Beavis and Butt-Head in Equestria: Friendship Sucks

By NocturneD

Note: In to celebrate Beavis and Butt-Head's return I figure to do a story, rather funny how both shows have another chance for fun and now running at the same time.

Warning: This story contains crude humor and swearing. So don't say I didn't warn you. I do not own Beavis and Butt-head nor Friend Is Magic.

It was another day in the town of Highland as the sun gently rose over the horizon. A yellow school bus pulled right up to the curb of the Highland museum of unnatural history, the bus doors slid open and out came a rather strange man who seemed to be stuck in a 60's time warp. Long blonde hair, glasses, small beard, purple shirt with a peace sign on it, okay he's a hippie do I have to keep describing him and what he's going to do?

The hippie's name is David Van Driessan, he's a teacher of Highland high school. He turned and called, "Alright students please file in a single line."

One by one the students walked off the bus and onto the walkway towards the museum.

"Hey Beavis, uh heh huh huh." A brunette teen male with a grey shirt with the ACDC logo on it and red shorts stepped off the bus and waited for his companion.

"What? Heh heh heh." The blonde male around the same age wearing a blue t-shirt with the Metallica logo and grey shorts.

"Heh huh huh... you had morning wood while you were sleeping on the bus." The brunette laughed.

"Oh yeah... heh heh heh heh heh." Beavis laughed as usual, then looked down, then back up at the museum. "So um... Why are we here again Butt-head? Heh heh heh."

"Because dumb ass!" Butt-head explained, "It's a field trip uh huh huh."

"Oh yeah..." Beavis frowned, "It's not to the nursing home again is it?"

"No... uh huh huh..." Butt-head chuckled, "We got kicked out because you ate all those caffeine pills and ran around scaring old people uh huh huh huh heh huh."

Within a few short minutes Beavis and Butt-head joined their class on the tour around the museum. They observed many strange forms of art from Indian masks to obscure sculptures, their tour guide explained their origin and price as they would be sought after by rich collectors. Some sculptures were stranger than the last. The tour guide stopped the class in front a wide open doorway leading to a circular room, "Here class of Highland is one of our most rare pieces... The Alicorn." The tour guide lead the class into the room, slowly the students were looking at from all angles. The alicorn statue was merely fifteen foot standing a stone pedestal itself standing in a triumph stance with its wings spread out and horn gleaming in the sunlight.

"It's so pretty." A female student said.

"Marvelous." Another female student added.

"I always loved horses." A third female replied.

"Uh huh huh huh... that horse got a stiffy on it's head." Butt-head chuckled.

Beavis raised his arms and bit and widened his eyes, "Booooooooooiiiiiinnnnnngggggg."

The tour guide continued the explanation, "There is mystery behind this statue students. There was no record of an artist ever making this because simply it was found one day during an excavation when the city wanted to build a new office building down town. It was such a marvelous piece to go to waste despite it having a lot of stains and decay as it was estimated maybe over five hundred or so years old. They also found a text by the the pedestal." The tour guide walked over to the pedestal, "Written in a strange language we had many scholars look at it but couldn't translate the whole thing, only thing they could make out is... Don't anger the alicorn."

Mr. Van Driessan got shivers just looking at the thing, "Though it's a wonderful piece, it sort of sends chills down your spine doesn't it?"

The tour guide turned to Van Driessan, "Oh yes... there are stories behind this statue as one said that once whoever found this feel ill after a couple of days after finding it. Another... the curator here died of heart failure after acquiring this statue. Could say... it's cursed."

"Cool eh heh heh eh heh." Beavis shouted then chuckled again.

The tour guide then directed everyones attention elsewhere to another exhibit, soon the room was empty except for... Beavis and Butt-head continued to look at the stone alicorn. A dark aura could certainly be felt, but to these two they praised darkness. The two teens looked at each other, then back at the alicorn, then back to each other.

"Hey Beavis." Butt-head chuckled, "Go up there and touch it's schlong."

Beavis frowned, "NO WAY!" He chuckled, "You do it."

"Don't be a wuss Beavis." Butt-head assured his friend.

"Uh... okay." Beavis then chuckled again, he climbed over the safety rope then started to climb up the stone statue slowly. "Why is it's thing on it's head?"

"Because dumb ass..." Butt-head chuckled, "It probably wants to impress allll..iicorn chicks and probably doesn't want to lift it's leg uh huh huh huh."

