Once a month, the Pawnee Parks and Recreation department had a town meeting. This was required by City Council. It was January and at least fifty citizens were crowded in the room.
"Okay" Ron Swanson said. "Like all other meetings held in this room, this meeting will be nothing more than a waste of time and taxpayer money. Now I hope you don't think that I'm here because I care about you or what you have to say. Now let's get this over with."
A woman stood up. "I want to know the rude pudgy guy works in government."
Ron stood up. "I work for the government for the same reason we send spies to work for foreign military units; to destroy them. Now if you have anymore stupid or pointless questions, please direct them to my associate, Leslie Knope."
He sat down again. The woman flipped him the finger.
"Kiss my ass" Ron told her. A man stood up. "I was reading the paper and a kid came up and starting talking to me and I want to know why."
"Leslie I got this" Ron said. He stood up. "Our freedom of speech is guaranteed by the 1st Amendment. It clearly states that we have the right to talk whenever we want, to whoever we want to. Now I personally cannot imagine why anyone would want to talk you but if that kid found you interesting, that's his business."
A woman stood up. "You still haven't done anything about the poison ivy. This is the fifth time I've complained."
"And this is the fifth time you will be ignored" Ron said. "It's January. Save your complaint for another time. Please and thank you."
Leslie ended the meeting in order to avoid further embarrassment.