Oh, how am I gonna get myself back home?

I, I, I…

How am I gonna get myself back home?

I, I…

I'm lost.

Bastille-Get Home

"What, exactly, are you trying to tell me Rico?" Merlin snapped, voice hard and humorless as he listened to the woman on the other end of the phone. Halfway through the story Merlin found himself taking off his glasses and placing them in his lap. His fingers dug sharply into the bridge of his nose, as if that would help alleviate some of the pressure that was building in his head.

"I understand," he replied, voice losing it's edge and a bit of it's strength. "I suppose I'm going to have to make some upgrades on the sensitivity then," he swallowed and then continued, barely able to get out the words. "I'm going to call in that favor you owe me." A tired smile twisted his mouth at the indignant reply.

"Aye, I know it doesn't seem worth it to you, but you don't get to decide what I call a favor in for," he answered, then listened again, removing his hand from his face and replacing his glasses.

"I understand that as well. Should be about six days, ahh no, seven days?" he paused and then scowled, furiously typing on his iPad with one hand. "A fortnight? Rico, you can't be serious?" His typing stopped as he glared at the device in his hand, listening to the woman on the other line.

"Alright...alright it makes sense. Be careful will you? We're still reeling on our side, and I need this favor more than you can imagine," Merlin admitted grudgingly. He sighed at her next question.

"Five...uhh four, then. You?" he asked, voice barely concealing the pain at his answer. An eyebrow shot up in surprise at the reply.

"How the bloody hell did you manage that?" Merlin exclaimed in shock, then allowed a small flush of pleasure to wash over his features. "Thank god for that then. I'm glad the message got out before all hell broke loose. Was that your call? No, of course it was. You're damn good Rico, I'll give you that."

Merlin listened to her speak for a few more moments, fingers still flying across the iPad as he made arrangements. This was going to change everything about the next few months and he had a lot of planning and calculations to make. It was going to be a very busy, and a very hard year on all the Kingsmen. Some more than others.

He spared a brief glance behind him. Eggsy and Roxy were both curled up in the plush chairs, and both of them were asleep. He could hear Eggsy snoring softly, mouth slightly open, glasses askew, arms and legs sprawled in a way that made his back hurt just looking at him. Roxy was much more composed, head pillowed on one arm, and tucked neatly into the chair. They had both had an incredibly hard day, and it was a long flight back to England. They both deserved the rest.

Merlin's attention snapped back to the phone and his hand stilled again. "You're a blessing Rico, you'll never know how much. I'll take the help just until we're back on our feet. I know you have a bigger mess on your hands then we do...I suppose we're back to me owing you again?" He grinned again at her reply and then shook his head.

"Good luck with the clean up...and thank you Nat, I mean it." Merlin hung up the phone, set the iPad down, and returned his gaze to the open sky in front of him.

He never drank when he flew, but in this case he'd make an exception. He always kept a small flask of scotch in the armrest of the passenger seat, usually saved for a worthy co-pilot with a good story to keep him entertained on longer flights. Merlin flicked the catch and pulled out the flask. He took a very ungentlemanly gulp (but who was looking, really?), savoring the burn as it went down. Then he replaced it and got down to business, pulling the iPad back onto his lap.

"Jesus," he breathed as he made a small adjustment to the roster in front of him. There were five names with the red Kingsman logo next to them. He lightly tapped one and it turned white again. His gaze lingered a moment longer as the name Galahad lit up, and then he replaced Deceased with Inactive-Medical Leave. Merlin doubted he would ever be happier to correct a mistake.

I held my tongue, I turn on my heels.

I couldn't look back.

I want you to know,

That you were my rock, never my stepping stone.

A Silent Film-Harbor Lights

It had been a little over two weeks since V-day and the Kingsmen were still trying to pick up the pieces. With the loss of Arthur and Galahad came the loss of three more agents, Tristan, Bedivere, and Bors. That left five open spaces that needed to be filled, and five new recruits that needed to be added to the ranks. Without the appropriate number of members to contribute candidates, and the fact that a good portion of England was still reeling from the mass genocide (although it could have been a lot worse), the options they had were very limited.

After killing Valentine and ruining his plans, Eggsy had assumed that he would have proven himself an able Kingsman...but apparently saving the world wasn't an automatic entry into the Kingsman's ranks. Meeting after meeting was held, and despite Merlin and Lancelot's assurance that they were getting somewhere with the rest of affairs, and that they'd bring up the topic of Eggsy's induction, things were at a standstill.

