A/N: I wrote this a while ago after watching the Hunger Games for the millionth time. I've been mulling over it ever since, tweaking it here and there pretending to myself that it wasn't quite finished, when in reality, I'm just nervous about posting it. I haven't been around too long - just over a year and feel like I haven't even made a dent in the incredible fanfictions posted here there and everywhere; so if there is a story similar to this somewhere out there, I am genuinely sorry and I definitely don't mean to cause any offence.
Notes: No triggers. Canon. Oh, and everlark written in Peeta's POV.
"-Everdeen." My heart stops. I don't know which name it was, but one of the Everdeen girls just got reaped. The only reason I don't know what name it was is because I was too busy hoping and praying those names weren't the ones called. Not Primrose because she's barely 12. And Katniss, well, anyone but Katniss. I would even go as far as say I'd prefer me going into the arena over Katniss.
The boys around me are shorter, they seem to be younger - shouldn't have to be here, but fortunately, I can see over them well enough to know it's not Katniss, but Primrose. Poor, sweet little Prim. My eyes close as I watch her terrified steps as Effie Trinket ushers her towards the stage. She looks as terrified as we all feel.
There's silence. Complete silence. And then I hear it. The dreaded sound I've been waiting for. I hear Katniss' voice and she's screaming for Prim. Quite simply, this doesn't happen at reapings. We stay deathly silent. Sometimes a family member lets out a whimper at the sound of their loved one's name. But naturally Katniss Everdeen missed that memo. I watch her as she desperately fights with the peace keepers that have since separated her and her sister. She's screaming. What she's screaming I don't know. I narrow my eyes and plead with my ears to catch what she's insisting. I need to make sure she isn't saying what I think she is.
I hear the word 'volunteer'. Of course I do. What else would Katniss be shouting over and over again? Katniss just volunteered for her sister. Something else that doesn't happen in District 12. I close my eyes and feel the dread settle in my stomach. With any luck now, it'll be my year to be reaped. Naturally of course, the one opportunity I'm going to get to talk to Katniss, maybe even tell her how I feel, will be a life and death situation.
I can hear Prim's blood curdling screams and Katniss is just apologising over and over again, telling her to go and find their mother. I can see Gale Hawthorne, who Katniss is almost always with, despite him being in the grade above us at school, carry Prim off as she's screaming. Katniss meanwhile continues on as people stare in shock, disbelief and awe.
Katniss makes it onto the stage and when Effie demands a round of applause; we all simultaneously give Katniss our silence and we show the respect she deserves instead with our three fingered salute. I wonder if now would be a good time to volunteer. Can you volunteer for a volunteer? Can a boy volunteer for a girl? I apparently ponder it for too long because Effie Trinket soon announces that it's the boys turn. My heart is racing. I wait for my name, like I do every year. I know I have better odds than some of the seam kids, but really everyone knows it's a fix. They have in who they want in. They want a show. A malnourished seam kid from District 12 doesn't give the Capitol what they want. They want action and drama; a sick child isn't someone who can fulfill their sick obsessions. Or maybe it's more to instill fear; make us fully aware that nobody is safe; not even little Primrose Everdeen. Katniss however had different ideas about that.
Effie Trinket has the card open now. Her mouth is poised to announce the 'lucky' tribute and from her lips my name tumbles. "Peeta Mellark". It rings in my ears just in case I didn't hear it the first time. The dread that was in my stomach is now fear and devastation. I'm not upset that I'm going to have to fight against Katniss and 22 of my peers, well, a part of me is... but rather, the most consuming feeling that is controlling me is the fact that I'm going to die, and I'm going to die for Katniss - the girl I've loved since I was five years old. As I walk up to the stage, I realise that there's only one choice here that I have. I'm going to do everything it takes to keep the girl I love alive... I may not have volunteered to take her place but I'll volunteer my life for her.
When Effie tells us to shake hands, Katniss finally looks at me, and that's when she sees me. Really sees me. I can almost see in her eyes that she's transported back to when we were just eleven years old. Her glazed look tells me she's right back under that tree. I can see the realisation dawn on her face. Yep, it's me. I am the boy with the burnt loaf of bread. The boy with the scars to show for it too. But she only knows me as the boy with the bread. I'm right back there again too, feeling the same desperation. Once again I feel the overwhelming need to save Katniss Everdeen. She takes my hand and I feel the tears rising in my eyes. I try to blink them away, but I feel that essentially it won't make a difference now.
Katniss' palm is sweaty. It's hot out and she's probably feeling as sick as I am. She's somehow found herself here. Me, I'm not surprised. She releases my hand first and I still feel the tingle as we walk through the Justice Building's door, which is a surprise that I can feel anything at all. They send us off to different rooms and I watch from my own door as Katniss shuts the door firmly behind her. I shut my door a few seconds after and take a deep breath as I lean against the mahogany. I feel a rush of emotions overwhelm me as I prepare for my goodbyes. Because they are goodbyes. I'm not coming back to District 12 living and breathing; Katniss is. I'll fight until my last breath for her.
Katniss Everdeen will be the victor of the 74th Hunger Games. I'll do everything I can to send her back to Prim, back to her life. It should be easy, I think as my door opens and the goodbyes begin. Katniss will be saying her 'goodbyes' too; little does she know they're simply 'I'll see you soon' parting words.
I stumble away from the door as it opens. It's my mother and father ready to say goodbye. I can tell my Dad has been crying as he clutches the cookies he always makes the tributes in his hands. When he was making them last night, I don't think he would have ever imagined that I would be taking them from him. He places them down on a table top as he pulls me into his arms and whispers words I don't even hear. He sniffs, straightens his back and moves towards the door - the emotions clearly overcoming him. I turn to face my mother and she looks like her usual self. Naturally, my mother confirms my own thoughts; District 12 might actually get a winner this year - and it won't be me, she kindly informs me. She's right, but I don't really need to hear it spoken out loud. After they leave, I get to say goodbye to my friends, my brothers and some of the wrestling team. They're all telling me I can win this thing. I' m strong, I'm brave... they believe in me - unlike my mother. It's nice to hear but they're all wrong. I'm not going to win.
I may not have been very vocal about my feelings for Katniss in the past, but my actions in these games are going to tell her everything she needs to know: I love her and I'm willing to die for her. The odds will be in her favor.
I'll make sure of it.
Thanks for reading. I'd appreciate any feedback you may have :)