Whisper
~hotsleekeyz~
***KuramaXBotan fiction. One chapter.
~*~*~*~
Her faint heartbeats touched kindly on my chest that beat only her name. . .
Botan. . .
~*~*~*~
That was the night that my every reverie and nightmare suited into a reality.
The night that we've both long waited in agony. . .
The night that the Deity of Death---meets Death.
~*~*~*~
Botan's eyes were tightly shut in utmost pain.
I, the wretched felon that lurks in the night caused her that pain--- because I love her, and I want her to exist in knowing that I do.
It wasn't supposed to happen that way, but it was her curse. The Deity that brings the curse of Death IS cursed.
~*~*~*~
She is not supposed to be loved. Nor is she given the right to love.
It was her curse.
Her ill-fated reward for being the Goddess that she is.
And I love her. . .
And she told me more than once that she felt the same way, though not in the exact words that I put it lest, she'd be punished by the gods themselves.
~*~*~*~
There she was in my arms---seemingly tranquil and serene.
Though in pain. . .
The pain that only I dared bring to her already agonized entity.
I loved her and I braved to dance Fate by spending the moonlight with her under the covers.
There was no reluctance in her acceptance of my invitation. It came as we both wanted it. . . even if we knew the consequences.
~*~*~*~
"Kurama, promise me that you will forget me when I'm gone"
"No Botan, I won't"
In her own constraint, she shook her head. "Love, you have to. You can't live with my curse"
"The curse that I've brought you? Botan, I will share with you the sufferings that I've brought"
"Didn't I tell you that it is by my will to submit myself to you? Even if I have to sacrifice my half-life?"
Hard as I tried, a tear fell from my eye. Regret flooded me, as it shouldn't have ended that way.
It was unfair.
I loved her without considering the chastisement. Her death in the life she has brought in filling my soul with hers in a night that shouldn't have come. . .
"Why Botan? Why do you have to suffer like that? Not one should be denied of love---not something as a beautiful creature as you love. Why did it have to be you?"
"I've stalled long to requite your affection Kurama. It's time that I share with you what you deserve. I feared much of my own Fate but knew well it would bring me rapture to go beyond my boundaries and explore what is not to be"
"You speak as if this is not goodbye"
"It won't be Kurama. I promise"
"Then what will happen in a few moments? Is it not Death that will meet you?"
"No love, it's life. My life in being with you at last. . ."
~*~*~*~
Minutes passed and my own heart beat faster than it could have ever done before. I feared. I was afraid to witness such fragile death of a goddess.
It was an honor and a curse. . .
To see the woman I so loved die in my arms. . .
Only because we took the decision to share our souls for the first and last time.
~*~*~*~
We both lay on the bed trying to fight of the grief that filled the whole room. The silence that won over us was too defeaning. . . too eerie that even I, feared it.
~*~*~*~
It's been long that she writhed violently in my embrace.
Pale flush and dead sweating.
Almost lifeless.
Though in pain.
I've caused her that pain.
~*~*~*~
"Kurama, I--- I want you to know---"
I gently laid a finger on her soft lips. No words shall consume her.
"Hush now. Save it. Don't die that painful death"
"But pain devours my senses dry love. . ."
"Hush. Rest"
I choked on my very words. It seemed as if I wanted her to leave for real.
~*~*~*~
An hour and a quarter had already passed.
She was wet with her precious tears that had flown freely on her colorless cheeks. Every tear killed her leisurely.
"This is my punishment"
I shook my head, possessing her more constricted in my grasp. I didn't want to let her drift away feeling as if I wasn't there.
She had to realize I was just there.
Though her mind noticeably was already in a tumult. Her cheeks were tensed and taut.
And those beautiful eyes that I loved to stare at never showed itself again.
Her eyes remained shut. She didn't dare open them.
~*~*~*~
"It's time. . ."
Too faint yet it rang more audibly in my mind over and over, louder the next time it rung in my head.
It was such a convoluted impulse to bear acknowledging.
//She can't die. . . She can't die//
I tried convincing myself Botan could never die. It could have only been a threat of Koenma-sama to keep Botan to himself.
They are bound yet forever. . .
But not in love.
The thief I am, I stole that right from him. . .
