"What I thought wasn't mine
In the light
Was a one of a kind,
A precious pearl"

I sat alone, Edward had left months ago leaving me alone but making me promise not to do anything stupid or reckless. Oh god I loved him so much.

"When I wanted to cry
I couldn't cause I
Wasn't allowed"

Charlie is annoyed with my crying, he doesn't even ask me what wrong anymore. He even tell me to shut up sometimes. Well if he loved Renee like I love Edward he'd feel like this too. He doesn't understandit hurts so much to be so all alone. To know you everything slipped away and doesn't care about you.

"Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now"

Im sorry...that's what it means..Gomenasai..its Japanese for I'm sorry. I am sorry, I'm sorry to my heart for loving, my mind for wondering, my soul for searching. Why did he leave me? I would done anything for him. I would have killed myself for him, or someone else if he wanted me to. Why did he leave me?

"What I thought wasn't all
So innocent
Was a delicate doll
Of porcelain"

Edward's skin was so cold and white like porcelain, he didn't break as easily though. Hell he really didn't break at all. Not like me, plain human Bella I break easily. I'm broken now I don't even know if I can be fixed. Porcelain is hard to fix, especially porcelain dolls.

"When I wanted to call you
And ask you for help
I stopped myself"

I knew he didn't care so I didn't bother. He wasn't there for me to call anyway. He wouldn't have helped me because he doesn't love me. He could have saved me...
"Gomenasai for everything
Gomenasai, I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now"

I really need a friend...I need more than a friend, I need Edward. I've been all alone since he left. Jacob got annoyed with my being depressed and we haven't talked in the longest time. Well not as long as Edward been gone though..

"What I thought was a dream
A mirage
Was as real as it seemed
A privilege"

I thought I was crazy at first. That it was impossible for vampires to exist. I said they were only mythical creatures. I thought I had made Edward and all the Cullen's up to. Like imaginary friends or something but I know they're real. I hope they know I love them

"When I wanted to tell you
I made a mistake
I walked away"

I broke my promise to Edward so many times. This time though...

"Gomenasai, for everything
Gomenasai, Gomenasai, Gomenasai
I never needed a friend,
Like I do now"

I love you Edward

"Gomenasai, I let you down
Gomenasai, Gomenasai,
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now"

My thought begin to fade away as my body sinks lower. All those pills I took I making me hazy. I smile as water fills my longs and the world around my wobbles. My eyes clothes and I think about my promise. I guess I never was good at keeping promises. This one is no different. I feel my life slowly leaving my body as breathing becomes painful. My mind craves air as do my lung but I don't feel like reacting. I don't feel like living anymore. I clothes my eyes one last time and I feel everything slip...

Katherine

This is kind of morbid but tell me if I should continue or leave it as a one-shot song fic