A/N: Alright, so I decided to finally write a sequel for one of my stories. I decided to continue right where we left off in "A Fresh Start" so if you didnt read that one, you might be a little lost. We all know that things couldn't fall perfectly into place, so here's the journey back to one another and trying to find that comfort that use to be there before everything happened to endanger their future togther. Enjoy...

As always I dont own Twilight, that is Stephanie Meyers...

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Chapter 1

Do I really want this? Am I really ready to get married? Should I have said no, I mean he is the love of my life and the only person I could ever imagine marrying. But on the other hand, I haven't seen or spoken to Edward in years and here I am thinking of marriage? There has to be something wrong with me. Bella said to herself as she continued to drive to the Cullen's house. She stole a glance at Edward and watched how calm and collected he was, and it bothered her. There she was, going insane with thoughts, and he was acting as if there wasn't anything wrong with them. She was so lost in thought, that she didn't realize she had pulled into the drive way.

"Love, we're here." Edward said and kissed the back of her hand. He looked as she didn't even turn off the car or make any more to get out. "Sweetheart, are you ok?"

"Ya, sorry." Bella said and turned the car off as she stepped out.

"You really do zone out when you're driving, its rather cute." He said and kissed her before turning to the trunk to get her bags.

"Well, I did have a lot to consider," she said and they made their way to the house.

"I know and I know that we have some things to work through." He started and she cut him off.

"Edward, I know you would never intentionally hurt me, and I know you believed in leaving, but --" she stopped and took a deep breath. "You do realize we are in the same place we were then. You are still a vampire, and I am still a human. You and your family are still the same through to me that you were then."

"I know that," he said and turned away. He wasn't sure how to finish that statement, of how to talk about what she said. She was right and that was something that he didn't think about until she brought it up. He was to obsessed with the thought of finding her again that he didn't consider the consequences of them being together again. The entire ride from her dorm, he was thinking about how it felt to be near her again, to be with her and forgot all the problems that came with the reunion. He knew she wanted an eternity with him, he knew that she would never settle for anything less, and there he was guessing if that was what he should give her. He shook off his thoughts and looked at her, seeing a shiver run through her body and pulled her into his embrace. "Lets get you inside, and we'll finish this later when we're alone." He said and she nodded.

The moment Bella walked into the room and seen her second family she smiled, but before she could say a word, Alice launched herself at Bella and wrapped her arms around her.

"I missed you, and there's so much to discuss. Not to mention a make-over, you hair was better brown…" Alice rambled on until Carlisle stepped in.

"Breathe," he said and Alice looked at him weird and he laughed. "I meant Bella, you assaulted the poor girl before she could even say hello."

"Thank you," Bella said as she stepped to hug him.

"Anytime, seems you forgot how excited Alice can get." He joked and she laughed as she seen Esme come into the room.

"Thank you for letting me stay for the holidays." she said and Esme pulled her into a hug.

"We wouldn't have it any other way, you belong here." She said and Bella nodded.

"I've missed you," she said and Esme pulled away to look at her.

"We missed you too." That's when Bella noticed it, Jasper was no where to be found.

"Where is Jasper?" She asked and Alice looked down at her feet.

"He's upstairs," she said quietly and Bella made her way over. "He still feels guilty over what happened, at your party."

"What are you doing?" Edward asked as he stopped her.

"This is his home, if he's uncomfortable that I'm here then I'll leave." She said and turned to look at Edward before she continued up the stairs. "Don't even think about it." She said and went up, as Edward backed away. She headed towards the slightly open door and knew it had to be Jasper and Alice's room. She knocked on the door as she pulled it open a little more. "Jasper…"

"Bella don't come in here…" he said but she didn't listen.

"Too bad door was open." She said and leaned on the door frame and he stood by the open window. "Please hear me out." she said and he nodded. "I know it was an accident and I know you would never intentionally hurt me or anyone. It's not who you are…"

"But I did hurt you and everyone. If I wouldn't have lost control none of this would have happened, everyone wouldn't have been miserable since we left Forks."

"It was an accident, and no one blames you."

"Its my fault, I attacked you, I could have killed you!"

"But you didn't…"

"But I made everyone abandon you."

"No, that is Edward's fault and his alone. He made the choice to leave me, and you all followed like a responsible family should. But you never made them leave, Edward was looking for a reason to leave for weeks, he was pulling away from me long before my party. You just gave him an excuse."

"Bella please feel something else…" Jasper said, wanting her to feel angry or uncomfortable but neither were there.

