AN: This is post season 11's "Spooked." Contains spoilers from the episode, big time. Also from "Fault" but if you haven't seen "Fault" yet, you're crazy. The inner-workings of Elliot Stabler's mind are as follows. ;) Enjoy my lovelies! :)

He hadn't felt like this in three years. Hadn't thought about her like this in three years. Hadn't pictured her like this in three years. And yet here he was, three years later, wanting nothing more than to run his fingers through that God damn hair of hers. It was long again like it had been…three year ago.

He didn't know if it was the hair, or if it was him –that bastard who just kept waltzing back into their lives at the worst possible moments. (He'd always hated the FBI.) But one thing was for sure, his feelings for his partner had returned.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It had started out like any other day. He and Olivia were trying to identify the victims they'd found the night before. They'd found the girl's driver's license and were interviewing her roommate, when it became apparent that someone was trying to break in to the girl's apartment. Guns raised, the detectives waited for the door to finally open. A gun was the first thing they saw.

"Detective Benson?"

Elliot's grip tightened on his gun.

"Agent Porter?"

It took him everything he had not to drop his gun right then and there. With his luck, it would have gone off and shot him in the foot. The moment he looked over at his partner and the FBI agent, he felt a familiar twinge. A twinge he thought he had long since suppressed.

As the case wore on, Agent Dickhead became more and more annoying. The more he flirted with her, talked to her, looked at her, the more Elliot wanted to punch him. Even when Olivia would return a smile or a look, it was still Porter he wanted to hit.

It posed a very puzzling question: why did he care so much? Was it because he knew the guy was a douche bag and didn't want to see his partner get hurt? Or was it because he wanted his partner all to himself? He didn't know and he was afraid to find out.

EEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOO

When the tip came in that their main suspect would be at the JFK airport that afternoon, Porter decided he needed to come along "for the drugs." They were spread out through out the airport, looking for their suspect. Elliot spotted him and told Olivia to come over and help. She made her way over to where the man was standing. He envisioned the man pulling out a knife and slitting her throat. The victims had been killed that way…

The man started to lead her away, having made her for a cop. Elliot watched in horror as his arm snaked around her waist and pulled her gun from the holster. One name was on the tip of his tongue as he called for backup to meet them in the parking lot: Gitano. But this time, the roles were reversed. This time she was the one with a gun to her head and he was the one holding her life in his hands. He'd never realized how hard this had been on her; not until now.

As he stood there silently begging him not to take away one of the only good things he had left in his life, she started talking to her captor. Through frantic tears, Olivia called him a liar and questioned him about the victims. It amazed Elliot how she was always so strong all of the time.

Then a shot was fired and both Olivia and Rojas went down.

"Olivia!"

He was in the bus station. Olivia was on the floor bleeding. He thought she was dead.

Elliot rushed to his fallen partner and scooped her up in his arms.

"It's okay. The blood's all his."

She was shaking as he held her. The sweet scent of her shampoo wafted into his nostrils and he had to resist the urge to bury his head in her hair. Elliot felt Olivia press into his embrace.

He scanned the crowd, trying to find the shooter. His eyes fell on Porter. That son-of-a-bitch could have killed her! his head screamed. Now more than ever he wanted to punch the bastard, but he refused to let Olivia out of his arms.

When Olivia found the need to stand up, he reluctantly let her go. Some Suit approached them, wanting statements. He looked over at his partner, who still looked pretty shaken up.

"I'll go first," he told the Suit.

As he followed the officer away from the scene of the crime, he couldn't help but look back at her. Porter was talking to her and she was smiling. The twinge came back.

That night he'd laid awake in bed, unable to stop analyzing the day's situation. Porter had taken the shot he hadn't had the balls to take. In truth, the bastard had saved her life. And what had he, himself, done? Stood there in panic as a four-year-old event played on repeat in his head. He should've been the one to take the shot, to save her. That smile was meant for him.

She never smiled anymore, at least not around him. Four years later, the tension from the day when they had both chosen each other over the job was still present. It hadn't gone anywhere, only increased. He longed for the days before the tension, back when she actually talked to him.

Elliot found himself thinking back to three years ago.

"You're the longest relationship I've ever had with a man. Who else would put up with me?"

Porter would. The thought made his blood boil. Olivia was too good for him. She was too good for anyone…

Kathy rolled over, taking the sheets with her. The last time Elliot had felt like this, he was in the process of getting divorced. This time he wasn't separated. This year she wasn't pushing for a divorce. He suddenly felt trapped. He was obligated to Kathy, but the wave of jealously that washed over him whenever he saw Porter and Olivia together was unbearable. He couldn't feel this way again. He was married. Olivia didn't belong to him; she was free to flirt with whomever she wanted.

But he couldn't deny the fact that he felt something. He couldn't deny the fact that he'd felt something four years ago when he thought Gitano had killed her. He couldn't deny that those feelings had never left.

He grunted and pulled back some of the sheets from Kathy. Elliot wanted Porter gone. The moment he showed up, these feelings he didn't want came back. He was sure that if Porter left, his feelings for his partner would go back to being platonic. Either that or at least his feelings would simmer down to something less…sexual.

EEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOO

The case wore on and Porter was still present and as annoying as ever. Then an interesting twist suggested Porter wasn't actually one of the good guys. Cragen had the "brilliant" idea to use Olivia as bait to find out.

Elliot found himself in her bedroom with Morales, waiting for Porter to come over for his date. He'd been in her apartment dozens of times, but never her bedroom. He had hoped that his first time in there would have been with her…

There was a knock on the front door, signaling that Porter was here. Elliot listened as his partner seduced the FBI agent in a sultry voice. He wondered how that voice would sound as he… snap out of it Stabler! You're married!

"You helped me through that whole thing with Simon and you saved my life three days ago. I never got the chance to properly thank you."

He knew she was kissing him now. Lately it had been her "you can trust me" tactic. First Stuckie, now…

The image filled his head of the two of them together. Porter's tongue down her throat and his hand working its way through her silky stands of hair… He shook off the frightening image and sent a text to Cragen to make the call. As Olivia's cell started ringing, Elliot realized she never wore her hair naturally anymore. He found her curls even more tantalizing.

Once Olivia had shooed Porter away because she "had a case," Elliot came out of her bedroom. He noticed something in her eyes that resembled sadness. He ignored it, like always, and asked her something about the case. He missed her response because he was too busy taking in the way her dress accented her curves.

EEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOO

The case was finally coming to an end. They had Terri in custody and she'd just confessed. It was only a matter of time before they busted Porter's ass as well. Things would be normal again after that; he was sure of it.

But then Porter burst through the interrogation room door and demanded that Terri be released. Cragen came up behind him and explained he'd been given an order to let both Terri and Porter walk. He watched as Olivia's hands clenched into fists. Elliot hoped she was going to punch the traitor.

He excused himself from the room as she started yelling, but he didn't go far. Elliot watched them through the two-way mirror, needing to see where this was going. She asked him how he could just cover up the deaths of two people; asked him why he didn't trust her.

"It's a matter of National Security. Out feelings don't matter."

With that, Porter left the room leaving Olivia in tears. She stared into her reflection, but Elliot felt like she was staring right at him. He'd never seen Olivia Benson look so defeated.

AN: You know what to do. ;) Send love!!!