Of Cartoons and Ringtones.
Hi all, a little drabble piece for your amusement.
It started in my head as a small funny prank fiction and sort of exploded on paper. I'm not entirely sure that it still works to be honest but I'll leave that decision to you guys. Let me know how I did in the reviews
It's been a while since I've had a chance to write fan-fiction, although the ideas keep on coming so hopefully this is the start of many.
Ok I don't own the characters, and apart from possibly a little bit of swearing later on this story is pretty innocent.
Oh and according to the internet it is not possible to change ringtones remotely, just in case anyone wanted to pranks their friends.
Why did his phone always ring when Grissom was talking to him?
Why, when it insisted on ringing, could he never remember which pocket he'd tucked into last?
When had his ringtone changed to Alvin and the Chipmunks?
As he was once again forced to perform a one man pat-down under the penetrating glare of his boss, Greg Sanders felt the heat rising into his face as the familiar strains of the cartoons theme tune sang out loudly 'Watch out coz here we come, it's been a while but we're back with style….' around him the other CSI's Sara, Nick, Warrick and Catherine were trying not to laugh but he was still highly aware of their barely concealed sniggers.
At last the offending gadget was located and the call terminated, he had to remember to change his ring tone back to snakes eyes and sissies at the earliest convenience.
"As I was saying" Grissom cleared his throat, possibly to prevent his own giggling fit, or maybe as a means to silence the rest of the night shift who now sat with tears of laughter shining in their eyes following their recent outburst "Greg you will be working with Nick tonight, 419 out in Summerland. Sara you get a B&E just off the strip, Warrick and Catherine, I need you to help me review the evidence for abduction of Amy Collins last week, the DA wants to throw everything we've got at the suspects"
The team nodded and slowly made to leave, heading for their respective assignments until only Greg and Nick remained in the break room.
"So …." Nick started glancing in the direction of his red faced colleague "How long have you been a chipmunks fan"
Greg groaned and rubbed his face, trying to dissipate the heat and redness "Man I don't even remember where that came from" he looked momentarily confused "Seriously, you don't think I got hacked do you?" he asked.
The pair wandered towards the parking lot with their kits and clambered into Greg's Denali, setting off for Summerland, where the money flowed and arguments often ended in a case for law enforcement.
"Is that even possible? I mean changing someone's ring tone remotely?" the Texan asked, was his friend saying that he hadn't been responsible for what happened this morning?
"I don't know. Seems unlikely" Greg shrugged back, he wasn't that tech savvy but surely you needed to have someone's phone in your hand to change the ringtone and he never let his out of his sight.
"Are you sure you weren't just drunk and decided to change it yourself?" Nick knew Greg too well, there had been occasions, mostly after a big case had been solved or after passing his final proficiency that Greg had enjoyed Vegas a little too much and had woken up the next day with a thumping headache, a strong attraction to the toilet bowl and no memory of the last 12 hours, it was always fun to let him in on what had occurred in those lost hours…. trying to seduce a palm tree had been Nick's favourite.
"No! It was definitely not chipmunks last night during shift and if I'd got that drunk in the meantime do you really think I'd been in a fit state to work?"
That was a good point "So if you didn't change it, who did?" the older man asked as they pulled up to the crime scene.
Greg just shrugged and grabbed his kit ready to start processing; he would worry about odd ringtones later; right now the crime scene took priority.
reg just shrugged and grabbed his kit ready to start processing.
e ringtone and he never let his out of his sight a CSI that Gr_
Grissom leaned back in his office chair and pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers, even in print the case he was reviewing was a nasty one.
Amy Collins was or at least had been 16 years old, caught in a bitter battle between her divorcing parents. The police had been called after she had been missing from her home for 48 hours, her mother believing that she had escaped to a girlfriends' house for some peace had failed to check her whereabouts and her father had been too busy digging up the dirt on his ex to care about the location of his little girl. The main sticking point in the separation had been the custody of Amy and yet neither party had cared where she was until it was too late.
The search had lasted a week, police and forensics officers pulling double and triple shifts to find the missing teenager, she had been found, eventually, in a warehouse off of industrial, tied and gagged, the sight of her lifeless body hanging from the observation deck dripping with maggots had turned several stomachs that day.
What made it worse was that she hadn't been murdered, a man hired by her father had collected her from school and taken her to the warehouse for 'a few days' she'd been fed, watered, given books to read, everything to make her stay comfortable, apart from freedom of course. The plan had been that she would be 'kidnapped' by the man at a time only he knew and taken to a place that only he had access to, that way the father had a perfect alibi and could call off his hired goon when his wife had suffered enough, making himself look like a hero and winning him points with the judge.
