A Lustrous, Warm hand is pressing against my skin; settled on my waist, crawling over my bare body whilst the other has been placed at the back of my head as he kisses me fast yet slow but passionately. He reaches for the zipper of his extravagantly expensive black trousers which must be new considering I have never seen him wear them before, once he has token them off after quite a struggle he throws them swiftly onto the floor and gets back into position.
I figure that if he took some of his clothing I could at least do the same. So I start to unbutton my baby blue polo for him to jerk over my head and to trail his finger tips over my chest, pushing them forward as he remains to kiss me but then lifts himself up, looking directly into my eyes.
He then gradually starts to move himself below until he finds himself the perfect spot beside my cock in which he can suck. He begins at a mild pace but then unleashes the true Brendan Brady. Fast, wild and tingling just how I like it!
Oh God, that luminous white light is shining vividly in my eyes.
"Ste" The sound of Noah's abrupt tone startled me. "Wake up sleepy head" he says with a big cheery grin on his face.
"Yh..." I reply not knowing what else to say. He then leaves, I assume he realises how tired and strained I must feel from the expression in my voice. What just Happened? Was I dreaming? It felt, looked, sounded, smelt and even tasted real. That's all 5 of my senses. It's also the 5th time I've dreamt of him this week. I need to stop this now! I Love Noah not Brendan but there is something binding me with Brendan, a connection if you will. He has seriously got me going Crazy. I swear I'm going to end up in Cornhill soon.
Sudden Vibrations come from my front pocket.
"Who's that from?" Noah asks as if he's trying to interrogate me, pick into my brain!
"Just work." Genuinely it's not like I'm lying to him. It is from work, Just from Brendan that's all! It's always from Brendan!
"Warren wants me to work an Extra shift tonight" I had to say that so he doesn't get suspicious although he looks at me as if I am some sort of ignorant phony. I'm not intending to feed him any lies but I know how much he despises Brendan, He literally hates his guts. He would go ballistic if he found out I still talked to him but I have to I mean he is my boss! I can't ignore him, it's quite impossible.
I could about this the whole day but both my rusty old watch and the Blinding deep orange clock which I believe Amy bought from Argos ( only because it was on sale for a tenner ) tell me it's time to head to work.
I hold onto the arms of the side chair to pull myself up from the vintage form. Noah is sitting on the settee opposite me; legs sprawled, only wearing boxers way to tight, those big brown eyes staring into the TV. I go over to kiss him goodbye so I give a peck on the lips and tell him goodbye. Jeremy Kyle's on so he barely reacts. As I walk out the front door from behind I can hear him shout " love you" I walk out the door, what am I suppose to say to that "oh yeah I love you to but only as a friend, my true love is Brendan, I can never stop loving Brendan. I am totally and irrevocably in love with Brendan Brady. Oh by the way just thought you should know I've been using you the past couple months to make him jealous, to show him much he really does love me and to get my life back on track! But he used to beat me up because he is gay himself but won't admit it so took it out on me which is why I'm safer with you and am going to stay with you, Thank you" From that I would be confused for a bad person which I am also from that you can bluntly see that I still want to be with Brendan because I fucking love the guy! God, I am so confused! I can almost smell the confusion in the air! I need to figure this out!
It's either Brendan or Noah!
Noah; Caring, Loving, Openly gay which is a bonus, beautifully big brown eyes; not afraid to be himself, loyal, compassionate, a delightful smile, just a perky person overall.
Then Brendan; Dangerous, Cocky, psychotic, bold, bitter, Sometimes scary and cold hearted but then again he is the most affectionate, Cheekiest which for some reason I actually like, tender, protective, Devoted, warm person you could ever meet and he's good with kids which I can't say the same for Noah.
Whoever should I choose?
Whoa...
"Ouch" You may not have noticed but I just fell! "Mother fucker" And yes it hurt like hell. Mustn't have been looking where I was going or something. All I know is that I landed in front of chezchez.
"Have a nice trip?" There's that voice again. Deep, beautiful Irish voice. I turn my head to the side so I can look him in the eyes.
"Stephen" he says. Oh god that voice. That beautiful fucking sexy voice, half the time I may not understand a word he says but damn that is one hell of a sexy voice.
*cough* "Brendan" Oh shit how embarrassing I coughed.
He laughs a bit before he grabs onto my arm to help me up. What a squeeze he gives my arm, his hand is remarkably crushing against my arm.
"Are you alright?" He says bending down a little so his face can get in level with mine.
"Yh" I reply in full confidence.
"Good" He says still bent down and remaining to stare into my eyes. I'm gazing back into them, I can't help it. He seems like he's happy today, really happy yet a tad worried. What's happened to make him look so little worried? More importantly what's made him look this happy? Has he found someone else? A new guy for him to fool around with, has he forgotten all about what I and he had? I hope not! Or maybe just maybe he's in a cheery mood this morning and if so why? Well I wouldn't find out even if I tried, he never opens up to me about anything apart from any drug dealings or his latest instalment of Warren's life.
God, I must be pathetic! I got all that just by looking into his eyes, I know now that there is something terribly wrong with me! I have fallen deeply for Brendan Brady!
He clears his throat and straightens himself and his suit.
"Glasses need cleaned inside" He tells me trying to act as cool as possible. Chewing away like a cow would when gorging one's food meaning grass for a cow. I think.
I can tell he's uncomfortable with everyone around us seeing our little staring moment back then.
It's not like anything actually happened! Everyone already knows he's gay!
I'm quite angry now, so I brush past him and almost run up the chezchez stairs. As if I'm striding.