The most infuriating thing for Eggsy is that he knew that Merlin and Roxy were keeping things from him. A tightening of the lips, a hurried look, a sentence half started, a muttered apology...all of these things were weighing on him to the point he didn't want to even ask about how things were going anymore. If they couldn't be honest with him after all they'd been through he didn't really want to be around them.

Instead of waiting around for an answer he wasn't sure he was ever going to get, he spent most of his time using the facilities around the Kingsman's base. Merlin said he was more than welcome to use them so he made good on the offer. He took JB for walks around the yard, swam laps in the olympic sized pool until his arms and legs started to cramp, lifted weights until his muscles shook and he wasn't sure he had any more liquid in his body to sweat out. He'd spend hours in the shooting range, hitting moving targets, or stationary targets, with every type of gun he could get his hands on. When he got home at night he was too exhausted to talk to his mother or play with his sister. He'd plead a headache and then collapse into his bed, too tired most of the time to change his clothes.

All in an effort to keep from thinking about Harry Hart.

It was a wasted effort. He could no more stop thinking about Harry than he could stop breathing. When he walked JB he thought about Mr. Pickle and how Harry must have walked the same grounds with him when he was a recruit. When he swam he wondered if Harry was any good at swimming (he had never seen him). When he fired a gun, it was Harry's hand that aimed it; the target, some poor fool from the church in Kentucky. Every bloke in a black suit caused him to do a double take. Every day it rained and he saw a black umbrella a small part of him felt a little more hollow than it had a moment before, knowing it would never again be Harry underneath. Even the smallest things weighed on his mind. A dark blue striped tie. A pair of thick rimmed glasses. A pint of Guinness. A copy of The Sun. A martini, properly prepared (of course).

When he collapsed into bed at night and fell asleep it was Harry who visited him in his dreams, dying again and again in a spray of blood and shattered glass while Eggsy could do nothing. When he woke in the morning it was to find his pillow wet and eyes stinging, hating how helpless he was to stop it. Half the time he would wake up with a deep ache in his hand. When he finally unclenched his fist, it revealed the angry red Kingsman logo imprinted in his flesh as the medallion that Harry had given him to remember his father fell from his grasp.

"Eggsy, please tell me what's eating you," his mother had pleaded with him one morning as he waved away her offer of breakfast with a tired hand.

"Nothing. Don't worry about it," he assured her with a smile that he somehow managed to plaster to his face.

"Was it one of your friends babe? Did something happen to them in that awful mess?" she asked, eyes going wide as she remembered her own experience with V-Day.

"Yeah mum, something like that," he admitted but put a hand on her shoulder and smiled again, "Don't worry so much, yeah?"

His words seemed to reassure her and she smiled back. To further put her at ease he even went over to Sophie and plucked her from her spot on the floor. He started to tickle her and she shrieked in delight. That brought a real smile to his face. He knew he hadn't been around much, and Sophie missed him. Making a promise to himself to spend more time with her and less time moping about he gave her a quick kiss on the top of her head and then set her back down.

"Going out again Eggsy? You're not home a lot any more, but dinner's at five if you're hungry," his mother gave him a small smile and he surprised her by giving her a hug.

"Thanks mum," he gave a small wave and then picked up the leash and gave a short whistle and JB came trotting into the room. He danced a bit at the door, then sat obediently, allowing Eggsy to hook his collar. The pug didn't really need the leash, he'd stay at Eggsy's side, but Eggsy knew other people always felt more comfortable with a dog on a leash.

Once out of the house he took the long way to the Kingsman tailor shop. Not that it was too far, even when he took the long way. The Kingsman houses all were within a close radius to the shop. Which also meant they were fairly close to one another. Eggsy tried to convince himself that he took the long way because JB needed the exercise, not because it just happened to go by Harry's house.

Once he got there though, it was hard to lie to himself. The last time he had been there had been when Harry had been killed in Kentucky. A part of him wanted to go inside, to find what remained of Harry's life, to find something, hell, anything that might take the edge off. Another part viewed the house as sacred ground, and didn't want to go stirring up old ghosts. He was haunted enough as it was.

You're a right mess. He thought to himself as he found himself stopped on the sidewalk gazing at the empty house. JB looked up at him with wide eyes, wondering why they had stopped.

It was the familiar chirp of his phone that snapped him out of his thoughts. Roxy's number appeared on the screen.

"Yeah Rox?" he answered.

"We need you to come in. They're finally ready to get on with it!" she sounded excited, and happy in a way he hadn't heard in a long time. A weight he hadn't known was on his shoulders shifted a little. At least now he would have an answer, one way or the other.

