-This is a friend of MarioXXX, who goes by the anonymous review name "Luigicario." This is my first attempt at fanfiction, so constructive criticism please. And before anyone asks, this IS thought out, and didn't come from nowhere . Also, disclaimer: nothing in this story is mine. Now on to the story-
Tabuu's Breakfast
Chapter 1: The Invasion of Subspace
Peach was sitting in the lobby of the Smash Mansion enjoying a cup of tea. She happened to feel like walking around outside, but she had a match to go to, and didn't want to make Master Hand angry. But of course, she thought as she got up from a couch, I could always convince Crazy Hand to wear a dress again. That gave everyone nightmares.
As she went outside, she saw Kirby looking at a Strawberry plant that strangely had no berries left. Or, strangely if you don't know Kirby. All the other food-producing plants had no food on them either.
"You know that Master Hand will crush you for eating all the produce." Peach told Kirby.
"But it tastes so good, even the green strawberries." Kirby whined. "Hey look!" He yelled, pointing at a strange creature with a feather-like thing on its head and a rip in its back that was leaking purple spores. The creature was roughly human in shape.
"Hello?" Kirby asked the odd creature.
"I don't know if it is alive…" Peach stated, because it hadn't moved ever since it appeared.
"-Hey, what's up?-" Yoshi said and Peach used a translator to translate. "-The produce has disappeared, got any ideas?-" At this statement Kirby moved behind Peach. "-So it was you, Kirby! You'll pay for eating the bean fruits.-" Yoshi said while making Kirby into an egg.
The creature was watching, and took note that Yoshi could make eggs, something that its master wanted every morning. If I could only escape, it thought, before realizing that two of the creatures were bickering and the other was in an egg. Perfect, it thought as it ran away, knowing the location of the hidden mansion.
Just then Master Hand showed up.
"PEACH! You were supposed to be at the Temple stage 15 minutes ago! Why weren't you?" the hand yelled at Peach.
"Well, there was a weird creature here, and it looked weird, because it had, well, a feather on its head and purple stuff coming from its back, and…" Peach explained.
"A PRIMID?!" Master Hand interrupted, causing everyone to tremble.
"A what?" everyone asked (except Kirby because he was still in the egg).
"A monster from an army that will invade here." Mewtwo explained.
"How do you know, Mewtwo? And remind me, why are you still here?" Master Hand asked.
"I read your mind. And I read your mind and found out that you were dropping me and the others, told you I knew, threatened you, and you re-accepted me and the others because you didn't want me beating up on you like I did on Intense mode." Mewtwo explained.
"How would you know that was why?" the hand asked.
"I read your mind." Mewtwo said.
"Well, if there is an army coming, shouldn't we prepare?" Peach asked, interrupting the argument.
"You mean that dark silhouette that is coming?" Yoshi asked, and they all began to scream.
"Boo." The "army" said, turning out to be Crazy Hand.
"Well, ignoring my idiot brother, let's get prepared." Master hand said while slowly floating away.
The next day, everyone was ready for an attack. The swordsmen had grouped together in the front line, while Samus, Fox, Wolf, and Falco were in the back, in that order (much to Fox's dismay). It wasn't long before a Primid appeared, only it was holding a Beam Sword. Then more appeared behind it, until the army they fought was huge. But the Subspace Army only said one thing before charging: "BREAKFAST CEREAL TIME!"
"'Breakfast cereal time?'" Marth asked Zelda, who was nearby him.
"No clue," She said, "but they are about to run into a cliff."
Sure enough, the Subspace Army ran straight into the cliff that the mansion was on.
"Why did they do that?" Everyone asked at different times on the top of the cliff.
Then the ground started shaking.
"WESA GOIN DOWN!" Crazy Hand stupidly yelled, causing the cliff to collapse.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" was the only thing heard from the collapsing cliff.
Then it hit the ground.
"Ow." Everyone said at the same time, except Kirby, Mewtwo, Pit, Meta Knight, King Dedede, Charizard, and Jigglypuff, who all floated slowly down.
"On the plus side," Mewtwo stated, "that eliminated half their army."
"Yeah. So sad…" Peach said as they landed.
"But we want to kill them all!" Charizard said.
"Oh." Peach replied.
"Shouldn't you guys fight now?" Master Hand asked from above the cliff.
"Hey! Come down and fight!" Jigglypuff yelled to the two hands, who were playing cards up above.
"Fine, fine…" Master Hand said as he and Crazy Hand lit their cards on fire and threw them at the Subspace Army.
"EEEEEEEEKKK!" Primids screamed as the flaming cards (that were big enough for the hands to hold) fell on them.
