Author's Note:
Hey guys! It is Rucha here (AKA Infinite Snow) and I want to tell you that I am working on another story which had been abandoned for a YEAR. People are still flooding me with lots of support and constantly asking about an update. And good news, I am working on the next chapter. So, stay tuned in for that!
My one-shots are now more geared towards all the shit I have to go through every day to day life. And if you guys read my previous one-shot, it was about body shaming and bullying.
Some people left really nice reviews and some private messaged me. They told me how they felt like this one-shot fit their life perfectly or they could relate to it in some way and I was happy that I am not in this all alone. You guys are so sweet and I want to say, I hope you guys find your Ikuto. I really do. For the guys, don't go for girls who try too hard on their appearances. Sometimes the girl who is the one for you is the one who might be the most imperfect. Love isn't perfect and it isn't those cheesy love at first sight and sorry to bash on you Shakespeare, but a boy and girl won't always look at one another, be mesmerized by the physical attraction and then madly fall in love. It isn't what life is like.
This one-shot is based on love. I have had a couple of crushes on guys. And girls can relate: they just don't notice you back. You spend forever just chasing after them but you feel like the school is the hierarchy system.
He is the Prince and you are the Freak. And a freak and a prince do not mix. It isn't socially acceptable by the students of the school.
I had a crush in middle school and he was just too charming and all the glitter around his head made him blind to the fact that that I liked him. We go to different high schools so I haven't seen him in four years. I also have a crush on a guy who is the PRESIDENT of two big clubs I am in my high school. Like my middle school crush, he is just full of himself and pompous and arrogant because he has his own elite friends and he will never know that the girls who are his 'friends' are those who only hang out with him just because he has a shot at becoming valedictorian. However, I do have a best friend who had been there every single moment for me ever since 9th grade. And I feel something for him, but he is too friendly to notice. But who knows, he acts a lot nicer around me than others.
Here is me and my one-shot about unrequited love. And if you DO relate, please leave a review about it. Even if you are a guest, I will moderate and accept the review! Tell me your story as well! Letting it out is much better than bottling it up.
-x-
"Meeting adjourned!" Tadase charmingly smiled. Girls swooned at the site of the club president.
Amu, on the other hand, wasn't amused. She would leave just to see the prick's face in another club. Tadase was to be the valedictorian, and was in a neck to neck competition with Nagihiko for the position. Nagihiko was another attractive yet cocky person who treated girls like trash.
The pinkette had to admit, she did like Nagihiko's appearance, it was just sad that his attitude didn't complement his physical appearance.
Tadase, on the other hand, was charming, wealthy, smart, and very royal in his actions. But Tadase played dirty to get all of the leadership positions he earned. He rigged votes, claiming it to be a 'recount'. And thus, potential candidates lost. Rima was the one who lost her position as President of Student Council, as Tadase deemed it unfit for a woman to be in such a high position, so he rigged the vote and made himself the president.
And when Rima tried to protest, Tadase humiliated her in such a way over social media that she never ran for a leadership position ever again.
"I wonder why I still like him," Amu shook her head.
"What was that?" Ikuto teased as he caught up with the pinkette, "Is someone daydreaming about me?"
"Pfft you wish," Amu puffed her cheeks, obviously irritated.
"Why what happened?" Ikuto asked, concerned.
"I want to rip pretty boy's face off," Amu grumbled, "He is so charming and likable, but now I know what a cheat he really is, I want to just shoot him."
"Don't we all? To be honest, Rima would make a better president," Ikuto rolled his eyes, shoving his hands into his pocket.
"Tadase is so anti-feminist, honestly! Would it ruin his reputation for letting a female to have a leadership position?" Amu sighed.
"Knowing it is a desirable one and this is Tadase, then yes," Ikuto shrugged.
"He has his way with girls that it is so irritating," Amu grumbled, jerking her thumb at Tadase, "You forget why you are angry at him in the first place when he smiles at you."
