A/N: This fic did not turn out the way that I had it planned in my head.
Originally, this was supposed to be based on the song "Apologies" by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals.
Somehow this turned a little darker than what I'm used to writing.
The rape and abuse aren't written in graphic detail, but it is a very important part of this fic.
I write Dean as an ass a lot, but he's a major dick in this fic.
I started writing this on Sunday and then I just couldn't stop.
I can't wait to hear all of your thoughts!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the wrestlers, they all belong to WWE. If I owned John or Seth, I'd never leave my apartment. I'd also find Dean and kick his ass!
Whenever You Call
"Johnny!" Seth shouts drunkenly.
It's 2:30 in the morning and Seth is perched on John's porch yelling for him. John rubs his eyes tiredly and rolls over to check and see if his lover, Cody is still sleeping. Cody is awake and he doesn't look happy. John is shirtless, but he puts on a pair of pajama pants so that he can go confront his ex. Cody puts on a pair of shorts and follows John outside. Seth narrows his eyes when he sees Cody.
"Stop yelling, Seth. You're going to wake my neighbors," John tells him.
"I just wanted to talk to you. You won't return any of my calls," Seth replies.
"So take the fucking hint and leave him alone!" Cody interjects.
"I wasn't talking to you, Cody! This has nothing to do with you," Seth argues.
"Like hell it doesn't!" Cody retorts.
Seth smirks. "You're just a poor imitation of me! He doesn't love you; he's only with you because I broke up with him."
"That's enough, Seth! You're drunk and you need to go home," John firmly instructs him.
"Fine," Seth replies as he starts walking away.
"Wait. Did you drive here?" John asks.
"Yeah, so what?" Seth responds.
John sighs. "I can't let him drive home because he's fucking hammered."
"He got here just fine," Cody points out.
John kisses Cody chastely. "I'm going to find a shirt and drive him home. I'll be back in like 20 minutes."
Seth gets into John's car and he smiles as he reminisces about all of the good times that were had in the vehicle. John's body is tense and his jaw is clenched tightly. Seth knows that John is pissed at him, but he just had to see him! John steals a glance at Seth and he notices a few dark purple, almost black bruises decorating the left side of his face. It's still dark outside, so John assumes that's why he didn't see the injuries when they were on his porch.
"What happened to your face?" John wants to know.
"I got into a one-sided fight with Dean," Seth reveals.
"How long has he been . . . " John trails off because he doesn't want to think about Seth being abused.
Seth shrugs. "I don't know. A few months maybe. It doesn't matter though. It's not like you care."
"That's not true and you know it, Seth. If I would have known that you were in trouble―"
Seth interrupts him. "You would have known if you weren't so focused on your little fuck buddy, Cody."
"Leave Cody out of this. I'm sorry that I've been avoiding you and that I didn't know you needed me," John sincerely apologizes.
"I miss you," Seth lets him know.
"Seth . . . " John warns.
"That's why he hit me. He overheard me telling Phil how much I still want you," Seth admits.
"You need to break up with Dean and distance yourself away from him," John advises.
"I can't. Although I don't love him, he loves me and I need to be loved," Seth explains.
John pulls into Seth's driveway. "He abuses you, that's not love."
"Either way, I'm not leaving him," Seth counters.
"Seth, please. I don't want to see you getting hurt," John begs.
Seth holds back tears. "You don't care about what happens to me anymore."
"Yes, I do," John confesses.
Seth looks into John's beautiful blue eyes and he can't stop his tears from falling. John's not sure what to do, but he just wants Seth to stop crying. He wraps his strong arms around Seth and envelops him in a supportive hug. Seth immediately relaxes into John's embrace. It's been so long since he's felt John like this and he doesn't want to let him go. John tries to pull away, but Seth holds on even tighter to him.
"Can you stay with me tonight? I don't want sex, I just want to feel close to you," Seth requests.
"You know that I can't," John says.
"It's because of him, right?" Seth guesses.
"Yes," John answers.
