Chapter 1: A Raft of Things

Tom Sloane checked his phone and the display showed him that he had only about 20 minutes to get to Daria's apartment. He was nearly running from the arrival platform to the 'T' – Boston's subway. The train from Newtowne had arrived late. He had called Daria and she told him to get there as fast as possible. She had to report with her cap and gown for commencement at 9:30 am. That meant that she and her parents needed to leave the apartment at 9:00 am in order to be certain to have enough time to walk to the arena.

Fortunately, by now Tom was quite experienced using Boston's subway system. He even kept a ticket with him that had enough value to get him to the station near Daria's apartment. As he reached the platform a train arrived and he jumped on board. Tom counted himself lucky to get a train so quickly on a Saturday morning. Looking again at the display on the cover of his phone for the time, he realized that he would arrive at the station with about 3 minutes to get to Daria's apartment. His phone also showed him that there was no service on the subway. He decided to call Daria as soon as he was once again above ground.

As Tom was going as fast as he could to reach her, Daria was being checked out by her mother, Helen, and sister Quinn. Quinn was fussing with Daria's auburn hair and her mortarboard. Looking in the mirror and working from the back she was trying to get Daria's hair just right to complement her oval face. It actually helped that at 5 feet 3 inches (160 cm) Daria was actually 2 inches (5 cm) shorter than her younger sister.

"You really look good in your cap and gown, Daria!" Helen Morgendorffer said to her eldest daughter.

"Thanks Mom," Daria replied in her total deadpan.

Quinn, ever the fashion maven, chimed in with, "The little hood makes the outfit cute. The white stripe makes it really stand out." With a note of sadness in her voice Quinn went on to say, "State doesn't give out cute little hoods."

Slightly irritated, Daria retorted in total deadpan, "Quinn, first of all this is not meant to be cute. It is a medieval uniform, which has been standardized for today by a committee. For example, my hood is exactly 3 feet (91 cm) long, because I am getting a bachelor's degree. Second, large public universities don't usually use the bachelor's hood. Third, the white on the hood signifies arts and letters – since my degree is in English."

Unfazed by Daria's correction, Quinn went on, "OK. What are you going to write on top of your mortarboard? You've got to have something up there! Many of my friends put their sorority or fraternity letters on there. But, you are not in a sorority, so you need to think of something else!"

Again in total deadpan Daria quipped, "They probably wouldn't let me in if I put something like 'Go to Hell' on it."

"Daria!" Helen and Quinn said loudly in unison.

Hearing the commotion Jake Morgendorffer opened the door to the bedroom, looked in and said. "Is everything alright in here?"

Exasperated Helen replied, "Everything is fine Jake. Go back to reading the paper. We will let you know when we are ready to go."

Quinn again said to Daria, "You need to write something."

"Alright," Daria said. "Get me some white adhesive tape. I will write 'Excelsior' on my mortarboard."

Quinn gave her sister a quizzical look and asked, "Why that?"

Daria replied, "Since I am planning to move to New York City, I will emblazon my mortarboard with the state motto of New York. It means 'ever upward' in Latin. It probably refers to taxes."

Handing her the tape Quinn remarked, "You're weird Daria."

"Think of it as part of my charm. It is why Tom loves me."

"You're still weird."

Helen jumped in with, "Stop it, girls. Daria, finish your mortarboard quickly so that we can get going."

Daria quickly formed the letters with the adhesive tape and then gathered her things. She walked out of her bedroom into the living room where her father was ready with a camera. He snapped a couple of pictures inside the apartment and then they went outside and snapped a few more.

Tom came running up a bit out of breath just as they finished with the pictures. Looking at the Morgendorffers he apologized, "Sorry I'm late, but the train was late getting into the station."

Helen looked at her watch and stated, "We have to go right now." The family plus Tom started walking quickly toward the arena.

As they walked Tom turned to Daria and asked, "So what is the story with 'Excelsior' written in adhesive tape on your mortarboard?"

Daria replied, "I'll tell you later. Meanwhile, more walking and less talking. We have to get there!"

