A/N: I've never written Santana, but I was doing my homework and listening to music and well it came to me. I just had to put it down on paper. I'm happy to say it's my longest fic ever! *claps for self*
Disclaimer: If I owned Glee, this would be far more bitchy, because I totally didn't nail Santana write.
Santana couldn't help it, everyone coupled up around her was making her sick. It wasn't even Valentine's anymore and it seemed that everywhere she turned was a new sickingly disgusting couple in the hallway, because they sure as hell weren't a sickingly sweet couple. Santana's loneliness had gotten so bad that she hadn't even taken pleasure in the fact that just the night previous she had finally gotten with Sam. Something she had been looking, oh so forward, to ever since he had gotten with Quinn. Yet it just wasn't the same. Hooking up hadn't been the same for a while now.
It wasn't just the kids in the hallway joining forces in horrible coupleship, it was happening all over Glee Club too. It was almost hard to fathom that so many different combinations could have formed in only little over a year, and even Santana never would have guessed some of the results. I mean seriously, she thought Puck and Lauren were bad, but that was nothing compared to Finn and Mercedes. FINN AND MERCEDES? Seriously, when the hell did that happen? It seems as if that was more of Mercedes getting back at Rachel for something that obviously wasn't important enough for Santana to care about rather than actually liking each other though. It didn't matter to Santana though, because them coupling up had been the last straw.
Santana was officially over the edge, she had no one to turn to anymore either, she had quit Cheerios and Britney was still as coupled up with the cripple as always. Speaking of the cripple, what could he possibly have that Santana didn't? Weren't their hook-ups good enough? At one point, she was sure Britney had even wanted them more than she had. What had changed then? Artie Freakin' Abrams. He couldn't even feel the bottom half of his body for goodness sakes. And damn it all to hell if Santana wasn't better looking than him, he couldn't even get his wardrobe out of the 50's.
It wasn't like Santana to admit when something was bothering her. She rarely even cried, and if someone from Glee were to mention that time she completely broke down after Rachel freaked out on her, she would probably shoot someone, or throw them into a locker. However, if that person was Lauren, it would definitely be the former. So this loneliness thing was really getting to Santana, she was all alone and had no one to confide in, of course, not for a lack of trying.
And boy had Santana tried. Although, in pure Santana way, she hadn't only been looking for someone to confide in, but for a quick fuck too. Everyone in Glee was immediately out of the picture since the whole 'Mono thing', she had no idea how anyone had even found out she had been involved in it, yet alone conducted the whole thing. Yet, it didn't matter to them, she had betrayed her own, once again. Therefore leading Santana to find someone else to confide in.
First, Santana had tried to talk to Jacob Ben Israel. She figured he was always hanging around Glee and that there was no way in hell that he would find himself a girlfriend. He was ugly as shit and had a ginger Jew fro. However, she never would have thought that all he wanted to talk about were her fake knockers, and on camera no less. The whole school already knew about them, it wasn't even like it was breaking news. She seriously had no idea why people even tuned into his shitty blog. After about the third time of denying Jacob the flashing of her boobs for his shitty blog, he started asking if she could get Rachel's underwear. That was it. After throwing him into a locker and stomping on his face- she was from Lima Heights after all- she left in a hurry.
Second, Santana tried the football team. She thought that they had been agreeable enough when they did the mash-up of Thriller/Heads Will Roll together. It wasn't until she actually approached the team that she realized, she didn't like any of them. This left Santana with a dilemma, to stay or to leave. Unfortunately, for her, she was extremely desperate. Thus leading Santana to talk to the asshat that had gotten rid of Kurt, secretly, she hoped he wouldn't get rid of her too. Dave wasn't completely unapproachable, but he definitely wasn't anyone's first choice in someone to talk too. She had asked him if he wanted to do something after school in her most flirtatious manor. When Dave had stuttered though, she realized something was up. Wasn't this the confident asshole who has personally tortured Kurt and basically forced him to switch schools? While Dave continued to talk about how he was busy with the guys or doing laundry or some other lame excuse, like who would skip out on Santana, she's a hot piece of ass, she decided to watch his body language. (And Santana knew all about body language, she had been around more than enough bodies.) It appeared to her, that Dave was hiding something, and although she would love to stay and figure out. It still wasn't helping her any and Santana never got rejected ever, so she walked away before he could say no, making sure to whip her hair over her shoulder when she left and tell him that she just remembered she had a visit to make to her dear friend Kurt.