"Well, I'm sure that Cody is waiting for you, so why don't you go to him?" Seth snaps.
"Seth, wait―"
Seth hastily gets out of John's car and he makes sure to slam the door hard. John thinks about going after him, but he knows that it's not a good idea. Seth has always been a bit moody, but he's flat out unstable right now and John feels like he'll only make things worse. He lets out a deep breath as he drives back home. John takes off his clothes and he slips back into bed with Cody.
"Are you ok, baby?" Cody checks.
"Not really," John states.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Cody wonders.
John shakes his head. "No."
The next day, John is playing basketball with his best friend Randy and a few more of their friends. John is completely distracted through and everyone can tell that there's something wrong with him. Randy pulls him aside during a break because he wants to know what's plaguing John. Randy grabs a bottle of water for both of them and he finds a secluded bench in the park for them to sit on.
"What's up with you?" Randy asks.
"Did you know what was going on between Seth and Dean?" John wants to know.
"You mean the fact that Dean has made Seth his punching bag? Yeah, I'd heard rumors," Randy replies.
"Why didn't you tell me?" John yells.
"Hey, calm down. Seth isn't your problem anymore. You're finally in a relationship with a great guy that deserves you, so I wasn't going to burden you with your ex's problems," Randy remarks.
"You should have told me," John insists.
"Why? Seth is a big boy, he can fight his own battles," Randy mentions.
"No, he really can't," John says.
Randy sighs. "You're going to stress and agonize over him and this is exactly what I didn't want. He's not worth your time, John."
"I know that you hate him for breaking my heart, but even you have to realize that he doesn't deserve the treatment that he's receiving from Dean," John states.
"I never said that he deserved it. I'm just saying that it's not up to you to play Super Cena for him," Randy clarifies.
"He doesn't have anyone else," John explains.
"Maybe he shouldn't have turned his back on you and all of his friends," Randy retorts.
"I need to go check on him," John comments as he walks away.
Randy follows him. "John, don't."
"I have to," John tells him.
One Month Later
Despite Cody and Randy's advice, John has kept in close contact with Seth. Seth is still with Dean much to John's chagrin, but John is still trying to convince him to leave. John and Cody are currently cuddling in their bed while watching a movie. John reaches for the popcorn when he feels his phone vibrate. He notices that it's Seth calling him, so he decides to answer it. He says hello, but he only hears shallow breathing as a response.
"Seth?" John calls.
"Johnny . . . help," Seth whispers.
"Where are you?" John asks as he starts putting his shoes on.
"My house," Seth answers in a pained voice.
"Ok, I'll be there soon," John tells him before he hangs up.
"What's going on?" Cody questions.
"Something is wrong with Seth. I think that he's hurt," John explains.
"I'm coming with you," Cody announces.
"Ok, hurry up and get dressed then," John replies.
John drives a little faster than what's legal in order to get to Seth's house. He knows that something is amiss when he sees that Seth's front door is slightly ajar. John doesn't have to look hard for Seth because his injured body is left on the living room floor. There's blood everywhere and Seth's clothes are ripped to shreds. Cody gasps at the ghastly scene. John has to check and make sure that Seth is still breathing.
"Cody, go find him some clothes. Make it quick!" John directs.
Seth tries to open his mouth to say something, but John tells him to save his breath because his pulse is weak. Cody runs down the stairs with the clothes and he helps John gently maneuver Seth's body so that they can dress him. The ambulance is on their way and John really hopes that they hurry up. Seth flinches whenever the paramedics touch him, so John agrees to ride with them so that he can calm Seth down. Cody reluctantly drives John's car to the hospital and goes to the waiting room.
After hours of waiting, Seth's doctor finally comes out to inform John of his condition. There's barely any part of Seth that is left unharmed. When John walks into his room, he's shocked at the sight. Seth's whole body is practically bandaged. He can see that Seth has been crying and John's heart completely shatters. He sits by Seth's bed, opposite of where the IV pole is. He grabs Seth's hand and tenderly caresses it.