Arriving with just 3 minutes to spare, Daria saw her longtime best friend Jane Lane standing outside the arena. Jane's lean frame, heart shaped face and black, chop cut hair were a dead giveaway at a distance. She was talking to Helen's sister, Amy Barksdale, who likewise was easily recognizable. Though somewhat taller than Daria, Amy shared the same oval face and auburn hair. "Thanks for coming, Jane, Aunt Amy," Daria said a little bit out of breath. "We'll talk afterward. I have to run." Daria gave Tom a quick kiss and said, "By the way, hi to you too." Turning on her heel she parted company with the others and headed toward the staging area to line up for the processional. Tom, Jane, Amy, and the Morgendorffers went into the arena to locate seats. Jake sat next to Helen. Quinn sat between Helen and Tom and Jane sat next to Tom. Amy took the end next to Jane.

As they sat down Quinn remarked, "Gee, from up here Daria will be just a little blob!"

Jake added, "None of the seats in here are all that close. Maybe we should have brought a couple sets of binoculars."

"It'll be fine, Jake," Helen said with a distinct note of exasperation. "I think we will be able to see her from here."

Tom didn't say anything. He just made himself as comfortable as possible in the hard plastic arena seats and hoped that he wouldn't fall asleep during one of the deathly dull speeches.

Amy turned to Jane and said, "Hopefully the commencement speakers know that the mind will only absorb what the seat can endure!"

Jane turned to her and replied, "You aren't kidding! At any concert or sports event in this place people must be on their feet not to cheer but to avoid sitting on the seats."

After what seemed like an endless wait, but was actually less than 30 minutes, the Raft Chamber Orchestra began playing the strains of Elgar's "Pomp and Circumstance." The sounds rose above the din of the gathered crowd. The graduates started processing into the arena led by those receiving doctoral degrees, then those receiving master's degrees, and finally those receiving bachelor's degrees.

As everyone was looking at the main floor Quinn blurted, "Look there's Daria. She is just starting up the center aisle now! She's in the left line."

Helen said, "Watch which row she goes into. Count the number of rows from the front so that we can predict when she will go up."

After about two minutes Jake piped up with, "I count it as Row 20 on the left side. That is just over half way back. With about 10 rows for the faculty she should be somewhere around number 500."

Once the soon-to-be graduates had processed into the arena the faculty began their procession. Finally the dais party entered with the president and graduation speaker bringing up the rear.

Jane leaned over and whispered in Tom's ear. Both Tom and Jane were chuckling.

Quinn leaned over and whispered to him, "What's so funny Tom?"

Tom whispered back, "Jane was wondering, given the possible length of the commencement, how many people on the floor and the dais are wearing adult diapers. I was just thinking about how as the newly graduated shake hands the people whose hands they shake might be making crinkling noises. At least the robes are so full that no one will ever be able to tell if one of the diapers expanded due to use!"

Quinn responded again in a whisper, "Eeew! But you really have a point. Again eeew! Tom, you realize that now I can't get that image out of my mind! It's like one of those songs that gets stuck in your head."

Tom leaned back to Jane and told her what Quinn had said. They both chuckled again.

Amy leaned over and said, "Well, it is better than the image of a pool at their feet!"

Quinn said, "Again! Eeew!"

Tom said to Quinn, "Next year it's your turn!"

Helen said with a definite tone of resignation, "Well, this will certainly become a long afternoon."

Everyone was finally in position and the music ended. The ceremony was opened and one by one the speakers came to the microphone. After about an hour the graduates started to process across the dais.

It took more than another hour before they heard, "Daria Morgendorffer, Summa Cum Laude, Outstanding English Student." They saw Daria walk across the dais, shake hands with the President of Raft, turn, go down three steps, stop to have her picture taken, and return to her seat. With that four years of college came to an end.

After seeing her eldest daughter return to her seat Helen remarked, "Well thank God they at least pronounced her name right."

Tom said, "I knew she was concerned about that. I knew that she was going to graduate with highest honors, but she didn't tell me about the award as Outstanding English Student!"

Jane added, "Yeah. The little stinker didn't even tell me!"

Quinn turned and said in her best imitation of Daria's deadpan, "You know Daria. She's always talking up her achievements!"

Amy added, "She did tell me. She was awarded the honor for both the quality of her academic work and some of the things she did on the literary magazine. Believe it or not Daria actually got involved in something! Of course she did a great job."

Jake said, "I for one need to use the men's room. Would you let me out? Thanks." Jake made his way over Helen, Quinn, Tom, Jane, and Amy to the aisle. Then he disappeared heading for the corridor. Tom got up and followed him.

