Title: Oy Vey!
Pairings: Kyman (Eric Cartman/ Kyle Broflovski)
Rating: PG-(13?)
Summary: Eric and Kyle spend their first Hanukkah together as a couple. Takes place after the bunny incident.
Disclaimer: In no way do I own South Park, because if I did…well I don't …so no worries!
Author's Note: Warning: This story includes shōnen-ai, of the boy on boy variety. If that's not your cup of tea, press the back button now. By the way, I didn't do anything research on Hanukkah; this is all I know on it.
Anyone that knows Eric Cartman knows that he absolutely hates Jewish people, especially Kyle Broflovski. This seems like a fact for the people of South Park, but it hasn't been for a long time. When the boys were seventeen, Eric realized that he really didn't hate Kyle, but he was in love with him. The next day, as soon as Eric saw Kyle, he asked him out on the spot.
He expected Kyle to scream and run, or to get mad and try to attack him. But, what he didn't expect was for Kyle to attack him in a bone crushing hug and exclaim that he felt the same way. They have been together since May when the incident in the park occurred, and this is how they spent their first Hanukkah together.
"Kahl! We're fixing to light the menorah! Eric shouted from his spot at the table. It was their first Hanukkah together as a couple, and he was excited.
Kyle was upstairs trying to find Eric's present. He finally spotted the somewhat large box on his desk. Grabbing it, he ran down the stairs, but not fast enough to earn a scolding from his mother.
"Eric, how do you like Hanukkah so far?" Sheila asked as she set the matches for the menorah on the table.
"I think it's amazing so far, Mrs. Broflovski. Now then, where did Kyle run off to?"
"He had to run upstairs, I think he had forgotten something." Sheila said as Gerald and Ike sat down at the table.
Kyle then joined them at the table, sitting next to Eric. He had the box under the table next to his feet.
"Please join hands with the people on your left and right." Gerald instructed as everyone at the table joined hands.
Gerald led them in prayer, and then he lit the first candle. It burned with the same brightness that was in Kyle's eyes as he looked at the menorah, then at Eric. Eric was astonished at the sight in front of him.
'I guess this is what being in a family is like.' He thought as he studied the people around him. A single crystalline tear rolled down his cheek.
Kyle looked over at Eric and saw the tear drop silently onto the table with a splash. He loosened his hand from Eric's and wiped the tear off the table, then the remains of it from Eric's face.
They released each other's hands as Gerald stood up. He reached under the table and picked up something. He set four boxes on the table. Kyle looked at his dad with a confused, then knowing expression.
Gerald handed Sheila her present. She smiled up at him and opened it. She looked down at the locket in the box. Leaning over, she kissed Gerald on the cheek.
"Happy Hanukkah Gerald. And here's your present." She said as she reached under the table and handed him a box wrapped in light blue wrapping paper.
He slowly opened the box and held up the homemade yarmulke in his hands. It had a Star of David knitted in the center.
"Happy Hanukkah dear." He said as he kissed Sheila.
"Here you are Kyle." Gerald said as he handed a box to Kyle.
"And don't forget Ike." Shelia said as she handed a box to Ike.
Ike looked at the lone box on the table. It just sat there.
"Mommy, who's that box for?" Ike said as he looked at the others at the table.
"That's for Eric, bubby. Happy Hanukkah Eric. I'm glad that we could share our heritage with you." She said as she handed the box to Eric.
Eric, with his slightly teary eyes, looked at the box in front of him.
"You guys got me a present?" He said as he picked it up. Slowly but surely, he opened the box to find a chain with a pendant on it.
Kyle had opened his present already and was examining its contents. It looked like half of a Star of David. He looked over at the pendant Eric was holding. His parents bought them matching pendants.
"Eric, look at what we're holding."
Eric looked at the matching pendants that they both held.
"Like two halves of a whole." He whispered.
"And birds of a feather too." As he handed Eric the present he got him.
He set the pendant down on the table and opened the present Kyle got him. Lifting the lid open, he saw a photo album. On the cover, there was a picture of him and Kyle together at the park. It had been one of their first dates.
He looked at Kyle and smiled. Then, he stood up from the table.
"I'll be right back. I've seemed to have forgotten Kyle's present in my jacket.
Walking toward the front door, he stopped at the coat rack and looked through his jacket pockets. Finding what he needed, he walked back into the dining room and sat down. Facing Kyle, he placed the small box in his hands.
"Happy Hanukkah Kahl;I hope you like it." He said as Kyle slowly opened the box.
To his surprise, there was a second box, slightly smaller than the first. He opened the second box, and found a ring box inside of it.
He opened the ring box and found a small silver band with an emerald set in it.
"Look on the inside, I had it engraved."
Kyle pulled the ring from its plush confinement and held it up to the light. On the inside of the ring, he saw the words 'My Jew' engraved in French Script.
"Since we're not ready for marriage yet, I wanted to at least get you a promise ring. See, I have a matching one" He said as Kyle examined the silver band on his finger. It was the same as his, but Eric's had a ruby set in it.
"Is yours engraved?"
"Yeah, but mine says 'Your Nazi'."
A few hours later, around midnight…
"So, how did you like Hanukkah so far?"
"I loved it. It's hard to believe that this was only the first night. Now I can't wait for Christmas!"
Eric wrapped his arms around Kyle in a protective hug. Kyle nuzzled his face into Eric's neck as he wondered how Gentiles celebrate Christmas.
"Are you going to show what Christmas is like?"
"Of course I am now my little Jew! You'll love it, I just know it!"
'Who knew opposites really do attract?' Kyle thought to himself as he leaned in to kiss Eric.