"What the fuck did he do to you?" John questions.
Seth wipes his tears. "He brought a few friends that I'm not familiar with over and they had their way with me. First, they just started beating me up. They kicked me, punched me, and one of them had a knife that he cut me with a few times. I thought that they were done, but then all 3 of them raped me repeatedly. I think I went numb about an hour into the attack."
"I am going to kill Dean!" John threatens.
"Promise me that you won't do anything in retaliation. Dean's dangerous and I couldn't live with myself if he hurt you," Seth comments.
"He can't get away with this, Seth," John tells him.
"I'm not worth the trouble that you'll get yourself into if you confront him," Seth responds.
"Don't talk like that," John softly chastises him.
"He told me that he was going to ruin me. That you would never want me after what he did to me," Seth reveals brokenly.
"Everything that he's ever told you is a lie, Seth. Every single word," John lets him know.
"But―"
John interrupts him. "Look, I'm going to go talk to Cody for a little bit. I'll be back, though. I promise that I'll only be gone for about 10 minutes.
"Ok," Seth says.
Before John talks to Cody, he decides to make a special phone call. Since Seth seems so distressed and worried about John getting hurt, John started formulating a plan. He calls Randy and after the phone rings for a while, he finally picks up. Randy says that he's busy and that he doesn't have a lot of time to talk. John only needs a few minutes to pitch his idea to Randy, so he starts talking.
"I need you to do me a favor," John requests.
"What is it?" Randy wonders.
"I need you to round up Stephen and Ryan and get some revenge for me," John explains.
"What kind of revenge? What happened?" Randy questions.
"To make a long story short, Seth is in the hospital because Dean and a few of his friends severely beat and raped him," John divulges.
"Holy shit! Is he ok?" Randy asks.
"No, he's a fucking mess. I'd hunt Dean down myself, but Seth begged me not to," John replies.
"We'll find him and take care of him," Randy guarantees.
"Thank you," John expresses his gratitude.
"No problem," Randy says.
"Absolutely not!" Cody screams.
"He was brutally attacked, Codes. He's scared, he's vulnerable, and he doesn't need to be left alone," John explains.
"You're trying to make me the bad guy because I don't want you spending the night with another guy," Cody argues.
"It's not like that, Cody. I just want to be here for him because he doesn't have anyone else," John continues.
"What about what I need? Things haven't been the same since you've let Seth back into your life. It's like I don't matter to you anymore," Cody declares.
"I love you and you know that you mean a lot to me," John assures him.
"It's not enough though. Because you're always going to run to him whenever he calls you," Cody points out.
"I―"
Cody cuts him off. "Look, it's late and I'm tired. Stay with him and we'll talk about this later."
"I'll call you in the morning," John tells him.
"You took longer than 10 minutes," Seth teases.
"I know. I'm sorry," John apologizes.
"It's fine. I'm just glad that you're back," Seth states.
"You don't have to worry about me leaving, I'm staying here with you," John lets him know.
"Good. I don't want to be alone," Seth says.
John grabs his hand. "I know."
"I didn't thank you for saving me, but I'm beyond grateful. I don't know what I'd do without you in my life," Seth remarks.
"Fortunately, I made it to you in time," John comments.
"You always do," Seth mentions.
John sighs. "You're so reckless, Seth. I'm afraid that it's going to get you killed one day. I can't always be there to save you."
"My rash behavior is the reason that I'm in this hospital bed right now. I have no desire to continue living like this," Seth replies.
"Good. I hate seeing you like this," John says.
Two Weeks Later
Seth is finally mostly recovered and released from the hospital. His emotional scars are nowhere near being healed and he's afraid to go back to his house. John has a guest room at his house, so he decides to let Seth stay there. Of course, he hasn't talked to Cody about this decision, so John is prepared for an argument. John gets Seth settled in the spare room before he goes to talk to his boyfriend.
"You treat him like a child. I can see why he left you," Cody points out.
