Author's note: Thanks to some wonderful followers of my stories who helped me to make the decision to write this diary from Sherlock's perspective. I began writing this in mid March of last year, following some positive feedback from people who said they would be interested in reading the diary, so it has been a long time coming. I have made several revisions along the way obviously, as I have worked on improving my writing technique, but I feel this is a truly unique way of progressing the storyline, because the reader will get to see backstory for Molly that dates from before she meets Sherlock, as well as watch Sherlock and Molly's continuing relationship beyond the honeymoon. I hope you will enjoy it and support me with your feedback as you read the chapters. I'd love to know what you think of my interpretation of Molly as a character as her diary progresses, and whether you enjoy seeing the glimpses of the continuing "real" relationship. This is the story from which all of my Realizations of Love Dreams stories and Victorian AU's stem. As a result, publication of this particular one will not be as regular. When I reach a dream, I will give the readers some time to read the dream story first if it has already been published. If it is a dream that has not yet been published, I will publish that dream before I continue the diary. So bear with me, as this diary will take several months to reach its completion. In fact, I am still some way from completing it because of all the side stories I have been working on at the same time. I apologize for the long author's note, but I wanted to explain how this diary story is going to play out.

In conjunction with this story, I will be publishing another one (hopefully twice a week), a dream which takes place a few weeks after the birth of Sherlock and Molly's first child, which begins and ends in the "real" world, like my Victorian AU's do. I began writing that one last April and it has been sitting on my iPad for so long, I just wanted to get it published as it is complete, save for revisions. The AU dream chronicles a secret relationship between Sherlock and Molly that follows the canon of the series, but begins with them meeting at university. I hope you will follow that one as well.

You will see dates on this story. I have a specific timeline that ties into my other "real" stories that fall within the timeline, as well as the dream stories. So when a chapter segues into one of these other stories, it will be noted.

1/28/19 Special thanks to reader Elizabeth Robello for providing a a cover image for me of Sherlock reading the diary. A great birthday gift for me!

Diary of an Incurably Romantic Pathologist

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Sherlock picked up the diary and fingered it lovingly. The title, hand-written on the front said, "Diary of an Incurably Romantic Pathologist." It was so fitting. His wife, Molly, was a romantic through and through. She had to be, to have waited for him for so long.

This was his wedding present from Molly, and he planned to enjoy it, reading a little at a time. Molly had told him she had started the diary shortly before they met, pouring her thoughts and emotions into it. The bulk of the volume was her thoughts about her feelings for him over the years. She had warned him there was also stuff in there about Tom. After all, Tom had been her fiancé when Sherlock had been gone, but even then, Molly said she had written more about him, Sherlock, than about her former fiancé.

Sherlock was intrigued. To get a glimpse into Molly's heart this way - it was so intimate, yet so much the type of thing she would do. Molly was always so open and loving with him. She never kept secrets the way he had done, except perhaps the extent of her love for him that he had only realised after they had become engaged.

Molly was his anchor in the world, his soulmate. She had been the one to draw him to faith as well. He knew God's hand had been upon him for years, in the many things he had survived, and the many other things that had been revealed to him after he became a Christian.

Molly walked into the sitting room. She had been in the kitchen, preparing their dinner. They had only been back from their honeymoon for two days, so she was not yet back at work.

Noting the slim volume in his hands, she remarked, "So, you are going to start reading it, then?"

"Of course. I wanted to wait until we were back from our honeymoon. I didn't want any other distractions when we were getting to know each other properly," Sherlock said with a smirk. He reached over and placed the diary on the desk beside him, the extended his arms to her, inviting her to come to him.

Molly obligingly sat on his lap and put her arms about his waist, even as he enfolded her into his embrace. "This gift means a lot to me, my darling. The fact that you are so willing to share your innermost thoughts with me this way, it makes me love you even more."

She smiled at him. "I've always been open with you, Sherlock. Well, except about how much I loved you, and that was because I didn't want to frighten you away. I knew in my heart that if we were ever to be together, it would have to be you making that decision." Then her lips quirked, "Okay, save for the fact I asked you to tell me you loved me first. But that was only in reaction to you telling me to say it."

His arms tightened about her waist. "It was obviously God's timing, It was the right time for me to acknowledge it. That emotional breakthrough is what changed my life - our lives." He moved a hand up to stroke her cheek, then kissed her tenderly. "I love you, my beautiful wife."

"And I love you, my wonderful husband," she answered, reluctantly releasing her hold on him. "Well, you had best get to it then, while I keep working on dinner."