As Tom exited the men's room Jake was waiting for him.

"Tom, can you join me over here?" Jake asked.

"Sure," Tom replied as Jake led them to an alcove under some of the seats.

Jake leaned over to Tom and said, "So, Tom. I was just wondering what was next for your two. Since you and Daria got back together last summer things have been, er. What I want to say is that you two have spent a lot of time together. Um."

Tom said with a mock note of surprise, "Why Mr. Morgendorffer, are you asking me about my intentions toward your daughter?"

Wringing his hands and looking at the floor Jake answered, "Yes. That is what I am asking. What comes next? Daria rarely volunteers information. Beyond going to your graduation next week I really don't know what is going on." Looking Tom in the eye Jake pleaded, "What is going on?"

Tom sighed and responded to Jake, "Well, first I will tell you what is happening and then I will let you know about my intentions. How's that?"

"Fair enough."

"Daria is going to send most of her things back to Lawndale with you. Then she will check out of her apartment on Wednesday and come down to Newtowne for my graduation next weekend. Our plans are that she will stay on in Newtowne with me afterward while responding to job opportunities in New York. My lease runs until the end of June. She has an interview in New York coming up and so do I. If everything works out, then I expect we will both move to New York by the end of June. That is about as far in the future we can see. There is just not a great level of certainty about events in the future, so far. That should change once we get jobs."

"And your intentions?"

"First of all, if you mean are we going to live together in New York, then the answer is – no. Daria and I have already had this discussion and there are some things that she wants to prove to herself. She says she can't do that if we are living together. It hurts, but I learned long ago that when she has her mind so dead set on something I simply have to go along for the ride."

"Well, that's Daria. I learned that long ago as well. So, if something is first then what is second."

"Second, I will tell you that I am in love with Daria. When she broke up with me at the end of high school it nearly tore my heart out of my chest. I have spent years carefully cultivating our relationship leading up to getting back together last August. Daria has told me that she loves me, too. This is no hook-up or casual affair. I can't say exactly where we are going, but my intention is to ask her to marry me when the time is right. But as you know with Daria the time has to be right for her. In the meantime I am working hard to build our relationship 'brick by brick.' It is not easy, but it is worth doing for the love of my life."

"Wow," was all Jake could say.

"Now," Tom said in a very serious tone. "You need to give me your word that you will not tell anyone other than Helen about this. I especially don't want Quinn blabbing things to Daria. You and Helen need to keep our conversation here under wraps. Daria has let me past her formidable defenses, but that does not mean that she couldn't be spooked and back off. I believe that our future is together. My job now is to convince Daria of that on both a rational and an emotional level."

"You've thought this out. That is good. Helen and I would have been much better off over the years if we were better planners."

"As Daria would say, 'You can be so boring Mr. Accountant' or something like that," Tom said imitating Daria's deadpan delivery.

Jake chuckled and said, "Yeah Tom. I can see her saying something like that. Now you just need to have a good comeback."

The two men laughed together and headed back to their seats.

…

With all of the nearby restaurants crammed with diners following Raft's graduation ceremony the Morgendorffers had decided to have their celebratory dinner back at Daria's apartment. With her roommates gone there was enough room for the six of them and the place had a full kitchen. Jake and Helen had brought a card table and extra chairs with them to effectively extend the seating at the kitchen table.

If there was one thing Daria had learned in college it was how to effectively use her microwave and crock pot. She had her parents bring their extra-large crock pot from home. She had even gone out last week and purchased an additional extra-large crock pot just for this occasion. Before getting dressed for graduation, Daria had started two chickens cooking. She used her long serving smaller crock pot to cook potatoes for potatoes au gratin.

The group was barely in the door before Daria started issuing orders. "Tom, you are on vegetables. The green beans, mushrooms, and wine are in the fridge. Quinn, I need you to finish the potatoes. Tom knows where I keep the pans. Aunt Amy you are on salad. Everything is in the salad drawer in the fridge. Dressings are on the door. Dad, you set up the card table and get the chairs arranged. Mom, you get the table set. Tom can show you where I keep the plates and silverware. Jane, you are with me to help me change." With that she pulled Jane into her bedroom and shut the door.