Obviously, the third person she visited was Kurt. It was odd for Santana to be in a place with so many boys, in fact, even in her dreams she had never imagined a place of this magnitude filled to the brim with so much fresh meat. After the third different guy that she had flirted with she realized most of these guys were either gay or had a girlfriend, not that it had ever stopped her before, but she was off her game. It was harder than she had imagined to find Kurt, the school was huge! Fortunately, she heard the Warblers practicing in a nearby lounge type thing, or was it some sort of common room? When she walked in she hadn't expected everyone to stop and stare at her, but it didn't matter she wasn't there to spy like that cute Asian kid had suggested, she had a purpose and she wasn't leaving until she succeed. She rushed forward and grabbed the innocent pale boy in front of her by the arm before realizing it was some ugly kid she didn't know. What hell was she going to have to go through to find Kurt? So, she did the only thing she could think of, she turned towards the Asian kid and got her flirt on. After a few of her key lines, he was like putty in her hands, although she still couldn't remember his name for the life of her. Finally, he guided her out of the room and started to bring her towards what could only be the library.
She had been in the library longer than she would have liked by the time she finally found the small boy she was looking for. Kurt didn't quite understand why Santana had been there and even after she tried to explain about the couples, he seemed to be even more confused. In fact, Santana seemed to just make the boy depressed himself. Nothing she had said had helped either, everything made the situation worse. When she brought up Mercedes, he looked like she'd killed his puppy. Whoops, apparently Mercedes and Finn were keeping their fling a secret from him. Then she brought up the Warblers, and he huffed into his seat and even allowed his shirt to get rumpled, a look he hadn't had since the Vocal Adrenaline 'Funk' the year before. To lighten the mood, she had even asked if he was getting any ass and at that he burst into tears, mumbling about how his feelings could never be returned or something and a Blaine kid or was it Blaire, or was it Shane… it was something like that. While she stood there trying to process what she had said wrong, he sprinted from the library and although she had once been a Cheerio, she hadn't continued working out after she quit and Kurt definitely knew the halls better than she did, and soon she was lost and Kurt was long gone. She was right back where she had been when she started this whole search, alone. For the first time since Santana had realized that she had no friends and that maybe being single wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, she cried. Right there in the hallways of Dalton, she cried.
The fourth, and final, person that Santana talked to was the only person she hadn't looked for. While crying in the hallways of an unfamiliar school, a curly haired kid, who she had remembered from Kurt's locker while he still went to McKinley, sat down next to her and just let her cry. And for the first time in a while, Santana didn't care what the outcome was, she wasn't alone anymore. It was this thought that led her to stop crying. When she looked into the eyes of the Blaire kid, or was it Shane, she knew that this was the person she needed to find. This was the person that would help her figure out what this whole mess was.
"I'm so sorry, I know I'm not supposed to be here. But I was chasing after Kurt and he obviously knows this school better than I do, and well I quit Cheerio's so I'm out of shape, and well I've been skipping the gym and I even enjoyed ice cream the other night. And well, I just, I didn't know where to go, I tried to find someone at school to talk to, but the whole Glee Club hates me, and well the other kids were creepy, I just, I had no one else to turn too. So I thought of Kurt, but then I guess I said some things that hurt his feelings and some things that maybe he wasn't supposed to know about. And he burst into tears and started to run away from me. And, I know I'm not supposed to be here, but will you please not tell on me? I have nowhere to go. It's just-." Santana rambled, she couldn't contain herself any longer, and she knew she wasn't making any sense at all, but she needed to get everything off of her chest. After she finally took a breath, she realized that Blake had no interest in cutting her off, in fact, he seemed like he only had time to listen to everything she had to say.
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you're here. As for Kurt, I have it on good authority that he is perfectly fine; it's you that everyone is worried about. And while, I was supposed to let them know as soon as you were found, I think there are some more important issues here, aren't there?" The boy told Santana, and she was so shocked with how much he realized just by her ramble. Well, Kurt had said he was very perceptive. "I'm Blaine by the way." So his name was Blaine!