"Do you mind if I make a couple comments of my own in reaction to what you say?" Sherlock asked, removing his own arms from her, just as reluctantly.

"Sure," she responded with a nod. "I always used a new page for a new entry and there's usually plenty of room to write underneath. I'm assuming you want me to read your comments too, right?"

"Of course," he replied, patting his wife's knee. "If you are opening your innermost thoughts to me, the least I can do is reciprocate."

"I'll look forward to reading your comments then," she responded and got off Sherlock's lap to continue making their dinner as he turned to the first page in the diary.

Sherlock squinted at the words, then huffed a little. He needed to wear his reading glasses, and he had to get a pencil as well. He rose from his chair and went into the kitchen to retrieve a mechanical pencil from the miscellaneous drawer, using the opportunity to steal a quick kiss from his wife who was next to the sink, chopping up vegetables, and then he hunted for the spectacles, finding them on the corner of his desk. He returned to settle himself comfortably in his chair, perched the glasses on his nose and then proceeded to read from the beginning.

.../.../.../.../.../.../.../.../.../

July

Dear Diary,

I don't really know why I am doing this. Well, actually I do. I had lunch with Meena today and she told me there's a job opening at St. Bart's, so I'm going to apply for it. I only graduated about a month ago. Yay, I'm officially a Doctor of Pathology. Meet the new Doctor Molly Hooper. *takes a bow* Dad would have been so proud of me. I suppose Mum would have been as well, if we hadn't lost touch, thanks to her alcohol problems. It's a little lonely when you don't have any family to celebrate with.

Anyway, Meena asked what I've been up to lately, and I said I was looking for a job, and that's how she told me about the opening at St. Bart's. She also asked me if I had a boyfriend. When I said no, I've been too busy studying to think about men in general, she rolled her eyes at me and told me I had no life. She said I should buy a diary and write in it, so that she could prove her point that I had no life. So I did, and here we are.

Meena also told me there is this guy who comes into the hospital at times to look at corpses from murders. She had mentioned him to me a long time ago as this guy who was finishing up his post-graduate degree when she did her first year. She warned me about him, says he is a complete arse and considers himself better than anyone else. She told me he turned her down for a date at uni too, so personally, I think it's a bit of sour grapes on her part. I'll reserve judgement on him until such time as I meet him. She did say he's really hot though, with this awesome curly black hair, so I am intrigued.

Apparently he calls himself a "consulting detective." If I meet him, I will have to ask what that means. Oh, and according to Meena, this job opening is as a result of the last head pathologist quitting, thanks to this guy. What's his name again? It's a funny name, one I have never heard before, something like Shirley, but not a girl's name. Oh, that's it - Sherlock - Sherlock Holmes.

Isn't that a weird first name? Maybe he is an arse because he was teased at school for his funny name and used that as a defence mechanism. But what do I know? I'm not a psychologist. Sheesh, I haven't even met the guy yet, so it's silly to be talking about him.

Anyway, that's all for now, I think. I guess I'll write more once I get the job, if I get it. Obviously I am not going to write all the boring details of my everyday existence or Meena will definitely think I have no life.

You are definitely right my love, you had no life - just kidding. But it was a half a life, until we met, at least on my end, because you are the other half of me, my darling.

My heart aches that you had nobody to celebrate with once you received your doctorate. I am so glad that things have been resolved with your mother and that you can share together once again.

I had no idea your friend had such a negative opinion of me, but I can understand why. I was cold and emotionless. But I still stand by what I felt about the previous pathologists. They were complete imbeciles. You were the first person I worked with who actually knew her way around a corpse properly.

You thought my name was funny? And Shirley - really? Now that is embarrassing. And yes, I did get teased at school at times, until I started fighting back with deductions about my classmates' activities when they thought nobody was looking, That stopped the teasing, but they hated me for it. XOX

July

Yay! I got the job! And with only one interview too. My boss, well, supervisor, Mike Stamford, who interviewed me, told me I have a stellar record and thinks I will be perfect for the job! I start tomorrow. I'm definitely thanking God for this opportunity, to find such a wonderful job immediately after graduation is certainly a God thing. Mike told me he wants me to work as the pathologist who deals with Sherlock Holmes. Apparently, my temperament might suit the guy (Okay, I'm sure that means I am the kind of person who likes to please everyone, but that isn't a fault, is it?) I hope he appreciates my work ethic. I do pride myself on being thorough. Guess I'll be doing post-mortems on a regular basis.

I need to practice some corpse jokes - maybe he will like that. Here's one:

Q: How do you know a corpse is sick?

