Chapter one: the meadow

Renesmee pov:

I buried the back of my head deeper into Jacob's chest. The warm breeze blow between the autumn colored leaves; which somehow reminded me of my mother. During the spring she would constantly complain about how green it was in forks but around this time of year she seemed her happiest.

Jacob, one of the few people I knew in my life besides my family always seemed to make me feel safe. My mother said that we were liked joined at the hip. Everywhere I went we always seemed to bump into each other. It was like the universe was pulling us together, kinda like fate or destiny.

He wrapped his arms around me tighter.

"You know" he slightly whispered in my ear.

"Your birthday is coming up soon". I looked up at him; he had a devilish grin on his face.

"You're going to be what? Seven this year, kid"

My warm smile turned into an unhappy frown. I pushed myself way from his hot, muscular body.

"What's wrong"? He questioned as he tried to pull me closer. I wasn't a kid; in human years sure but in my own years I physically looked 17 and was mentally I was more developed then a thousand year old vampires; but of course Jake would think of me as a kid. I've known him since I was born. How could he look at me and not see sweet baby Nessie. I could just picture the image he had of me. Seven year old Ness walking around with a Justin Bieber T- shirt with some jeggings but I could forget the pink sparkly sketchers. To Jacob black I was nothing more then a child not the intelligent teenager I appear to be. My legs came up to my chest, and I buried my knees into my forehead. I could feel the depression hit my like a speeding car on a highway.

"Huh" I sighed knowing that J.B. would never feel the way that I do for him.

"Nessie, I'm sorry" he said in a low voice.

"I know that was a pretty jerky move on my part". I just kept my head down so he couldn't guess what I was thinking. I heard his clothes move over the grass, positioning himself in front of me.

"Please forgive me" he begged but I still couldn't face him knowing that when I did he would look start into my eyes and realize that my happiness was slowly dimming to a slight nothing.

I felt his arms wrap around me, hands pressing gently against my back. His forehead placed on top of my head. He was so close I could smell the intoxicating scent of his breath. I'm not going to lie; Jacob always made me question myself. I could never be sad for to long with Jake around.

"Forgive me" he pleaded once more, his voice almost cracking between the two words.

"Stupid wolf" I said under my breath. I lifted my head and stared at J.B.

"I can't blame you for-" I stopped myself before reveling too much.

I looked away but a few seconds later I felt Jacobs's warm finger underneath my chin; stirring my face back to his. We stared for a moment and I felt this heavy pain in my chest. Every time my heart moved it felt like a piece of it was breaking and stabbing into my soul. I wouldn't take it anymore. I could feel the pain turning into tears, preparing to run down my face.

"Stop it Jake" I smacked his hand away. Standing up I brushed leaves off the back of my jeans. I looked into the sun and tried to control the words that I was getting ready to say.

"It's not your fault; just take me home". My swiped across my face; Wiping off the one running tear, dragging down my cheek.

"If that's what you want" he said before shifting into a wolf. I ran my fingers through his soft russet brown fur before lifting myself up on top of his back. I pressed my left cheek against the back of his neck and whispered "I'm sorry J.B." He dashed off, the wind blow through my hair as my grip on Jacob started to soften up. My chest on his back; I could feel his heart pounding at the same rhythm as mine. Soothing my body completely till everything around me turned to a blur and started to faded.

Jacob pov:

I gentle placed her down on the grass as I ran away to shift. When I came back she was gone. What was her deal? Today was going so well, till she flipped out on me. I ran and shifted again, running home.

About time I arrived at home dad already had food laying out on the table. I just sat there staring at the food but I didn't touch it. I was still trying to figure Nessie out. Replaying everything that was said, trying to make since of her madness. Today was going to be the day that I was going to tell her about how I felt about her. Nothing went as plan. Sinking more in my chair.

" you ok"?

"what"?

"are you ok? You haven't touched the food. What's bothering you".

"nothing! I'm just tired and I'm not hungry. Nessie and I ate before I came home. " I lied, I didn't want him to think he was a bad cook.

"you sure"? I looked at him, he defiantly not convinced.

"yeah, I'm just going to go to bed"

I laid in bed and looked out the widow. I wonder what she's looking out when she does this. I've noticed her eyes always seem to find a window to glaze through. The stars twinkled in the darkness, it was beautiful, almost like staring into her eyes.

For years I protected from everything. I mean she was just as bad as her mother when she was human. Always finding trouble, but the worst part was she wasn't even aware that she was in trouble. I was there when she needed someone to talk to, or if she wanted me there after a bad dream. Being the only time I was allowed to hold her. Rubbing the blush from her cheeks as her laid there still.

That night I kept waking up wondering if she thought about me like I thought about her