The problem was that the warehouse was derelict, had been condemned, the observation deck was unsafe, and one evening after her captor had left, the metal supports had buckled and Amy had fallen until the rope had snapped taught, breaking her ribs and puncturing her lungs. She had suffocated slowly and painfully, struggling to inflate useless lungs and had then been left for the bugs because 'the father had not given the signal for her location to be revealed'
Grissom looked back down at the report, checking the entomology results, there was no doubt how or where she died, or at whose hands but the court case was difficult. Technically it was an accident but his results showed that she had been dead for 3 days, that meant someone had had the opportunity to save her, or at least cut her down and end the wasted search and they hadn't, the DA would throw everything he could at the father and his accomplice, this case would be one studied by law students for years to come.
A strange noise filtered through the scientists' reverie 'Spiderman, Spiderman' he looked for the source of the tune, it was his cell phone but that wasn't his ringtone. He snatched the phone from his desk and answered gruffly "Not funny Greg. See me when you get back"
At the Summerland crime scene Greg pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at it like it was an alien object, he hadn't even had chance to speak before being told to see Grissom in his office and have the call terminated.
"Everything ok?" Nick asked seeing his friends' confused expression.
"I rang Grissom to say there was some entomological evidence here and ask for advice on its collection and he bit my head off, told me to see him when I got back and hung-up before I could even say hello".
"Hmmm maybe he was being chewed out by Ecklie. Send him a message about the bugs" Nick knew Grissom was reviewing a tough case, hell he and Greg had been part of the search team but it took a lot to make the nightshift supervisor take a bite out a member of his team.
In a small domestic area about a mile from the famous Las Vegas strip Sara Sidle squatted down surveying the scene, she had made copious notes, taken photos and sketched the crime scene in detail.
The case seemed straight forward, although strange. The perp. had entered the house through the back door, breaking the glass and leaving a nice trail of mud throughout the lower level. She had already bagged a sample for trace.
The house itself was sparsely decorated, a few family pictures hung on the walls leading from the small kitchenette into a cosy den with a deep pile rug. A couple of chairs, a sofa and a 30 inch TV, the only furniture.
The office was white washed with hard wood floors, a leather office chair sat in front of a wide curving desk, home to a mid-range computer and printer. Certificates on the wall announced that a Brian Shellac had graduated from the local university with a degree in geology and a masters in volcanology.
The owner was single and currently abroad performing research; he wouldn't know anything about the break-in until he next checked his phone.
The case was puzzling though, someone had taken the trouble to break-in but nothing appeared to be missing, at least nothing obvious. The TV, computer, printer, a few ancient looking ornaments were all in place with a fine layer of undisturbed dust to prove that they hadn't been moved.
The muddy trace showed that the intruder had covered every inch of the ground floor and yet no drawers were pulled out; no cushions disturbed or torn, nothing seemed out of place. That could only mean one of two things that the 'burglar' knew what he was after, and knew what it was kept in but not where it was or that the break-in had been for another reason. A homeless person sheltering perhaps…
The evidence would tell the story, she would have to wait until the lab techs had done their thing, then hopefully a suspect would be brought in and she could find out what the hell was going on.
She dug her cell out to call in and get her next assignment but was surprised when the screen lit up and she was greeted with some unfamiliar lyrics 'I am Adora, He-man's twin sister and defender of the crystal castle….' she quickly answered "Gil… yeah all done here…hey my phone just made a funny noise when you called? Something about a crystal castle... you too... What is going on?... Oh I wouldn't want to be in his shoes… yeah I'm coming back in now… kay bye" the brunette hung up and smiled, pranking Grissom may have been going a little far but she could appreciate Greg's ingenuity with the ringtones, she would have to have a word with him about hers though, really She-Ra?
Catherine and Warrick had settled themselves in the evidence room to go through the case notes for the Amy Collins kidnapping, it was really just a case of crossing the T's and dotting the I's but still both wanted to do a good job. The father should be made an example of, arranging a kidnapping just to punish your ex! He deserved to rot, just as he had let his daughter rot.
Warrick smiled and allowed a quiet laugh to escape his lips.
"What's funny?" Catherine looked up from her notes, her brows knitted in confusion.
