If you've been following me for awhile, PLEASE READ!
Author's Note: Hello everyone! I know I haven't been around much lately, but I've been extremely busy with work. We get crazy around the holidays, and I recently started working full time hours, so I've been quite burnt out lately. I know that I have a ton of unfinished stories, and a lot of that is due to just my lack of free time. But I've also been focusing on trying to write a real, non-fanfiction novel. If any of you have been following me for awhile, you might remember the first story I legitimately finished, called Mistake Me. It was a Roxas x Namine pairing, and it seemed to go over fairly well with you guys. Well, I read back through it recently and inspiration struck me! Instead of a typical rewrite, I'm going to be using the same premise with a significantly different story line. If it goes as well as I'm hoping, I will be converting it to a non-fanfiction setting with my own characters, and attempting to publish it. Wish me luck! And please, your reviews are going to be incredibly important in this process, so give me as much feedback as you can!
Keep in mind that this is going to be similar to Mistake Me, but it is not going to be a true rewrite... so don't expect one!
Also, pay attention to the time stamps! Otherwise you'll get confused.
-Simply Rexene
Prologue
The Beginning of the End
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretyme Jun 14
Hi! I just finished reading your new fic, Entangled, and even though I left a review there I just gotta tell you how much I fuckin love your writing! I swear every story just gets better and better! I've been following you ever since you published Malicious Intent and watching you grow as an author over the past couple years has been seriously awesome. Keep it up! I'll leave you alone now, since this might be the creepiest message I've ever sent someone. Just wanted to let you know that you rock.
For all intents and purposes, you can call me Finn. Keep up the great work!
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Well thanks! I'm glad I've been able to keep your interest for such a long time, even though some of my stories are total crap. XD And no worries, I've seen creepier messages. This is the internet after all. :P Anyways, I really appreciate you taking the time to let me know I'm growing as a writer. It's always nice to know my hard work is paying off.
I suppose for all intents and purposes, you can call me Nova. (Though you probably knew that, considering I sign off all my author's notes.) Have a good one!
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re:Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretymeJun 15
Hahaha, yeah I kinda figured your name was Nova. And holy crap! Chapter 2 was intense! You are seriously the fucking goddess of drama! You gotta tell me... Will Link and Zelda make it? Please please pleaseeeeee? ;P
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Ha! You really think I'm gonna cave and ruin the surprise? You'll have to wait like everyone else! But I'll give you a hint...
PSYCH!
I'm publishing Chapter Three tomorrow night. Patience!
FanFictionPrivate Messaging
Subject: re:Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretyme Jun 15
You suck! How do you even have time to write so fast?! Don't you have a job or something?
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Uhhhh hate to break it to you, but I'm only in high school. We're on summer break.
FanFictionPrivate Messaging
Subject: re:Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretyme Jun 15
./. Oh. Sorry... You kinda write like an adult, so I assumed...
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Well, thanks I guess?
FanFictionPrivate Messaging
Subject: re:Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretyme Jun 15
I mean, hey... I'm in high school too, so it's cool. Just usually most of the teen writers on here write like, well... teens. Lol. The finer aspects of story telling kinda get lost beneath the terrible grammar and mind boggling plots.
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Hey, at least they're trying. I used to write like that, you know. I can't even look at my old profile without cringing. XD
FanFictionPrivate Messaging
Subject: re:Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretyme Jun 15
Hahaha I can't even picture it! A bad story from Nova? Impossible!
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Don't believe me? My old user tag is starryn1ghtn0va. Go check it out. Seriously. I started that account back when I was in middle school. XD
FanFictionPrivate Messaging
Subject: re:Huge Fan
From: itsadventuretyme Jun 15
...
Wow...
FanFiction Private Messaging
Subject: re: Huge Fan
From: seeyourstarexplode Jun 15
Told ya so. And hey, why don't you add me on WhatsApp? I wanna crawl into bed soon, plus having a convo on here is seriously the worst. Same user tag as on here.
June 15, 10:13pm
Friend Request from itsadv3nturetyme
Request Accepted
Finn: Nova?