"That guy has charm just oozing off of him," Ikuto rolled his eyes, "He isn't worth your time."
"I keep telling myself that," Amu shook her head, "His charm is too strong."
Ikuto frowned, but kept following the pinkette outside the school.
-x-
Amu rolled her eyes when English rolled around the next day. It would be the one class she has with Tadase and to be honest, she doesn't like having any classes with him.
Yes, it is shocking. When you have a crush, you would want to have all eight of your classes with him. You would want to sit next to him, slip him a love letter. Maybe he might look back at you and maybe he might confess he has a crush on you. Maybe he might buy chocolates and roses for you and slip it in your locker. Maybe he might ask you out.
Not in Amu's case.
Sure, she likes Tadase a lot, but she sure doesn't like being portrayed as a stupid oaf in front of her English teacher when the class is studying Shakespeare's works.
Shakespeare is so hard to understand, and even though Hamlet is very interesting, it is hard to understand without No Fear Shakespeare from Sparknotes!
"Let's go over Shakespeare vocabulary!" The teacher said, as the class was doing an introductory unit to Hamlet before reading the play.
There was a chorus of groans and Amu would've joined their silent synchronization, hadn't the teacher pinned them down with a piercing gaze, searching for a guinea pig to pick on.
"Hinamori, you seem like you are more enthusiastic than the rest of the class. Tell me, do you know what Shakespeare meant by soft?" The teacher asked.
Soft? Like as in, cotton candy, velvet, silky soft?
"Uh… does it mean fluffy?" Amu asked, scratching the back of her head. The classmates stifled their giggles as the teacher glared at them to quiet down.
"No, it is not. Pity, because I actually thought you read the editor's notes," the teacher sighed, "Hotori-san, you know possibly?"
"Yes, sensei, it means to wait," Tadase flashed a charming smile at the teacher, secretly smirking at Amu in amusement.
Amu frowned. What a prick.
-x-
"I swear he humiliated me in front of the whole class! And even he didn't know the answer to the question!" Amu took a bite of her sandwich.
"How would you know?" Rima asked.
"He… googled it on his iPhone when the teacher asked him," Amu said.
"But how? The teacher praised him didn't she?" Ikuto asked.
"When I was struggling to answer, he quickly looked it up. And then he quickly raised his hand when the teacher looked for someone to correct me," Amu sighed, "He is just looking for every moment to humiliate me."
And suddenly, the cafeteria doors opened to show Tadase surrounded by his typical clique. Not the hot football players or the slutty cheerleaders you would typically think of in this case. No, in this case, they were all smart people with near perfect GPA and had several leadership positions. They stuck with each other and they didn't really truly interact with anyone outside of their little petty 'circle'.
"What prats," Amu rolled her eyes, "They are only charming when it comes to merit."
"I am still not over what he did to me last year," Rima glared at Tadase so hatefully that the blonde quickly looked away after their eyes locked.
"He still remembers. That's good," Amu chewed the last bit of her sandwich.
"He better remember," Rima huffed, "That prissy boy cost me my position that I deserved."
-x-
Amu could hear her teachers always droning on and on about how amazing Tadase is, how charming he is, how helpful he is, and how he gets classwork done.
"Well your test grades came in," the teacher created mystery as the seniors awaited the grades on their AP Macroeconomics test.
"Not good!" The teacher bellowed.
Hushed, worried whispers filled the room. Students silently wept and prayed to the gods at the mercy of their grades. The idea almost made Amu snort. And to think girls would usually pray to God for a boyfriend.
It turned out Amu did surprisingly well. An 83… including a ten point curve. Amu slumped back into her seat as she wanted to just dig a hole and hid herself.
"Sir, who got the highest grade?" A girl asked.
"Tadase Hotori, at a 95, not including the curve," the teacher grumbled.
"Psst, Amu! What did you get?" Kuukai asked.
"An 83… with the curve," Amu glumly said.
"Hey that's better than mine! Wanna know my score?" Kuukai smiled big.
