Equivalent Exchange
Summary: If you had the chance to give the ones you love the life they deserved, to take their pains and all you had to do was give up your life for eternal hell. It'd be worth it.
Authors Note: I'm sad, and I'm feeling angsty. I couldn't get this out of my head, and I still can't get over Damian's death. So I'm putting you all through my misery. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: Do not own.
Pain. Flashes of pictures.
Please.
Blood, so much blood.
Please.
Crying, a deep heaving sob that escapes a once infallible man and dark blue eyes that would never open. Crying that he never thought he'd hear. Eyes he'd thought he would watch grow in understanding and wonderment.
Please help them.
Dark blue eyes in regret, so much guilt, so much pain. Another set of blue, deep sea and almost green looks back in anger.
Anything.
The small body covered, so tiny.
Give him back, help them. Anything, I'll give you anything.
So dark, eyes so dark, filled with grief. The light slowly receding back.
Tired light blue eyes aged with more grief.
My life.
The scene is so familiar, how many coffins has he watched go down into a hole so far away from him? His parents, Jason's, Bruce's...Damian's. All polished and so heavy. The weight piled on his shoulders. He holds himself back, wanting so much to follow them. He anchors himself with the light touch on his shoulder, reminding him of the people he had left. People he still had to look out but…
But it's too hard. It's too hard to be the one always left behind.
My memories.
Barbara's beautiful red hair in the sun, Bruce's rare smiles something that could light the whole night, Jason's innocent laughter as he puts on the Robin suit the first time. Tim's large blue eyes filled with trust and love, the attention he deserved finally given to him as Bruce signs the adoption papers. Alfred's hand on his shoulder, a strong pillar of encouragement, Stephanie, the sister he could laugh with, to joke with, to share hugs with, and Cassandra, sweet Cassandra an innocent child that he slowly watched learning to live her life. All of them. He'd give all of those memories up.
Everything, just please.
Give him back, erase their pain, and put me through endless hell, just please.Help them.Take me.
Blue eyes opened to light and soon soft laughter, the visions change. The sight of them in a line, smiles on their faces. And he knows, it's worth everything.
Let them live their life. Take everything from me. I'll give it all up.
My parents, my memories, my friends. My life. Please.
This is all I can give you.
Please. Please…I'm begging you.
Everything…
Pain. Eternal pain.
An answer.
Okay.
An endless golden field. A little boy stands in the middle and he walks a step closer seeing the familiar scowl etched with confusion. He stands in front of him now.
"Damian…" He raises a fading hand to touch the boy. Blue meets blue and he looks back at confused eyes.
"Who are you…?" The boy questions and he lets out a small choked laugh. So much relief sags his shoulders and yet laced with so much pain.
"No one." He answers back and then he feels himself fade before…
…darkness.
And hell waits for him.
He embraces it with a bloody smile.
Thank you…
END.