He follows after me taking the hint. He calls after me but warren's there and he doesn't want to start anything especially with him in the room.
I don't think I could have put up with it anyway! Another fight! We've had too many!
The thing really bugs me is that no matter how many times we fight, shout at each other from the top of our lungs. I always end up back in his bed, in a warm, strong tight embrace with him.
It's as if he has some sort of control over me!
He makes me incredibly angry sometimes yet I always end up fucking him breathless afterwards.
He remains in my heart always! No matter what! And I don't know how.
Maybe we are supposed to be together! Maybe! I mean are we?
*Lady gaga – Born this way*
The music is blaring, the club is packed, some guys are trying to get laid, chez is dancing, warrens in a strop, and Rhys is snogging Jacqui and Brendan's locked himself in the office.
Just another normal day at chezchez!
"Hey Love!" Chez says parading over to the bar, half drunk. Wearing a hell of a tight boob – tube dress, multi – coloured and up to her ass, Neon pink tights and platform heels which I imagine she can't walk in due to the fact she's wobbling from side to side and can't even walk in a straight line. Although that could possibly be because of how drowsy and wasted she is.
"Chez, what can I get you?"
"A life for my brother!" she must have found herself funny by the horrid snort that she gave after she had said that. I look at her with a serious face on, well my attempt of a serious face.
"Just joking love, I'll have a martini" with a Beaming smile on her face.
I go get the equipment needed for her martini.
"You know he does care for you, Ste?" asking in a manner which would seem if she was some sort of cupid. Trying to get me and him together!
I pass her the martini very sleekly then make a move over to some punters needing served! I really can't put up with this right now!
She must have taken the hint much like Brendan earlier when she heads back to the dance floor; swinging her hips to the music, giving her hair a swish, shaking her ass and leaping up and down so her tits are on show.
The music is extremely loud, literally piercing. I can barely hear anything else.
All I can see is drunken idiots attempting to dance, girls flaunting their stuff of which the boys are intrigued by, lots of sexual affections being displayed and colours of blue, red, yellow, green, purple etc. ,Dazzling into my eyes.
And then there's the office door. I peer into, thinking of all the possible things that Brendan may be attaining to. I stare quite deep into it.
"Can I get a drink over here?" How rude? Well it is Doug! And right now I guess he's going through a hard time. His Girlfriend, I mean love has just been murdered by an unknown psychopath leaving a trail of dead girls in the woods. He looks depressed, like he hasn't had a shower in a few days, weeks even. I feel sorry for him! If I lost my love then...
I'm not even going to finish that sentence.
"Umm, yh sorry... I must have been staring into space again" I gave a little laugh at the end which I regret. "So, what will it be?" changing the subject.
"Just another beer thanks" He raises his eyebrows as soon as he finishes the sentence. Either he wants me to hurry so he can get back to his mates apart from Noah, he's been called off to Cindy's for some sort of emergency or He just can't put up with life anymore.
I don't want to seem nosy, so I grab a beer pass it to him and keep my mouth shut and my nose out!
He just stays there; at the bar, looking at his beer with full dismay only taking little sips at a time, he has bags under his eyes making me think that he mustn't have had a good night's sleep in a while.
He looks up at me, he notices me staring back at him.
"Don't..." He pauses; he must find it difficult to say. I can almost see a tear away to run down his cheek. "Don't say sorry!" He blurts out. "Please"
"Wasn't going to" I reassure him in the best way I can.
"Why not, everyone else has" He has that look on his face as if he's being sarcastic but he's not.
"It's your business no one else's" replying in a way that I hope can make him feel better.
"Tell everyone else that" He looks back down at his bottle but instead this time he takes a huge gulp then places the bottle back on the table.
"Tell me Ste" I look up at him thinking of all the things he could say." Have you ever been in love, fallen so hard you don't ever want to get up again, kept an open space in your heart for them, loving every bone, every limb, and every organ, just everything about them! , To have it taken away from you so easily" He tells me this with a fair bit of tears running down his face at a mild speed.
You can imagine who I am thinking of right now! Every word he just said!
I answer each of those questions in my head one by one.
Yes I have been in love, yes so I don't want to get up again, yes there is always a space in my heart for him, I do love his strong healthy bones, each and every limb, every organ, Everything and no I have never had it token away from me apart from when I push him away or the other way round but no I don't want to lose him! , Never, ever, ever.
"Trust me, you don't want to" He carries on. Looking me in the eyes! , His ice blue eyes glowing into mine.
"Oi Doug", Riley shouts from behind him.
He gives him a look and a nod, Must be his way of telling him that he'll be there in a minute.
He looks back at me, there go those eyes again, picks up his beer from the counter and then finally leaves.
It seems Doug's taught me something new today. You never know what you've got till you lose it.
Huh, a new tip for Brendan I'd say.
I slam the door and shove my body thought it. God, I am so tired!
As soon as I walk into the Living room, Noah approaches his body standing right in front of me.
"How was work?" That cheery smile back again, with his teeth as well.
"The usual" replying to his question with a yawn as I am fucking tired!
He picks up on that because he kisses me on the lips gently and leads me to the bedroom.
He starts to undress himself but I am too tired. Especially for sex!
He sits himself on top of me but I push him off, close my eyes and go to sleep.
Let's hope I don't get any more of my Brendan fantasies! That'll be the 6th time!
Thank you for reading!
This is my first ever fan fiction and I hope and pray I did it well and that you enjoy it!
I'm currently thinking of righting more to this story, so will see what happens!
If you could post a review on what you thought of the story, liked/disliked about it then I'd really appreciate. Or if you would like to tell me of what you would like to see in the next chapters to come, Thx.