Edward Hates That They Stare

Summary: May's Millirific Challenge was to Gender-Bender your character. What can I say? Edward Cullen was less enthoused than most with the idea, but not so much on his family's side.

Holy Fuc- What?

Edward Cullen is a vampire.

And in his world this means many things.

But at this moment, it means one specific thing. The fact that Edward is blinking his eyes and the ceiling is coming into focus is that somehow, someway someone or something happened to make him unconscious.

A feat that should be utterly impossible.

But ranks lower in impossibility than suddenly realizing he has breasts.

The first concise thing he does after it happens is go home. (The first few things that were not concise and preplanned had taken the better part of half a day's panic in Milliways.)

He burst through the door to Alice's room, saying, "It's me."

Only to find her perched on the end of her bed, smiling far too widely for innocence of any kind, "I know."

Edward, small and thin and slight, lighted on the bed next to her, just as the door shot open again. "Alice, is everything-" And then Carlisle was left gaping at a new unknown vampire in his house, glancing at her. His gaze taking in only the position of her hands and the tilt of her head and the color of her hair before choking out, "Edward?"

Edward wasn't sure whether he even liked the idea Carlisle paid that much attention to the smallest details of him. Apparently there was something in the face he made, too. Furrowing his eyebrows and firming his lips, both thinner and shapely delicately like bows. That caused "How - wh- it is you."

Carlisle had only gotten so far as thinking he wanted to make sure Edward was alright before, Alice blurted out against a vision of a Doctor Session. "No. I want to play dress up with him-" She stuttered, uncertainly making face toward the necessity of pronouns for this event. "-her, first."

"I'm still here." Edward frowned, daintily, at both of them. "And I'm not going anywhere with either of you. I want to know when this will end."

As Carlisle's bent with telepathy only took a few days.

Alice went from looking like he'd stolen her best birthday present to unpleasantly trying then her face went blank. He watched the vision swirl and shift across the future. Unsteady pieces. But then there were clips. Her fingers, the clip of his hair against his cheeks.

Edward swore, soft as a sweet whisper, as Alice answered for Carlisle's sake now.

"It will, but not for a while."