"Now what?" the smashers on the ground asked after getting up.
"We attack?" Ike asked.
"Uh, I guess so." Zelda answered.
"Then CHARGE!" Link yelled as he started running, the others following.
"I know! I'll eat them all!" Kirby said as he sucked one into his mouth, and then turned green. "Yuck, those taste awful! Hey, look! I'm Green Kirby!"
"Just fight them." Meta Knight said.
All over the field that was bellow the cliff, battles were occurring. Ike and Marth fought some Autolances, robots with a big lance in front of them. Link, Toon Link, and Young Link fought the Primids with swords. Meta Knight dueled a couple Armights, squid like knights that floated. Pit chased a Poppant, a weird creature that threw candy everywhere. Kirby ate the Poppant's candy. Sheik threw needles at a group of Primids. The Pokémon pounded a Metal Primid. The Mario Bros. shot fireballs at some red, fire-breathing Fire Primids. The Star Fox team called down one landmaster, and then argued over who got it, with Falco mumbling something about "Arwing instead of landmaster." DK hit enemies to Diddy, who shot peanuts at them. Ness and Lucas combined PK Fires in the middle of some Primids. Snake stuck some mines inside a Big Primid. Bowser, Wario, Ganondorf, King Dedede, Wolf, and the Pokémon Trainer spoke with a purple tank.
"So, if I work with you, I get to pour lava on Mario?" Bowser asked, while breathing fire to emphasize his question.
"YES, THE PLUMBER WILL BE YOUR PLUNDER." The tank responded.
"And I will get a 2,000 ft. gold statue of myself on the Smash Mansion that fills up with garlic every day?" Wario asked, chuckling to himself.
"AFFIRMATIVE, GREAT WARIO. YOU WILL GET THE GOLD." The tank responded.
"I want the Triforce, but I also want an army of servants comprised of the strong smashers…" Ganondorf said.
"YOU MAY TAKE A SPARE TRIFORCE OF COURAGE," the tank replied, "BUT MY MASTER WANTS MOST OF THE SMASHERS TO BE HIS, AND TWO TRIFORCES. BUT TAKE THIS," a piece of the tank detached, "IT WILL ALLOW YOU TO CLONE THEM AND ORDER THE CLONES."
"I get to deflate da puffball?" King Dedede asked.
"YES. WE HAVE A DEFLATION STATION." The tank responded, revealing a rack with needles, suction pumps, and other such items.
"I'll work for you if I get to be in charge of torture of Fox and Falco." Wolf stated as he sharpened his claws.
"MY MASTER SPECIFIED THAT THOSE TWO ARE TO BE TORTURED BY AN AEROBICS CLASS ON LAVA. IS THAT FINE?" The tank stated and asked.
"As long as I get an air-conditioned glass capsule where I can drink lemonade in front of them." Wolf replied, imagining Fox and Falco's faces when they would see him sipping lemonade and they were burning their feet.
"I CAN ARANGE THAT." The tank said.
"I want to capture Pikachu, Pichu, Jigglypuff, Mewtwo, and Lucario. You guys'll help me?" The trainer asked the tank.
"ANYTHING THAT DOESN'T GO AGAINST MY MASTER'S ORDERS. THOSE 5 ARE DOWN AS SOLDIERS IN THE ARMY. WOULD YOU BE A GENERAL?" The (guess who) tank responded.
"I'm fine with that." The trainer (who was now in black pants with a black shirt with a red "R" on it) said. "Call me Black."
"I thought you were Red… ?" Ganondorf said.
"Nah. I changed it." Black said.
"Red is better than Black!" Bowser yelled.
"You only say that because your fire breath is red." Wario said.
"I wear da red coat, not da black one." King Dedede said to the group.
"Your *mumbling*terrible*end mumbling* fashion sense has nothing to do with this!" Wario yelled. "Besides, Yellow would be better!"
"But I met Yellow on my journey!" Red/Black exclaimed.
"YOU SHOULD CALL YOURSELF PURPLE." The tank said.
"You keep out of this, machine!" Red/Black told the tank.
"MACHINE?! YOU DARE OFFEND ME? NOW I WILL SHOW WHAT I REALY AM!" The tank yelled before it morphed into a giant robot. "WHAT IS YOUR OPINION NOW, MICRO-SPECKS?" Giant Robot asked.
"HEY! GET MY NAME RIGHT!" Giant Robot yelled at no one in particular.
"What is your name, anyways?" Wolf asked.
"I AM GALLEOM, PROUD ROBOT SERVANT OF TABUU!" Galleom, Proud Robot Servant of Tabuu said.
