A Looking Glass, Darkly
Summary : AU. What if it really was Raito's subconscious that was killing people and Raito himself doesn't know it?
Disclaimer : Death Note belongs to Tsugumi Ohba.
Chapter One
He called himself Kira, and he lived deep within Raito's psyche. Raito didn't know he exist, and Kira made no move to show himself to Raito. No need for two insane psychopaths to run around. One was more than enough, thank you very much. Two Kira's would only spell doom to the world, so it was better Raito was ignorant. Perhaps it was the strain of Kira, of two vastly different personalities in him, because Raito changed.
Raito was innocently adorable, with a gentle alluring smile and doe-like eyes. He was charming and charismatic. He was a brilliant student and an obedient son. He was a loving brother, and a dutiful boyfriend. He was a perfect person. People loved him and couldn't get enough. And Raito could not see Ryuk, and Raito did not know anything about Death Note. Raito also had several weird habits. Habits that develop overnight.
A strange tendency to scribble names on notebooks. A sudden need to stock apples in his room. Prolonged time in the showers, washing off imaginary dirt. Falling asleep while doing his homework. Interest and pride in Kira's killing. Dislike of the Police force. Waking up strangely sated and satisfied. The habits went on. Raito was confused. Raito concluded he was growing up, nevermind he was already 17. He was probably suffering hormonal overload. It sounds lame to his mind, but that was his only answer.
When L challenged Kira to kill him live on TV, Raito felt a surge of anger. But there was no action from Kira, nothing. Raito watched. Lind L Tailor remains alive. Raito wonders why Kira does not kill L. He was surprised when he woke up the next morning and news was buzzing that Kira was in Japan, in some remote area of Japan Raito had never been to. Lind L Tailor died of a heart attack during a live feed that was exclusive to that remote area. All the live feed was exclusive only to one area, and they discovered Kira's possible location. Raito did not know why he felt irritated but happy. He felt L has misjudged something, but does not know what it was.
Kira laughed and laughed and laughed, surprised at the turnout of the slight delay. He wondered if L knew, would L be shocked, or if like Kira, would he find it funny? The delay was an honest mistake, but now it looked like Lady Luck smiled at Kira, and Fate sided with him. Raito being a possible suspect has been eliminated. Ryuk could not understand the irony. But Kira did, and Kira laughed. The first victory was to Kira, but the battle would be long and tedious. Kira enjoys a challenge. He would slowly break L, and he would enjoy the entire journey to Godhood.
Raito stayed in a good mood for quite some time. He didn't know why but he knows everyone likes it a lot when he was in a good mood. He flirted back when flirted with to the delight of waitresses. His sister says he is more open, he talks to her and not sulk in his room being suspicious and he should stay this way. She says she was afraid of Kira and for their father. Raito smiles, a gentle curving of the lips, and he gazes at her with his doe-like eyes, shy and gentle and full of brotherly love. She believes him when he says Kira wouldn't harm their father, that she shouldn't be afraid of Kira and if anything happens, he would bring Kira to justice. Raito wonders why he felt the promise was meant to be broken.
It was two months later that Raito felt like he was trailed. He doesn't understand why, but soon he will sit for a placement test at Toudai, and he does not like his privacy invaded. There was a feeling that he should do something, like find out the name of the person, but he did not act on it. He told his father in private he was afraid of stalkers, and that he was possibly being stalked. Somehow, tears fell when he spoke and his father believes him when he says the gaze made him feel dirty, violated and afraid. His father promised to investigate.
Kira was not happy. He lost a prey, which he suspects was FBI, and that L sent FBI to trail possible suspects. Now, with Yagami Souichirou knowing, he could not act. Kira could not remove that particular FBI member without Raito being a suspect, and Kira does not know the name of that FBI member. He allows Raito to believe it was a stalker, and he enforces this belief into Raito. The memory of the gazes imprints itself into Raito's mind, and made Raito more sensitive to hostile gazes on him. It couldn't help this time, but next time, Raito would be more aware he was being trailed.
When Raito went to deliver a change of clothing to his father, his father introduced him to a new officer, Raye Penber. It was then Raito felt the same gaze when the officer looked at him. The same feeling of being dirty and violated. Yagami Souichirou noticed Raito turning pale and scared. Raito's smile turn forced, and he flinches when the new officer extend a hand to Raito. Yagami Souichirou might be a workaholic and devout law enforcer, but he was a father, too. Raye Penber was arrested under possible sexual assault, and the FBI was discovered to be trailing possible suspects.
Suspects being children of law enforcers directly related to the Kira case, and Raito was the son of the Commanding Officer of Kira Case in Japan. He was a possible suspect, and he had the means and brilliance to pull it thorough. It seemed like they chased after a ghost, in that remote area, and even L was forced to admit to a tactical mistake on his part. Maybe, just maybe, that Kira decided not to kill immediately, that Kira had restrained himself, not provoked like L thought he would be? Raito was dismissed as delicate, over-sensitive, sheltered and imaginative. Such a frail child couldn't possibly be Kira. He may have the brilliance and means, but not the will, or the mindset. Or the tightly leashed control Kira had to have in order to succeed.
Again, it made Kira laughed. Raito was brilliant, but he was sheltered and delicate. And Kira made sure that it would stay the same. Raito was showing obvious weaknesses, but they were only dispelling suspicion, and Kira did not mind much. After all, the delicateness appeared when their psyche split, and the more Raito was different from Kira, the better. Less to link them together, and Raito was not acting. Even under torture he could not admit to being Kira, or have any knowledge of Kira's crimes, and Raito was the perfect cover for Kira. And Kira would need to rely heavily on Raito not to get caught.
A/N : Please Review. Thanks.