"I do not treat him like a child," John argues.
"Whatever," Cody petulantly responds.
"You're obviously pissed about something. Just get it off of your chest," John encourages.
"How long until he moves into your bedroom?" Cody asks.
"What?" John replies.
Cody takes a deep breath. "I finally figured you out. You have this Superhero complex where you feel like you have to save people. The minute that Seth needs you for something, you'll be there like his knight in shining armor. I love you and I want you, but I don't need you. Seth needs you and because of that, you need him too. There's no room for me in your life anymore."
"A-Are you breaking up with me?" John questions.
"Yes. There's a damaged soul in your guest room right now and you're compelled to mend him. Just don't smother him too much or you'll lose him again," Cody advises.
John wipes a tear from his eye. "I love you, Cody."
"I know you do, John. You have such a kind and loving heart. You're the type that will fall in love again and again. But you're always going to be stuck in this vicious cycle with Seth," Cody tells him sadly.
"I hear him calling me. I have to go check on him," John comments.
"Of course you do," Cody mutters under his breath.
A few days have passed and Cody has moved his things out of John's house. Seth is spending his first night in John's bedroom. They're watching a movie and Seth makes sure to stay on the other side of the bed. He wants to be closer to John, but he's not sure if John wants the same thing. John's hand accidentally grazes Seth's thigh as he reaches for the popcorn. Seth lets out a small moan at the brief contact and he scoots over even further.
"It looks like you're going to fall off of the bed. Why are you all the way over there?" John asks.
"I wasn't sure if you would be comfortable laying near me," Seth explains quietly.
John pulls Seth closer. "I'm just fine being close to you."
"Johnny, I'm sorry about all of the things that I said when I left you," Seth apologizes.
"I understood where you were coming from. You were young and you weren't ready to settle down with me. My lifestyle seemed boring and unattractive to you. I came on a bit strong," John states.
Seth looks John right in the eyes. "Sometimes, your love was like a blanket. It got too hot and I had to come up for air. Of course, I had no idea that I would fucking freeze while I was with Dean. I was so stupid for walking away from you. I really didn't realize how amazing you were until I left. I hope that you can forgive me."
"I forgive you, Seth," John tells him earnestly.
"I'm really fucked up right now. I'm just now realizing how much Dean poisoned me with his words and his actions. He broke me; he crushed my spirit and stole my confidence. I know that I'm not an easy fix, but I hope that you can still find it in your heart to love me . . . " Seth trails off as a tear falls.
"You're bruised, Seth, you're not broken. I'm going to do whatever it takes to help you recover. I don't care how damaged that you are, I'll always love you. Dean probably thinks that he took everything away from you, but he didn't. I'm right here and I'll be here for you every step of the way," John assures him.
John softly wipes Seth's tears away. He delicately places his large hand on Seth's cheek and gently caresses it. Seth hums in contentment at John's tender touch. John tilts Seth's chin up so that they're facing each other and he very slowly brings their lips together. He checks for any hesitation from Seth and when he doesn't find any, he deepens the kiss. They both moan into each other's mouths. Seth pulls away from the kiss first, but he has a smile on his face.
"I love you," Seth comments.
"I love you too," John repeats.
Seth wants to cook John a nice dinner, so they're currently at the grocery store. Seth is in the produce section because he prefers to cook with fresh vegetables instead of frozen ones. John is a few aisles away picking out what kind of pasta that he wants. Seth is bagging up the onions and putting them in his cart when he feels a pair of strong, familiar arms wrap around his waist. Seth stiffens and tries not to panic. Dean slips one of his hands under Seth's shirt and starts caressing the soft skin of his stomach.
"You clean up nicely, slut. There's barely a scratch on you. I guess my boys and I didn't rough you up enough," Dean taunts.
"Leave me alone!" Seth demands.
"Or what?" Dean challenges.
"Or you'll have to deal with me," John says, suddenly behind Dean.
Dean steps back from Seth and turns toward John. "Oh, please. I'm not scared of you, Cena."