"GET MY NAME RIGHT NOW, AUTHOR." Galleom said randomly.
"Get his name right?" Dedede asked.
"Author?" Ganondorf asked.
"Who is Taboo?" Bowser asked, oblivious to the awkward moment.
"TABUU. NOT TABOO, TABUU!" Galleom said.
"Well, who is Taboo?" Bowser asked again.
"I'VE TOLD YOU TOO MUCH ALREADY, BUT IT'S TABUU, NOT TABOO." Galleom told the smashers.
In all the arguing, nobody noticed Charizard slipping away from Red, becau-
"IT"S BLACK!" Black yelled out.
-because they were too busy arguing. And nobody noticed that the Subspace Army was defeated and the other smashers, along with Charizard, were waiting patiently. Or, in some cases, impatiently.
"Well, I still say that I am Black now, and not Red." Black/Red stated in a mater-of-fact way. "And quit calling me 'Red/Black' or 'Black/Red!'"
"We aren't calling you those weird names. In fact, nobody is." Ganondorf said.
"Yeah." Dedede agreed.
"Well I disagree!" Bowser said.
"What? Who is calling him those?" Wario asked.
"Calling him what?" Bowser said, seemingly oblivious to the odd discussion that he interrupted.
"You don't notice a thing, do ya?" King Dedede asked.
"I still am disagreeing with you." Bowser said.
"What?" Dedede asked.
"…what?" Bowser asked.
"I think he means yes." Ganondorf whispered to Dedede.
"Well, I am now Black. Everyone agr- why are all the other smashers staring at us?" Black asked.
The other smashers were all now waiting impatiently.
"I THINK THEY FINISHED OFF OUR ARMY." Galleom stated.
"Ready to go down?" Ike asked.
"How could you betray us?" Charizard said.
"Charizard, into your Poke Ball, now!" Black said, searching his belt.
"You mean this?" Charizard asked, holding up a burnt-up Poke Ball.
"Feel the clone machine!" Ganondorf yelled, firing a beam at Link, Sheik, Toon Link, Meta Knight, Samus, Fox, and Olimar, causing the black alternate color from Brawl for each of them to appear. "Go!"
"GANONDORF, YOUR HAIR IS WHITE. LOOK IN MY MIRROR APP." Galleom said, holding out a reflective arm.
"GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Ganondorf yelled in terror.
"I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT ASPECT OF IT, SUPER-AGING THE USER." Galleom said to Ganondorf.
"Hey, look!" Black said, pointing to 7 defeated clones on the ground.
"What, Red?" Ganondorf asked, turning to see. "GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Ganondorf yelled in terror again.
"THIS CALLS FOR DRASTIC ACTION." Galleom said, flipping his arm to reveal a gong, and moving it beneath Ike's sword, Ragnell, because Ike was charging an eruption. Once Ike hit the gong, the noise of a gong ringing could be heard, but it wasn't very loud.
"That's all?" Marth asked.
"OOPS. I FORGOT TO DO SOMETHING." Galleom said while plugging in some speakers on his body. "NOW DO IT AGAIN."
Ike looked at the giant speakers and shook his head. "Nope."
"THEN I'LL DO IT." Galleom said as he flicked the gong, causing a deafening ring.
"Your right," Ganondorf said, "that is desperate."
"WHAT?" Bowser yelled.
"I SAID THAT IS DESPERATE!" Ganondorf yelled back.
"My ears stopped ringing." Wario said.
"Good. Mine did too." Bowser replied.
"HE SHOULD COME NOW." Galleom said to his group.
"Who?" Ganondorf asked.
"Me." A deep voice said.
"Who are you?" Mario asked.
"No one you need to know." Deep Voice said. "And my name ISN'T Deep Voice!" The voice hollered to no one.
"Really, who are you?" Wario asked.
"Your master." Your Master replied. "AND I AM NOT 'YOUR MASTER' EITHER!" The voice screamed in frustration.
"MASTER TABUU, WE NEED HELP." Galleom said to the voice.
"So, Galleom, you are the one who called. How many times must I tell you?" Tabuu asked Galleom.
"I AM SORRY…" Galleom apologized.
"Never, EVER call me when a Pokémon episode is on." Tabuu told Galleom.
"Tabuu likes Pokémon?" Black asked.
"Who knew." Ivysaur said.
"ME." Galleom said.
"That was rhetorical." Ivysaur said.
"Well, any last requests, smashers?" Tabuu asked.
"Don't make me do an aerobics class. I had a nightmare where I was doing one on lava." Fox said.
"And don't make me be very hot and have Wolf be sipping lemonade and be at the right temperature." Falco told Tabuu.
