The Only Man you can Hate is Yourself, Raven
Raven closed his eyes and inhaled the fresh scent of the morning. Though Bern was freezing, the air was so clear, like nothing had ever touched it before. It took Raven's troubles off his mind. He smiled as he looked at the landscape.
But there was a pang somewhere deep inside when he looked over the snowy cliff. Something that he could not get over, no matter how hard he tried. His home. He remembered when he was a young boy, his father would take him out to the field surrounding the estate.
One day, his father took him out to the field and told him to sit down. The wind had been softly blowing the grass, and the grass was dancing to the song the birds had been singing. Raven's father looked up around him, and smiled. Then he sat down in front of Raven.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" his father commented, picking a flower out from the grass and watched it flow away gracefully in the wind's cradle.
"Yes father, I love this place!" Little Raven had said as he inspected a ladybug crawling up and down his hand. He could feel his father's smile grow broader. Then he looked up to his father and asked, "Is it going to be here forever?"
"I don't know." his father admitted, "It will probably be gone one day...but, Raven, you must enjoy things while they are here, not worry about what will happen to them. Will you be upset when this field is gone?"
"Yes." Raven watched as the ladybug flew elsewhere, "I will hate whoever takes it away from me."
"Raymond," Raven looked up at his father when he heard his tone grow more serious, "Hate? How could you hate them? You will be upset with them, but the only man you can hate is yourself. It is yourself that won't let you forgive them. That is the man to hate."
Raven didn't know how to respond, so his father had brought him back, where Raven's mother and Priscilla had been sewing. The next three years of Raven's life had been peaceful. Raven and Priscilla didn't know any other way to live.
And then the Marquess of Ostia decided he wished to have their land. He sent dozens, hundreds, of soldiers to take over. As his own father and mother, and all their foot soldiers were overwhelmed and killed, Raven and Priscilla fled for their life, not knowing where to go. But before Raven began to flee, he saw a smirk on Marquess Ostia's face as Raven's father fell at his feet. That was the face Raven would dislike, no despise, for the rest of his life.
Raven opened his eyes, as if that would let the memory go. His anger fueled. That cursed land of Ostia. They find entertainment in killing a innocent man's father. It was time Raven would get even. He was going to show Marquess Ostia how it felt to have pain. Uther was going to know what it was like to lose someone important to you. Raven fingered his blade, that shone with the exact fire that burned in Raven's heart. The fire of hate. Raven turned and strode into camp, where no one was yet awake.
There was a faint morning fog where the camp was. Raven located the area of Lord Hector's tent. He opened the flap and slipped inside. He walked over to where Hector was asleep. His hand drew the sword from it's sheath, and he held it above Marquess Ostia's brother's heart. The tip of the sword made a little bead of blood drip from Hector's chest. Hector flinched but continued sleeping.
Suddenly Raven couldn't bring himself to do it. The memory of his father in the field had come back and was hanging over his head.
"...You will be upset with them, but the only man you can hate is yourself. It is yourself that won't let you forgive them. That is the man to hate."
"Am..I not angry at Ostia..at all?" Raven whispered to himself, "Can...I forgive them? But I feel hate..." The frusturation brought tears to Raven's eyes, and they began to slide without cease down his cheeks.
"It is yourself that won't let you forgive them. That is the man to hate." his memory repeated. Raven closed his eyes shut, the battle of his emotions tearing him apart inside.
"I want to kill the one I hate...I want to forgive, but the one I hate lets me not? I hate...myself...? It is I that won't let me forgive Ostia? The man I hate, the man I want to kill, is myself." Raven now said aloud. He didn't care if it awoke Hector. He didn't care if everyone on Elibe heard.
After a long silence, everything settled for Raven, and he now said in a slow, calm voice, "Very well then."
Three hours later, Priscilla awoke at the sound of Serra's cry, "Aaaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeh!" She opened the flap slowly, and put her hand on her forehead. But it slood off, faint, when she saw the scene.
Laying on the ground outside, with a smile on his face, was a Raven with his sword through his heart.
I'm sorry if this is going to make you depressed for the rest of your life (or the rest of the day). I just felt it was my calling to write this. Read and Review everyone!
♥Cherishly♥