"Oh nothing… I was just thinking of the look on Greg's face when his cell went off this morning. Man that was so funny!" Warrick grinned again.
"Oh yeah, well he set it, he had to know that would happen right" she queried
"I suppose. Man I knew he was a goofy kid but seriously setting your ringtone to a cartoon theme….?"
"Yeah I know right… and from what I hear he's been changing other peoples ringtones all night too" she grinned, loving the fact that she had some gossip to share
"Really?" Warrick's interest was piqued
"Yeah. Sara got She-Ra and Grissom got Spiderman. Grissom is seriously pissed off with him"
Warrick laughed out loud "Oh man, he clearly put some thought into this, those themes are almost tailored, I'm tempted to shake him by the hand …." the black man's grin suddenly fell as his own cell started ringing 'do-do-do-do-do….Inspector gadget' "Why that little …."
"Now Warrick, I thought you were impressed with his little prank" Catherine grinned, returning her attention to the case file as her companion answered the call.
"Man that's not cool" Nick gave his partner a stern look as they walked into the precinct
"Nick… It wasn't me, I keep telling you that" the younger man protested, all evening he'd been hearing rumours of people's ringtones mysteriously changing into cartoon themes and that it was down to him.
"Come on Bravestar?" Nick continued his rant "Why Bravestar? Greg"
"I don't know man! Maybe coz it was set in Texas?" the blonde shrugged
"Oh did your homework then, choose each theme especially for each person?"
"No! It wasn't me! I know it sounds like something I'd do and yes I do like cartoons and yes I know that Bravestar is set in Texas because I used to watch it as a kid but I am not the one doing this. Nick come on, I was processing, with you, all evening"
"GREG!" Grissom shouted from his office as the two CSI's walked past, the young CSI flinched at the sound "In here now!"
Greg swallowed and entered the small office with it many jars and specimens "You wanted to see me" he coughed, feeling his old nerves come back as the supervisor fixed him with a stern grin.
"The cell phone hacking. It needs to stop" the bearded man stated, removing his glasses and looking at the youngest member of his team.
"I agree, but I'm not the one doing it… take my phone…. get Archie to I dunno check recent messages or something… I promise I have been processing the 419 all evening…."
Their conversation was interrupted by Brass entering quickly "Hey Gil, I like a joke but my suspect is now laughing at me instead of answering questions. I thought you were sorting this out" he looked over at Sanders sitting nervously opposite the desk "This the culprit?" he asked.
"As yet unproved" Grissom glanced between the two men just as Brass' phone rang again "Jimbo…Jimbo….Jimbo" the former DNA tech hadn't moved in the last 10 minutes and his phone was still lying on the desk untouched. Unless the young man had somehow planned this all in advance and set a time delay on the ringtone changes…. it was unlikely. Perhaps he was putting the interpretation before the evidence on this occasion. "Alright Greg, get back to work" Greg practically jumped out of his seat and made for the door, happy to have been given a reprieve even if not found completely innocent. "Greg…" the older man called, the youth stopped and looked back "You might need this" he held out the cell phone.
Two ringtone changes remained on the crib sheet and the night shift was almost over.
It was a shame that Greg had almost got into trouble for the prank, but he'd make it up to him later, buy him a drink or two.
He'd understand. They'd all understand ….
"How's the 419 going?" Catherine asked, walking into the lab where Nick was discussing the fingerprint results with Greg.
"Good thanks Cath. Hey did you get ringtone raped yet?" Nick asked slyly
"Ringtone raped?" the older woman raised her eyebrows at the phrasing then quickly smiled, it was an apt description "No not yet" she glanced at Greg, who had the sense to look worried "You?"
"Yeah, Bravestar. You remember that one?" the Texan chuckled slightly, earlier he'd been angry, now it just seemed ridiculous.
"Doesn't ring any bells, speaking of which"… the first notes of a ringtone started on the strawberry blondes phone 'It's not much of a life if you're just a pretty face…. just to be whoever you are is not disgrace…' she stared at the dial and then back at Greg with a raised eyebrow, still not convinced that he was not the guilty party "Willows…" she answered leaving the room to concentrate on the call.
"Which cartoon was that?" Nick asked, he didn't know that theme
"Raggy Dolls. It's a British cartoon about a bunch or reject toys that go on adventures. What?" Greg looked at his buddies amused expression with confusion
"You really do like cartoons don't you?" The older man asked, smiling.
