walked through the door, smiling and rolling their eyes at the twins' argument. I remember how Kathleen groaned when asked about high school and the way Kristin's eyes lit up when she told tales of the students in her calculus and physics classes. I never understood how she could do everything she did without driving herself crazy, but at the same time it never seemed good enough.

I loved the intensity of her bright white smile that day when she told us about the state orchestra concert that night in the middle New York City. Everyday I would ask myself how I ever became so lucky. How did I deserve a daughter like Kristin? What did I do to make Elliot's children treat me like their mother? Why did I get partnered with the most amazing man I have ever met? Nothing made sense to me anymore. Out of the darkness of my troubled childhood, I had managed to tumble into a sea of endless light and happiness. I do not know how it happened, but I wished that illuminating light had not burned out.

We dressed in black and white for the dinner and performance. I remember how the girls winked at each other when Elliot stood gaping at the thin strapped dress I was wearing.

"Like the dress?" I asked him as I shut the front door.

"It's beautiful…" he answered as he opened the car door for me.

I stared into his blue eyes and stood on my tiptoes. "It looks better off…" I whispered seductively into his ear, causing him to blush.

I laughed as he turned the key and started the engine. During the car ride, I started out the window at the brightly colored city lights that I rarely had a chance to see because most of the attractions were way too expensive. In the back seat, I heard Lizzie and Kristin talking about some "hot" movie star, Kathleen telling Maureen directions on her cell phone, and Dickie's loud rap music that could be heard a mile away from his head phones. In the seat next to me, Elliot was humming along to a Christmas carol that was playing even though it was mid November.

There was something about car rides that made us feel like a family, it was the little moments like these that I loved. As we parked the car and took our seats, I almost cried when Elliot's children said "Good Luck sis," before Kristin headed backstage. All my life I had been waiting, hoping, praying for a family or someone who loved me as much as I loved them; all along they were standing right in front of me.

The conductor spoke praises of the orchestra and thanked us for coming to see the students. Then he introduced the concertmistress, "a bright, intelligent young woman whose presence in this orchestra has livened the long seven hour practices and shared many laughs throughout these three long months."

From the left of the stage, she entered on cue, head held high, her violin and bow gripped loosely in her right hand. She stopped in front of her seat and turned to bow at us, a contagious smile spread across her face. Her eyes locked onto mine for a brief moment before she sat.

The conductor then turned to us once again and announced the first piece. "Our first selection is Mozart's Violin Concerto in G Major featuring our violin soloist, Kristin Benson."

I watched as she turned her chair to face the audience, and sat poised in perfect playing position watching the director's white baton out of the corner of her eye. The song began in unison with a powerful G Major chord and took off from there with a fortissimo chase between the upper and lower strings. The music suddenly slowed down and above the rest of the orchestra came the sweet melody of her violin. My eyes immediately focused on the 5'8", fourteen year old girl dressed in a long sleeved black dress. Glancing around the table, I knew everyone was thinking exactly the same thing I was; "How could that much power come from such a weak, frail body?"

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Present Day – January 24, 2005

The door creaked open slowly, waking me from my splendid flashback. IN my seat, I turned to see Elliot's sad blue eyes peering at the two of us from the darkened corner of the room where the bedside light did not reach. His eyes held a look of concern, though his face seemed tense with frustration. My focus turned to the floor so he could not see the silver tears walled up in my eyes.

The door handle turned almost inaudibly, but I knew it had opened.

"Please don't leave…" I pleaded.

The look of frustration immediately left his face; he knew my absence of courage was depleting quickly. I, Olivia Benson, was the tough detective. I never cried in front of anyone, especially Elliot. However, this was my daughter… her life… in the last two months I watched it slip away. I held her close when we found out the tumor was too large to remove, I told her she would pull through when her long hair began to fall out from chemo… she was gone…

"Liv…" he whispered, the comfort his strong hand on my shoulder gave me surprising me.

He kneeled beside me, knowing that I could not keep my tears choked back much longer. It started as a half sob and ended in me burying my head into his chest. He wrapped his arms around my waist as my tears plummeted down unto his shirt, creating a make shift pool in the center.

Eventually, I lost my voice and the only sound was the ticking of the clock over her bed. I felt his own tears falling down unto my auburn hair and for a second I though that this was my fault for inflicting this pain on him… then I remember Kristin was like a daughter to him too.

"Liv…" he whispered again, the sorrow in his voice apparent, "she was… she was holding this when she…"

I lifted my head to see a folded paper lying delicately in her hand. He slipped it from her spider like fingers and handed it to me. The snapshot was from the state orchestra performance. Kristin, Elliot, Maureen, Kathleen, Dickie, Lizzie and I were all smiling at the photographer. The memory made me smile for a moment as I recalled that beautiful night of music.

"Elliot… she never looked as beautiful," I realized, "as the day her bow glided over the strings."

FINISHED

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Evelien