As quickly as she could Daria closed the door to her room. Jane was standing right by her. Daria turned and put her arms around Jane, buried her head in Jane's shoulder, and began to sob.

Jane was totally taken by surprise. Not knowing what else to do, she hugged her best friend and just held her as she cried. In the 7 years or so that they had known each other there was only one other time that Jane had known Daria to cry. Not really knowing what else to say, Jane said softly, "It's OK Daria. Everything will be OK. Everyone here loves you. You will be fine." Jane rubbed Daria's back as she cried.

Daria whispered in her friend's ear, "I feel so stupid." Then she went back to dampening Jane's shoulder with her tears.

As her tears finally began to subside, Jane said quietly to Daria, "See? You're fine. Now do you want to tell me what this is about?"

"It's stupid and irrational." Daria said.

Jane responded, "I've told you before that you are human. You are entitled to be irrational sometimes. However, I know you well enough that 'stupid' is never an adjective that applies to you. So, out with it Morgendorffer! What is the matter?"

"I'm overwhelmed and scared. I shouldn't be either. This is the natural progression of things. But the upcoming interview, this whole graduation weekend, moving out, moving in with Tom – even just as temporary housing – and expectations from outsiders that because I majored in English I will be a failure and asking people 'Do you want fries with that?' or some such thing. What if they are right? Have I wasted four years of my life?"

"So," Jane observed. "To paraphrase Lucy Van Pelt, you have a fear of everything!"

"That's it!" Daria replied as she gestured with the first finger of her right hand. The 'Peanuts' reference was not lost on Daria.

"Look, Daria. We both knew what we were getting into when we chose our majors. Art is difficult to do for a living – particularly when it is one's own art. English is tough, too. But look at what you have ahead of you! You have a network of people who have helped you to get this upcoming interview. They are helping you because they recognize your talent. You are not getting this because of your looks or your sparkly personality."

"Gee, thanks Jane," Daria deadpanned.

"What I am saying is that you are getting this help on your merits. You are an intelligent woman, Daria. Your personality is what it is. Both Tom and I love you for your personality as well as your other traits. You are pretty, too. Don't sell yourself short."

"So now I'm short, too," Daria remarked.

"You know what I mean. You are walking on a road, but you are not walking alone. All you have to do is look around and see that there are others helping you get down that road. I get overwhelmed. There are times I feel overwhelmed and alone, too. But all I have to do is look around and see the people who are with me – and that includes you. Goodness knows that you have even more people with you than I do. You have a functional family! Heck, even a dysfunctional family is better than mine. Oh, and you have Tom. That guy is so in love with you that he would disembowel himself in front of you if that would make you happy."

"That's a lovely picture," Daria deadpanned.

"Again, you know what I mean. So, you are entitled to have emotions, Daria. As you oldest friend I am happy to support you."

"What about us Jane?" Daria asked with a certain note of pleading in her voice.

"What do you mean?" Jane asked.

"I'm going away, Jane. Since high school we have never been away from each other for more than my first semester here at Raft. I can't tell you how happy I was when you started at Boston Fine Arts College in the second semester. Having you nearby has been one of the few true joys in my life. I don't know what I will do without my best friend." Daria began to tear up again.

Jane again hugged Daria to herself. Then in a reassuring voice told Daria, "Look, we talk on the phone every couple of days now. That doesn't have to change. As an artist I have good reason to go to New York periodically. We can get together then. You know we'll have a good time then. Besides, once you are working it is not like you would have the time to just hang out the way we have been able to while in college. So, even if you were still here in Boston things would change. But just because things change doesn't mean that we won't remain just as close."

Jane released Daria and Daria stepped back a couple of steps. She reached over, grabbed a couple of tissues from a box lying on her nightstand and began to dry her eyes. "Thanks Jane. I feel somewhat better now."

"Good. Now let's get you out of your medieval garb and then we can help get dinner on the table."

While Daria and Jane were talking in the bedroom, things were progressing in the rest of the apartment – especially as Helen tried to take charge.

Helen said, "Jake, put the card table on this end of the kitchen table. Don't set the chairs so that people's knees are banging together! Where are the tablecloths? We don't want to be eating on bare tabletops! Amy. Be sure to mix that salad thoroughly! Tom, don't overcook the vegetables,"

Amy stopped and looked at her sister. "Helen," Amy said with a note of exasperation in her voice, "Truly you can relax. This doesn't have to be perfect and Tom is doing a great job sautéing the vegetables. I think the man knows how to cook. Please try not to be a control freak today for Daria's sake, OK?"

