This - along with another 5+ oneshots - has been sitting on my computer since about mid-November and decided I'd look over them, edit them and post them for you.
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or its characters. All mistakes are mine.
The last time he had watched a movie was days ago with a warm body tucked closely beside him. He - surprisingly - missed it. He missed the comfort that came with the weight of another person. His movies had always been a source of escape for him but now, at this point in time, it just reminded him of her.
The way her warm breath would caress across the skin of his neck and lower jaw as she tilted her head from his shoulder to whisper into his ear. It had never made much sense to him. Why would she need to whisper when no one else was in the room? Rarely did they watch movies with other people, unless they wanted to get together with the rest of the team or some of Tony's friends.
The way she would try to distract him while she was bored while she tried to get his attention from the screen to her. Depending on where she was sitting and how would depend on where she began her kissing, usually at the base of his jaw. If she didn't kiss him, she would allow her hand to wonder, around the planes of his chest, his torso, letting her hand slide further down his body until the teasing became too much and the movie became background noise opposed to the main focus.
But now, she was gone. As was their once a week movie sessions on a Thursday nights, filled with movies, alcohol, snacks and each other.
But he let her slip. He let her go, right through the grasp of his fingers. He wasn't committed enough. She didn't say the words, but it didn't take a super genius to work it out. She said it was going no where, but the truth was it was just moving slowly. They knew that beginning a relationship came with its risks, both personally and professionally - especially professionally. Gibbs to name one, every day risks on the field to name another.
He stared at the figures moving across the screen, watched as they had conversations which he was barely paying attention to.
He wanted to forget. Not her, and not the journey the relationship found itself on, but forget that he'd let her so close to him, when in the end that didn't seem to matter, she had still left and he was still alone.
As he contemplated just turning the all too cheerful movie off, a timid but sure knock sounded at the door. He looked towards the time. Midnight. Great.
He stood after attacking the pause button on the remote almost aggressively.
He didn't bother to look through the door at who it was before he opened it; he was fully prepared to tell whoever was to leave. But who he saw made his words freeze mid-sentence.
He couldn't work out why she had rocked up on his door step at midnight dressed like she was. But he was sure he was pretty sure he liked it.
Her hair freely flowing to her shoulders, tamed and smooth, framing her face. The silken fabric of the purple dress hugged her curves perfectly, simple thin straps and a modest neck line that gave nothing away. It stopped just short of her knees. The jacket she clad herself in was falling from one shoulder and the hem fell below her knees. Her black shoes were simple.
Tony's eyes wondered up his ex-girlfriend's figure while she waited patiently outside the door. A sly smirk creeping to her face as she recognised look to his eyes.
It was another minute before she spoke.
"Are you going to let me in, or am I to stay out here and have a conversation with you?" Ziva questioned.
"You can come in," he stated, "I'm just surprised to see you here. To see you in a dress. In heels!" He said, faux surprise echoing through his voice.
"Don't act too surprised, I wore many dresses while we were dating." She walked past him and gave the room a quick sweep with her eyes.
"Yeah, but nothing like that," He argued.
It had been a month since they ended it. A month since they last saw each other outside of work. His apartment hadn't changed one bit.
"New movie?" She questioned, coming to a stop behind the lounge and looking at the frozen image on the screen.
"No, I bought it a while back. It was at the back of the cupboard, I fished it out a decided to watch it again," he replied.
"Good?"
He shrugged. He didn't know what to reply with, he hadn't really been watching it -too caught up in his own thoughts to process it.
"Why are you here?" He asked after silence consumed them, unasked questions lingering in the atmosphere around them.
"I had a date on the other side of town. Some fancy restaurant - hence the attire." She looked down to her front. "But it got until ten before I decided that I did not want to be there, that there was somewhere else I'd rather be, someone else I'd rather be with."
"Who was your date with?" He asked, jealously ringing like church bells through the air.
"Remember that metro detective from last the case that week? Him. He... He was boring; he did not even have any tall stories to share. Honestly, if I wanted to know about the average working day at work, I could have told him, and more accurately described it," She vented, "it got the point where I just told him I had to leave. What?" She demanded at the smile spreading across his face.
They were still standing mere metres from the other, neither knowing how they would act in close proximity with each other. It had been too long.
"Nothing, I just wasn't aware you had a type?" He stated, amusement in his voice.
She narrowed her eyes at him as she took the first daring steps towards him, her stance different, challenging. "What, then, is my type?" she questioned, standing right in front of him, invading his personal space.
