OPERATION: PULP FICTION!
By: Kato Shingetsu
Summary: Everyone is after Ansem in this loosely bound together story.
Disclaimer:
Stephen (one of Kato's many muses) is pushed on stage. " Ahem, my insane friend Kato Shingetsu does not own the copy rights to the following things:
Kingdom Hearts
Yu Yu Hakusho
Invader Zim
or Red vs Blue ( which is a parody of Halo...also something that Kato does not own)
So before you start a crusade to get this story banned, please remember: It's a fanfiction. Get a life!
Chapter One: Jimmy's Moosey Fate
Once upon a time warp, in the "magical" state known as Florida (everyone go BOOOO), there lived a really, really, REALLY stupid girl by the name of Kate-
" Don't you dare give them my real name!" someone shouted
Sorry...Kato Shingetsu. Anyhoo, one day, Kato was sitting in homeroom with her muses by the names of Ben and Jimmy. At one point, Jimmy noticed something.
" Since when is Mrs.Bitters from Invader Zim my Spanish II teacher?" Jimmy asked aloud
" SILENCE IDIOTIC HUMAN!" Mrs.Bitters spat and then continued in her "Doom" speech.
Jimmy looked over to Kato, who was sleeping in class. It was odd to see Kato in a Spanish class because she took French ( a/n: and I do! D)
" Hey Ben can ya wake up Kato?" Jimmy asked
Ben, who was busy reading a manga, nodded and poofed into his prairie dog form. Ben then hopped onto Kato's desk.
Ben gasped and shouted in Kato's ear: "KAAAAAATTTOOOOOOOOO!"
" WAHHHHHH!" Kato woke up with a jump and fell out of seat, " Ooow what was that for?"
"...I like French toast!" Ben randomly answered back and smiled.
" Were in another one of you stupid fanfictions" Jimmy said, " Which is stupid"
" That's funny..." Kato said, " I don't remember starting any new stories"
Just then a huge T.V screen appeared in front of them, separating then from Mrs.Bitters. Then, Ansem appeared on the giant T.V.
" Which one of you twerps is "Kato Shingetsu"?" Ansem said
Ben and Jimmy quickly pointed to Kato.
" I suspose your wondering why your in one of your own fanfictions hmm?" Ansem asked
Kato gave a shoulder shrug, " I do it all the time" Kato commented.
" YOU SUSPOSED TO BE MORE FRIGHTENED OF ME!" Ansem shouted " I AM THE KING OF DARKNESS!"
" Uh...I'm not frightened...a little hungry...but not frightened" Kato responded
" The I suppose you don't remember the Christmas party I had, do you?" Ansem asked
FLASHBACK
Ansem was having a classy Christmas party at the Hallow Bastion. As he stood there, on top of a chair, Ansem made his big speech.
" My dear Heartless minions!" Ansem shouted " We have had another successful year in out operation of spreading darkness"
The heartless shouted with cheers of joy and excitement.
" So eat drink and be merry!"
" HUZZAH!"
Just then, the windows behind Ansem were drenched with snowballs. Someone outside shouted " Get the roof!"
Ansem dashed outside to see Kato and the Shingetsu acting company along with three other people attacking the Hallow Bastion.
" GET OFF MY PROPERTY YOU STUPID KIDS!" Ansem shouted
" GET HIM!" Holly ( t.s.a.c's vice president) shouted
Ansem was plowed with a ton of snowballs and was left on the cold ground while the group ran off the property.
" To Sephiroth's house we go!" Ben (t.s.a.c's secretary) said
END FLASHBACK
" Oh yeah..." Kato said ( a'la Gir)
" Because of you I was made a laughing stock of MY own party" Ansem shouted " Now look out the window Shingetsu!"
Kato looked outside and saw that the classroom was really located on a gummi ship.
" Your launching us into outer space?" Kato exclaimed
" Insolent authoress!" Ansem said, " I am sending you to a wormhole"
" A wormhole!" both Ben and Kato repeated
" TACOS!" Jimmy shouted
" SILENCE!" Ansem shouted to Jimmy
" Fine!"Jimmy said and stood up, " I'm going to the bathroom", Jimmy left.
"...ahem...I had many different wormholes to choose to send you to. Like this one which would of taken you to a universe of complete itchyness!" Ansem said
A smaller screen appeared at the side of Ansem, showing a green blob tint.
" That stuff is really, really itchy" Ansem, " The second wormhole would have taken you to a world submerse in DARKNESS!"
Kato and Ben only had to see the screen to be frightened of the second wormhole (O.O!)
As Ansem was finishing his "second wormhole" bit, Riku could be scene in the background saying "Where's my walnuts?"
" But for you and you filthy comrades" Ansem said in a devious tone, " I've chosen this particular wormhole. For you see; at the end of this wormhole lies: A ROOM WITH A MOOSE!"
" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!-" Kato screamed but then paused, " Wait...Ansem, how is a room with a moose supposed to scare me?"
" Oh you'll see with this demonstration" Ansem said
The gummi ship that they were on fired out six walnuts into the wormhole. Riku could be heard in the background saying " My walnuts! Nooo V.V"
And lo' friends, when the six walnuts reached the room with the moose, a loud CRUNCH noise could be heard. Kato and Ben watched in horror as the moose decimated the six walnuts and munched on the with a blank expression.
" You a sick man!" Ben said with disgust
" Silence gopher-boy!" Ansem shouted back, " I leave you to your-...your"
" Say Moosey fate!" Riku said, " Moosey fate!"
" -Moosey fate" Ansem said and ended the transmission with a smug look.
The large screen went blank and disappeared leaving the three alone again with Mrs.Bitters.
" Doom...doom...doom" Mrs.Bitters repeated, continuing on with her "Doom" speech.
Kato flopped back into her seat. " I can't believe that crazy bastard's gonna get away with this Ben!" Kato said and then noticed that Ben wasn't paying attention, " Erm...Benji-..kun?"
" He called me...gopher-boy?...GOPHER-BOY!" Ben shouted and was enraged.
Ben, in his enraged state, warped into a more dark form of himself and began to destroy the wall in the back of the room. By the end of Ben's anger management episode, there was a hole in the wall that revealed a two man escape gummi ship.
" Ben your anger has paid off!" Kato said
Ben poofed back into normal human form and "chirrped".
The two got into the gummi ship.
" Now let's leave this God forsaken wormhole!" Kato said, " We go to the Hollow Bastion to get Ansem!"
AND SO
Jimmy pushed the door open with a kick. " My business..is done!" Jimmy shouted and looked around, " Where did Ben and Kato go?"
The lights flickered off in the ship and a woosh noise is heard. The gummi ship had landed inside the room with the Moose! ( dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnn!)
Jimmy walked outside the gummi ship and saw...ThE mOoSe!
The moose glared at Jimmy. Jimmy glared back at the moose. The moose still glared at Jimmy. Jimmy still glaring at the moose spoke: " If it's a staring contest ya want, Your on!"
NEXT TIME ON OPERATION: PULP FICTION
Will Jimmy beat the Moose in a staring contest?
Will Kato and Ben get to the Hallow Bastion?
And what do the fates have in store for the other pranksters who got Ansem?
Tune in next time and you might find out!
Chapter Notices- This chapter: Ben/Benji-Kun's random forms
1: "Normal"-mode (notice the nifty finger quotes)
2: Kawaii or Cuddly mode ( Think of a brown version of Yuki from Fruits Baskets in Rat form)
3: Dark Mode ( Think of Dark Inuyasha only with Brown hair and ears...and ya got it)