"I am not a control freak, Amy. I just want to make certain that things are done right."

Jake suddenly had a coughing fit. Unfortunately for him there was no escaping this.

Amy went on, "Just focus on getting the table set, Helen. Let the rest of us do our jobs. Daria made the assignments and it is her place. Respect her decisions and don't act like you are the foreman."

"Really, Amy. You are blowing this up way too much. I just want us to coordinate."

"So coordinate getting the tablecloths on and the place settings out onto the table. Tom and I can handle our jobs."

By the time this interchange was over Jake had the card table set up and all of the chairs arranged. Helen told him to quickly get the tablecloths and he quickly complied. After a good 30 plus years with Helen he knew darn well when to simply comply and not say anything.

Daria and Jane came out of the bedroom to see Tom placing vegetables in a serving bowl and Amy setting the bowl of salad on the table, which was all set for dinner. Jake had gone ahead and pulled the chickens out of the crock pot and was ready to cut them. Quinn was just pulling the potatoes out of the oven, where she had browned the cheese on top. It was only a few more minutes before everyone was seated and pouring wine in their glasses.

After everyone had wine, Tom lifted his glass and announced, "A toast to Daria. Congratulations on your graduation with highest honors and recognition as the outstanding English student. May you change our world for the better!"

Everyone aid, "Here, here," and touched their glasses to each other.

Jake also felt the need for a toast. "Here is to Daria. We are proud of you. You are a wonderful daughter!"

The others added, "Niece, sister, friend, and girlfriend," before again touching their glasses and drinking.

Daria sat there looking at all of this. Her face had her usual neutral expression, except that she was blushing. At the end she did smile and say, "Thank you. Now let's eat!" Then everyone began passing the food around the table.

As they were eating, Amy asked Daria and Tom, "So, tell me all about this interview coming up in New York!"

Daria started out saying, "Well, mine is with Sick Sad World. One of our alumni works for them and I got the contact through him. It will be a multi-day thing that includes trying to do some writing for the show."

Tom popped up with, "Not to mention you are one of five finalist candidates after a national contest seeking new writing talent for the show!"

"Yeah, that too," Daria said.

Amy responded with, "That is amazing, Daria. I have always been confident in your writing ability, but to put it to the test like that and becoming a finalist is truly an accomplishment."

"You didn't tell us about the contest kiddo!" Jake exclaimed.

Daria deadpanned, "Not much to say really until I became a finalist. It was sort of like casting water into the sea. I figured that the chances were small that I would even hear back from them."

Amy interjected, "The main thing is that you put yourself out there, Daria. You've now demonstrated that your writing is competitive on a national scale. And that is right out of college!"

Daria responded, "Maybe, but I think they are looking for entry level people because we are cheap. I am holding no illusions about salary or anything else related to this job."

Amy said, "Let me ask around and see what I can find out from my contacts. I know people in the industry, in particular people who have written books about it. I may be able to come up with some insights for you."

"Thanks Aunt Amy," Daria said.

Quinn popped up with, "You know, Daria, that whole interview story could be really exciting, but you make it sound so dull. You really need to rethink how you present it to people. I'll bet if you approached it like one of your Melody Powers stories you could even get Tom's mom excited!"

"Uh, thanks Quinn – I think." Daria responded.

Turning to Tom, Amy asked, "And what about your interview?"

He answered, "I will be interviewing for a position as an entry level auditor with a firm that audits major Wall Street players. If you are excited by accounting, then it is pretty heady stuff. Last year some people the firm audited wound up in jail because they found tax evasion and even some swindling going on!"

"Oh my!" was Amy's only reply.

Helen said, "I really hope it goes well for you, Tom. You both have some really exciting things ahead of you. Believe me when I say that you really need to enjoy these next few years. They will be some of the best of your lives. There will be exciting new things to learn and experience. That goes for you too, Jane."

"Thanks Mrs. Morgendorffer," Jane replied.

Helen chuckled, "Just call me Helen, Jane. You are all adults now." Pausing and then letting out a faint sigh she finished with, "It all seemed to happen so fast."

Amy nodded as everyone continued eating.