"Can I ask you something?" Santana knew it was stupid to ask this, because she knew he would say yes, but she was feeling very insecure and she couldn't just leave McKinley for an all boys school like Kurt had.
"Of course." He replied to her.
"Have you ever felt like no one cares about you? That everyone else was partnered off and happy? That your best friend couldn't be bothered to talk to you because she was too busy with her new boyfriend who didn't even like to acknowledge your existence and made it seem like you were a nobody? I guess, what I mean is, have you ever felt just so alone?" Santana quickly said, she didn't even know when she stood up or when she started pacing until Blaine took her arm and led her down the hall, but not after he uttered a "So this is what it's about? Come on, follow me."
xox*
Two hours later, Santana found herself on her way home ready to sing it all out in Glee Club the next day. After her time with Blaine, she felt relieved, she understood her feelings and she almost felt bad for being so bitter to everyone, almost. All of these weeks she'd been so clouded with loneliness that she hadn't realized how unfair her best friend was treating her. Brittany was supposed to be her best friend, and she wasn't even there the one time she actually needed a friend. It didn't matter though, because Santana was finally ready to be happy for and by herself.
The following day, New Directions found Santana waiting in front of them. It was rare that Santana actually sang in front of the Glee Club while in rehearsal, actually even she couldn't remember a time she got up there all by herself just to sing because she wanted to. Before everyone finished walking in she received a text from Blaine saying "Courage", it made her laugh, and somehow she knew she was ready. After asking Mr. Schue if she could start today off with a song she had worked on, she gave the Club a little speech she had planned.
"Hey everyone, as you know I've been pretty much the only single person in Glee for a few weeks. Well I just thought I'd let you know my feelings through song. Brit, this one's for you." Santana winked at her 'best friend' and with that she signaled for Brad and the band to start playing.
One song, about a girl
I can't breathe, when I'm around her
I'll wait, here every day
In case, she'll scratch the surface
She'll never notice
To be loved, to be loved
What more could you ask for?
To be loved, to be loved
Everyone wants
To be loved, to be loved
What more could you ask for?
To be loved, to be loved
Everyone...
I'm not in love
This is not my heart
I'm not gonna waste these words
About a girl
Whoa!
Last night, I knew what to say
But you, weren't there to hear it
These lines, so well rehearsed
Tongue tied and over-loaded
You'll never notice
I'm not in love
This is not my heart
I'm not gonna waste these words
About a girl
I'm not in love
This is not your song
I'm not gonna waste these words
About a girl
I'm not in love
This is not my heart
I'm not gonna waste these words
I'm not in love
This is not my heart
I'm not gonna waste these words
About a girl
I'm not in love
(To be loved, to be loved, what more could you ask for?)
This is not your song
(To be loved, to be loved, everyone wants)
I'm not gonna waste these words
(To be loved, to be loved)
About a girl.
As the song closed, Santana felt relieved, everything that had happened to her recently was over. It was time to turn over a new leaf and to just enjoy life herself. She didn't even know when everyone had stood up to dance and sing with her until the song had ended and everyone laughed. After many apologies from various people, she realized that maybe the Glee kids were her true friends, and that she could have come to them in the first place instead of some long journey. Yet, as she left the Choir Room, she couldn't help but think that without her crazy journey, she never would have talked to Blaine. It was at this moment that she realized she owed Blaine, last night during their whole conversation, she had realized how Blaine reacted whenever Kurt was mentioned, and she was just too preoccupied to say anything about it.
After realizing this, she sent a quick text off to Blaine. "Thanks so much for everything, it went better than awesome. And you know I'm awesome. ;) Anyways, go get you some Kurt. We all know you each want in each other's pants."
"It's good to have you back. And oh hah hah hah. But maybe I'll just take that advice. :P" And with that reply from Blaine, Santana was off. She was happy and she realized that she didn't need anyone to make her happy. The whole time, the only person she needed was herself.
A/N: The song used is "About A Girl" by The Academy Is… It's such a great catchy song, and you should all look it up. Thanks so much for reading, and please review.