Hello. My name is Faux Reves. ...well, no. That's not really it, but due to the fact that I am a very paranoid person, you all will only ever know me by Faux Reves. That is a done deal. Carrying on, I am very bored. So, to ease that boredom I will randomly situate myself into the One Piece verse because for some unimportant reason, I have that power. So here I go:

...I am in the One Piece verse now, if you haven't already guessed. Oh, lookie there! Zoro's pointing his sword at my neck! (Not really, I'm just sitting in front of a computer. But for the sake of this fic, let's just pretend this is actually happening.)

"The hell you want?" Zoro grunts.

"I want you to take your sword away from my neck, as I am very, very afraid of being pricked to death by a pointy metal object." Zoro narrows his eyes, "And honestly, that is quite rude of you. I drop by for a chat and the first thing you do is try to kill me. Not really hospitable are you? Anyways where's Sanji? Shouldn't he be here to save me already?"

Zoro was about to retort something or another but what kicked aside by a black boot...I was soo surprised. (Yeah, right. Like none of us knew that one was coming.)

"You lawn-head! How dare you threaten a beautiful angel with that rusty old knife of yours!" Sanji screamed. He was starting quite the commotion, and soon the rest of the Strawhats found their way to me as well.

They all began to talk at once, except for Robin who walked off after coming to the assumption that I wasn't important enough to waste precious time on (What a bitch.) and Chopper who was trying to hid behind the mast. (What an idiot...but cute...and fluffy...but still an idiot...I wanna make him cry...)

Everyone was really loud, it was getting annoying, so I finally snapped. "Shut up already!"

That did the trick. The crew turned to stare at me in surprise. Finally Nami asked a logical question. "Who are you?"

"...I don't know. I just...was here..." I replied, pitifully.

"You mean you have amnesia!" Chopper cried from behind the mast, before squeaking fearfully and trying to go back into hiding.

"No." I stated curtly. "I lied. But I figured that I might as well make this boring and totally clichéd fic original, so for the sake of not boring the readers and me getting some reviews, let's pretend I have amnesia."

"Okay!" Luffy laughed, "...but what's amnesia?"

I started to laugh, "You're more of an idiot in real life!" (Well, not really real life, it's more like a bunch of letters on Microsoft Works Word Processor since I don't want to pay for the Microsoft Word 2010 license and I can't find the file for the free Microsoft Word 2003...but again, for the sake of the story let's pretend this is all really happening.)

"Let's try this again." Nami said, "You, who I'm quite sure does not have amnesia, will tell us who you are, where you came from, and what you intend to do. While I, who am assuming that this is just a failing parody fanfiction and utterly a waste of my time (What a bitch.) am going to go to my cabin and work on my maps. Goodbye. Don't mess things up."

With a wave Nami walked off leaving me in the midst of seven men(ish folk).

"Well?" Zoro grunted.

"You're really mean." I snapped, then looking to Franky, Ussop, and Brook who were just staring blankly because I did not yet give them any purpose in this fic said, "If you all must know. I'm Faux Reves. I am a fanfic writer because I have no life, and I figured I might as well conform to the unoriginality of www . fanfiction . com / anime/ one_piece and write a self-insertion fic."

"What do you get from this." I made Ussop ask.

"...reviews?"

The crew, mainly Franky and Brook because they haven't had any action in this fic yet, were about to say something but I interrupted them, "Anyways. I'm getting bored again and am losing my plot bunnies. I was planning on making you guys fall in love with, and naming me the Supreme Empress of you Universe because I have all-powerful...powers...but I'm too lazy for that. So, yeah. I'm going to end it here instead."

"What! You can't do that! It's not fair to what minute amount of readers you have!" Franky exclaimed, slightly out of character.

And just for the sake of the whole sharing is caring rule, Brook bellowed, "May I see your panties!" Which was totally in character for him, except for the bellow. Not sure why he bellowed. I guess I just chose that word cuz I like the sound of bellow. Bel Low. Beeee Looooowwwww. BE- LOW. BELOWWWWW! HELOOOO BELOWWWW! ...yeahhh...

And so, without another moment to waste I left the One Piece verse through means unimportant for this story. Alas, I was faced with the grim reality that I still have an English test on Monday but luckily have three days to study for it, but I won't be studying since I am a lazy idiot. Fortunately, back in the One Piece verse the Strawhat Pirates had named me Supreme Empress of their Universe and were trying to spread my message of Supreme Awesomeness to the rest of the seas. (Don't bother asking me why. I'm the author of this fic. I rule, so my rules.)

The End

...meh...I'm still bored. D:

Ooooh! I'll go make the toddlers in my living room cry! That's always fun!