A/N: Hjje, My first ice age story/songfic, i hope it's good. It's told in the point of view from Shira, a quick view in her past.
Song: Numb from Linkin Park.
…
"I always needed to be the perfect girl, my dad thought i loved it when the boys came to me and asking stuff like ' Are you free tonight? ' No, it was annoying! I used to be just like my mother he said, always listening never daydreaming. When i was a cub he always told me ' No playing you're too old for that' Well…he said it from the first day i was born. I hate him still after all these years.
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
All i wanted was to be myself, i wanted the world to see who i am. But what i did it never was good enough. " Dad, can i go hunting with Dale? " I asked, i was six back then and my brother Dale was fourteen. If he could hunt from four years old, why couldn't i? " No honey, you can't you're here safer with your mother i'll go with him. " He said, my mother never hunted by herself and didn't say anything about it, it was normal for her.
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there,
Become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
I couldn't hunt, i learned it myself. When no one was looking i slipped away from our cave and searched for places where nobody was, the first time i couldn't kill the poor animal and let it go. It looked so helpless it was an rabbit and looked with big pleading eyes into mine, i could see the fear so clearly. I tried again two days later and it worked i was happy the first time in years. After practicing with rabbits i tried a deer i killed it with ease. I thought i could care of myself so one night when i was thirteen i ran away.
Can't you see that you're smothering me,
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control?
'Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you.
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you.
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take.
I run as fast as i could, i didn't stop for anything . The night has fallen and i found an rest place in a cave, i laid my head on my paws and close my eyes. I saw flashes in front of my eyes, i saw my dad's face when he would find out that i wasn't there in the morning. I almost laughed out loud, i would bet he's going to think i disappointed him. Well i would say one thing. 'It's your own fold!' He loved his son more than his daughter, it was unfair. I loved Dale he treaded me normal he loved me, sometimes he told bedtime stories. I think he's the only one i'm going to miss, i wouldn't even miss my mother. She looked at me like i was just air, with other words, she looked straight through me. I could tell she didn't love me the way Dale did, or she was scared for my dad.
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there, And I know
Become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you.
I may end up failing too.
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you.
I slept 'till the sun shine high in the sky, i walked out of the cave and searched for some water to drink. When i found it i saw it wasn't just a river or something, it was the sea. I looked at my reflection i looked just like my mom, She had the same fur and stripes, her eyes were icy-blue, just like mine. My dad looked nothing like me, He had a tawny color and had dark brown eyes. Was he my real dad? I didn't know, i never got the chance to ask and if i got it, i was scared for his reaction.
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there,
Become so tired, so much more aware.
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you.
I stared a couple of minutes in the water, than i heard something and looked up. " A…a…a Pirate ship, or a block ice? " I asked myself out loud. I saw a monkey. Then i heard something behind me, i saw my DAD! I tried to run away but in vain. " Shira! " He yelled at me angry and launched himself onto me with his claws he tried scratching me i tried to block his attacks but i couldn't block all of them. The monkey saw everything and took an sharp looking knife and stabbed my dad in the shoulder, i didn't care i even smiled at the thought of him dead. My father walked slowly off of me and looked the monkey in the eyes, Then my father fell. I looked at him and walked up to the monkey. " Thanks uh…" I started but i didn't know his name. " Captain Gutt. " Capt. Gutt finished for me. "
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there.
(I'm tired of being what you want me to be)
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there.
(I'm tired of being what you want me to be)
" That's how I ended up by him. "
A/N: so…this is it. I hope you liked it. Feel free to review.