"Well, plans are plans, Star Fox." Tabuu said.
"WHAT?!" Fox and Falco said in unison.
"Any mor- HEY!" Tabuu said as he teleported behind Mario, who had shot a fireball at him, and attached some Chains of Light to Mario. "Dance." Tabuu said, pulling the chains.
"Dance Dance Revolution!" Mario stupidly hollered, before Tabuu destroyed the chains.
"Ugh… What happened?" Mario asked.
"I now will finish you one by one." Tabuu said to the smashers.
"Because you are too chicken to fight us all?" Mr. Game & Watch beeped to Tabuu.
"Very well then." Tabuu said. "You go down together."
The smashers watched Tabuu open his wings.
"Whoa, déjà vou." Link said.
"Isn't Sonic going to save us from this?" Marth asked.
Everyone looked at Sonic. He was asleep.
"Scrap that idea…" Zelda said.
"Now, you fall!" Tabuu said, emitting red rings from his wings.
"IT'S THE GREEN RINGS OF DEATH!" Crazy Hand yelled.
"I think you mean 'Red Rings of Death'" Master Hand corrected his idiot brother, just as the rings struck them all.
"Take them captive." Tabuu told Galleom.
Now for what happened to the smashers in captivity:
Mario: Mario was assigned the job of keeping the fireplace burning, so that Primids never get cold.
Luigi: Luigi was forced to keep the furnace hot 24-7, even though the furnace area is filled with ghosts.
Peach: Peach was controlled by Tabuu, and became the Director of Underage Primid Tea Parties (DPUTP)
Bowser: Bowser joined Tabuu and made Mario's job a nightmare by installing fans in the fireplace.
Mr. Game & Watch: MG&W was used to extract Shadow Bugs.
Pikachu: Was controlled by Black and used to fight Ike, Marth and Roy. Also used as a battery.
Jigglypuff: Was controlled by Black and used to fight.
Pichu: Was controlled by Black and not used to fight. Used as an emergency battery.
Pokémon Trainer, Squirtle, and Ivysaur: Joined Tabuu and commanded the Pokémon.
Charizard: Controlled by Black and used to fight.
Lucario: You can guess it.
Mewtwo: Go ahead, guess.
Marth: Stuck in a gladiator arena fighting the Primids and his friends.
Ike: Stuck in a gladiator arena fighting the Primids and his friends.
Roy: Stuck in a guess what.
Link: Triforce taken by Ganondorf, then stuck in a you-know-by-now.
Toon Link: Triforce taken by Tabuu, then stuck in a gladiator arena.
Young Link: Stuck in a _________ _____.
Zelda: Triforce taken by Tabuu, then forced to cook for the Primids.
Ganondorf: Joins Tabuu and gets Link's Triforce, as well as the seven clones.
Olimar: The Pikmin are forced to push a water wheel.
Kirby: Deflated by Dedede.
Meta Knight: Stuck in a gladiator arena.
King Dedede: Joined Tabuu, and deflated Kirby
Wario: Joined Tabuu and ate garlic all day long.
DK: Forced to pull a grinding wheel for the Primids' grain all day.
Diddy Kong: Peanut-powered light bulbs.
Lucas: His energy was drained and used for a few light bulbs.
Ness: See "Lucas."
Captain Falcon: Stuck on a hamster wheel that powered Tabuu's kitchen.
Ice Climbers: Stuck on a mountain-like treadmill and forced to climb to generate power.
R.O.B.: Reprogrammed to be Tabuu's servant forever.
Pit: Forced to make electricity by spinning his blades.
Fox: Doomed to do aerobics classes on lava, while seeing wolf drink lemonade and sit in an air-conditioned sphere.
Falco: See "Fox."
Wolf: Joined Tabuu, and watched Fox and Falco do aerobics classes on lava while in an air conditioned sphere and drinking lemonade.
Snake: Had all his weapons taken from him and used to build a robot that he had to fight.
Sonic: Forced to run as fast as he could on a hamster wheel and used to power a single 60 watt light bulb.
Samus: Had her power suit's power drained, but the suit was made so that she had to wear it.
And,
Yoshi: Yoshi was put in a modified hen-house, the Yoshi-House, along with an opposite gendered Yoshi, so that Tabuu could have eggs every morning. This is where the real story begins…
I hope you liked this. The main part of the story is coming up. Ideas for what Yoshi eats are accepted.
Reference: When Galleom said "TABUU, NOT TABOO, TABUU!" Is from the original Get Smart series when a villain named "The Claw" would always say "Craw, not Craw, Craw!" Whenever someone would call him "The Craw."