Chapter One

She smiled as she let the music wash over her, arms stretched above her head clutching a half drunk bottle of vodka. Moving in time to the beat she felt herself slipping away to a place where only the music existed, where the only thing that mattered was to keep dancing because as long as did she wouldn't have to let those thoughts crept into her mind and take away the calm that had finally allowed her to relax. To smile.

It felt like it had been a life time since Naomi had spoken to her, had poured her heart out to her, even if it had been through a door, and since then she hadn't heard anything from the blonde. Whilst she wanted desperately to speak to the other girl Emily had received no answer to her texts or calls, and it seemed as though Naomi was taking every opportunity to avoid her at college. Eventually she felt her will to fight fading; there was only so much rejection she could handle and she was pretty sure she'd had enough to last a good few years in just a short space of time. She knew she loved Naomi but all she seemed to get in return was a broken heart, and being constantly pushed away was starting to take its toll on the redhead's already low self-esteem.

Emily urged herself to quieten the thoughts that pushed their way into her mind, gulping at the drink in her hand she winced as she felt the alcohol burn its way down her throat. Breathing deeply she continued to dance even as she felt a pair of hands snake their way around her body. Leaning back into the touch she willed herself to let go and to forget that the hands defiantly didn't belong to the person she hoped could be here with her, as she felt a harsh kiss being placed on her neck she winced as contrasting memories of the night at the lake flashed through her mind.

'Emily!' the scream came in her ear, and she couldn't help but smile as she rolled her eyes at Cook.

Wanting to lose herself once more she continued to dance until she felt a strong hand grab her by the wrist and tug her away from her friend. Frowning she turned to face the intruder and was surprised see Katie, it had been a long time since her twin had come to her rescue, which Emily assumed was what Katie had been intending. As she allowed herself to be dragged through the club the forcefulness the grasp made Emily rethink her sister's status as rescuer. Barging people out of the way the twins reached the exit and Emily gasped as the cold night hair hit her hot skin.

'What the hell are you doing?' Katie screeched as she stole the bottle from her sister's hand 'You let that wanker put his hands all over you!'

Trying to focus on staying upright the normally quiet girl felt anger building in her chest and it took all her restraint not to launch herself at her counterpart 'I was having fun, beside I didn't think you would object…it all about cock right?!'

'Too right babe' Cook laughed as he swaggered up being Emily and wrapped an arm around the girl 'It's all about the Cook!'

Shrugging off the offending arm she watched her sister glare in Cook's direction 'Fuck off' the sisters yelled in unison equally angry

'What's with all this hostility girls? I thought we were having a good time' he winked at Emily as he took a swig from a beer he seemed to have snatched from nowhere 'There's enough to go around'

Ignoring him Katie turned her attention back to Emily 'What's with you lately? Is it that dyke Campbell? I told you to watch out for that skank, what did she do?

'Nothing, and don't call her that!'

Smirking Katie retorted 'Dyke or skank? Either way it's true. I saw you on the bouncy castle Em, how you could let her kiss you? It's fucking disgusting, you're disgusting.'

Hearing Cook laugh and mutter something crude Katie began to shout now as she confronted her twin, invading her personal space and forcing her to back up against the wall of the club.

And don't blame it on drugs; I know that's just bullshit. Tell me the truth, what the hell is your problem?'

Stunned into silence Emily tried desperately to gather her thoughts as she felt the coldness of the bricks against her back. She wanted to scream at her sister, to tell her she was gay that she was in love with Naomi. She wanted Naomi to come storming out of the club and tell her she loved her just as much, She wanted a lot of things, but was slowly starting to realise that as much as she hoped and wished, things never worked out for her. She was gay, rejected by the girl she loved and even worse she had never felt lonelier as she did now watching her twin turning against her.

'What the fuck are you doing?'

The voice that came cutting through the night air was like a lifeline to the speechless redhead, as she watch Naomi followed by the rest of the gang flood out of the doors and come bounding up to the trio.

'You stay out of this' Katie shouted glancing in the blonde's direction before focusing back on her sister 'you've done enough already, freak'

Emily watched the blonde eye up the situation as a million different scenarios raced through her brain.

'Just chill out everyone, okay' Freddie tried, taking his girlfriends hand to pull her away from Emily at the same time removing the bottle from her hand 'Katie, come on lets go inside'

The girl relented slightly and allowed herself to step back slightly, only to turn to face Naomi. The tension between to two evident to the group as they observed the heavy silence that fell between the girls.

'What did you do to my sister?' Katie asked, the anger causing her voice to shake as she stepped forwards.

Once again Freddie intervening putting himself between the blonde and redhead, but this time he found herself shoved out of the way as Katie continued on with a determined glare. Emily watched still momentarily frozen as her twin stood face to face with the girl she loved 'I said; what the hell did you do to her?'

It was like a switch had been flicked in Emily's brain, as though something had finally broken, as she watched the scene unfold before her. Like a wild animal she felt the anger explode as she launched herself off the wall and grabbed her twin by the arm twisting her round violently. Then she found her voice.

'She didn't do anything to me and there is nothing wrong with me' the redhead raged letting the words she had bottled up for so long come spilling out of her mouth. She was beyond caring what people thought of her, fuelled by the courage from the earlier alcohol and the riving anger she could no longer contain 'You never listen to me, ever, in case you haven't noticed I'm not you. I'm fed up of letting you walk all over me, telling me how to act and who to be friends with. I can make my own decisions'

Katie opened her mouth to interrupted by she wasn't allowed the time as Emily continued 'I kissed her okay and it wasn't disgusting it was incredible and it wasn't a one off Katie, I'm gay and I love her'

Stopping abruptly she realised what she had let slip and looked over to see the shocked expression spread across Naomi's face 'I…' she began but found herself cut off by her twin.

'You're gay?' she spat, horror evident in her eyes 'and you love…her?'

The anger was fading quickly replace now with a sense of fear and she watch her sister process everything, the rest of the group awkwardly watching unsure of what to do. She frantically racked her thoughts for a way to calm Katie until she saw a look of spite crossed the other girls features 'Do you love her?' came the question.

Emily looked anxiously between Naomi and Katie. She willed the blonde to say yes, to prove once and for all that she felt the same and that those nights spent together meant something to both of them and that she wanted Emily back.

'Why don't you just relax, it doesn't matter..' Effy said making her presence known for the first time. Normally she liked to observe people, but this was too much for her to simply stand back and watch 'She's your sister'

'Stay out of this Effy' Katie scoffed throwing an angry look her way before turned her attention away again 'well? Do you love her? We're all waiting…dyke'

Emily watched Naomi take a deep breath, but part of her knew what was coming as she saw the other girl glancing around her taking in the faces of her friends and numerous others who had become fascinated watching the argument play out. She watched Effy offer an encouraging nod and wished she could thank her; at least someone was rooting for them. Looking back to Naomi she tried to calm her nerves as she felt her heart hammering in her chest.

'No.'

The word was whispered so quietly Emily wouldn't have even been sure she'd heard it if it wasn't for the victorious look on her sisters face.

Tears sprung to hers as she looked at the blonde who stood staring at the ground unable to meet her gaze. Clenching her fists Emily turned away urging herself not to cry, she wouldn't allow Katie that, even as her breaths became erratic she shut her eyes to stop the pain from spilling out. It felt as through her heart had been ripped from her chest, humiliated in front of everyone by two people she though loved her, that were supposed to care for her. Grabbing the bottle of vodka from Freddie she hurled it at the floor and watched as it smashed into a thousand pieces between Katie and Naomi, before turning and running into the darkness.