Eyelash Curlers && Butcher Knives

A/N: Okay, so here it is! Finally, right? I have been waiting a really long time to actually start this little story of mine, and now I'm beginning to write it! Enjoy and review!

Bella's POV

I hate my life, Those four little words repeatedly ran through my head.

Just one name sends my thoughts into a darker dimension of hell, and that name is… Edward Cullen.

I don't really have one reason to why I have such a large distaste in him. It's everything that annoys me. He is always so dark and moody. And even though I'm trapped inside this pathetic little human body, for right now, doesn't mean I'm ugly. But yet I always catch him giving me the look, as I like to call it. Plus, he's a horrible kisser, and I have to deal with that each and everyday of my sad life!

I sighed inwardly as Edward blabbed about his night with Alice. Oh yeah, that was another thing that bothered me; He hung out with his "sister" more than with me.

Talk about a sick freak!

"So then Alice said, 'That's not a toad! That's a caecilian!'" Edward laughed so hard the table shook, and I plastered a fake and cheesy feeling smile on my face. After I was sure Edwad- oops, I mean Edward, wasn't looking I turned my head towards Angela and mouthed the words, 'What the hell's a caecilian?' She merely shrugged and continued sipping from her overly expensive slushy.

"Oh Bella, I have to have a talk with you tonight about something rather important."

Joy,

Suddenly the bell rang and the lunchroom was ten timers noisier than before. Humans are so messy, I thought in with pity.

"Well time to go darling, Ill pick you up after class." With that he kissed me chastely on the lips and darted through the off white metal doors. Usually we would go to the same biology class, but I changed classes and came up with some lie to feed Edwad. Being the special boyfriend he is, he no second thoughts about it at all.

I gasped in shock when I was tapped on the arm. Stupid human not-so-great senses.

"Rizzie, I say we ditch. This is getting real boring real fast. And I don't want to have to walk home again, just because you and your stupid boyfriend decided to rider together." She sounded annoyed. Better not make her any more mad,

"I know, it's just… this has to look good. It has to look real. And is it just me, or is this whole human thing kind of wearing you down." I asked.

"No, it's not just you. And by the way, I don't just see why you cant kill Edward right now. What good is it to just have him hanging around?"

I sighed and turned towards her. "Fine, we'll ditch, but you know why I cant just kill him. As much as I want to, I have to wait until Aro gives us our regular bodies back."

"Thos freaking sucks," Angela growled and then quickly clutched onto my hand. "We gotta go. Edward's looking for you." She stated sarcastically.

"Kay, and I vote we call Aro tonight." She nodded in agreement before we were sprinting through the glass doors and out into the parking lot.

Later That Evening

You have three new messages. New Message: Friday, 3:01."Bella, why weren't you there at the end of class? Are you sick? Are you bleeding? Did Jacob hurt you? Cause if he did I swear to-" Message deleted. New Message: Friday 3:02. "Bella its been a whole minute later, and your scent isn't anywhere in this school building. You better march your butt back here before-" Message Deleted. New Message: Friday 3:30. "Bella, I'm coming over. I have to talk to you about some stuff. Ill be over in five minutes. Hope your pleasant."

"Damn…" I muttered glancing at the clock. Three thirty-five. And as if, right on cue, in comes Edwad, not bothering to knock. That pissed me off, just a bit.

"Edwad- Erhm I mean Edward, what if I had just gotten out of a towel? Or there had been blood all over the floor? What would you have done then? God, you need to start knocking." My words were sharp as razors, and they sliced him open deep.

"I'm sorry," Edwad looked at the floor, refusing to meet my eyes.

"And what's with all the messages? I'm not stupid, ya know? One message could have done the trick!" I knew what I said hurt him, but I learned a long time ago not to care.

"I'm sorry. I just didn't know where you were. I was only looking out for you." Once again his eyes didn't meet mine.

"No, I'm sorry. I just have been a little stressed lately. I rubbed my temples, and fought the headache that was right around the corner. Damn you, human experiences.

"Yeah, listen, I know this is a bad time, but I really have to talk to you." Did he even care about my well-being at all? Didn't I just tell him I was stressed? Is he deaf?

I glared at him as he took my hand and led me outside. My thighs had been sore from the extra ten laps we had to run in gym that day, so the constant moving only added to that problem.

When we were twenty feet into the woods, Edwad dropped my hand and backed a few paces away. I rolled my eyes and sighed. A little mellow-dramatic, if you ask me. What, was he going to ask me to marry him?

"Bella, I don't know how to say this but…you're boring. You never want to talk to me. You always try to dodge me in school. It seems like you throw up a bit when we kiss, what's going on with you?"

Oh now he didn't. He was not going to be the one to dump the other. That was my expertise. And he was about to find all that out.

"No, Edwardo, there's something wrong with you. You're way too protective of me, your kissing is worse than frenching a monkey, and you smell like a damp old rag left in the laundry room to rot. I hate the way you never laugh, except when it has to do with Alice. I hate how you barge in on me, even after I've told you to knock. And I hate how you say sorry but never mean it." After my little rant I noticed his jaw was open all the way.

'Well then, bet you're glad to know that we are moving." He said after he composed his self. Then it was my turn to have my trap hanging wide open.

"What?" I hissed out between my teeth. Aro was going to be so pissed.

"Yeah, we're moving. Everyone. Have fun here by yourself, Bella." He acted smug, but behind that distorted face was one full of regret and sadness. And then her left. There was no sweet kiss. No ' love you' Just the soft rattle of leaves that had been picked up by the artificial wind.

Well, first things first, I thought, Find Hannah(Angela), and then get our vampire bodies back.