"Wear the suit, will you? Merlin had it cleaned from the last time you wore it and James has it at the shop. Do look presentable for this Eggsy," she chided, but he could hear the smile in her tone.

"On my way," he clicked the phone off and looked down at JB. "Gonna get some answers, yeah?" JB's tail wiggled with such force his back-end shook. Eggsy scooped up the dog and took off at a quick pace towards the tailor shop, a lightness to his step that he welcomed, and a small band of anxiety in his stomach that he didn't.

Eggsy sat outside the council room dressed in his best (and only) suit and trying not to impatiently tap his foot on the floor as he waited for the meeting to conclude. Roxy had met him outside before the meeting had started and had given him a quick hug and assured him that she and Merlin would do everything they could to get the council to make him a Kingsman. He had smiled at her and nodded, too nervous to even make a witty reply. Merlin had said nothing, but had nodded in his direction and they both disappeared into the council room.

That had been two hours ago. The knot of anxiety had curled tighter and tighter the longer the meeting dragged on. Thoughts of how he had stopped Valentine and saved the world slowly slipped away and were replaced by how many people had died. How many political figures had their heads explode, and how the nations were in turmoil now that there were so few world leaders left? Valentine had captured a few to keep safe, but not nearly enough to keep the world from falling apart.

He should have done more. Moved faster, hesitated less, remembered the poison-coated knife in his shoe earlier. All of these things could have saved countless lives, and that had to be what they were discussing. He might have saved the world, but that might not have been enough to ensure he became a Kingsman. What a laugh that would be.

Eggsy stood up quickly as he heard movement behind the door. He wiped his suddenly sweaty hands on his trousers, straightened his suit, and hoped he didn't look as nervous as he felt. As he usually did when trying to put on an air of professionalism, his mind returned to Harry. Harry wouldn't lose his cool over a stupid council meeting, so he wouldn't either. The thought calmed him enough that he thought the neutral expression on his face was passable as the door opened.

Merlin looked at him, face as unreadable as ever, and then motioned him to come inside. Eggsy walked into the room, trying to remember to breathe. The room was surprisingly full. Two seats were empty. Harry's seat, and the one next to it. He cast a look at Roxy, but her face was as blank as Merlin's had been. The knot in his stomach cinched tighter.

Arthur's spot was surprisingly filled by a stern looking older woman with short cropped white hair that Eggsy had never seen before. She motioned him forward to her side and he went to her as calmly as he could, suddenly worried that he'd bollocks the whole thing by tripping.

"So you're the young man who managed to stop Valentine from destroying most of the world?" she asked, and he was startled again. She was not British, but American.

"Yes. I am," he replied, keeping his answers as to the point and as sass-less as he could manage.

"Then we all owe you a sincere amount of gratitude. Without you, Lancelot and Merlin, we would have suffered a great many casualties. As it stands, we lost eight Kingsman members of our own division," she paused and he realized that he must have made a face at the number since his own division had lost five.

A small smile quirked at the corner of her mouth and she continued. "Seeing how we have 50 active agents, we suffered far less than we could have if we had not been properly warned." Her eyes flicked towards Merlin, but Eggsy didn't take his eyes off of her face, not wanting to be rude. Fifty agents was a hell of a lot more than the ten they had.

"We've spoken at length about what to do with you Mr. Unwin. It's unprecedented to consider offering membership to someone who murdered their superior, and not just a superior, but the head of the very organization they wish to join."

Eggsy felt his stomach bottom out. He swallowed and remained silent, not able to trust his voice. Not that he had anything to say. She wasn't wrong.

"That being said, if you hadn't used your quick thinking and quicker hand I fear we would all be lost to Valentine's program. Galahad couldn't have picked a better candidate for a Kingsman, and he would be proud of your deeds Mr. Unwin," that small smile crept onto her face again and he felt his cheeks flush red.

"Thank you, um...I apologize, we haven't been introduced," he faltered a little and then held out a hand. She took it in hers, her hand cool and thin, but by no means weak. She shook like she meant business.

"That was my mistake. You may call me Delaware, and I'm the second in command of the North American division of Kingsmen. Our first in command sends his regards, but we have fifty states of chaos to try to reign in and he couldn't leave his post."

"I can understand why," he replied, a sheepish grin spreading across his face. He was the reason they no longer had a President. Roxy shot him a look and the smile faded as quickly as it appeared. Delaware didn't seem to catch it, and if she did, she didn't remark on it.

