~And I don't wanna fall to pieces, I just want to sit and stare at you. I don't want to talk about it, 'cause I'm in love with you. -Avril Lavigne, Fall to Pieces.~
Dear Luke,
I don't know why I'm doing this.
This is absolutely pointless, you know. It's not like writing to you is going to bring you back. And it's not like you'll ever receive what I'm writing. You know why that is. I know why. Everyone knows why.
You're dead.
It's Thalia, in case you haven't guessed already. I bet your also wondering why I'm writing this ludicrous letter to you. Apparently I haven't been the same since you left, well, died. You don't know how hard it was to write that word on paper. Died. It's leaving an indentation now, from how tightly I'm pressing the tip down. Because now that it's down on paper, it's true. I know it's been true, but it seems like your still here. Laughing, smiling, living. Every time I close my eyes, I see you Luke. It scares me a little, but for some reason it's okay.
Luke, to everyone else you were just some demigod who hated the gods, and in the end was a hero. But to me Luke, you were so much more. You were my best friend. You were strong and brave, and always told me never to give up, even when things looked bleak, and all hope seemed to disappear. You were the one who kept me going, when everything seemed so insane and hopeless.
Doesn't it just seems like yesterday when we met as kids for the first time? Me, Annabeth and... well, you. Running away together as a family. A family that would never fall apart like ours did. A family that had each other's backs. Remember the blood oath that we took, promising that we'd forever be a family? Well, that blood pact didn't last very long, right? Gods Luke, I miss you- oh Zeus, I better stop that stuff before I get all sappy.
I should probably let you how Annabeth's doing. Even though you've hurt her beyond repair, I still think that you're entitled to know. She's actually been better than she has been, in a very long time. Of course she cried once or twice, (that I know of) for you. Did you know that? I don't know. But she's happy. Annabeth has Percy now. There together. Like a couple. I'm happy for them, considering how long they've been crushing on each other and they seem to belong together, like two puzzle pieces connecting. They balance each other. Like two half's of a whole. Luke I'm a little embarrassed to ask this question but... did you love Annabeth, not like family but... want to hold and kiss? Not when Annabeth was little, that would be creepy, but when she was around your age? Gods I can't believe I'm asking this, but I had this feeling like you did, and Percy seemed always jealous when Annabeth said anything about you. I found it hilarious! But did you love Annabeth more than friends? You know what... never mind forget I asked! Besides you can't anyways right?
Because your gone.
I suppose you're wondering why I'm pouring my thoughts out to you in a letter that you will never possibly receive. But Lady Artemis ordered me to do this, said it would be easier to let go. I guess you should know that I haven't cried since you died. Artemis told me I'm in shock, from you dying. I know the reason why I'm not crying, and maybe it's shock, but I don't care. The reason I'm not crying or sobbing, is because if I cry, then it's real. And if it's real than you actually... died. I know you died, it's in my mind playing over and over again. But my heart is saying otherwise.
I guess this is the part where I go all badass on you. Where I yell and lecture you for betraying us. For leaving us. What were you thinking Luke? What the hell went through your mind, when you decided to join them? Kronos? Huh, Luke? I know you hated the Gods and wanted your revenge. But what about Annabeth? I wasn't there Luke, in case you thought about me at all. Annabeth loved you Luke, in a boyfriend- girlfriend way, or a family way, or in even a friendship way! Annabeth still loved you. And you betrayed her.
She was alone.
I wasn't there and she was all alone. Sure she had other friends, but Annabeth needed you. And you weren't there when you should've been. Did you honestly think that Annabeth would ever join the Titans with you? Is that why you did it? You figured that Annabeth would want the same thing as you? Well News-flash Luke, we all want different things. And then you tried to kill Percy. He trusted you, and became your friend. Looked up to you. And you tried to kill him. And then me, Luke, you poisoned me, not just some stupid pine tree!
It. Was. Me.
And you tried to kill me! And when the fleece healed me and I learned about you betraying us, all the things you did, I knew it was far too late to get you back. Man, I didn't mean to get you guilty, I honestly tried to avoid this part. But I felt like I needed to get this down. It feels like it's out of my head, Luke.
To tell you the truth... I'm jealous of Percy and Annabeth's relationship. I wish I had something like that. But I suppose now I can't being a hunter and all.
Luke, I'm not sure if you would hate me for saying this but... I loved you Luke and not in a family way. No, correction- I love you, still.
You didn't know how I felt, and I regret not telling you the moment I knew. Because then it was too late to tell you. So I'm telling you now. I'm not asking you to wait for me in the underworld, I just wanted to get this off my chest. You have no idea how much I would give up just to go back and tell you how I felt. Because then maybe you wouldn't do the things you did. And you and I would be together. I love you so much Luke, everything about you. Your bright blue eyes, your soft blonde hair, your personality. Oh Gods, I sound like a daughter of Aphrodite. So, yeah, I love you, Luke. But I also hate you Luke, so much! You're the one who made me go through all of this, you're the one who caused everyone you cared about to hurt and feel pain. Especially me. You have no idea how much it hurts, everything we ever had was broken, destroyed, shattered and gone. Including my heart.
The only difference between my heart and what we had, is my hearts not gone, it's still there and mending quickly.
And it will always be there, no matter how much I go through. And I realize now Luke, that it's time to say goodbye and let go. And I hope you will too. So goodbye Luke, and our memories.
I hope I see you again in another life.
The most badass girl you ever met,
Thalia Grace.
A/N: So OOC! And short. But, I wrote this in fifth grade, and decided to edit it and publish it. I hope it's not as terrible as I think it is. I forever ship Luke/Thalia. I love them together! Before I start ranting please feel free to leave a review! I'd love to get your input, even if it's a flame. Also, don't feel shy to follow or favorite. Everything you fans do means a lot! Oh, and I don't own PJO.