~*~*~*~
"Please don't cry Kurama. Let me die happy"
Botan didn't understand the words that came out of her lips.
She was asking me to do the impossible.
I've tried hard to keep my emotions bottled up to help her transcend.
And no, the thought of losing her after I've finally decided to tell her I did love her was just crazy.
I thought I was getting mad.
~*~*~*~
Groans. . .
Painful moans that only Botan and I heard. We shared that laborious melody that drifted us off both into reality that we deviated from hours before.
"Botan, are you contented?"
"Never have I been in my whole life"
I swear I felt her hand clutch mine even more constricting. She was holding on to my hand as the only thing that connects her to her Life, from her Death.
~*~*~*~
I never understood how Botan put it in. She called her existence as the Deity as her Death, and her inexistence her Life.
~*~*~*~
"Kill me now Kurama"
"What? Botan could you repeat what you just said?"
"Kill me. Take my life away"
"NO!"
"Please. End my suffering"
"No. I will never forgive myself to eternity if I shall give in to that. I'm sorry Botan, that is one thing I'll never give you"
"Please. . ."
"No. I will not do that"
"Please"
"I don't believe in taking lives anymore. I can't do that"
"Kurama, please. I beg you"
"This is not the way it should end. You will fight Botan. You will not surrender to my hands"
"Why Kurama? You've been a slayer all your life. . ."
"The moment I found out how it is to love, I learned to value life and I will not take yours and pretend that I didn't take years to understand what the word means"
"Please. . . end it now. It's too painful"
"I can't. I'm sorry"
"No. . ."
"Botan?"
"Kurama. . . if you don't take my life now I will stay forever like this. . . This is the Death that Koenma claimed Life could be. My Life is nonexistent and the only thing that I have is Death. . . Kurama, this pain that I have right now is my Death. This is my punishment. There is no end to my Death"
"No Botan! I told you I will NOT do that!"
Silence.
Soft moans and the tension between her and I grew even more intensed.
"Kurama, this would be the last time I plead before you. We've decided upon this together. We loved each other when it was forbidden. I knew what was in store for me if I gave in to it. . . I even told you the sentence. But we have too much of love that we were blinded to what it could bring. And this---this pain that you try much to share is already too much. I've suffered long to live what is in curse and I never gained satisfaction in gratifying my responsibility. It's only in you that I found contentment. And only you could bring me to my final breath. It's part of the curse love. Your punishment for going against the will of the gods"
"Would you be happy if I did it?"
A suppressed tear rolled down my eye again.
"Yes Kurama. . .This love is our surrender. . ."
Reluctantly, I conjured Botan's fatal blow. . . my plants that shot out from behind me.
~*~*~*~
Noxious thorns were aimed all around Botan. I didn't want to do it.
She emitted the most appeased smile that I ever saw. It differed greatly to what I used to remember when we were together in our concealed fervor.
"Do it. . ."
"Botan?"
"Kurama. . . please"
Her little hands clutched onto mine. I released it and threw my arms around her.
It was the last and I couldn't let it pass without making her feel that I did it in reluctance.
"Botan, I don't want to do this but I---"
"I know Kurama. I forgive you for this"
"But I will never forgive myself for taking your life away. I just want you to know that---"
Before I could utter those three words, she pulled away from me and pushed herself against the venomous thorns behind her.
~*~*~*~
"I love you. . ."
We both uttered in vain.
~*~*~*~
Botan made sure that I didn't kill her.
She ended it herself.
~*~*~*~
I ordered the plants to take its thorns away and Botan slumped lifelessly on her back, beside me on the bed.
She was dead.
~*~*~*~
Botan knew well I loved her cheerful eyes and loving smile that she passed away without erasing those traces on her face. . .
I took my hand over her eyes to close it. . .
But I didn't dare touch her lips. . .
Lips that were mine just moments before.
~*~*~*~
I was helpless.
All I heard where her faint words that run tediously in my ears.
Her pleads.
Her groans.
The voice of her agony. . .
All spoken in her whisper.
~Disclaimer: I don't own characters, setting, etc. Except: the plot is mine.~
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
my second attempt to write fics for YuYu.
Apologies.
