3rd Person POV:

Today is going to be an entertaining day for one Harry Potter.

He and the love of his life, Ginny Weasley, decided to send letters their friends, asking them kindly to meet at the Leaky Cauldron pub today at noon to make a big announcement. Together, holding hands, we walk down the busy streets of the muggle's side of London, with the sun shining behind the semi-cloudy sky. Up ahead and sandwiches between the most ordinary stores in London lays the entrance to a famous yet disgusting pub, but like the first time the couple came down this street, no one else on the street pays it any attention, most likely since they can't see it. Even though all is well, the duo would occasionally look behind my shoulder to see if someone is following them, Harry especially.

After all, it has only been a year since the Second Wizarding War occurred against the Dark Lord Voldemort, a war which nearly took over Magical Britain and inevitable shaped the fate of the whole world. Fortunately, as a result of the Battle of Hogwarts and many sacrifices, not only did he die for good, but the Death Eaters who didn't secede from their evil way were thrown into Azkaban and every innocent person who was thrown in there were immediately released. Right now, aside from what is about to happen, Harry is excited since he is about to get something that he hasn't really gotten in a long time; how to get let loose.

Harry swings open the door to the pub and Ginny walks right in with a nod of gratitude, Harry following. Like every other time they have been inside, it is full to the brim with seedy-looking witches and wizards having drinks or eating some weird food like usual. And Harry could have sworn he saw an eyeball inside of a cup that an old man with his cloak pulled down so far his face is shadowed is drinking from. "Hey, over here." A familiar voice calls out. He takes his attention away from and look to the corner and notice, to my delight, my best friend Ron Weasley sitting there, along with his older twin brothers Fred and George Weasley, Neville Longbottom and Draco Malfoy. After He saved Draco's sorry ass from the Fiendfyre, they decided to at least try and be friends. While there are some rough points where they bicker, it has actually worked out better than either of them expected. On the opposite side of the room, all of Ginny's friends, composed of Hermione Granger, Luna Lovegood, Hannah Abbot and Susan Bones, are also waiting with curious looks, no doubt wondering what this big news is. Letting go of Ginny's hand, they both go to our separate tables to talk with our friends.

"So, what's this big news you were talking about, Harry? Tell us, mate, tell us." Ron asked, eagerness in his voice. Contrary to popular belief, he's struggled through life with his older brothers and never really had friends before their first ride to Hogwarts, being stuck at home pretty much all day, every day. This includes Draco as well, but on a much more serious degree.

Harry sits down at the head of the table and takes several deep breaths. He then waves his re-formed Phoenix wand to cast a privacy ward, since the whole pub doesn't need to hear what's going to happen. If they did, no doubt the paparazzi would come after Harry again. After many years of wrangling with the truth, he now admits it; the paparazzi suck, each one fawning over each word he says like people listening to the goddamn Pope's words. This, among other reasons, is why Dumbledore sent Harry to the Dursleys, though he still holds a twinge of resentment over the decision.

"Alright, I will cut to the chase. Ginny and I... we are getting married." Harry states to the group, a smile forming. They stare at him as if their friend has grown a second head, but then started patting him on the back.

"Congratulations, mate. I wish you the best." Neville said, smiling happily. Harry can't help but mentally wince as he remembers that same giddiness after getting deeply injured from his time as a student under the Carrow siblings, who were really nasty Death Eaters hired to teach the younger generation the Death Eater's views. Thankfully, they are trapped in Azkaban now along with the vile Delores Umbridge.

"So, where are you getting married at?" Draco asked, curiosity on that topic getting the better of him.

This is going to be the part that will be entertaining. "Because we have spent so much time in Britain, we decided we need to have a change in scenery. In three days, we're going to get married in North America in a place called California."

Everyone in the group looks honestly surprised by what Harry had also said, but nod their heads in understanding. Then they all start grinning widely. "We're heading to the beaches, right? I've heard from Dad that California has some real nice beaches." George said, a dreamy look on his face. Fred nods, also looking happy. Such looks are rare since the last Wizarding War, when Fred nearly got killed, he would be dead if he didn't notice the curse coming at him. Now they still joke around a lot, but they are now much more wary.