"You should be, though. If you think what my friends did to you was bad, it's nothing compared to how much I'll hurt you," John threatens.
"Is that a threat?" Dean questions.
"No, it's a promise if you ever bother Seth again. When I'm done with you, they'll need dental records to identify your body," John guarantees.
Dean grins. "You know, Seth screams so beautifully. He was practically choking on his own blood as he begged me to stop hurting him. I got so hard as I fucked his nearly lifeless body. Every time I thrust into him, he would bleed so perfectly―"
Dean doesn't finish his sentence because John suddenly punches him right in the mouth. The force of the punch makes Dean fall on his ass. John reaches for him so that he can hit him again, but Seth grabs John's arm to stop him. Seth has to use all of his strength to John away from Dean. John is vibrating with rage, but Seth tries his best to calm him down. Seth knows if he wouldn't have dragged John away, that John would probably be in jail. John is still seething when they make it back to his house.
"I could fucking kill that sick son of a bitch!" John yells.
"As appealing as that sounds, it's not worth you getting arrested," Seth reasons.
"You're wrong, it definitely would have been worth it," John argues.
"I can't believe that he touched me! After what he did to me . . . " Seth trails off.
Seth can still feel where Dean touched him earlier. Seth feels sick, dirty, and absolutely disgusted with himself. He rushes upstairs to the bathroom. He turns the water on and he waits for it to heat up. He practically rips his shirt off and grabs his wash cloth. Once the water is the right temperature, he puts some soap on the cloth and starts washing his stomach. He's washing so hard that his skin is turning red and it's starting to become painful. John enters the bathroom and removes the wash cloth from Seth's hands.
"Stop! You're going to rub yourself raw," John warns.
"I can still feel him! I just want it to go away," Seth sobs into John's arms.
"I'll make it go away," John promises.
John walks Seth to his room and lays him down on the bed. Seth is still crying and his body starts shaking from anxiety. John bends down to kiss Seth's stomach and he immediately relaxes. Seth asks him to kiss that spot again. John obeys and Seth closes his eyes. John's motions are light and loving, the complete opposite of Dean. John continues to shower Seth's stomach with kisses until Seth tells him to stop.
"Johnny, please make love to me," Seth requests.
"Are you sure?" John checks.
"Yes. I need it. I need you," Seth desperately comments.
John gives Seth a sweet kiss and he breaks away so that he can take his shirt off. They're both shirtless and Seth loves the skin-to-skin contact. John slowly licks Seth's neck and he takes his time making his way down Seth's body. Seth shivers pleasurably when John sticks his tongue into his belly button. That particularly spot has always been an erogenous zone for Seth and he's surprised that John remembers.
"You remembered," Seth whispers.
"I remember everything that you like," John retorts.
Seth lifts his hips up so that John can pull his sweats off easier. Seth isn't wearing anything underneath so he's completely nude. John hasn't seen Seth's body in a while, so he just admires how much Seth has changed and transformed. Seth was a 21 year old beanpole when they met and now his abs are defined and he's even more beautiful. Before John can make a move, Seth places his hand on John's belt buckle. He removes John's belt and unbuttons his jeans. He slides down John's jeans and boxers, so now they're both nude.
"You're fucking perfect. I don't know how I didn't see it before," Seth comments.
John kisses Seth chastely. "It's ok. You've always been gorgeous to me."
Seth blushes at John's praise. Seth has definitely missed John's kindness. John runs his hands down Seth's smooth abs and he pauses before he gets to Seth's cock. Seth is hard and already dripping pre-cum. John gathers some of the clear fluid in his hand so that he can use it as lube. He makes a fist and slowly pumps Seth's dick up and down. Seth moans at the hot, sweet feeling. He hasn't felt pleasure in so long, so Seth knows that he'll reach his end soon.
"I don't want to cum yet. I want to wait until you're inside me," Seth requests.