"Well yeah, they help me relax after work, cheer me up when I'm down, occupy my mind when I'm sick…." Greg wasn't sure he was making any sense, how do you explain to someone like Nick that 10 minutes of colourful characters bashing each other over the head is as healing as 30 mins of 'therapy', that after his accident in the lab, watching cartoons had been the only thing that had made him start laughing again, that had allowed him to forget about the scars and the nerves and the temporary ringing in his ears.
"Yeah? Well maybe I should try it sometime" the Texan grinned, everyone had their methods for surviving life, judging by his partners outlook on life, the cartoons were a good way to go.
A moment of companionable silence passed, a silent understanding, before a quiet cough and a return to the task at hand.
One change to go, and then all would be revealed. He wondered if anyone had even considered the obvious reason for the pranks. Perhaps not.
At least no-one had been seriously disciplined, he was surprised that no-one had figured out it was him; they were still focused on poor old Greg, despite his protests…
He tapped a few keys, calling up the last theme tune, this one he might never have thought of if it were not for an overheard conversation between Wendy and David in the break room.
As fun as it was to prank the CSI's and the police captain, this would be the crème de la crème, getting one over on the snotty trace tech was worth every minute of effort.
"You beeped" Greg wandered into the small trace lab where David Hodges was sat, looking smug and making notes.
"Sanders" he had never felt comfortable using the young man's Christian name, even when they had both been lab techs. "I hear you've been having a jolly evening"
"If you call pulling carnivorous beetles out of someone's eye socket jolly, I suppose I have" the bottle blonde replied gently, just enough detail to make the technician flinch. It was a game of one-upmanship that they had played for years.
"Whatever floats your boat? I was meaning the ringtones. Who's next huh?"
"I wouldn't know, I'm not the one behind it!" Greg kept his tone light, Hodges was no threat, he wasn't about to fire him for a little joke.
"Really, it seems like something you'd do!" the scientist seemed genuinely surprised
"Perhaps, but then why would I embarrass myself with Alvin and the Chipmunks? Looks like you didn't escape the phantom phone hacker yourself" with that he turned and took the report back to the evidence room, grinning as Hodges looked at his phone like it was an offending object, listening to the music emanating from its tiny speakers incredulously 'Doyle was a high school star, everybody thought he'd go real far, but he didn't get the things, from the classes he took, you know he just wasn't interested, in his books. Aimee was the smartest girl at school, not very popular, not very cool; two kids will be chosen from Earth, to go to school at Galaxy High. Travelling millions of miles through space, to go to school in a far off place. Aimee is the sweetheart; Doyle's got a lot to learn, here at Galaxy High! Galaxy High! Galaxy High! Galaxy High!
The shift was over, everyone was gathered in the break room winding down before heading home to bed.
"Hey did we ever find out who was responsible for the ringtones?" Sara asked aloud.
"No. It just didn't seem that important in the run of things, it had to be an inside job after all. Hijinks." Nick answered, glancing sideways at Greg, who quickly narrowed his eyes, a silent protest at his continued blame.
"How'd you figure that?" Catherine asked
"Well presumably the hack was done using text messaging so the perp would have to know our numbers." reasoned the Texan
"So the entire department, all shifts, and most of the police enforcement staff then" Warrick offered.
"Well yeah but each ringtone was personalised too, chipmunks for Greg because he likes fun and rock music, Bravestar for me because of Texas, Jimbo for Jim presumably a corruption of his name…." Nick tried again. He was reasonably sure that the youngest member of their team was telling the truth and that he was innocent. He might have had a rep for eccentricity but practical jokes …. no it wasn't him.
At that moment 8 cell phones beeped alerting their owners to a text message being received
"APRIL FOOLS" Greg read out from his screen sounding confused
Everyone else found they had the same message and the same sender
"Archie did this? Archie was the one changing ringtones?" Catherine gasped, realisation dawning
"Oh man it's obvious when you think of it, who would have access to all our numbers, know enough about us to personalise the rings and have the technology not to mention the know-how to set up a prank like that" Sara sat up straight, not entirely sure whether to be annoyed or amused.
"Archie's responsible for me getting chewed out?" Greg also sat up "Just wait till I find him, I'll put all his star trek DVD's in the wrong boxes and swap all his cables around.
Everyone burst out laughing at this point, even Greg, after all no real harm had been done and it had provided a talking point.
"So… er… back to mine for breakfast and Tom and Jerry?" Greg spoke again
The others all exchanged glances "Yeah I could go for some of that" Nick stated grinning.
The others all nodded too, it sounded like fun.