A/N: This is a short fic that was written for Bottle of Shine's Final Fantasy Kissing Contest on LiveJournal in response to the request of "FF12: Noah x Vaan" (primarily) and "FF12: Penelo x Larsa" (I snuck it in because I could!). The version here is slightly different from one on LJ – I had time to edit it a little more for a much more smoother piece. This takes place within my Ivalice Wings and Cages canon so if you are reading Vængir, it's all part of that same universe.
This story takes place after the final battle with Vayne on the Bahamut and refers to events that are spoilers. You have been warned.
Ghostly Answers
(by Sarasa Cat)
The soft salmon light of sunrise washed the Tchita Uplands, which seemed serene and safe when viewed from four thousand feet above its grassy plateaus. Vaan stretched his arms and cracked his neck while sitting in Strahl's cockpit. They still had another a few more hours of flight ahead of them before reaching Archades.
"Vaan." Penelo lightly tapped his shoulder. "She'll be fine on autopilot. You should go back and talk with him."
"What good will it do?"
"He's dying. I don't think he'll make it to Archades. You should talk to him."
Vaan studied the Strahl's dials and displays, trying his best to ignore Penelo, but she was persistent, as always.
"If you don't, you'll regret it. Go. Basch is back there." She grabbed his arms and pulled him to his feet. Her voice faded to a faint whisper. "Basch forgave him long before we boarded the Bahamut."
Earlier, Vaan had refused to help everyone else when they assembled a stretcher, removed some of Gabranth's heavy armor, and carried him aboard. Sure, the man—Noah—had helped them in the end and Vaan had even taken up his sword after he fell. But that was in the heat of battle. Now he couldn't face the man. He wanted to hate him, but he felt nothing. He only wanted to know why.
He walked into cargo to find Basch and Larsa at Noah's side. Larsa stood up as Vaan approached and Vaan just wrinkled his nose and swallowed hard as he pressed his lips together. He raised his hand to the bridge of his nose to avoid looking Basch in the eye.
As Basch and Larsa walked past him to enter the forward cabin, Vaan briefly felt the captain's strong grip upon his shoulder.
Vaan took a few steps forward, but he did not know what to do. He merely stood in the front of the cargo hold and looked at the dying man lying just a few feet before him. He thought of returning to the cockpit, but when he looked back he saw that Penelo was leaning against Basch, who seemed lost in his thoughts, and she was holding Larsa in her arms, peppering his hair with kisses. Larsa nuzzled his tear-stained blotchy cheeks against her breast. Vaan remembered what it was like to be Larsa's age. His actions were not as innocent as Penelo claimed them to be.
Vaan stepped forward and knelt near the bunk where Noah lay. Noah's eyes were closed. His breath rattled. Vaan leaned forward to look at the sickly dark purple bruises on his face, the deep lacerations on his left cheek, anything, any small detail that would focus his mind on something other than the actual person who lay before him.
"My brother." Noah's voice rasped, tinged with fright, as his hand reached toward Vaan. Noah's head turned, eyelids parting slightly, but his gaze remained unfocused. "Stay with me."
Vaan tentatively took hold of Noah's hand. His grip was weak, ghostly. Vaan watched Noah's face as his eyes closed. His lips were parched and flecked with white dried salt and saliva. Vaan grimaced as he gripped Noah's hand tighter, yet in response Noah sighed and his breathing eased just a bit. Vaan found himself unable to ask the questions that had plagued him for years.
"I always assumed…" The words slipped out as Noah exhaled. "I would die alone." His eyes closed. "I am beyond forgiveness. My soul is wholly stained and saturated with my sins of compliance, my cowardice."
Vaan leaned forward and gripped the man's hand tightly with both of his own hands.
"One day," Noah spoke in whispers, and only as he exhaled, "when you are very old and travel beyond, you will not find me supping with our ancestors." Noah's voice was so weak and small that Vaan needed to lean closely to hear him.
"The blood that has stained me will not be washed clean. I will soon try to cross the river but my soul will be torn asunder by pale hands before I reach the other side. And that shall be my end. I will find the courage to do that. I will find the courage I could not find in Archades, in Nalbina, in Landis. And I will not remain here, haunting all of you as a lingering hungry ghost that does nothing but cause pain for others who still draw breath."
Vaan leaned forward and gently kissed Noah's cheek, letting his lips linger before he embraced the man. "You're not alone," Vaan whispered into his ear, knowing that no one else was there to see them.