A: It just lays around a coffin.

Okay that is pretty bad. I'll have to think of some better ones.

Yes that was a very bad joke. I seem to recall you telling me that, and I was just as unimpressed then. Mike made a wonderful choice in hiring you - remind me to thank him for that sometime. And wanting to please others is a wonderful quality, my darling. XOX

July

Well, I got to meet him today, Sherlock, that is. Mike introduced us. He was a bit stand-offish. He was kind of like, "Let me do my work and don't get in my way and we will work well together."

So I guess I will just do that, and offer my advice if he asks for it.

Okay, so now I've talked about meeting him, I just have to say OMG OMG. Sherlock Holmes looks like he could have stepped straight out of one of my Barbara Cartland romance novels. He is the total package at least on the handsome scale and looks like a romantic hero any girl would dream of (well, one I would dream of anyway). I have to describe him to you, diary.

The man is drop-dead gorgeous, and I am definitely in love - I mean infatuated with him. He might be the arrogant type, but even my romantic heroes start out that way a lot of the time. Maybe I will be the one to change his mind. As if, I know I'm nothing special.

So now, the details. He's a lot taller than I am. I'm 5'3" and he has to be around 6' so he is kind of intimidating with his superior height. Ha, superior height, superior brain, superior manner - maybe there's a connection? The thing I absolutely adore is his black (ebony? raven?) hair. It is curly and falls adorably over his forehead. I can't tell you how much I want to run my fingers through that hair. I am sure it would be silky to feel. His cheekbones are really defined, as they talk about in my novels - very aristocratic. His lips are full and, may I say it, sensual. I'd like to trace my finger over them. Oh, okay, I admit it. I'd totally like to feel those lips on mine. I haven't been kissed in years. My lips are almost as virginal as I am.

Anyway, I'm getting distracted. What else can I say? Oh, Sherlock - I've decided I like the name, it sounds regal like him - he has this amazing, velvety rich baritone voice. Super sexy. And then there are his eyes. They are blue? green? I can't tell, maybe both. They are very intense. I could get lost in those eyes. Oh dear, my heart is thumping just thinking about him.

Diary, I can tell you these things, but I dare not tell Meena. She would just warn me about him and say I'm an idiot for even entertaining these thoughts about him, especially when she knows what he is like and that he is not into girls (or apparently guys either, for that matter).

Well, I've only met him once, so these are just my first impressions. Perhaps I will change my mind about him later. I can definitely say though, if love at first sight was a real thing, this would be it for me. It will be interesting to see how we work together.

I'm going to go to sleep now. Maybe I'll be lucky enough to dream about him.

I don't understand why you thought of yourself as nothing special. You are beautiful, intelligent and have thee kindest heart of anyone I've ever known, my love.

So, you thought I looked like one of your novel heroes right from the beginning? I'm flattered, sweetheart. It is interesting reading about myself through your eyes. I've never thought about myself as being particularly attractive, but the way you write about me, makes me feel handsome. I'm glad you liked my looks, even if my personality left a lot to be desired at that point.

Your lips are very kissable. I think I am going to kiss them when I put this diary down. Perhaps I'll ask you to run your fingers through my curls as apparently you were longing to do even way back then.

Your line about "my lips are almost as virginal as I am" was quite funny, you are amusing when you don't intend to be.

So you decided you thought my name was regal? I quite like that.

And your comment about me not liking girls or guys - never guys. I'm a one woman man. Oh, you are calling me for dinner. I'll have to continue this another time. Looking forward to it. XOX

.../.../.../.../.../…/…/

Sherlock set down the glasses, diary, and pencil and walked into the kitchen and took the plates from Molly's hands.

"One kiss before dinner," he told her, "and run your hands through my hair, okay?"

So he kissed his wife's sweet lips and enjoyed the feel of her soft hands threading through his curls. Oh yes, he really took pleasure in it as much as she did.

Author's note 2: I hope you will enjoy this new journey, as Sherlock learns about Molly's thoughts about him and responds to them. I hope too that you enjoy the beginning and ending scenes that take place outside of the diary.

As I stated in my initial author's note, I would love to see feedback from readers on this. Are you intrigued by the unique way I am writing this story? Your feedback is my "tip" for the many hours I spend in making a story fit to publish. Any tip is gratefully received, although I particularly appreciate the big tips where people respond to my questions and offer their thoughts on different parts of each chapter! When you decline to comment on the stories you read, it's a bit like saying "no tip for you!" So please give that some thought when you are enjoying the fruits of someone else's labours, (that means the other authors you read as well).