It's my first time…so please give me advises cause it's better to be criticized by other people
It's my second new fanfic… please give me some advises if possible cause it's better to be criticized by other people. Thank you!!
Let's start the story when they were in shipudden(sp?), but I won't refer it to the series okay? By the way,I have my Original Character…Well, I hope you like it!
-means what the character is thinking
( )-means me explaining or showing expressions
Your name is Uchiha Bei (means sorrowful in chinese-just an added info)
One of the survivors of the Uchiha Clan.(me: maybe you're wondering how it happened, you'll know as the story goes) You're already 15 same as the main characters. You have a straight black hair and dull black eyes having a nice form of body.
Okay,let's start!
You (Bei) were walking in Konoha Village, searching for Tsunade's(sp?) office. As you passed by, a boy with yellow messy hair and blue eyes asked you …
"Hey! Are you new here? Do you need my help?"said the Blue eyed boy smiling at you.
Ah…uhuh…I was wondering were Tsunade-sama's office located
AH! Grandma!? I'll show you the way. By the way, I'm Uzomaki Naruto(offering his hand)
"Thank You! I'm Bei…UCHIHA BEI" you smiled as you offered your hand.
As Bei looked at Naruto, she bacame quite confused through his eyes because he's staring at you intently…
Naruto's eyes grew big and stares at you…
Whaaat!? Is something wrong Naruto? Oi! NA-RU-TO……
Bei felt kind of uneasy through Naruto's looks because of the feeling that he doesn't believe you and became a bit suspicious about you .
uh…um…mmm….UCHIHA?? Oo (shocked) Naruto, being shocked about the thing "UCHIHA" as your surname made him stop talking and cannot say anything.
Suddenly,a boy with black hair came, followed by a girl with a short pink hair
Oi Naruto! As the Boy w/ black hair shouted.Why are you yelling my name? he asked annoyed and looked you I have a bad feeling about this girl
yah!what are you doing here anyway Naruto? Tsunade-sama is searching for you said the Girl w/ pink hair (She noticed you and asked…) Uh…Naruto,who is she? you're not supposed to be near with my Sasuke!
Naruto: She's the answer for all of your questions!?
You: Huh!? Why me?
Boy w/ black hair: We're asking you "Who is she?"(stares at you)
Girl w/ pink hair: Why is Sasuke looking at her! Back to her reality-Ah, pardon me, I'm Sakura. Haruno Sakura(offering her hand but looking at you straight to the eyes) and he is Sasuke
Sasuke: (nodded) and repeated Uchiha Sasuke there's something fishy about her
You offered your hand to Sakura even though you felt a dark aura from her and greeted them both especially Sasuke because you realized that you're related.
You: It's alright, I should've introduced myself first. I'm Bei…Uchiha Bei, nice to meet you two!smiled sweetly(You noticed that they reacted as you can see their expressions towards you,especially Sasuke but you ignored it) Hope that we get along, especially you Sasuke. We're kinda related,right?
Naruto: I told YOU………….
Sasuke: Come with me !(he quickly grabs your arm)
You: Ha? Wait! Why are you in a hurry!? Calm down please! what's wrong with him? He NOT listening to me now…
Sasuke: We need to TALK especially to Tsunade-sama(he drags you with him)
"WAIT you two!!" Naruto and Sakura yelled.
Naruto: This is going to be messy…
Sakura: I hope NOT, but I can't blame Sasuke. Suddenly knowing this situation would really pressure him at this state Is SHE an UCHIHA!?(worried)
As Sasuke grabs and drags you, you struggled but Sasuke didn't let go, leaving Naruto and Sakura behind. You realized that there's a big problem why he reacted like that so…
You: Wait for a Sec!!You're hurting me!! (you remove your arm from him) I'm getting irritated!!
Sasuke: Ah…I'm sorry,I was so shocked that there's still an Uchiha excluding me and…
You: (you cut him by telling) That's not a problem... SIGH Just imagine me being dragged by you? I can walk by myself you know!! GGGRRRRR!!
Sasuke: I told you I didn't mean it!! HN! Let's stop this and go to Tsunade-sama's office
You: (you shrugged) whatever… TT
You two are now in the building and as Sasuke knocked…He opened the door and……Sorry needed to end here!! Hope that you'll rate and give criticisms.Thanks for reading!