AN: AHHH WHERE DID ALL THIS ANGST COME FROM?!

Okay, so I heard this free audio on YouTube that I would recommend you all watch: Free Audio / I'm Not Nobody . And then it filled me with Liper angst set after HoO.

So, I'm a Liper/Jeyna shipper but this could be meant as platonic or romantic, whichever you prefer. And be warned: it's super angsty. I cried while writing this, ngl.

Piper had begged, screamed, cried and thrown a temper tantrum. But the Gods, her friends, and Chiron were not going to allow it. She wanted a visit to the Underworld. Just once. Just to say goodbye. But they wouldn't allow it. Because dead people were meant to stay dead and dead people didn't talk to living people. It was a ridiculous concept. They had the opportunity to keep in contact with dead people! They were just one weird boat ride away! But nobody took advantage of it, which was stupid. Plain stupid.

Eventually she'd given up. She stopped begging and screaming and crying. She stopped throwing temper tantrums and the subject was dropped. But she ended up pushing everyone away for a while. She knew her friends would be there for her, but... she felt like they were the ones who wouldn't let her talk to him. They were the ones who wouldn't let her go to visit him, and for that, she resented them. She told them all that she needed a break from everything, from everyone. She told Jason she needed a break to. That she needed some time alone.

When a child dies, it's not uncommon for the parents to split up. After Leo's death, Piper just couldn't bring herself to find the energy to keep a relationship going. She didn't know what that meant for the future of her relationship.

Since she wasn't allowed to the underworld, however, she had to find some other means to talk to him. She done some research into different cultural beliefs. She asked Nico to summon his ghost - which he wouldn't - and she'd even asked a local church pastor if prayer would help. After all the advice she got, she could only try one thing.

One rainy Wednesday she crept into a church, dripping wet. She wore skinny jeans and a black hoodie, that was stuck to her head and neck with rain. She didn't have an umbrella, so that weak fabric hood had to do the deed. Although, her hair still managed to get soaked in the process. She dropped her bag by the door and walked up to the alter. Churches were open 24/7 for people to practise their faith whenever. She pulled out a lighter and lit a few candles, her expression cold and unfeeling.

She paused for about five minutes afterwards before speaking. "I'm a Cherokee daughter of an Ancient Greek Goddess," she mused. "I don't think Christianity's entirely for me..."

She'd meant to open with a joke, but it hadn't worked.

"I don't know if you can hear me," she whispered after a minute. "But I needed to try something. The thing is... I don't really know where to start."

She paused for a long time, watching the flames dance around, and listening to the sound of rain on the stain glass windows. "I guess I just wanted to say that, um," she started again, almost choking on her words. "I'm not nobody." She knew what she meant by that, but she doubted Leo, or anyone else who was listening would. "I have opinions," she said. "I have family, and friends. I know happiness, and I know love. I can fight and I can be weak. And sometimes, I can be mean. Sometimes, I can be stupid.

"But I'm not nobody."

There was another pause. Her eyebrows were high, stopping herself from crying but also plastering a look of pride on her face. Her jaw was set as she tried to stay strong, and she felt a little like Reyna. Then she decided that that wasn't a bad thing at all. She refused to look at the flame after that, feeling as though she was looking him in the eye, and she didn't want that. She couldn't do that without crying. How come whenever she saw a fire nowadays, she felt like she was looking him right in the eye?

"You sat there and told me nobody wanted you. You always said that nobody cared," she continued, thoughtfully. "That you were alone. That you were the seventh wheel. You said that you had nobody. And you died... thinking that you had nobody."

Her voice choked up and her lips pressed together to stifle a sob. She finally blinked and felt a tear roll down her cheek. "You had me," she whispered, her voice weak and squeaky. "You had me," she repeated, this time stronger, clearer and with more determination. And some more tears. "I fought for you," she continued. "I loved you. I was there for you. But to you, I guess I was so irrelevant that I classified as nobody."

She paused to wipe the tears from her face and swallow a sob.

"You were never irrelevant to me," she continued. "You never counted as nobody to me. You were important and you were there for me, and you fought for me. I guess you didn't feel the same way about me as I did for you. I don't see where I became nobody. In my eyes I'm not nobody. In my eyes I'm somebody, and I'm somebody important. And I matter."

"So when you told me nobody wants you," she whispered. "That hurts. But you didn't listen to me then. So maybe, if you hear me now, you'll understand. I fought for you everyday, I thought about you every day, I wondered how you were doing," she continued. "Because I can't be there with you all the time. But that doesn't mean I'm nobody."

She took a deep breath and tried to control her breathing. She shook slightly and she wondered if she was scared or cold or angry. Maybe all three. "I am not nobody," she declared. "So do not tell me nobody wanted you. Because I wanted you."

AN: Please review! It only takes seconds and it means a lot! -Izzy