Reminiscence: Misaki
A follow-up piece to Eternity. Like that one, this one is written to a song: Juunigatsu no Love Song by Gackt (English version). So basically December Love Song. Lyrics are from the English one while I listen to the Japanese version on repeat for like half a day... Lolz~
Ugh. Anyways, I hope it's alright. I was trying to be descriptive but I kept coming up empty when I wracked my brain for ways to stretch it out while keeping true to the lyrics.
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It was that time of year.
The city was festive as a hushed excitement buzzed in the air. Lights glittered in the darkness of evening, lining the busy avenues. Purples, greens, reds; rainbows of colours reflected against the black of the night sky. Each sign luring the easy-going passerby to stop in for an unbeatable deal. The jingle of a bell as doors opened and shut, a brief wisp of warm air dancing out before it fizzled in the chill.
The crisp coolness of winter had settled in, but no one paid any mind to that. Couples used that as an excuse to cuddle even closer, walking hand in hand. Men smiling indulgently as their girlfriends or wives gazed into shops with brilliant sparkles of excitement in their eyes. Women gleefully pointing out the items they liked, a hint of what was expected and desired.
Stepping out of her apartment and onto the street, Misaki shivered and tugged her jacket closer around her. She was hungry and tired; tired of her own company. A time of year where love and good cheer permeated into every corner of the earth, she just couldn't feel it. The one thing she didn't have to worry about was Kanami as she was kept busy during the Christmas season - parties, shopping and men, all the things she loved.
Shuffling her way down the street in search of food, she shoved her hands into her pockets to keep them warm. The lack of energy was due largely in part to a bittersweet memory that couldn't help but surface to the forefront of her mind. Any other year would have been different. Not now, and never again would she be oblivious to the lucky couples who giggled and flirted; things she didn't have a chance of doing...
"Li," she murmured to herself.
He had left to return home. A void had filled her entirety when he had said good-bye. Even now, she couldn't help wishing that things had been different.
She gazed into the darkened gaps in between buildings. The shadows there untouched by the blinding lights mirroring the depths of her heart. So easily and so painfully, she remembered him. The greens brought to mind his jacket, the white his simple button-up shirt, the blue his eyes; things about him she would never forget - and didn't want to.
All alone in the city, she remembered the night they had spent together. The way they had chatted casually, sitting across from each other at the restaurant; the easy camaraderie; the laughter over his imitation of her; the tender flutter of her heart as he handed her a drink; the gentle tug of sympathy as he spoke of his sister; the serene silence gazing up as they waited for the stars...
With the settling of the chilly air, she wondered if he was thinking of her now like she was thinking of him; wondering if he felt the same. He had promised his love.
Again reminded of him, as she had been often, she continued on her way, foregoing the evening meal. The painful squeeze of her heart was enough to quench her hunger.
Her emotions had hit rock bottom; depressed with her life how it was. Work had been enough before. It had always been enough, even when he had been around. But now that he was gone...
Another shiver went down her spine and she wished he were here with her, to hold her hands and hold her close; to protect her from the cold. More than anything, a longing pierced her heart, to hear his voice once more - the way he had whispered her name that fateful night. Always looking and hoping, yet knowing... The loneliness was tearing her to pieces.
"Li," she murmured again.
Tears welled up in her eyes, threatening to spill over. Instead of walking on, she found a secluded bench to settle on. As she gazed up at the sky, she realized that light snowfall had started. The snowflakes glistened in the light; falling gently like the tears that streamed down her cheeks.
They said misery loved company, but not hers. She only wanted the company of one. There were so many things she wanted to say to him...
Save your smile for me.
Remember me and love me always.
Hold on to all we had.
Fall into my arms and let me hold you tight.
Kiss me once more.
Tell me you'll love me again.