"What was it? Did you fail?" Amu asked, apprehension filling her face. She hated to hear that anyone does bad in their classes, it was just her motherly instinct.
"Yup! I got a 60! Including the curve!" Kuukai exclaimed, proudly broadcasting to the whole class his failing test grade.
"Sohma-san maybe you would like to quit sharing your grades and hit the test corrections? As far as I know, a 50 (not including the ten point curve) is not something to proudly brag about," the teacher droned.
"I even wore my Macroeconomics T-Shirt…" Amu miserably sighed, as the three point wear-your-tshirt-with-pride extra credit did little to help her grade. She really got a 70.
-x-
Amu sighed, tossing and turning in bed at ten o'clock at night. She didn't get it; why did she like Tadase despite him being better than her in every aspect in every fricking annoying way?
Even though she knew his charms were fake as hell, why did she like it?
Tadase's name to Amu's lips and mind were like venom. His face made the pinkette want to bury him into the mud of a pig's pen. She wanted to flip him the middle finger whenever he spoke because, red flag, he sounded a lot more like Tinker Bell when he spoke. All you need to do is dress him up in the get up and you wouldn't know the difference.
But why did she like him despite the fact that she knew she hated him?
"I told myself he is just a fake person," Amu whispered, "Then why do I have feelings for him?"
Amu shrugged her shoulders. She could just pass it off for those other silly crushes she had throughout her life.
Like once, she had an elementary crush on this really skinny boy with a baby face and dark hair. The one thing that attracted her to him was his wide, unblinking eyes. He always stared at Amu and whenever the pinkette snuck a glance at him, he was always there in the line of her vision, not doing anything but staring at her.
Amu would have Rima 'talk' to him and convey messages between them during recess. And every day Rima fed lies, too hesitant to stomp on Amu's love-love fantasy, how much he loved her and admired her by afar. But Rima cracked when Amu suspected of the messages of being too cheesy and too fake that she had been lying all along.
Then she had a crush on a guy who was liked by the whole school population. He played the cello in middle school's orchestra. But his higher level friends made sure that Amu never interacted or even talked to him. Amu never got to confess to her crush before they went to separate high schools. She never heard from him again.
Then in high school, she developed a crush on Nagihiko Fujisaki who was comically funny but almost as much of a dirty cheat as Tadase is. Together, he and the blonde rigged the votes and made sure Rima and Yaya weren't the president and vice-president of student council. Amu, though, made the next highest chair of secretary, but she felt bad for those two girls.
She even had a bit of a crush on Ikuto, but Ikuto was too oblivious because he was so preoccupied in his hobby of going to Juliard and becoming a world renowned violinist that he would never know that she likes him.
Then finally, she had a crush on Tadase, the annoying prince and crack-head who had a façade of a charming personality when in reality he is a dirty player who uses others for personal gain.
"I honestly don't like that boy, not one bit!" Tsumugu ranted at family dinner.
"Why not dad?" Amu asked.
"If you like the boy, I understand; I mean it is young love and everything-" Tsumugu started to blabber but Amu cut him off.
"I don't like his attitude much either, dad. It is fine. What don't you like about him at all?" Amu asked, smiling reassuringly.
"Like father, like son!" Tsumugu huffed, "His father and I are colleagues."
"What?" Amu asked astonished.
"His father is such a dirty cheat that he placed me in trouble so many times. He also sugar coats his words as well. I mean if you have something to say, then say it! Don't go into circles!" Tsumugu yelled.
"Honey! No yelling!" Midori hushed her husband.
"Sorry, it is just, if his son is like that, all fake on the outside and a dirty malicious brat on the inside, don't worry. I have to deal with one brat at work as well five days a week," Tsumugu frowned.
"And I was the one who thought he was a fake person," Amu snorted, "Thanks dad."
"I never liked him. And I met his son once. Seemed bratty instead of impressive," Tsumugu snorted, "It's alright if you hate him."
I do, but I like him at the same time.