"I don't feel anything hurtful because its waster energy. I learned not to waste time because you never know when it can run out. If you want me to say I forgive you fine -- I forgive you. But there really isn't anything to forgive." She said and turned towards the door. "You don't have to hide here, I'll leave and when you're ready to be around me I'll come back." She said and headed down the stairs, meeting Edward at the bottom.

"You are not going to that dorm and being alone." He said and she shook her head.

"I won't be here and make him uncomfortable or feel like he has to hide. That's not fair, you told me home was the one place where none of you had to hide who and what you are. How can you ask me to take that away from him?" She said and looked at Alice. "We can go out, and go from there until Jasper is ready to be around me again." She said and headed towards the door as Edward tried to change her mind.

"You use to be easier to dazzle." He joked and she shook her head.

"I'm a lot stronger then, I'm not as naïve." She said and watched the sad expression on his face. "We'll talk about that later, come on and take me home." She said and looked for her bags, but they were gone. "Edward…"

"Don't look at me." He said and Esme stepped forward.

"I had Carlisle take them to your room before he left." She said and went over to Bella. "Please don't leave, Jasper will come around. I don't think he was expecting to see you so soon, and it drudged up a lot of guilt."

"He's not there yet and I think you're right. No one seen the last few days coming and now, it's a lot to handle for any of us. I'll get my bag later." She opened the door as Edward stood next to her, knowing he's never change her mind.

"Bella wait…" she heard and smiled.

"Took you long enough, for a minute I thought I was going to have to get all the way to the car to stop me." She said and looked at Jasper at the bottom of the steps and everyone looking around confused. "I knew you'd never let me leave, even if you did feel this needless guilt." She said and Jasper smirked.

"You belong here." He said and before he realized it, she ran up and hugged him.

"How about we start over and forget it ever happened."

"I'll try," he said and Edward pulled her back into his embrace.

"Sorry but you have your own love." He said and Bella turned to look at him.

"And you have trust issues to work out with yours." She said and started to pull him towards the stairs. "I think its time to finish that talk." He led her up to his room and she smiled when she seen how close it was to his room in Forks. "Still no bed." She joked and he came around to look her in the eye.

"I still have no use for one. But there is one in your room." He said and Bella just nodded, she knew what he was trying to say -- no one took her place.

"So you lied," she said and sat down on the couch. He leaned against the wall and stared at his feet, still unsure what to say.

"It was the only way you'd let me go." He said and she shook her head.

"Let you? I tried to find you, follow the path you took when you left through the woods. But all I did was fall and pass out. Even after that, after laying unconscious for hours I wanted you. I waited for you to come back, staring out my window, looking around school for you to just show up. I even went to your house and sat on the steps for hours. But there was nothing and then I just gave up." She said and started to pace around the room as she let her anger take over. "It wasn't enough that I lost you, but I lost Alice too. She was my best friend and I didn't even get to say goodbye. No, you made sure of that."

"Bella…" he started but she shook her head.

"No let me finish." She said and he nodded. "You broke me that day and I still cant put all the pieces back together, but I tried, tried to find a sense of normalcy in the mess you left behind. To have a resemblance of a real life again -- one without you. I changed everything about me, all that I was and became stronger, tougher. I couldn't rely on you anymore and I leaned to rely on myself." She said and he stopped her, grabbing her hands in his. "For that I'm glad, I needed to learn to rely on myself and not on anyone else because who knows if they are going to be there tomorrow."

"I…" he started and stopped. "I was wrong to leave. And you're right about what you said to Jasper. I was looking for an excuse. I love you more then anyone or anything in the world. And to know the constant danger you were in because of me -- was killing me. But I couldn't leave, I couldn't walk away from you no matter how much I knew I should. And then Jasper…"

"It was an accident, he would never hurt me."

"I know that, God everyone tried to convince me of that, but it made everything with James so fresh. Then Alice and her visions I couldn't let that happen. So I changed your future."

"What did Alice see?"

"It doesn't matter…" he said and turned away.

"No! Tell me, if you want this to work then you need to be honest with me." She said and he looked out the window, not meeting her eyes. "Fine, if you don't want to be honest and deal with this fine." She said and stormed out of the room and ran right into Alice.

"Why don't we catch up, it seems like you could use the girl talk."

"Ya, sure." Bella said and followed her down the hallway. She needed to clear her head and calm down before she went back at it with Edward, she was determined to get him to be honest with her.