Please help out and review anything and everything.
***KuramaXBotan fiction. One chapter.
~*~*~*~
Her faint heartbeats touched kindly on my chest that beat only her name. . .
Botan. . .
~*~*~*~
That was the night that my every reverie and nightmare suited into a reality.
The night that we've both long waited in agony. . .
The night that the Deity of Death---meets Death.
~*~*~*~
Botan's eyes were tightly shut in utmost pain.
I, the wretched felon that lurks in the night caused her that pain--- because I love her, and I want her to exist in knowing that I do.
It wasn't supposed to happen that way, but it was her curse. The Deity that brings the curse of Death IS cursed.
~*~*~*~
She is not supposed to be loved. Nor is she given the right to love.
It was her curse.
Her ill-fated reward for being the Goddess that she is.
And I love her. . .
And she told me more than once that she felt the same way, though not in the exact words that I put it lest, she'd be punished by the gods themselves.
~*~*~*~
There she was in my arms---seemingly tranquil and serene.
Though in pain. . .
The pain that only I dared bring to her already agonized entity.
I loved her and I braved to dance Fate by spending the moonlight with her under the covers.
There was no reluctance in her acceptance of my invitation. It came as we both wanted it. . . even if we knew the consequences.
~*~*~*~
"Kurama, promise me that you will forget me when I'm gone"
"No Botan, I won't"
In her own constraint, she shook her head. "Love, you have to. You can't live with my curse"
"The curse that I've brought you? Botan, I will share with you the sufferings that I've brought"
"Didn't I tell you that it is by my will to submit myself to you? Even if I have to sacrifice my half-life?"
Hard as I tried, a tear fell from my eye. Regret flooded me, as it shouldn't have ended that way.
It was unfair.
I loved her without considering the chastisement. Her death in the life she has brought in filling my soul with hers in a night that shouldn't have come. . .
"Why Botan? Why do you have to suffer like that? Not one should be denied of love---not something as a beautiful creature as you love. Why did it have to be you?"
"I've stalled long to requite your affection Kurama. It's time that I share with you what you deserve. I feared much of my own Fate but knew well it would bring me rapture to go beyond my boundaries and explore what is not to be"
"You speak as if this is not goodbye"
"It won't be Kurama. I promise"
"Then what will happen in a few moments? Is it not Death that will meet you?"
"No love, it's life. My life in being with you at last. . ."
~*~*~*~
Minutes passed and my own heart beat faster than it could have ever done before. I feared. I was afraid to witness such fragile death of a goddess.
It was an honor and a curse. . .
To see the woman I so loved die in my arms. . .
Only because we took the decision to share our souls for the first and last time.
~*~*~*~
We both lay on the bed trying to fight of the grief that filled the whole room. The silence that won over us was too defeaning. . . too eerie that even I, feared it.
~*~*~*~
It's been long that she writhed violently in my embrace.
Pale flush and dead sweating.
Almost lifeless.
Though in pain.
I've caused her that pain.
~*~*~*~
"Kurama, I--- I want you to know---"
I gently laid a finger on her soft lips. No words shall consume her.
"Hush now. Save it. Don't die that painful death"
"But pain devours my senses dry love. . ."
"Hush. Rest"
I choked on my very words. It seemed as if I wanted her to leave for real.
~*~*~*~
An hour and a quarter had already passed.
She was wet with her precious tears that had flown freely on her colorless cheeks. Every tear killed her leisurely.
"This is my punishment"
I shook my head, possessing her more constricted in my grasp. I didn't want to let her drift away feeling as if I wasn't there.
She had to realize I was just there.
Though her mind noticeably was already in a tumult. Her cheeks were tensed and taut.
And those beautiful eyes that I loved to stare at never showed itself again.
Her eyes remained shut. She didn't dare open them.
~*~*~*~
"It's time. . ."
Too faint yet it rang more audibly in my mind over and over, louder the next time it rung in my head.
It was such a convoluted impulse to bear acknowledging.
//She can't die. . . She can't die//
I tried convincing myself Botan could never die. It could have only been a threat of Koenma-sama to keep Botan to himself.
They are bound yet forever. . .
But not in love.
The thief I am, I stole that right from him. . .