-x-
"A-Ano, Hotori-kun?" A shy girl called out Tadase.
Amu stopped in her tracks and looked at the scene happening right around the corner. It was lunch period, so she could spy to her heart's desire.
"Yes?" Tadase charmingly smiled, with fake sparkles flying around his head with such velocity that you thought a unicorn threw up on him.
"I-I like you. I t-thought you would feel the same way t-too…" the girl shyly handed him an envelope with a heart-shaped sticker on the lip of the flap.
Amu's hands clenched. Even though she knew that the girl fantasized as much as she did for having a knight in shining armor, it is all fake and the fairytale is always a lie.
To the girl's and also Amu's, Tadase didn't even bother to open the letter and at least read it. He ripped it apart into two pieces and handed it back to the shocked girl.
"It took me hours to write that letter!" The girl wailed.
"So your long handwritten letter is more important than the fact I am rejecting you? You don't want to even know why?" Tadase's face twisted into a cold, cruel smirk.
"You didn't even bother to read my letter. You were too preoccupied with rejecting me on the spot!" The girl spat.
"So if you knew that, why did you write me such a long letter?" Tadase asked nonchalantly.
The girl stayed quiet.
"I have more important things to do, you know. I have to become valedictorian. I am this close to becoming it. I have to go to an Ivy League college and become a doctor with a Ph.D. I have to become wealthy and buy a mansion. I don't have time for girls," Tadase shrugged.
"What about the unfortunate girl you will have to marry?" The girl coldly snapped.
Tadase gave the girl a cold, hard stare. The girl snapped her mouth shut. And then he smirked once more, satisfied with the reaction. Shoving his hands down in his pockets, he walked away, leaving the girl to go to a trash can and shred the letter into tinier bits until it was a pile of indistinguishable rubbish.
Amu had to admit, her heart kind of broke when the girl dumped her love letter into the trash can. The girl squared her shoulders, clenched her fists, and muttered some profanities about Tadase before storming off.
Amu looked down. She had been chasing and vying and fighting for the attention of a boy who couldn't love her the way she wanted to.
In a sense, she saved herself from heartbreak, but it left her heart in a vulnerable position.
She wasted four years of high school loving a boy who was incapable of loving a girl. Suddenly she felt naked.
-x-
End notes:
Yes, Amu is representing me. And the following things in the one-shot are from my day to day life:
1) I did have a crush in elementary school, one in middle school and three in high school. The descriptions about the elementary and middle school crush are 100% accurate.
2) I am a senior. Class of 2016!
3) The boy I used to crush on rigged the votes for what he called a 'recount' and stole two leadership positions in two clubs that one of my best friends won.
4) My dad and my ex-crush's father are colleagues currently.
5) I do have a best friend who I currently do have a crush on. He doesn't want to become a violinist. He is a violist. And orchestra is his hobby. He doesn't want to full-time invest in music, just as a hobby.
6) My ex-crush has a façade of a princely charm that melts the teachers and he does have his own snooty clique of all the smart people who are also smart people.
7) My ex-crush coldly rejected a girl's confession. It was then my head cleared from my blindness and I finally saw who he was deep down inside: a sadistic person incapable of love.
8) My ex-crush once got the highest grade on a hard science test and my teacher gloated about it. I got a flat B with the ten point curve. One of my classmates did try to cheer me up by telling me he still failed even with the curve. It didn't work, but he had a kind heart.
Well, I hope you girls can relate to loving a guy who never loved you back. Because I got you covered! Send me requests about general topics you want me to cover, like: depression, suicidal thoughts, anorexia, etc. Big problems that I should write about, you know shed light on.
I do not want to make fun of it, and I do not want people to pity me. I have been depressed for years, I have thought of killing myself, and once when the body shaming had gone too far, I became anorexic for a while. Tell me if you want a one-shot on a serious problem that society ought to pay more attention to, and I can see if I can manage it in my time.
Love,
Infinite Snow (AKA – Rucha)