Nova: Yepp! Found me pretty fast!
Finn: Haha yea, I use this to chat with my internet friends
Nova: Oh, got a lot of those?
Finn: Mostly just guys I game against, but yeah
Nova: Oooh, am I your first girly friend on here?
Finn: Nah lol got one that consistently kicks my ass on COD
Nova: Ha!
Nova: Hope you didn't mind moving over here
Nova: It's just easier
Finn: Oh I don't care
Finn: I'm mostly amazed ur even talking to me
Nova: Eh, I like making new friends
Nova: Why not?
Finn: Well gee, make me feel special y don't ya?
Finn: XD
Finn: Kidding
Finn: Didn't anyone ever tell u not to talk to strangers?
Nova: Well that's why I don't give out personal info on the internets
Nova: For all I know, you couldn't be a total creeper
Finn: So could u!
Finn: Some 40 yr old man jacking off
Finn: Cuz u know I'm just that sexy
Finn: *eyebrow waggle*
Nova: ...
Nova: Ew.
Nova: Well I'm not
Nova: Though you'll just have to take my word for it
Nova: Lol
Finn: Hahaha I guess u'll just have to take mine too
Finn: Sooooooooo
Finn: What year are u?
Finn: In school, I mean
Nova: Gonna be a senior
Nova: You?
Finn: Same!
Finn: Oooohhh, I wonder if you go to my school
Nova: Lol you know those chances are slim to none, right?
Finn: Well yeah
Finn: But a guy can dream, right?
Finn: I mean, ur prolly some gorgeous girl
Finn: U know, just judging by the way u write
Nova: What on Earth does my writing have to do with my appearance?
Finn: Shut up! I'm trying to be suave here
Nova: Save the Suave for your shower, weirdo. :P
Finn: Right, the shampoo brand XD
Finn: Damn, u got wit
Finn: Fine, but u can't say I didn't try
Nova: I suppose I can't
Nova: But hey, I'm fading fast
Nova: I'll message you tomorrow maybe?
Finn: I look forward to it
Finn: But post chapter 3 first!
Nova: Hahaha
Nova: Will do
Nova: Night!
Finn: night
POV: Axel DiRosa
And that was how it all began; my entire online friendship with the guy I only knew as "Finn." I was fully aware that it wasn't his real name, and he had probably guessed that "Nova" wasn't mine either. But I had a bigger secret, one that I couldn't bear to break to him.
I'd always thought it would be harmless to lie about my gender on the internet. After all, the only reason I did it was because I didn't want people to know I was a man publishing romance stories. Looking back on it, it was a pretty fickle thing to be worried about. After all, would my fans really care if I was a man or a woman? All they seemed to care about was when the next update was coming. But when I first started writing back in middle school it seemed much more important, and by the time I realized that nobody gave a shit it was too late to go back and change it. I'd become well known as Nova, and if I suddenly changed all of my tags, it would just end up confusing people. So I didn't bother. What could possibly go wrong? Even if I ever published a book, people use fake names all the time to hide their identities.
When Finn first messaged me, it hadn't occurred to me to tell him that I was actually a guy. He was just a fan, someone to chat idly with. So I kept up my alter ego and just let him think I was a girl. And hey, it worked.
That is, until he fell for me.
And, you know... I fell for him.
June 24, 4:31pm
Finn: Nov, u around?
Nova: What's up?
Finn: Nuffin, just missed ya
Finn: It's been awhile
Finn: We used to talk every day
Nova: Yeah...
Nova: I've been in the hospital for the past couple days
Finn: What?!
Finn: R u ok?!
Nova: I'm fine...
Nova: It's my brother...
Finn: What happened?
Nova: He was in a car accident
Nova: His girlfriend was driving
Nova: She pulled out in front of a semi
Finn: Holy fuck
Finn: Nova, I'm sorry...
Finn: Is he ok?
Nova: He had surgery
Nova: But he won't wake up
Nova: I... I need to go.