~*~*~*~
"Please don't cry Kurama. Let me die happy"
Botan didn't understand the words that came out of her lips.
She was asking me to do the impossible.
I've tried hard to keep my emotions bottled up to help her transcend.
And no, the thought of losing her after I've finally decided to tell her I did love her was just crazy.
I thought I was getting mad.
~*~*~*~
Groans. . .
Painful moans that only Botan and I heard. We shared that laborious melody that drifted us off both into reality that we deviated from hours before.
"Botan, are you contented?"
"Never have I been in my whole life"
I swear I felt her hand clutch mine even more constricting. She was holding on to my hand as the only thing that connects her to her Life, from her Death.
~*~*~*~
I never understood how Botan put it in. She called her existence as the Deity as her Death, and her inexistence her Life.
~*~*~*~
"Kill me now Kurama"
"What? Botan could you repeat what you just said?"
"Kill me. Take my life away"
"NO!"
"Please. End my suffering"
"No. I will never forgive myself to eternity if I shall give in to that. I'm sorry Botan, that is one thing I'll never give you"
"Please. . ."
"No. I will not do that"
"Please"
"I don't believe in taking lives anymore. I can't do that"
"Kurama, please. I beg you"
"This is not the way it should end. You will fight Botan. You will not surrender to my hands"
"Why Kurama? You've been a slayer all your life. . ."
"The moment I found out how it is to love, I learned to value life and I will not take yours and pretend that I didn't take years to understand what the word means"
"Please. . . end it now. It's too painful"
"I can't. I'm sorry"
"No. . ."
"Botan?"
"Kurama. . . if you don't take my life now I will stay forever like this. . . This is the Death that Koenma claimed Life could be. My Life is nonexistent and the only thing that I have is Death. . . Kurama, this pain that I have right now is my Death. This is my punishment. There is no end to my Death"
"No Botan! I told you I will NOT do that!"
Silence.
Soft moans and the tension between her and I grew even more intensed.
"Kurama, this would be the last time I plead before you. We've decided upon this together. We loved each other when it was forbidden. I knew what was in store for me if I gave in to it. . . I even told you the sentence. But we have too much of love that we were blinded to what it could bring. And this---this pain that you try much to share is already too much. I've suffered long to live what is in curse and I never gained satisfaction in gratifying my responsibility. It's only in you that I found contentment. And only you could bring me to my final breath. It's part of the curse love. Your punishment for going against the will of the gods"
"Would you be happy if I did it?"
A suppressed tear rolled down my eye again.
"Yes Kurama. . .This love is our surrender. . ."
Reluctantly, I conjured Botan's fatal blow. . . my plants that shot out from behind me.
~*~*~*~
Noxious thorns were aimed all around Botan. I didn't want to do it.
She emitted the most appeased smile that I ever saw. It differed greatly to what I used to remember when we were together in our concealed fervor.
"Do it. . ."
"Botan?"
"Kurama. . . please"
Her little hands clutched onto mine. I released it and threw my arms around her.
It was the last and I couldn't let it pass without making her feel that I did it in reluctance.
"Botan, I don't want to do this but I---"
"I know Kurama. I forgive you for this"
"But I will never forgive myself for taking your life away. I just want you to know that---"
Before I could utter those three words, she pulled away from me and pushed herself against the venomous thorns behind her.
~*~*~*~
"I love you. . ."
We both uttered in vain.
~*~*~*~
Botan made sure that I didn't kill her.
She ended it herself.
~*~*~*~
I ordered the plants to take its thorns away and Botan slumped lifelessly on her back, beside me on the bed.
She was dead.
~*~*~*~
Botan knew well I loved her cheerful eyes and loving smile that she passed away without erasing those traces on her face. . .
I took my hand over her eyes to close it. . .
But I didn't dare touch her lips. . .
Lips that were mine just moments before.
~*~*~*~
I was helpless.
All I heard where her faint words that run tediously in my ears.
Her pleads.
Her groans.
The voice of her agony. . .
All spoken in her whisper.
~Disclaimer: I don't own characters, setting, etc. Except: the plot is mine.~
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
my second attempt to write fics for YuYu.
Apologies.
Please help out and review anything and everything.