First Multi-chapter fic. Also the longest thing I have ever written.
Matt could feel himself slipping further into the hole. He tried desperately to dig his heels in but there was no traction. His arms ache with the weight of a full grown man. But he's not letting go.
"Matt!" Kelly looks up from where he's dangling above the flames. "I'm sorry." And Kelly lets go. Because he won't pull Matt down with him.
"Kelly!" Matt screams. There's no way down. No way for Kelly to get out. All he can do is watch Kelly burn. "Kelly!"
"Kelly!" Matt bolted up his voice hoarse from screaming. He was shaking franticly, on the verge of sobbing. He's been having the same dream over and over ever since the apartment fire.
He knew that wasn't really what happened. Kelly had walked away from fire without even needing to go to the hospital. But he can't stop seeing it. Every time he closes his eyes he's confronted with the vision of his ex-boyfriend burning to death.
Matt's stomach churned violently. He needs to see Kelly. He needs to see him right now. He doesn't care that its the middle of the night or that Kelly is more likely to yell at him rather than calm his fears. He just has to see him. Matt heads out the door not even bothering to change his clothes.
Kelly was woken up by someone pounding franticlly on the apartment door. He heard Shay grumbling so he didn't bother getting up. Shay was scary when she didn't get her sleep. She'd take care of it.
"Kelly!" Shay yelled. Kelly bolted out of bed. Shay sounded panicked. He ran downstairs ready to kick someone's ass. Then froze at the sight that greeted him.
It was Matt. He was deathly pale and visibly shaking. It looked like he was be on the verge of tears. In all the years they'd know each other Kelly had never seen him like this.
"Matt? What is it? What's wrong?" Kelly began to check Matt over for injuries while Shay hovered in the background. "Talk to me Buddy." Kelly pleaded putting his hands on Matt's shoulders.
With Kelly's obvious concern and the gentle touch Matt let himself collapse against Kelly wrapping his arms around the other man. He needs this. He needs to be able to feel that Kelly is alive. Just for a minute. Please let me have this just for a minute.
Kelly wrapped his arms around Matt supporting the other man as he moved them to the couch. He still didn't know what was wrong but Matt obviously needed him right now. "I've got you Matt." It should be awkward doing this after what happened between them. But it isn't.
Matt ends up practically in Kelly's lap. He puts a hand over Kelly's heart. His fear finally begins to fade with this unmistakeable proof that his nightmare was only a nightmare. "You keep falling. I can't hold you." He whispered.
Something warm swelled up inside Kelly's chest. For the past three months he's been doing his best to maintain an icy demeanor to match the ice inside him. Now it was melting. "I didn't fall. You didn't let me fall. You saved me."
Kelly continued to whisper assurances while rubbing Matt's back soothingly. Matt nestled close. He was so exhausted. And the comfort he was feeling was too hard to resist. He drifted off to sleep feeling better than he had in months.
Kelly was left watching the other man sleep. He didn't try to move afraid of waking Matt. He obviously needs sleep. Kelly frowned at the dark circles surrounding Matt's eyes. Unconsciously he reached out his hand brushing Matt's cheek.
Matt sighed at the soft touch and leaned into it. Kelly was filled with an overwhelming sense of longing. What he and Matt had before Andy's death was something some people sent their entire lives looking for. And they'd lost it.
But Matt still felt something for him. He must if he was able to accept this comfort after how cruel Kelly had been. Matt wasn't a physical person. He didn't accept this type of closeness from just anyone even when he needed it.
Do I still feel something? Kelly refocused on the man in his arms taking everything in. Yes. Its been buried beneath anger, grief, and guilt. But the feelings are still there. He's never cared about anyone like he cares about Matt. He's nearly positive he never will.
Could they fix this? Was it possible to get back what they'd had? Did Matt even want too? Kelly found himself terrified that the answer would be no. Maybe I can convince him. If he can prove to Matt that he'd serious he might stand a chance. As he drifted off Kelly both anticipated and dreaded the morning.