Finn: Ok... but I'll be here for u if u need me
POV: Axel DiRosa
To be honest, I couldn't even think about Finn with how upset I was. All I could think about was my brother, Lea. We were twins, and we'd been inseparable since birth. Did we fight? Yeah, like dogs. Did I occasionally wish he'd fuck off? Of course. But I loved my brother more than I could ever express, and watching him die in this hospital bed was in turn killing me.
"Axel, why don't you go home and get some sleep? We'll stay with him tonight."
My mother's touch at my shoulder caused my body to tense and my jaw to tighten. "No. I'm staying here. I won't leave him."
"Honey, you haven't slept in nearly three days..."
"I'm not leaving him!" I barked, raking a hand through my messy red hair to push it out of my eyes.
I could hear her sigh as she turned to my dad. "I tried?"
"It's fine, Lucy. Just let him stay. We should all stick together as a family. For Lea..."
My grip tightened on Lea's hand and I let out a low growl. "Wake up, damn it... Just wake up."
June 25, 6:09pm
Finn: Nova? How's ur brother?
Finn: ...Nov?
Finn: I hope he's ok...
June 30, 3:54pm
Finn: It's been awhile
Finn: I really hope he's ok..
Finn: Can u let me know?
Finn: I'm worried...
July 2, 10:06am
Finn: Nov?
Finn: I guess if u don't answer soon I'll take the hint
Finn: I miss u, Nova...
July 6, 4:40pm
Finn: I'll leave u alone I guess
Finn: I really hope ur brother is ok
Finn: We all miss ur updates, btw
Finn: Everyone on FF is wondering where u r
Finn: Bye, Nova...
July 7, 12:29pm
Nova: Finn, you around?
Finn: Wow, didn't think I'd hear from u again
Nova: I'm sorry..
Nova: My brother...
Nova: He's gone
Finn: Oh fuck, Nova... I'm so sorry...
Finn: Don't apologize
Finn: I get it
Finn: Are u okay?
Nova: I ...don't know
Nova: He was my twin
Nova: I feel like I'm missing half my soul
Finn: Fuck...
Finn: Anything I can do?
Nova: Unless you can turn back time, not really
Nova: I'm just glad I have someone to talk to
Finn: Well yeah, I'll always be here for u
Finn: I know I'm just some stranger on the internet
Finn: But I care about u, Nov
Nova: Yeah... I care about you too, Finn
POV: Axel DiRosa
It was around that time that I really started to fall for Finn. I never meant to, of course. But I was hurting so badly from the loss of my brother, and it seemed like he was the only one I could talk to about it. All of my friends from school were too scared to talk to me. I think they were worried it would be awkward and depressing to have me around. Truthfully, it probably would have been. I guess I can't blame them too much for not wanting to ruin their summer vacation with my drama. Yeah, they were terrible friends, but they were only human.
I spent a lot of time confiding in Finn, and never once did he complain about my ...well, complaining. Most of the time, he didn't even have to say anything. Just having him there was the most comforting thing that I'd had since Lea passed away.
Of course, there was something else that I was struggling with as my feelings developed for Finn. I wasn't gay. At least, I'd never thought I was. Not that I was a lady killer at school or anything, but I'd gone out with a couple girls since I got into high school. I definitely found women attractive, that was for sure. But the more I thought about Finn, the more my mind began to wander into the possibility that maybe men were attractive too. I was starting to look at men differently than I had before, but it was only confusing me further.
The huge problem was, I was pretty damned sure that Finn was 100% straight. So even if I did ever meet him, all I'd be doing would be breaking his heart.
July 20, 5:52pm
Nova: So I have a question
Finn: Yeah?
Nova: Do you, like... date a lot?
Finn: Uhhh
Finn: I wouldn't say a lot
Finn: I mean, I've gone out with a girl from school before
Finn: Didn't last long, tho
Finn: Y?
Nova: I was just curious
Nova: You are quite "suave" after all
Nova: :P
Finn: Ha!
