The Great Fic of...Well...Nothing
By, the Great, Amazing, Gorgeous Laura da' Evil Gemini and Sara the Tasty and Delicious Marshmellow. Who Don't Own Anything.
Really. Anything. We Don't Even Own A Dictionary.
The Names "the Great, Amazing, Gorgeous Laura da' Evil Gemini and Sara the Tasty and Delicious Marshmellow" Are Copyrighted Though.
Laura Anderson danced through the halls of Hogwarts. The student's stared at her in disbelief.
Not only was she a teacher dancing down the halls, she was wearing boxers and a t-shirt that read "Gryffindors suck".
Harry Potter shook his head and turned to Ron, "You know, out of all of the DADA professors we've had so far, she is by far the craziest."
Since Ron's mouth was full of éclairs, he could only nod to show his agreement.
Hermione cringed and said, "She's...not that bad.."
Of course, at that moment, Professor Anderson decided to waltz up to them, and say "Wo ist meine Socken?"
At the sight of their confused faces, Anderson laughed and then sang out: "The Nasty Gryffie Threesome should be in their classes!"
Ron frowned, "But, we're on our way."
"Do you not have Potions next?" Anderson quirked an eyebrow.
"Yes, but we'll make it there in time." Hermione said somewhat snootily.
That caused Anderson to merely giggle somewhat insanely, and chirp, "Not anymore. You've got approximately...1 minute to get there!"
As the Dreaded Trio dashed to the dungeons, Anderson yelled out, "Oh yes, and when you get there, tell Snapey, that the Crazy American stole his boxers and not that nasty icky Gryffie."
Anderson sashayed her way to her classroom quite contently, albeit a shad bit lonely seeing nobody really talked to her. She paused outside the classroom's door, she heard more rumors of the crazy American DADA professor. That, dampened her mood a bit.
"I do not wear lacey thongs, I wear fuzzy ones." Anderson proclaimed as she burst through the class door.
This of course, made people stare even more. "Morning Class!!" She Went On To Say, "Today We Will Be..." She was Cut Short By The Sound Of A Student Entering The Room. "Your Late Sara. That's Not Like You. What Happened?"
"Oh You Know. My Dads Having A Fit About Whom I Choose To Date. He Yelled At Me In front Of His Entire Class. Please Excuse My Lateness." The Student Set Her Things Next To The Professors Desk. "What Did I Miss?"
"Well I WAS Gonna Introduce You But Since Your Here You Might As Well Do It." Anderson Danced Over To Her Desk And Started To Doodle On A Piece Of Paper That Said "Grifindor Suxs XP"
Sara went on to say, "All Right Class! My Name Is Sara Snape. I'm A 4th Year Slytherin And I'll Be The Teacher Assistant. If She Falls Ill Or Is Absent For Any Reason, I'll Be Teaching This Class. If You Have Any Questions Feel Free To Ask The Ones You Cant Use Common Sense To Answer. Oh, And I Don't Like Any Of You Until You Give Me A Reason To Like You."
The Professor Gets Up Out Of Her Seat And Leaves The Room.
"Oh And If Any Of You Report Her Leaving The Class And I Find Out Who Did It. Your In For A World Of Hurt." Sara added.
Anderson grinned as she left the class. She sauntered her way down to the dungeons while humming "Roses are Red" by Aqua.
Once she finally got to the potions room, Anderson made her grand entrance by singing out loud "Roses are red, violets are blue, honey is sweet, but not as sweet as youu!"
This made all of the students stare at her, giving Anderson a feeling of de ja vue. Snape was horrified, the damn crazy American was visiting him...again.
"Snape, did the filthy Gryffies give you my message?" Anderson said in a bored tone.
"No." Snape said as he gave her a poisonous look.
Anderson's expression changed from insane-happy to dead calm-I-will-kill-you; she looked at the Dreaded Threesome.
"Hell. There will be HELL." was all she said before changing her countenance to happy-insane again and proceeding to sit upon Snape's desk and thumbing through his papers.
"That...was bloody scary." Ron said to Harry.
Anderson stopped looking through Snape's papers and glared a glare much akin to Snape's at Ron, then, in a singsong voice said,"20 points off Gryffindor for idiocy."
"But!" Ron started, but was cut off by another 30 point deduction.
Sighing, Anderson turned to Snape, who was trying to pull himself together and said "Snape lovey, you should keep your students more in line."
"Oh, and I suppose you could do that better than I?" Snape spat out.
"Yes, I could, I just don't wish to." Anderson leaped off the desk and sauntered toward Snape. She gave him a quick kiss, then left and said, "Ta ta for now! Don't forget about our lunch date in Sweden!"
All Snape could say was "Damn American." Laura Stuck Her Head Back Through To Door. "Oh By the way, Your Daughter Does A Better job At Keeping The Students In Line Better Then You Do. In Fact. She's Teaching My Class Right Now. Ta Ta."
She Skipped The Entire Way Back To Her Class. As She Reached The Door She Could Hear Counting. "Why On Earth Would They Be Counting?" She Opened The Door To Find The ENTIRE Class Doing Push-ups! "Sara!"
"Yes Professor?"
"Why Are They Doing Push-ups?"
"They Were Teasing Me About Dating Harry Potter"
One Of The Student Broke Into Laughter.
"50 MORE POINTS FROM RAVENCLAW!!" Sara Yelled At The Student.
The Bell Choose That Time To Ring, Dismissing The Class Faster The Lightening.