A/N: This story contains violence and sexual content. The first chapter is as bad as it will get in terms of gore, because of the trauma Susan has just endured. You have been warned!
She's wearing lipstick and nylons the day they make her identify the bodies.
She's wearing them because she does not know. She never heard her brother denounce her; never saw the way the Lion's eyes went dark when he did. All she knows is that here is Peter who was once High King over her, grey and still as the statues in the Witch's garden. Here is Edmund, smiling through the blood crusting his face, surely seeing the loveliest dream behind his white eyes. And here is Lucy, little Lu, Queen Lucy the Valiant, and oh God she hardly looks human with her smile torn in half like that, oh God...!
No, no, no, no, Susan screams as she spews her breakfast all over the blood-washed tiles and wonders what terrible thing she did to deserve this. Please, God, no!
She does not sleep that night, or the night after that. Her mind caves on the third night, and she dreams of her sister.
Lucy stands on a green hill, glowing and innocent the way only a girl of eight can be. At her feet lies Cair Paravel and the sea; winged horses soar where the breeze lifts her golden hair to brush the sunset. And the Lion is coming over the hill as the wildflowers bow to kiss his paws and mane. Susan longs to run to him and bury her face in his warm fur, but serpents spring from the ground and bind her with their writhing tails until she cannot move at all.
"Susan!" Lucy calls as the Lion nuzzles her; as she tumbles naked and unashamed into the grass and lets him lick her sprawling limbs. "Have faith, Susan. One day you will join us, but only if you believe!"
She watches as Aslan, who had borne her on his back and let her chase his tail, opens his great mouth wide and devours her sister. You were always his favourite, Lu, she thinks as bones splinter and organs spill; as his fur grows wet and red. I always wished I could be you.
Aslan lifts his mouth from the thing that had once been Lucy and roars, gore flying from his teeth until Susan's face is hot with her sister's blood. And then what's left of Lucy is laughing and laughing, and the roar becomes a train which smashes her awake.