Finn: Tell her that
Finn: She dumped me at the junior prom last year
Finn: Women can be bitches
Nova: Hahahaha
Nova: Hey, there's always dudes ;P
Finn: HA!
Finn: Nooooooo thank you
Finn: I respect gay guys and everything but
Finn: Yeahhhhh
Finn: NOPE
Nova: Hahaha
Nova: Well good
Nova: Homophobes are literally the worst people ever
Finn: Right?
Finn: Why do they think other people's business has anything to do with them?
Finn: Do whoever the fuck u want
Nova: Lol
Nova: Brb
Nova: Mom made dinner
Nova: She wants us to all eat together
Nova: First time since my brother died...
Finn: Enjoy ur dinner, Nov
Finn: ttyl
POV: Axel DiRosa
So, I guess I had my answer. Finn, or whoever he really was, was completely straight. There was no way I'd ever be able to come clean to him, and I seriously needed to figure out how to shut my feelings for him down.
I lifted myself out of bed and headed downstairs, pocketing my cellphone. I had no idea why Mom wanted to eat dinner as a family, but I was a bit suspicious about it.
"There you are! I've been calling you for like ten minutes."
"Sorry, Mom. I was working on a story."
She snorted; the closest thing I've heard to a laugh from her in weeks. "Of course you were. Are you ever doing anything else?"
"Not generally, no."
Dad rounded the corner into the kitchen and gave me his typical look of disappointment. He had always wished that I could be more like Lea. He was the athletic one. Practically played every sport the school offered. I was the quiet nerdy one who spent every second of my free time writing romance novels.
"Love you too, Dad..." I grumbled under my breath, rolling my eyes as I sank into my seat at the table. It was then that a heavenly scent hit my nose. "Wait. Is this... did you make vegan mac and cheese?" It was my absolute favorite meal ever.
"Yeah, she made your gerbil food. Who needs real, delicious cheese when you can be eating a plant-based cheeze substitute?" Dad quipped sarcastically, rolling his eyes so hard I could feel the headache it would give him.
Mom shot him a glare, sitting down at the table. "Hush, Jack. I think what Axel is doing is respectable."
"Veganism is complete bullshit and you know it, Luce. Animals were put on this planet to feed us."
I just swallowed down every argument that was attempting to spring from my mouth. I wasn't about to have this fight with him again.
"Jack, leave it alone. I made you your own pan of mac and cheese like I always do. Eat it and shut up."
Lea never understood why I went vegan, but he never once mocked me about it. He just lived his own life and supported mine. Fuck, did I miss him...
"Hey Mom? Why did you make my favorite dish? We've been living on takeout since we got home."
"Well... truth be told, Axel, we have something to talk to you about."
Shocker there. "So?"
She put her fork down and dabbed at her mouth with a napkin, clearly dragging out the silence as long as she could. "Axel... we're going to be moving."
It took a second for it to really sink in. "Moving? Moving where? When?"
"Well, do you remember where your Uncle Teddy lives?"
I had to think for a moment, but then it hit me. "Twilight Town?! We're moving to Twilight Town?! That's like halfway across the country!"
"Axel, don't yell at your mother. She and I both think that we could all use a change of scenery."
"What, so Lea dies and we all have to completely uproot our lives? We have memories in this house! We grew up here!"
Mom reached over and grabbed my arm, trying to calm me down. "Axel, please... We know that this is going to be difficult, believe me. But the memories are part of the reason why we need to get out of this house. Everywhere I look, I see Lea. My heart hurts all the time..."
"So we just move on and forget about him? That's what you're suggesting?"
"Lea will always be in our hearts, Axel. You know that."
Dad was done arguing. "We've already discussed it, and it's happening."
I poked at my mac and cheeze with my fork, giving a quite heavy sigh. "All right, well... when? Next year?"
"Well, no. Sweetie, we don't want to disrupt your school year, so Teddy is going to let us stay with him until we can find a place. We're going to be leaving in two weeks."
Her voice resonated in my mind. Two weeks... In two weeks, I was going to have to leave my entire life behind. Including my brother.