"...And another thing!"

Kagari burst out laughing as inspector Ginoza sloshed cheap wine on himself in the midst of his exuberant complaining.

"Gino-san, maybe you should sit down?"

Ginoza stared at him coldly.

"And just why should I do that? Enforcer Kagari?"

Kagari held his arms up and made a motion like he was backing away.

"Hey, hey, no reason, Gino-san," a grin split across Kagari's face. "But you might want to get that suit cleaned."

Ginoza glanced down at himself, somehow self-aware enough to notice the big, sticky, red stain pooled on his crisp, white shirt.

"Now, why, on earth," Ginoza hiccuped. "Would my enforcer -" hiccup - "give me-" hiccup - "red wine?"

"You asked and I delivered, Gino-san!"

"I don't remember asking for this!" Ginoza set his now-empty glass on Kagari's kitchen counter, and wobbled to the middle of his quarters where the couch was. He plopped down ceremoniously and called back at Kagari.

"Are you happy now?"

"I was happy already! I'm always happy when you come to visit." Kagari brought his own glass with him to the couch and sat down next to Ginoza. "But really, what were you saying?"

"I was saying... um..."

"You were mentioning inspector Akane-chan?"

"Ah, that's it. And don't call her Akane-chan! That's too familiar for an enforcer!"

Kagari poked him in the side and winked, eager to tease his superior. "Are you sure you aren't just jealous?"

Kagari could guarantee it wasn't just the alcohol to blame for the rosy color on Ginoza's cheeks.

"Of c-course not," he stammered. "Why would I be jealous?"

"I don't know, Akane-chan," Ginoza glared at him. "I mean Tsunemori-san," Kagari glared back playfully. "Is pretty cute. You need to get yourself a girlfriend, Gino-san, don't you think?"

Ginoza made a choking sound. "Th-that's... that's totally inappropriate! We are colleagues! Besides, who am I to say if she's c-cute or not? I don't care about things like that." The last sentence was said without conviction.

Kagari couldn't contain another fit of laughter. "You're a terrible liar, Gino-san. Especially when you're drunk."

"I'm not drunk!"

"And I'm the unit chief of the CID."

"What? No you're not!"

"Exactly."

Ginoza crossed his arms and harrumphed.

"You really want to prove you aren't drunk?" An entertaining idea came to Kagari.

"You seem convinced that I am, and I can't have you, y'know, spreading rumors about me!" Ginoza poked a finger into Kagari's chest. "So I better do something to prove my very-" - hiccup - "obvious-" - hiccup - "sobriety!"

Kagari clapped his hands together. "Excellent. I have a great idea. Why don't we call Akane-chan, I mean, Tsunemori-san?"

Ginoza's face grew puzzled, like he was trying to stifle an eagerness that arose quickly in him. A deeper flush returned to his cheeks. "Why would we do that?"

"Because you want to, first of all."

"I do n-"

"Second of all, because if you can hold a regular conversation with her, I promise to believe that you aren't drunk and to for sure definitely not ever tell anyone, especially not Shion-san, about this."

Ginoza rolled his eyes. "Fine." Hiccup.

Kagari pulled out his communicator with a devious smile. It rang a few times before:

"Kagari-kun? What is it?"

"Oh, it's not very important, Akane-chan, but Gino-san and I are at my quarters discussing some, um, sensitive case material, and we felt like you should be in on the conversation. Right, Gino-san?"

"Right you are, inspector Kagari, I mean! Enforcer Kagari! Inspector Tsunemori, perhaps you can help if I tell you about the case and -"

Kagari interrupted him. "Gino-san also needs to make sure you know he doesn't think that you're cute. This is very important. Go on and tell her, Gino-san."

Tsunemori yelped in surprise from the other end of the phone line, and Ginoza's jaw dropped.

"Kagari! What are you, I mean, Tsunemori, it's not that I don't think, I mean, I do think, you're well c-cute, b-but only professionally, I mean," his stammering grew more and more incoherent as he went on, until Kagari pulled the communicator back towards him.

"Well, Akane-chan, just needed to clear that little bit of information up."

"Kagari-kun! Did you get Ginoza-san drunk?" She sounded flustered. "You're making him say things he doesn't mean! That's not very nice of you."

"Don't you know, Akane-chan? Alcohol makes men tell the whole truth. Well, you and Gino-san are together on the early shift tomorrow with me, so you better get some sleep. Later!" He hung up.

Ginoza grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled their faces together.

"What in the name of god was that?!"

"Akane-chan always likes to know the truth. It's why she's a detective! She should know this, too. Now, Gino-san, I don't think you're going to make it home. Why don't you sleep here again?"

"Me? Sleep here? After that?" But Ginoza's eyes were already half-closed, and his legs were extended on the couch as though he were already laying down to go to sleep.

Kagari nodded. "Yep! I'll take care of it." He got up and flitted around his quarters, collecting pillows, blankets, and a large glass of water.

"Drink all of it, Gino-san, and another one after that. Then you can go to sleep."

The next morning, Ginoza stumbled into the office, suit uncharacteristically rumpled and his glasses barely hiding the pallor of his face.

Tsunemori barely acknowledged him as he came in, but once they were both settled at their desks, Kagari waltzed through the door.

"If it isn't my two favorite inspectors! I'm so glad everything is out in the open now! We can work together so much better now that we got our little chat about Gino-san's feelings out of the way!"

Tsunemori blushed and looked away without responding.

Ginoza, with great effort, got up and walked over to him, dropped his voice low and venomous, "Kagari, you better hope to all the powers that be that we don't have to go into the field today, because I swear I will shoot you with my dominator before we get to the paddy wagon."

Kagari reached his hands up to adjust Ginoza's crooked glasses, and with the most innocent smile in the world said, "Here's hoping!" With a wink he added, "It would totally be worth it though."

Ginoza growled in irritation as he walked back to his desk.