"Yeah, and you know what that means, mates. It's party time!" Ron nearly shouts, before Draco harshly shushes him. After all, one with the power of magic can truly do remarkable things.

"Yes. I think that given all of the stress that we have been under, I think that having some fun for the next few days would be nice. But don't take this the wrong way; just because Ginny and I will be committed doesn't mean that we won't get to hang out. We will still be able to go to Quidditch matches every Friday night, and we will still be able to live out our lives as we see fit." Harry replies, getting that off his chest.

They all look very relived to hear that piece of news. "Well, what are we waiting on? Let's get this show on the road." Ron says excitedly. Even Neville looks eager to get going. Once Harry disables the small protection ward, they all get up and walk out of the Leaky Cauldron. By that point, Ginny has also finished going over our plans with the girls as they also got up and are walking towards the door as well.

The group walks out the backdoor and head into Diagon Alley. Once the group makes their way to a side-alleyway, they apparate out of the Alley, all of them holding hands in case one of their crew is inexperienced with the process. They arrive to the Burrow, where Harry is temporarily staying until he can properly inherit Potter Manor. As they enter the house, Harry and Ginny are greeted by the bear-like embrace of Mrs. Weasley.

Meanwhile, back at Diagon Alley and under the table where Harry and his friends sat, an artificial ear is pulled out via invisible string and towards a nearby table where eight cloaked figures are sitting around. Once the ear is in one of the people's hands, they make their way up to their room upstairs and sit down on the beds. They fling their hoods back, revealing several of the soon-to-be couple's most hated people: Ginny's ex-boyfriends, Michael Corner and Dean Thomas, Seamus Finnigan, Pansy Parkinson, Lavender Brown, the muscle of the group Gregory Goyle, their make-shift leader Justin Finch-Fletchly, and Harry Potter's ex-girlfriend Cho Chang. "I knew it. That fool thinks he can stick his dick into any girl he wants; well, we'll see about that." Justin says, anger and a hint of lunacy on his face. He has always despised Harry's ways, seeing him as that arrogant asshole who does whatever he wants and gets off scot-free; and after years of being punished for things Harry did, like getting petrified by a basilisk or getting tortured by the Carrows throughout his seventh year at Hogwarts certainly didn't help matters. He wants nothing more than to see Harry to be that crazy, lonely old man no-one likes.

Dean and Cho look at each other incredulously. They dated each side of the to-be couple, and while the duo didn't exactly have the best times with Harry or Ginny, they certainly agree that their former dates don't deserve to be on the receiving end of a romance-loving Justin.

"So, what do we plan on doing?" Michael Corner asks curiously. Out of the whole group, he is the most neutral of the beliefs. Although he does believe Ginny can do better than being with someone like Harry Potter.

"It's simple. We're going to follow them to this California, ending that madness and saving my Draco." Pansy answers, a determined look on her face. She wouldn't normally take part in this, but since Draco's been hanging out with Harry more often and has started to show feelings for one of the guests at the upcoming wedding, a younger woman named Astoria Greengrass, Pansy is now an avid supporter of Justin's new-found delusions.

"So, Revengers, it's settled. Who's with me, aye or nay!"

"Uh, which one means yes?" Goyle asks, scratching his head in confusion.

Justin lets out a sigh while staring at the ceiling in exasperation. "Aye."

"Aye!" Everyone shouts enthusiastically, though Dean and Cho are only halfheartedly, disbelieving that this is actually happening and genuinely dreading what is about to happen next.

AN: Welcome to the revamped version of a wild story I came up with a while ago; and yes, this is my one and (most likely) only actual crack-fic. My take on Harry Potter in a story that could possibly follow canon and have partying in it.

Just to be clear, this will kind of be a mish-mash of Tom Hanks films and concepts, rolled into this. I really do hope you enjoy this.

I will see you next time when the gangs go to California, and meet a certain surfer and motorcyclist from two of my personal favorite comedies of all times.

Revised: 18/3/27