John stops stroking Seth's cock and Seth lets out a deep breath. Seth knows that John would never hurt him, but he's still feeling a little bit of fear. John spreads Seth's legs and he can feel that Seth is tense. He caresses Seth's parted thighs and he eventually relaxes. John's hand is still damp, but he still feels the need to fetch his lube. He searches Seth's pretty brown eyes for any signs of reluctance.
"I'm ready," Seth lets John know.
"You're sure?" John asks.
"Yes, I'm 100% positive," Seth answers confidently.
John adds a drop of lube to one of his fingers and he aims for Seth's prostate immediately. Seth arches his back from the sudden pleasure. John wants to make sure Seth is stretched, but he doesn't want him to feel any pain. He watches Seth's facial expressions thoroughly as he adds another finger to the mix. Seth is feeling slight discomfort, but it's nothing that he can't handle. John slides one more finger inside and he makes sure that he keeps hitting that spot inside Seth. After a few short minutes, Seth feels the wonderful tingling sensation throughout his whole body.
"Your fingers are extremely talented, but I want your cock now," Seth demands in a sexy tone.
John opens the condom with his teeth and puts it on quickly. He positions himself between Seth's legs and he slowly inches his way inside. John pauses once he's completely inside and Seth is grateful for the time to adjust to John's girth. Seth drapes his arms around John's neck and brings their bodies a little closer together. He nods slowly, letting John know that he can move.
"You have to tell me if I hurt you," John warns.
"I will," Seth agrees.
John pulls out leisurely and slowly plunges back inside. Seth groans in utter ecstasy. John keeps up his unhurried pace and Seth loves it because he can feel all of John when he thrusts. John is feeling absolute bliss; Seth is perfectly warm and tight. He bends down to lick Seth's sweaty neck and Seth shivers. One of John's hands pinches Seth's nipple while he speeds up just a little bit. Seth is almost dizzy from all of the gratifying sensations.
"You can go a little faster," Seth lets him know.
John shakes his head. "I don't want to hurt you."
"You won't," Seth assures him.
John wants to argue, but his willingness to please Seth takes over. John is enjoying himself, but he only cares about bringing Seth pleasure. He quickens his tempo and Seth grunts because his cock is experiencing more stimulation as it's trapped between their stomachs. The complete look of enjoyment on Seth's face warms John's heart. He changes his angle so that he's now stroking Seth's prostate.
"Fuck, Johnny!" Seth exclaims.
Seth can feel pleasure throughout his whole body. He digs his nails into John's neck because the ecstasy is almost too much for him. John knows that Seth will reach his peak soon, so he slows down a little bit just to draw out the sensation. Seth is stuck at the plateau right before orgasm and it's a unique sensation that he's never felt before. It's both satisfying and frustrating at the same time. It feels like he's suspended in mid-air getting ready to fall, but he hasn't yet started falling.
"So good," Seth moans.
After teasing Seth for a few more moments, John decides to reward him. He rubs against Seth's prostate deliberately and Seth's body gets rocked by a powerful orgasm. Seth's hair is all over the place and he's panting by the time that he's done. John cums unexpectedly at seeing Seth come undone. He rolls over, so that he doesn't rest his full body weight on Seth. After both men catch their breath, Seth captures John's lips in a slow, sensual, and ardent kiss.
"You always give me what I need. Thank you," Seth tells him.
John kisses him sweetly. "And I'll continue to do that for as long as I live."
"I love you," Seth expresses.
"I love you too," John responds.
"I'm never leaving you again. I realize now that you're everything that I could ever want and need," Seth remarks.
"You're mine now, Seth. I lost you once and it's never going to happen again," John replies.
A/N: Although he was only mentioned briefly, I just realized this is my first fic where Ryback makes an appearance.
The line about John's love being like a blanket is based on my favorite lyrics in "Apologies" by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals.
I had a lot of fun writing this, I just can't get enough of writing John and Seth together!
I didn't go into much detail about John and Seth's relationship before the breakup, so I'm thinking about writing a prequel.
What do you think?