He stood seemingly un-phased by her close presence, "Cops," he stated, "Well, people pertaining to the law."
Her head titled to the side and she frowned in thought, "Elaborate?"
"Well, you dated Ray," he began, "he was the CIA, he had something to do with the law. You dated me, ex-metro-cop now one of NCIS' finest special agents. And then you dated whoever that guy was tonight."
"I would hardly classify him as a cop," Ziva murmured, avoiding his eyes.
A familiar silence that Ziva seemed to settle into surrounded them while they chose their next moves. There was hesitance, mixed with the security of the atmosphere.
"Why are you really here, Ziva?" Tony asked after a moment.
"I just told you-"
"Which is no doubt true, but it doesn't explain why you showed up on my doorstep," He stated, "Why did you come?"
She sighed heavily and turned away from him, seating herself on his lounge.
"I was thinking. I have been doing a lot of thinking. I made a mistake and now I am beginning to think I want to take it back," she began, "I told you it was going too slow, but that was not the truth at all."
"So why did you leave me then?" He asked, sitting beside her.
"I was scared," She admitted after a moment.
"What was there to be scared of Ziva?" He asked.
She sat in silence for a moment, stuck between the part of her that wanted to share what was happening in her mind compared to what was happening in her heart and the part telling her it was none of his business.
She opened her mouth and inhaled as if she was going to speak only to shut it again and pause.
"I was scared of what was happening," She stated after a prolonged moment.
"And what exactly was happening?" He questioned.
"Not so much what was happening, it was really no different than being friends, just more intimate, and with that came stronger feelings than I had before, and I had suddenly realised I could not hide from them, so I left them," She explained, "Can we please not talk about this, I am not good at it."
"You're going fine," Tony encouraged, wanting her to continue, wanting to understand, "You were scared of your feelings?" He asked for clarification.
"Yes," she admitted.
"What, in your time on this Earth, made you fear them?" He asked.
She leant forward and placed her elbows on her knees, entwining her hands and looking at them.
"What made you fear yours?" She replied, choosing the easiest option.
"My judgement, the fact that the first women I'd wanted to married left me the day before our wedding and my father never dealt with his emotions well, and I mean, I didn't have mum to teach me when I needed to be taught the most. So I took what I saw worked for Dad, I guess," He said.
"Are you being honest?" She asked softly.
"Why would I lie?" He said, "Your turn."
She hesitated before answering. "Everyone that I have gotten close to ends up hurting me or abruptly taken from me as Mossad, we were not allowed to feel emotion on the job - I worked too much, not feeling became habit," she said, "I left you because of me. It is selfish, but I needed to get out before you decided you had had enough."
Her words hung in the air and ran through his head. The longer it took him to reply, the more fidgety Ziva became, twiddling her thumbs. She pulled her jacket tighter around her, suddenly feeling colder. Some light locks of her deep wavy hair fell from where it was held back by her ear, curtaining her face from his with a thin sheet.
He moved slightly closer, brushing the hair away from her face and kissing her neck below her ear, his lips lingering before he whispered, "Don't you trust me?" He kissed her again, this time closer to her jaw.
She turned her head, though, limiting the access he had, and looked at him incredulously. "I trust you with my life, Tony, I thought you knew that."
"But you can't trust me with your heart," he stated.
"I do," she argued.
"Then what have you been on about this whole time?"
"That is what scares me," She said, "Look, I did not come here to ask you back, despite what I may want, I came here to tell you not to blame yourself with what happened. It is all me, I was the one who had the trouble committing. It surprised me how committed you actually were," she said.
She looked over her shoulder to the simple white wall clock. "I better be going," She added.
She motioned to stand, being stopped when Tony took hold of her wrist and pulled her towards him. She half landed on him as he leant back a long the length of the lounge. Her hands landed on his shoulders and his hand cradled the back of her head, gentle pressure at the back of her head caused her to press her lips hesitantly against his.
He pulled away from her and said, "I'm not going to intentionally hurt you. And you know what, now we know where we went wrong and we can work through it together, we can work through my commitment issues and yours together. We can be the most dysfunctional functional relationship in town." He smiled, "How does that sound?"
Ziva looked down at his face while she adjusted her position over him, moving to straddle his lower body with her knees. A small smile crossed her face as she nodded, before ducking her head and kissing him gently again, their lips moving in complete sync with the other.
Please Review :)