"Oh yeah..." Beavis chuckled then nodded. He already was on the alicorn's back. "Just a bit further... heh heh heh." Beavis stepped on one of the wings to get a better balance. Finally he threw out his arm and an open palm around the alicorn's horn. Suddenly his foot slipped now he was hanging by the horn; face to face with the alicorn statue.

"Uh huh huh you're touching it." Butt-head looked up at the blonde and laughed.

"SHUT UP!" Beavis was trying to pull himself up but his legs wiggled wildly, "HELP ME ASSWIPE!"

"Uh... okay." Butt-head replied not taking his friend in distress seriously. The teen scratched his head then looked at the situation. Wasn't that far down, Butt-head looked at Beavis then at a nearby painting, then back to Beavis. A light bulb dimly lit up above his head then burned out. Butt-head walked over to the painting and ripped off from the wall the flung at Beavis which caused the blonde to grip harder and shout in pain.

"OW!" Beavis shouted, "BUTTMUNCH!"

Suddenly... Beavis heard a loud crack. He looked at the horn that started to wedge and the finally snapped loose. Butt-head watched his friend fall, smacked down hard on the marble floor with the horn still in his hand.

"Huh huh you broke it's thing off." Butt-head laughed.

"OW... eh heh heh." Beavis rubbed his spine and slowly got up with the horn still in his hand.

"Dude... huh huh huh..." Butt-head looked at the horn, "You're holding it."

Beavis used the horn to scratch his butt, "Makes a nice butt scratcher though... heh heh heh."

A growl could be heard...

"Did you fart?" Butt-head asked his friend what the sound was.

The growl grew louder... The horn in the blonde's hand glowed with a weird aura, the two took noticed and were in awe.

"Hey Beavis." Butt-head looked at Beavis, "You should try shoving that thing up the horse's butt."

"Heh heh heh. YEAH!" Beavis shouted as he ran to the back of the statue to look at the alicorn's flank end, he frowned, "Where's the bunghole on this thing?"

Butt-head followed, "Uh. You mean there isn't one?"

The two looked at the statue dumb founded, well ofcourse they're dumb to begin with if you haven't figured that out.

"Huh huh huh. You should just make one." Butt-head added.

The horn on the other hand had other plans, the aura glowed in a mystical blue color that soon engulfed the two teens then suddenly vanished...

What would seem like hours would have gone by... The two teens were laying out in the middle of a field of some sort...

"Ugh..." Beavis rubbed his forehead, "Did we like party or something?"

Butt-head was face down on the ground, he stirred and opened his eyes, "Uh... huh I guess so." He lifted himself up and took one look around to find the place they were in was not the museum they were in earlier. "UH... wait a minute..."

Beavis stood up as well and noticed the place was a lot more... colorful... He frowned, "Did we get kidnapped again?"

"Uh... hmmm..." Butt-head tried to piece this together but since he wasn't very smart at all he couldn't add it up.

The two again gave a good look around still remaining in the same position to find it was an enchanting place they were in and not like where they were from. Singing birds. The sun shining brightly. No smog. No vandalism. No maxi-mart. Grass was a fresh green. If they couldn't be anymore confused they could of sworn they heard talking from nearby. Butt-head waved his friend to follow him, the two ofcourse continued to laugh.

Butt-head stopped at a bush to overlook a nearby town. Beavis stood next to him and also watched. For some reason they were watching what appeared to be miniature multi-colored horses dancing around, singing, and enjoying their time. They lived in a nice and harmonious society, one would dream to have a nice place like this back in our own world. The horses talked to each other and did various things, laughed, played, shopped. The two looked at each other in disgust.

"Hey Beavis..." Butt-head turned to his friend.

"What?" Beavis chuckled, "Eh heh heh heh."

"This sucks..." Butt-head laughed, "Uh huh huh huh."

to be continued?

Note: Yeah this was a rainy day story I wanted to get out of my shelved files. If you don't know who Beavis and Butt-Head is then you must of been living underneath a rock your whole life. Or haven't been born yet. This show pretty much represented a generation, a funny one that is. I watched the first episode and was practically rolling on the floor. Second episode, was even better, and so on. Also another reason why I wrote this because of the constant load of human stories turning out, I'm not sick of them it's just there's so many of them and that's what in the section is mostly what I can say is the only way your story is going to get noticed. That or be on Equestria Daily. There's a few good ones out there like The Newcomer by Ponylover74, this is a really good one. Isomnia by RedOktober, this one really worked its way up to my top favorite. Other stories are good too. But some of the ones coming in I think are the only way to get noticed and some aren't as good, they're practically the same thing over and over again. Well I'm done with my bitching.