"I apologize for making you wait so long outside Mr. Unwin, but we have a particularly unique problem to address and have had to make some serious adjustments to how things are done in all of our divisions, and some regulations have had to be...appended to fit the circumstances. Mr. Unwin, how many Kingsmen are in your division?" she asked suddenly and his brows drew close in a slight scowl.

"Normally there are ten that sit at this table...and Merlin makes eleven, but he doesn't vote in any of the important matters," he spoke slowly, wondering where the trick was.

"Right, ten to vote on important matters. The problem we're having Mr. Unwin, is that the old way is no longer working. Arthur's word was gospel in this room, and any vote that was cast, if tied, would be decided by whatever Arthur had chosen. We no longer believe that this is a system that works. Majority rules is our new goal, and we cannot do that with an even number," she met his eyes and stopped.

"So you need eleven people. Which you have if you let Merlin have a vote," he added, this time glancing at Merlin, who looked both amused and irritated.

"Merlin has enough on his plate assisting with missions and training the new recruits, although I'm sure he appreciates your vote of confidence in his abilities," Delaware replied and Eggsy saw relief flood across Merlin's face before his carefully composed mask was back on.

"Then you need to recruit someone else," Eggsy replied, no longer sure what answer she was looking for.

"We were hoping, if you would accept, that the eleventh member would be you Mr. Unwin," she smiled and held out a pair of glasses not unlike the ones he had worn while infiltrating Valentine's base of operations. These were fancier, and had a few more buttons on the side, like Harry's. He felt his tongue stick in his throat and he swallowed carefully before speaking.

"It would be an honor," he replied, thankful his voice remained calm.

"Then Gary Unwin, we welcome you into our ranks as a fellow Kingsman and bestow upon you the newly forged codename of Excalibur," she carefully unfolded the glasses and placed them upon his face.

The weight on his shoulders lifted and he felt like he could finally take a deep breath again. The knot in his stomach uncoiled as the men and women around the room stood up, suddenly clapping. Roxy had a smile a mile wide on her face. Next to her, Percival was nodding in approval. Even Merlin had a smile on his face at the announcement. He tried not to let his eyes linger on Harry's empty chair.

The rest of the ceremony was a blur of oaths, and procedures. It took less than twenty minutes, which surprised him, but the Kingsmen were nothing if not efficient. He was allowed to meet the other temporary members of Delaware's division. Nevada, a very tall man with a neatly manicured beard (unheard of in their division, as it was); Ohio, a small red haired woman that looked like she could give Roxy a run for her money; and Kentucky (that name gave him an unpleasant jolt), a young man with a scar across his cheek. They were filling in until they could recruit their own candidates for the rest of the positions to fill.

Soon after introductions were made and congratulations were sent his direction they concluded for the day and he was finally allowed to relax. Roxy fell in on his left, and Merlin on his right as they left the room.

"I told you, didn't I?" Roxy practically buzzed with excitement. He had seen the same look of triumph on her face whenever she did particularly well on a task.

"You did," he admitted and allowed himself a smile. She threw her arms around his neck and he hugged her back, a small laugh escaping as he lifted her off her feet and gave her a little twirl for effect. Merlin rolled his eyes but Roxy just laughed with him.

Eggsy turned to Merlin as he set Roxy back down. "Just one more thing, yeah? Why did I get a new codename? Why didn't I become the new Galahad?"

He had tried not to let it bother him. Excalibur was a hell of a sight cooler than Galahad, but he had also been expecting to take over the name from his mentor. It only seemed right. Now that he didn't have the same codename, it only seemed appropriate. He could never fill shoes as big as the ones Harry left behind.

"Well, I suppose it's easier to show than explain," Merlin admitted, exchanging a look with Roxy that Eggsy didn't like one bit. Merlin looked down at his iPad and made some quick hand motions, nodded to himself, and then motioned for them to follow his lead.

"What are you on about Merlin?" he asked but Merlin didn't reply. Eggsy glanced at Roxy but her face gave nothing away. He expected nothing else, but it irritated him anyway. Just once he'd like to get a read on these two. Eggsy followed the older Kingsman as he turned down a hallway that Eggsy hadn't been down before. He tried to orient himself but Merlin stopped short at a door before he could figure it out. The scot seemed about to say something, decided on silence, then opened the door and motioned Eggsy to go inside.

The first thing he noticed was the harsh smell of antiseptics that assaulted his nose. The second was that it was obviously a hospital room. The third was that the bed was occupied. The fourth, was that the man in the bed was Harry.

Eggsy's legs gave out and he sank to his knees.